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Clancy wrote: Dear Unc
If our esteemed member, Valerie visited Newcastle, on February 14th ... and ordered up a Greek casserole in a restaurant, then drowned the waiters by pushing them into the river, could that be called.....
Val in Tynes day Moussaka
I bow to your genius Clancy :wah:
If our esteemed member, Valerie visited Newcastle, on February 14th ... and ordered up a Greek casserole in a restaurant, then drowned the waiters by pushing them into the river, could that be called.....
Val in Tynes day Moussaka
I bow to your genius Clancy :wah:
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Clancy wrote: Dear Unc
If our esteemed member, Valerie visited Newcastle, on February 14th ... and ordered up a Greek casserole in a restaurant, then drowned the waiters by pushing them into the river, could that be called.....
Val in Tynes day Moussaka
If a chap who had a keen interest in birds of prey liked to vacuum his apartment at night with the lights out, could that be called
Hawk/Kestral Man Hoovers In The Dark...?
If our esteemed member, Valerie visited Newcastle, on February 14th ... and ordered up a Greek casserole in a restaurant, then drowned the waiters by pushing them into the river, could that be called.....
Val in Tynes day Moussaka
If a chap who had a keen interest in birds of prey liked to vacuum his apartment at night with the lights out, could that be called
Hawk/Kestral Man Hoovers In The Dark...?
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If a man had a job as an inspector of fire escapes, and his hobby was collecting jewellery trinkets which he kept in his basement, could it be called
The Charm-Cellar of the Exit Checker....?
The Charm-Cellar of the Exit Checker....?
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SnoozeControl wrote: I need to make a wav file of me screaming in agony, don't I?
No need - I can hear you all the way over here:wah:
No need - I can hear you all the way over here:wah:
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Nomad wrote: What if ?
Well if that scenario were to present itself, and I suppose it could happen, heaven help us all :-3
Well if that scenario were to present itself, and I suppose it could happen, heaven help us all :-3
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Clipper wrote: Yo Unk.........Post a pic of the infamous Snooze boob willya.........
I haven't got it Clipper,but if you could talk me through it, I will endeavour to sketch a photo-fit for identification purposes
I haven't got it Clipper,but if you could talk me through it, I will endeavour to sketch a photo-fit for identification purposes
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As he started me off, this one's for Clancy
A man walks into a restaurant and orders squid.
"Certainly Sir," says Jervaise the waiter, "Would you like to choose your squid from the tank over there?"
"I'll have that little green one with the moustache" says the customer.
"Oh no!" replies Jervaise "but he's my favourite! - He's so small and cute and friendly. Surely you'd prefer one of the bigger, meatier ones?"
"No" says the customer "It's got to be that one".
So Jervaise gets the little green squid out and puts him on the chopping block, raises his knife and ....... the little squid looks up and smiles, twitching his bushy moustache into a big friendly grin!
"It's no good", says Jervaise, "I can't do it. I'll have to ask Hans who does the washing up. He's a big, tough brute - he'll be able to do the evil deed."
So out comes Hans, while Jervaise disappears off in tears. Hans picks up the knife, raises it to chop the little squid's head off and...... once again the little friendly squid looks up and smiles, wiggling his little legs and twitching his little moustache. So Hans, too, finds it impossible to kill him.
The moral?
.
.
.
.
Hans that does dishes is as soft as Jervaise with mild green hairy-lip squid.
A man walks into a restaurant and orders squid.
"Certainly Sir," says Jervaise the waiter, "Would you like to choose your squid from the tank over there?"
"I'll have that little green one with the moustache" says the customer.
"Oh no!" replies Jervaise "but he's my favourite! - He's so small and cute and friendly. Surely you'd prefer one of the bigger, meatier ones?"
"No" says the customer "It's got to be that one".
So Jervaise gets the little green squid out and puts him on the chopping block, raises his knife and ....... the little squid looks up and smiles, twitching his bushy moustache into a big friendly grin!
"It's no good", says Jervaise, "I can't do it. I'll have to ask Hans who does the washing up. He's a big, tough brute - he'll be able to do the evil deed."
So out comes Hans, while Jervaise disappears off in tears. Hans picks up the knife, raises it to chop the little squid's head off and...... once again the little friendly squid looks up and smiles, wiggling his little legs and twitching his little moustache. So Hans, too, finds it impossible to kill him.
The moral?
.
.
.
.
Hans that does dishes is as soft as Jervaise with mild green hairy-lip squid.
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.........That's a classic Unc. !!!
A smile is a window on your face to show your heart is home
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Is being color blind a job requirement for hotel room decorators???:-2
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This thread is frustrating me !
I can't think of nothing to ask !
I can't think of nothing to ask !
