Lost the love of my life yesterday

rach07 · Post by **rach07** » Sun Oct 26, 2008 2:44 pm

Yesterday I broke up with my partner of 2 and a half years, after months of arguing. How is it possible to love someone SO much and be unable to live with them?:-1 I have hardly stopped crying since, I know we cannot be together but I miss him too much

-1:-1

el guapo · Post by **el guapo** » Sun Oct 26, 2008 2:45 pm

rach07;1035712 wrote: Yesterday I broke up with my partner of 2 and a half years, after months of arguing. How is it possible to love someone SO much and be unable to live with them?:-1 I have hardly stopped crying since, I know we cannot be together but I miss him too much

-1:-1

rach it takes time

ya will carry on

hoxtonchris · Post by **hoxtonchris** » Sun Oct 26, 2008 2:49 pm

in time you will reach a stage where you will ask yourself ,"if i could have him back would i?"and the answer will be no!i think we stay in love with the romantic ideal of that person by subconsious choice.you will meet another and eventualy the memory will fade ,it may not die but it will grow vague , good luck

Odie · Post by **Odie** » Sun Oct 26, 2008 3:00 pm

hoxtonchris;1035723 wrote: in time you will reach a stage where you will ask yourself ,"if i could have him back would i?"and the answer will be no!i think we stay in love with the romantic ideal of that person by subconsious choice.you will meet another and eventualy the memory will fade ,it may not die but it will grow vague , good luck

extremely well said.................and true.

Lon · Post by **Lon** » Sun Oct 26, 2008 3:10 pm

Sorry for your loss. Drink some prune juice, it will help.

hoxtonchris · Post by **hoxtonchris** » Sun Oct 26, 2008 3:11 pm

further to my last reply to you rach my own case in point is that i also was seperated from somebody dear and meeting my carolly turned my loss around completely.she now is the love of my life and i cant see it ever being any other way so have faith and most of all hope as im sure one day you will find the happiness that i have.

along-for-the-ride · Post by **along-for-the-ride** » Sun Oct 26, 2008 3:30 pm

A broken heart is indeed painful. Many of us here have been through that experience atleast once in our lives.

Chezzie · Post by **Chezzie** » Sun Oct 26, 2008 3:40 pm

sorry to hear that Rach, emotions are still raw right now.

Believe it you guys will feel like you are living a pure hell for the first few weeks, but honestly that feeling wonâ€™t last and it will get better! You will get to a point where youâ€™ll feel like they have actually done you a favor. It is like â€˜pingâ€™â€¦and the light will come onâ€¦seriously, do you want to spend the rest of your lives with the wrong man.

It's very hard to deal with,but there is alot of good advice and friendship in these forums,especially when you are feeling lonely and depressed.:-6

hoppy · Post by **hoppy** » Sun Oct 26, 2008 4:52 pm

I usta feel like that every time I finished a fifth of JD.

qsducks · Post by **qsducks** » Sun Oct 26, 2008 5:01 pm

Met my hubs on the rebound from the guy I dated for 1 1/2 yrs about a week after I dumped him. I did want to get back with him, but after meeting J, I just knew that P was no longer in my heart and no longer a problem. P was going down the wrong road and I just was tired of his crap. Been with J for over 22 yrs.

There are more fish in the sea and you will meet the right one. Just give it time.

Violetmay · Post by **Violetmay** » Sun Oct 26, 2008 5:38 pm

It's horrible. If it's meant to work out and start again it will. If it's supposed to be this way, you'll recover in time. Just cry when you need to, and remember to breath. In the meantime we all understand and will listen to any thing you have to get off your chest.

Patsy Warnick · Post by **Patsy Warnick** » Mon Oct 27, 2008 1:03 am

You know - you'll probably love him for along time......

and in time - you'll look back & say, WHAT THE HELL WAS I THINKING..?

wasted time - wasted emotions - wasted tears.

you gain growth.

I've always, always tried when the break up approached to maintain a friendship ending.

I didn't throw anything threw the TV or out the front door, nor did I allow my mate to do so.

