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Thread: Lesser-known Gods

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    Lesser-known Gods

    (I found this today while looking for something else....serendipity!)


    The Lesser Known Gods And Demi-Gods Of Greece

    Listed below is a selected list of many of the lesser-known gods and
    demi-gods of Greece that have apparently been ignored or forgotten by
    historians for various and sundry reasons. Some of these gods were obviously
    important and useful in everyday life habits, others apparently had no
    redeeming value whatsoever, but somehow achieved god - or goddesshood.
    This list is presented here in the hopes that it will prove helpful to someone
    somewhere, sometime.

    * Egregious - God of Errors.

    Though he spent virtually all his life with the other gods and goddesses on
    Mount Olympus, he is rumored to have left for a short vacation to the south
    of France where he met and had an affair with the French goddess, Faux Pas.
    Egregious was one of the smartest gods on Mount Olympus. In fact, many
    thought he might be as smart as Zeus, though no one would ever admit this
    publicly. However, his unfortunate habit of making so many mistakes kept him
    from becoming one of the better-known gods.

    When asked how someone so smart could make so many stupid mistakes, his
    reply was always "You learn from your mistakes. Obviously, I've made so MANY
    mistakes, I've become a genius!"

    * Melanoma - God of Tanning.

    Often seen away from Mount Olympus and down along the sandy beaches of
    southern Greece, Melanoma could have been ranked up there with the other
    major gods of his time, He was strong, handsome, and had a body that
    attracted all the goddesses. His only major fault was getting involved with
    the mortal Macedonian strip queen, Ultra Violet.

    The two of them constantly played naked in the sun along the Greek
    shoreline. Zeus, upon seeing Melanoma cavorting with a non-Olympian, decided
    to punish him by taking away his immortality. This didn't seem to bother
    Melanoma at first and he continued to associate with Ultra Violet and played
    in the buff each day. Soon though, Melanoma started to notice small dark
    patches on his skin that eventually became cancerous. He died a quick, but
    horrible death, with Ultra Violet at his side till the very end.

    * Ozone - God of Memory.

    Ozone was another failed god. Upon attaining godhood, Zeus asked Ozone to
    choose the subject for which he would be revered for all time. He chose
    Memory. To celebrate his attaining full godliness, Ozone married his school
    sweetheart, Amnesia. However, their foggy relationship soon resulted in the
    complete loss of all the records of all the great gods on Mount Olympus.

    Zeus retaliated by immediately expelling Ozone to Southern California, where
    he was held prisoner in the dreaded "Inversion Layer" along with the evil
    nether-world dragon-god of progress and technology, Smog.

    * Pancreas - Demi-god of Dessert.

    Father of the sugar gods, Arabinose, Fructose, and Glucose.

    Pancreas was a short-lived god who spent most of his time on coffee breaks
    eating donuts. His marriage to Diabetes was no help to him at all and he
    died soon after they had their three sons.

    * Peristalsis - God of Bowel Movements.

    Revered for his strength and perseverance, Peristalsis occupied a special
    place in the bathrooms of old Greece. Figurines in his likeness stood next
    to or near the place of anal evacuation. A special prayer to Peristalsis
    often accompanied a trip to the bathroom in some of the better bathrooms of
    high-society Greeks.

    * Uvula - Goddess of Swallowing.

    Uvula was an often unappreciated goddess who spent most of her time at the
    back of the room of all the other gods and goddesses on Mount Olympus. Only
    when she cleared her throat did anyone bother to pay any attention to her.
    She originally came from Rome and was accepted into the Greek goddess
    system, but only because of the promise she showed. She was reported to
    spend some time with the god Fellatio (a part-Italian god) who promised to
    show her something she could do that would make her one of the most revered
    goddesses of all of Mount Olympus (at least by the gods there). They were to
    meet one hot and steamy night under an olive tree where Fellatio would show
    her what she could do. Unfortunately, Fellatio never came.

    * Zirconia - Goddess of Costume Jewelry.

    Often in direct competition with the goddesses Titanium and Platinum,
    Zirconia was pretty much always relegated to being allowed only to attend
    the lesser parties on Mount Olympus at which the great gods and goddesses
    were rarely present. As a result, Zirconia was subsequently ignored by most
    historians and now only shows up on the backs of magazines for really cheap
    prices.
    My candle's burning at both ends, it will not last the night. But ah, my foes, and oh, my friends--It gives a lovely light!--Edna St. Vincent Millay

  2. #2
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    Re: Lesser-known Gods

    I love it

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    Re: Lesser-known Gods

    Maybe we should perform some rituals, MF? I'll take Zirconia....you?
    My candle's burning at both ends, it will not last the night. But ah, my foes, and oh, my friends--It gives a lovely light!--Edna St. Vincent Millay

  4. #4
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    Re: Lesser-known Gods

    Quote Originally Posted by Lulu2 View Post
    (I found this today while looking for something else....serendipity!)


