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Thread: My mother

  1. #21
    Senior Member Bryn Mawr's Avatar
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    Re: My mother

    Quote Originally Posted by Saffron
    I do think that she gives me money because of her conscience. I always take it too. I just think that she needs to be the one to contact me, since she hung up on me without even saying anything the last time I called her on her cell. She saw my number and ended the call without even saying anything. It was hurtful, I am still hurt. It is something she will have to deal with.
    Still trying to make excuses but are you sure it was done deliberately? Could the decline button have been knocked in her handbag without her being aware?

    It's happend to me with the 'phone in my pocket - and I've made some odd calls too when the keylock's off.

    Just a thought.

  2. #22
    SnoozeControl
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    Re: My mother

    Quote Originally Posted by Saffron
    No I don't want to say good-bye. I love her. She is just the kind of person who thinks that the entire world revolves around her. Everything that happens is about her.

    I do think that she gives me money because of her conscience. I always take it too. I just think that she needs to be the one to contact me, since she hung up on me without even saying anything the last time I called her on her cell. She saw my number and ended the call without even saying anything. It was hurtful, I am still hurt. It is something she will have to deal with.
    This doesn't make sense to me... you were angry that she wanted to send an Easter card and didn't want to accept it, yet you say you have no qualms about taking money from her.

  3. #23
    Senior Member Bez's Avatar
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    Re: My mother

    Quote Originally Posted by theia
    My mother would have preferred another son when I was born...she wasn't enamoured with having a daughter. And over the past 20 years she has had someone in her life who is, to her, the perfect daughter and all the things I'm not. I used to try and compete but I've given that up now and keep my distance. That may sound very mean, as she is in her 80s, but it was driving me crazy trying to prove to her that I was okay.
    My brother was always my Mums favourite...according to my sister, i was born to 'patch up' a rocky marriage which explained a lot of things. She did her best but wasn't ever a 'loving' Mum...no cuddles...no 'I love you'...I learned to live with it but I never stopped trying to do things to gain her approval .
    She died in hospital aged 86 and a few weeks after, I recieved a letter from her doctor saying that she said to him "tell my children i love them"...I waited 54 years to hear that.
    A smile is a window on your face to show your heart is home

  4. #24
    High Priestess of Cardis theia's Avatar
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    Re: My mother

    Quote Originally Posted by Bez
    I recieved a letter from her doctor saying that she said to him "tell my children i love them"...I waited 54 years to hear that.
    That is beautiful, Bez, thank you! I am going to see my mother tomorrow and I'm going to really try hard...not, for once, to get her approval, but just to accept her as she is...

    Live the questions now. Perhaps you will then gradually, without noticing it, live along some distant day into the answers...Rainer Maria Rilke

  5. #25
    Senior Member Bez's Avatar
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    Re: My mother

    Quote Originally Posted by theia
    That is beautiful, Bez, thank you! I am going to see my mother tomorrow and I'm going to really try hard...not, for once, to get her approval, but just to accept her as she is...

    My Mum and I had a strange relationship Theia, but she lived with me for 15 years and I saw her through heart atacks, hip replacements, cataracts, broken knee, broken arm the lot. Once she told me I wasn't a good daughter...I was broken hearted. When she died I took it very badly...it really surprised me....maybe I was sad for all the things we didn't say to each other.
    A smile is a window on your face to show your heart is home

  6. #26
    Meow! Saffron's Avatar
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    Re: My mother

    Quote Originally Posted by SnoozeControl
    This doesn't make sense to me... you were angry that she wanted to send an Easter card and didn't want to accept it, yet you say you have no qualms about taking money from her.
    Yes, because I need it. She knows this too.

  7. #27
    High Priestess of Cardis theia's Avatar
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    Re: My mother

    Quote Originally Posted by Bez
    My Mum and I had a strange relationship Theia, but she lived with me for 15 years and I saw her through heart atacks, hip replacements, cataracts, broken knee, broken arm the lot. Once she told me I wasn't a good daughter...I was broken hearted. When she died I took it very badly...it really surprised me....maybe I was sad for all the things we didn't say to each other.
    Bez, I think it can be hard for daughters sometimes...my brother has always been the favourite, like yours. But look at everything you gave to your mother..that is incredible, and heartwarming. I think our mothers know that we love them and I think they love us, deep down...it's just that other things get horribly in the way

    Live the questions now. Perhaps you will then gradually, without noticing it, live along some distant day into the answers...Rainer Maria Rilke

  8. #28
    Meow! Saffron's Avatar
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    Re: My mother

    She called me today to see how I am doing. First she called my friend at the church and asked him if I'm okay, then he told her where I was. She didn't call me. So i called her as i was stuck at a RR crossing in my car.

    We had a nice conversation. she also said that my "friend" seems to be a very nice person. I was surprised. So maybe things are looking up for me.

    I supposed to be starting a new temp assignment at a hospital this Monday.

  9. #29
    Senior Member Bez's Avatar
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    Re: My mother

    Quote Originally Posted by Saffron
    She called me today to see how I am doing. First she called my friend at the church and asked him if I'm okay, then he told her where I was. She didn't call me. So i called her as i was stuck at a RR crossing in my car.

    We had a nice conversation. she also said that my "friend" seems to be a very nice person. I was surprised. So maybe things are looking up for me.

    I supposed to be starting a new temp assignment at a hospital this Monday.
    I'm glad to hear this saffron...there's no telling if it will turn out the way you hope for, but at least it's a little step forward. You'll probably hit more brick walls as you go on, but just get out your 'climbing gear' or find another path round it....good luck ....xxx
    A smile is a window on your face to show your heart is home

  10. #30
    mrsK
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    Re: My mother

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    Just remember Saffron,because we are parents that doesn't make us perfect.
    I hope you & your Mum can work things out.
    My Mum has just been for a visit over Easter,I saw her for the first time in two years & realized she is an old woman now it hit home this time that she won't be with me much longer nor will my Dad.
    The visit was a bitter sweet one

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