A smile is a window on your face to show your heart is home
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ArnoldLayne wrote: Must be an English thing. Its from an old commercial
Hands that do dishes are as soft as your face, with Mild Green Fairy Liquid
I could sing it in a wav file if you like
DO IT ARNOLD
But wait until I'm wearing my incontinence pads:D
Hands that do dishes are as soft as your face, with Mild Green Fairy Liquid
I could sing it in a wav file if you like
DO IT ARNOLD
But wait until I'm wearing my incontinence pads:D
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ArnoldLayne wrote: Thats almost enough
When is enough not enough though ?
When is enough not enough though ?
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ArnoldLayne wrote: Thats almost enough
But not quite :sneaky:
But not quite :sneaky:
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ArnoldLayne wrote: I bought a dozen oysters today but only eleven worked . Should I get my money back ?
You obviously didn't pay them enough !
You obviously didn't pay them enough !
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ArnoldLayne wrote: I bought a dozen oysters today but only eleven worked . Should I get my money back ?
How many clams did you pay?
were you using them as an aphrodisiac Arnold?:D
How many clams did you pay?
were you using them as an aphrodisiac Arnold?:D
Someone asked me why I swear so much. I said, "Just becuss.":)
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ArnoldLayne wrote: I bought a dozen oysters today but only eleven worked . Should I get my money back ?
Depends how much you had to shell out. I'm led to believe that oysters are like bogies but without the taste. Are you able to verify this pearl of wisdom Arnold?
Depends how much you had to shell out. I'm led to believe that oysters are like bogies but without the taste. Are you able to verify this pearl of wisdom Arnold?
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- StupidCowboyTricks
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ArnoldLayne wrote: You'll be needing new batteries for that Ninpundo.
Its a strange coincidence because often bogies can be like whelks. I was told once that oysters taste of "where they come from". I am relieved to say , the same premise does not apply to eggs
,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,
Its a strange coincidence because often bogies can be like whelks. I was told once that oysters taste of "where they come from". I am relieved to say , the same premise does not apply to eggs
,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,
Someone asked me why I swear so much. I said, "Just becuss.":)
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ArnoldLayne wrote: Which bit do you need a translation for ?
She's just egging you on Arnold
She's just egging you on Arnold
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Nomad wrote: What if ?
I have already NOT answered that Nomad
I have already NOT answered that Nomad
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is it possible to un-answer a question ?
A smile is a window on your face to show your heart is home
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Was Jimi Hendrix really the great guitarist all seem to claim ?
I think he was a technical master but his music lacked soul, or at least my version of it, an example of soulful guitar would be Carlos Santana.
His music also lacked composition, it was more improvisational and less melodic in a full music listening sense.
I think he was a technical master but his music lacked soul, or at least my version of it, an example of soulful guitar would be Carlos Santana.
His music also lacked composition, it was more improvisational and less melodic in a full music listening sense.
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Bez wrote: is it possible to un-answer a question ?
Yes Bez, but first I must receive an application written in the blood of a nobleman requesting permission for you to un-ask the question
Yes Bez, but first I must receive an application written in the blood of a nobleman requesting permission for you to un-ask the question
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Nomad wrote: Was Jimi Hendrix really the great guitarist all seem to claim ?
I think he was a technical master but his music lacked soul, or at least my version of it, an example of soulful guitar would be Carlos Santana.
His music also lacked composition, it was more improvisational and less melodic in a full music listening sense.
Old James Marshall Hendrix, the paratrooping virtuoso was of course massively influential and I for one am rather fond of his output.
The greatest guitarist?...... Probably would have been if he could only have managed to play his instrument the right way round and not upside down :guitarist
I think he was a technical master but his music lacked soul, or at least my version of it, an example of soulful guitar would be Carlos Santana.
His music also lacked composition, it was more improvisational and less melodic in a full music listening sense.
Old James Marshall Hendrix, the paratrooping virtuoso was of course massively influential and I for one am rather fond of his output.
The greatest guitarist?...... Probably would have been if he could only have managed to play his instrument the right way round and not upside down :guitarist
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How many Gold Medals for the Chzek womens turd throwing relay ?
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StupidCowboyTricks wrote: ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,
Quote:
Originally Posted by ArnoldLayne
You'll be needing new batteries for that Ninpundo.
Its a strange coincidence because often bogies can be like whelks. I was told once that oysters taste of "where they come from". I am relieved to say , the same premise does not apply to eggs
all of it.
Quote:
Originally Posted by ArnoldLayne
You'll be needing new batteries for that Ninpundo.
Its a strange coincidence because often bogies can be like whelks. I was told once that oysters taste of "where they come from". I am relieved to say , the same premise does not apply to eggs
all of it.
Someone asked me why I swear so much. I said, "Just becuss.":)
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Lots of people are arguing on here lately.
Can you tell me if this is because there is a full moon, a new moon, a blue moon or because the moon is made of cheese??
ALSO, will you be opening a betting book so we can start laying down some odds??? :wah:
Can you tell me if this is because there is a full moon, a new moon, a blue moon or because the moon is made of cheese??
ALSO, will you be opening a betting book so we can start laying down some odds??? :wah:
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When is Snoozer going to start one of these "Ask Snooze anything" threads?