    The Lesser Known Gods And Demi-Gods Of Greece

    Listed below is a selected list of many of the lesser-known gods and
    demi-gods of Greece that have apparently been ignored or forgotten by
    historians for various and sundry reasons. Some of these gods were obviously
    important and useful in everyday life habits, others apparently had no
    redeeming value whatsoever, but somehow achieved god - or goddesshood.
    This list is presented here in the hopes that it will prove helpful to someone
    somewhere, sometime.

    * Egregious - God of Errors.

    Though he spent virtually all his life with the other gods and goddesses on
    Mount Olympus, he is rumored to have left for a short vacation to the south
    of France where he met and had an affair with the French goddess, Faux Pas.
    Egregious was one of the smartest gods on Mount Olympus. In fact, many
    thought he might be as smart as Zeus, though no one would ever admit this
    publicly. However, his unfortunate habit of making so many mistakes kept him
    from becoming one of the better-known gods.

    When asked how someone so smart could make so many stupid mistakes, his
    reply was always "You learn from your mistakes. Obviously, I've made so MANY
    mistakes, I've become a genius!"

    * Melanoma - God of Tanning.

    Often seen away from Mount Olympus and down along the sandy beaches of
    southern Greece, Melanoma could have been ranked up there with the other
    major gods of his time, He was strong, handsome, and had a body that
    attracted all the goddesses. His only major fault was getting involved with
    the mortal Macedonian strip queen, Ultra Violet.

    The two of them constantly played naked in the sun along the Greek
    shoreline. Zeus, upon seeing Melanoma cavorting with a non-Olympian, decided
    to punish him by taking away his immortality. This didn't seem to bother
    Melanoma at first and he continued to associate with Ultra Violet and played
    in the buff each day. Soon though, Melanoma started to notice small dark
    patches on his skin that eventually became cancerous. He died a quick, but
    horrible death, with Ultra Violet at his side till the very end.

    * Ozone - God of Memory.

    Ozone was another failed god. Upon attaining godhood, Zeus asked Ozone to
    choose the subject for which he would be revered for all time. He chose
    Memory. To celebrate his attaining full godliness, Ozone married his school
    sweetheart, Amnesia. However, their foggy relationship soon resulted in the
    complete loss of all the records of all the great gods on Mount Olympus.

    Zeus retaliated by immediately expelling Ozone to Southern California, where
    he was held prisoner in the dreaded "Inversion Layer" along with the evil
    nether-world dragon-god of progress and technology, Smog.

    * Pancreas - Demi-god of Dessert.

    Father of the sugar gods, Arabinose, Fructose, and Glucose.

    Pancreas was a short-lived god who spent most of his time on coffee breaks
    eating donuts. His marriage to Diabetes was no help to him at all and he
    died soon after they had their three sons.

    * Peristalsis - God of Bowel Movements.

    Revered for his strength and perseverance, Peristalsis occupied a special
    place in the bathrooms of old Greece. Figurines in his likeness stood next
    to or near the place of anal evacuation. A special prayer to Peristalsis
    often accompanied a trip to the bathroom in some of the better bathrooms of
    high-society Greeks.

    * Uvula - Goddess of Swallowing.

    Uvula was an often unappreciated goddess who spent most of her time at the
    back of the room of all the other gods and goddesses on Mount Olympus. Only
    when she cleared her throat did anyone bother to pay any attention to her.
    She originally came from Rome and was accepted into the Greek goddess
    system, but only because of the promise she showed. She was reported to
    spend some time with the god Fellatio (a part-Italian god) who promised to
    show her something she could do that would make her one of the most revered
    goddesses of all of Mount Olympus (at least by the gods there). They were to
    meet one hot and steamy night under an olive tree where Fellatio would show
    her what she could do. Unfortunately, Fellatio never came.

    * Zirconia - Goddess of Costume Jewelry.

    Often in direct competition with the goddesses Titanium and Platinum,
    Zirconia was pretty much always relegated to being allowed only to attend
    the lesser parties on Mount Olympus at which the great gods and goddesses
    were rarely present. As a result, Zirconia was subsequently ignored by most
    historians and now only shows up on the backs of magazines for really cheap
    prices.
    Oh my life! That's priceless!!!

  5. #5
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    Re: Lesser-known Gods



    How come they're not in my Oxford Classical Dictionary???

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    Re: Lesser-known Gods

    Register to remove this ad.
    Not enough room? Devotees of the BIGGER gods didn't you to know about the others?

    I'm building a temple to SENILIA....she often seems to be holding me in her arms!
    My candle's burning at both ends, it will not last the night. But ah, my foes, and oh, my friends--It gives a lovely light!--Edna St. Vincent Millay

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