How To Cope With Pain

[retepsnikrep]

Transient, relatively short-lived periods of pain, i.e. toothache, childbirth, shutting fingers in a door, give you a good idea of what it is like, but not a long enough experience to need to formulate plans to deal with it for a long period. 'Deal With It', in this case, does not mean making it go away, but hopefully making it easier to cope with.

I know it's not as cheerful a subject as 'A Day In Disneyland.' or 'Fun With Cotton Reels.' but let's be matter-of-fact about it. It's all in life, the overall glorious existence that we share, so we can call anything to do with it cheerful if we like, and I like.

Qualifications. It would be unwise to be advised on deep sea diving by someone who had never got their feet wet. I am qualified. I've got the cancer version of pain, in the 'past curing' stage. I've been like that a long time and may still be 'past curing' when I die at a ripe old age. I'm qualified because it hurts more or less all the time in varying degrees so I have tried to cope with it in various ways:-

KID IT. Stretch out, place a warm hand (your own) on the affected place and with the ease that gives, however slight, talk out, exult. 'Hey! This is alright. Luxury like this. Very nice indeed.' and it is so. The pain will come back at you of course, but a regular easement, and we all have developed a way of doing that, even if only for a few seconds, will help. Then gloat about life. You can start to convince yourself and that's the whole idea.

STIR IT UP. Pain comes in all different shapes and sizes, and each has it's own idiosyncracies. Mine doesn't like walking. So after a little walk about and it's pouring on the coals, sit down, get those feet in the exact position for a little relief. As it abates you can talk out loud again. 'That's better.' 'Ah Lovely.' You are giving yourself a benefit, so give this positive thing voice. You are talking to yourself, so what, you are the one that needs the good vibes.

READ. You can get your mind off pain by reading, and if you close down some of your brain by occupying it with a book, there is less brain for the pain to annoy. Read thoroughly, no skimming, or for every missed word the pain will hurt you. Read something technical if you can, like the specification of all 20th Century bicycles, or the genera of beetles in Scotland. Read as if your future depends on an exam tomorrow. If you don't understand something, i.e. the difference between a Jock Beetle and a Jack Beetle, re-read it until you do understand. Read this post and my others, I may come and test you.

LUXURIES. Pain can't stop you enjoying a trifle, a whisky, chocolate, or a fag, if you separate the two. Let the trifle spoil the intrusion of the pain, rather that the pain spoil enjoyment of the trifle. Talking it to yourself helps. 'This (sip) is absolutely (sip) super beer.' Remember you can enjoy the freedom from harmful consequences. If you're on the cancer road you don't have to worry about cholesterol. You could eat a slab of lard if you want.

POSITION. Social graces are out of the window now if it eases the pain. Sit in the Lotus position with your hand down your trousers if you want. You are allowed. You don't have to wear a suit and collar and tie, or even pants if you don't want to. Be comfortable.

DON'T FIGHT IT. You've got enough on your plate without an internal war. You know I don't mean give in to the disease. What I do mean is don't grit your teeth, tense yourself up, and defy the pain. It won't be denied, but the hints I have given above, learnt from my experience, may help you to deal with it a bit better.

Peter

I don't know who you are...but I like your style.

[koan]

While I was reading that I kept thinking about how beautiful you are.
Just wanted to share that with you.

Thank you.