And does Snoozer snore when she's snoozing?
And does Snoozer snore when she's snoozing?
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There are clubs for members with thousands of points.
There are clubs for members who are pink and fluffy
There are clubs for members who like to hug...
So can you pleeeeeeaase start a club for low-pointed, noodle-headed, un-clique-y wannabees, which is those of us
(well okay, mee) who have more hair than brains. Thankee kindly, Unk.
I thought we could be called the 'mouldy catch'! Whaddaya think??
There are clubs for members who are pink and fluffy
There are clubs for members who like to hug...
So can you pleeeeeeaase start a club for low-pointed, noodle-headed, un-clique-y wannabees, which is those of us
(well okay, mee) who have more hair than brains. Thankee kindly, Unk.
I thought we could be called the 'mouldy catch'! Whaddaya think??
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An anti-clique clique? Won't that tear a hole in the space-clique contiuum?
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Accountable wrote: An anti-clique clique? Won't that tear a hole in the space-clique contiuum?
*CLICK*
:D
*CLICK*
:D
Someone asked me why I swear so much. I said, "Just becuss.":)
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Nomad wrote: How many Gold Medals for the Chzek womens turd throwing relay ?
Well initially there was great euphoria in the Czech camp as they appeared to have garnered 4 much sought after Gold Medals.
This excitement was however, short lived following intervention by the judges who decided to disqualify them for 2 reasons
1. One of the turds thrown had inadvertantly struck a spectator which caused a furore. In fact it was claimed that the sh*t had hit the fan
2. They didn't accept Czechs
Well initially there was great euphoria in the Czech camp as they appeared to have garnered 4 much sought after Gold Medals.
This excitement was however, short lived following intervention by the judges who decided to disqualify them for 2 reasons
1. One of the turds thrown had inadvertantly struck a spectator which caused a furore. In fact it was claimed that the sh*t had hit the fan
2. They didn't accept Czechs
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Rapunzel wrote: Lots of people are arguing on here lately.
Can you tell me if this is because there is a full moon, a new moon, a blue moon or because the moon is made of cheese??
ALSO, will you be opening a betting book so we can start laying down some odds??? :wah:
Well I hope this isn't a war of attrition and that the dust will settle. I don't do controversy and others put things much better than I could anyway.
All I will say is that I am hurting for those who are hurting so big hugs to them.
I think it may have been thrown out of balance by the conspicuous absence of Alfie Moon
Can you tell me if this is because there is a full moon, a new moon, a blue moon or because the moon is made of cheese??
ALSO, will you be opening a betting book so we can start laying down some odds??? :wah:
Well I hope this isn't a war of attrition and that the dust will settle. I don't do controversy and others put things much better than I could anyway.
All I will say is that I am hurting for those who are hurting so big hugs to them.
I think it may have been thrown out of balance by the conspicuous absence of Alfie Moon
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Rapunzel wrote: There are clubs for members with thousands of points.
There are clubs for members who are pink and fluffy
There are clubs for members who like to hug...
So can you pleeeeeeaase start a club for low-pointed, noodle-headed, un-clique-y wannabees, which is those of us
(well okay, mee) who have more hair than brains. Thankee kindly, Unk.
I thought we could be called the 'mouldy catch'! Whaddaya think??
It's a very catchy name. Would you get a badge and monthly newsletters?.
By the way I've got less hair than brains and unfortunately, my brain aint that big .
You could smuggle me in the back door though - couldn't you Rapunzel?
There are clubs for members who are pink and fluffy
There are clubs for members who like to hug...
So can you pleeeeeeaase start a club for low-pointed, noodle-headed, un-clique-y wannabees, which is those of us
(well okay, mee) who have more hair than brains. Thankee kindly, Unk.
I thought we could be called the 'mouldy catch'! Whaddaya think??
It's a very catchy name. Would you get a badge and monthly newsletters?.
By the way I've got less hair than brains and unfortunately, my brain aint that big .
You could smuggle me in the back door though - couldn't you Rapunzel?
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Big hugs to my friend Snooze.:yh_hugs
I was most disappointed on viewing your signature block to see that you are no longer offering sage advice.
This place won't be the same without it and I strongly urge you to do what you do best Snooze.
Unc x
In the meantime folks, this may help
http://healthyherbs.about.com/
I was most disappointed on viewing your signature block to see that you are no longer offering sage advice.
This place won't be the same without it and I strongly urge you to do what you do best Snooze.
Unc x
In the meantime folks, this may help
http://healthyherbs.about.com/
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mrsK wrote: So many herbs so little time.
Do they have a herb to get the smell of stinking ashtrays off your hands after cleaning them all afternoon?
I have washed my hands a bout 20 times & they still stink
You can't hurry these things - It just takes Thyme
Do they have a herb to get the smell of stinking ashtrays off your hands after cleaning them all afternoon?
I have washed my hands a bout 20 times & they still stink
You can't hurry these things - It just takes Thyme
THE MAN WITH THE GOLDEN PUN