Pain Versus Time Out

[Lon]

I can remember the pain but doubt that I would have ever remembered TIME OUT. It's that little reminder that has turned me out to be the warm, wonderful and well adjusted individual that I am.

Does this TIME OUT crap really work?

[Galbally]

Nah, probably not, but your not allowed to say stuff like that anymore apparently. The little darlings might hear you, and they might get scared that might actually get punished some day for "doing bad stuff".

That said, I think the main thing about teaching children about discipline, authority and self-control is that you make rules that are fair and understandable, and that you keep everything consistent, and a slap is part of that sometimes. But you should never hit a child in anger as that is just teaching a child that its normal to use violence when it gets angry itself.

My parents rarely slapped me, my mother far more than my father ever did, in fact I think he only ever slapped me twice in my life, but my mam, well that was a different story, she certainly would slap me if I did something wrong, but thats the rub, it was only when I did something that was really wrong, not because she was just annoyed at me. That's the difference.

[buttercup]

My mother slapped us a lot, cant remember a single time we deserved it.

[Victoria]

MY parents gave us a slap now and then.. but the worst was when my father would call us in and sit us down on the sofa. Then he waould look at us sergent major style and ask 'well who has something to tell me'? It was like going to confession..terrifiying, and worse than any resulting slap.


I had a 1, 2 ,3 system with my kids clean up, move, get ready, ect if they didnt respond Id count 1, 2, 3, if they hadn't moved then Id scoop up whatever they had incl school work and it went straight into the bin. Any protest, and it was 'bed now' no talk , no backchat.

I think I only ever got to chuck things in the bin 3 times, once for each child they knew then I was serious.
Smacking was not really something I had to resort to.
Mind you last night one of my sons friends told him he was so lucky to have such relaxed parents, maybe we just didnt think they did much worth punishment.

[buttercup]

I think hurting a child or an animal just shows you have no idea how to cope with the situation and are out of control yourself.

[kazalala]

I "Slapped" my kids a few times,when they were young. I was wrong.

[Rapunzel]

Originally Posted by buttercup

My mother slapped us a lot, cant remember a single time we deserved it.

Ditto. I was slapped at least once every day. My mother would take her petty frustrations out by slapping us. It drove her insane that I refused to slap my kids.

Today my kids and I have a great relationship, much better than I ever had with my mother. I never did time out, it's not really an english thing. I would just talk to my kids about what was naughty and why. People are always telling me what lovely children they are. Talking to your children, about anything and everything, and listening to them, is SO much better than punishing them.

[Betty Boop]

Originally Posted by Rapunzel

Ditto. I was slapped at least once every day. My mother would take her petty frustrations out by slapping us. It drove her insane that I refused to slap my kids.

Today my kids and I have a great relationship, much better than I ever had with my mother. I never did time out, it's not really an english thing. I would just talk to my kids about what was naughty and why. People are always telling me what lovely children they are. Talking to your children, about anything and everything, and listening to them, is SO much better than punishing them.

I'm the same, my two know when to behave and they know when they are in trouble too. My daughter is very stubborn, time out didn't work for her, just as ignoring tantrums makes her twenty times worse . I generally let her go for so long then hug her, she's usually so suprised that I still want to do such a thing that it stops her instantly and it's so much nicer for her to go to sleep calm.
Smacking produces more smacking as I found out the hard way a long time ago, when I realised what was happening I stopped it. After all, how can I tell my children not to smack me when they are angry with me if I do it to them in the first place.

[K.Snyder]

You'll never in your life find a woman that is nicer than my mother

She literally breaks her back just to appease those she loves and they(we) don't have to ask for a thing. She tries to literally do everything in the world for everyone EVERYONE

But man, when we that woman off! Man! She'd tear in to our hind ends!

That woman turned Supreme Administer of whoopin

Oh, we deserved it

I can't thank her enough for it