But, I figured I've spent sometime with this person - didn't work out to be FULL TIME, it doesn't make either one of you a BAD Person...

it's a experience - you'll work thru - with tears -not eating - lose weight

and caught the eye of a wonderful person.......

Life will move on - I remember this episode so well - I cried over 1 break up - I so thought this was so solid @ 2-3 yrs. living with him, I was @ 21 & it was his idea to beak up... of coure I cried, I didn't even see this one coming..

I mean my Dad loved this guy, and he said BYE.

About 5 months later flowers arrive - and flowers arrive

no Thank You - I had a mind set that no one would ever have me feel like this ever again....

Now, I'm so glad I got rid of him... it's all in time my dear, it's growth, strength, life.

He's not the Love of our life - right now you may think that - it's not...

he did you a FAVOR.... Honest ,,, yeh...!!

Patsy

mikeinie · Post by **mikeinie** » Mon Oct 27, 2008 1:51 am

I am sorry that it did not work out, any break up is an experience of loss, and it will take time to get over it.

Loving someone and being able to live with someone you love are two different things; I would say that in my life there are 3 women that I truly loved, and in my heart still do, but it could never work out relationship wise. Fortunately I met and married the one I could have both with.

Hang in there, donâ€™t feel bad for loving the guy, and donâ€™t try to stop feeling love for him, just realize that you are not meant to be together.

Milly · Post by **Milly** » Mon Oct 27, 2008 1:56 am

rach07;1035712 wrote: Yesterday I broke up with my partner of 2 and a half years, after months of arguing. How is it possible to love someone SO much and be unable to live with them?:-1 I have hardly stopped crying since, I know we cannot be together but I miss him too much

-1:-1

I know nothing I say will make you feel any better hun, so I wont....

If you makes you feel better to talk things through here, then you do just that hunny.... and welcome to The Forum Garden :-6

rach07 · Post by **rach07** » Mon Oct 27, 2008 11:52 am

Thank you so much for all the replies and your kind words. He called me at 2 am begging me to take him back and try again but I told him no. Broke my heart to do that but I know deep down that it is the right thing to do. doesn't make me feel any better now but I have been told, and I have to believe it that it will in time. I really appreciate you all taking the time to reply to a complete stranger. Thank you xx

Post by **Betty Boop** » Mon Oct 27, 2008 12:00 pm

rach07;1036865 wrote: Thank you so much for all the replies and your kind words. He called me at 2 am begging me to take him back and try again but I told him no. Broke my heart to do that but I know deep down that it is the right thing to do. doesn't make me feel any better now but I have been told, and I have to believe it that it will in time. I really appreciate you all taking the time to reply to a complete stranger. Thank you xx

Stick around and become an, ummmmm non-stranger lol.

Pain hurts, we've all been there unfortunately. :-4

mikeinie · Post by **mikeinie** » Mon Oct 27, 2008 12:10 pm

rach07;1036865 wrote: Thank you so much for all the replies and your kind words. He called me at 2 am begging me to take him back and try again but I told him no. Broke my heart to do that but I know deep down that it is the right thing to do. doesn't make me feel any better now but I have been told, and I have to believe it that it will in time. I really appreciate you all taking the time to reply to a complete stranger. Thank you xx

Good Luck.

Chezzie · Post by **Chezzie** » Mon Oct 27, 2008 1:04 pm

rach07;1036865 wrote: Thank you so much for all the replies and your kind words. He called me at 2 am begging me to take him back and try again but I told him no. Broke my heart to do that but I know deep down that it is the right thing to do. doesn't make me feel any better now but I have been told, and I have to believe it that it will in time. I really appreciate you all taking the time to reply to a complete stranger. Thank you xx

Glad we may of helped in some way Rach.

Good Luck:-6

rach07 · Post by **rach07** » Mon Oct 27, 2008 2:54 pm

Chezzie;1036933 wrote: Glad we may of helped in some way Rach.

Good Luck:-6

You have helped ALOT!!! Have just been out for a meal and drink with my best mate which also helped!! He sent me a nice text to remind me about something on TV that I like, I sent him aa polite reply...made me miss him even more!!

Patsy Warnick · Post by **Patsy Warnick** » Mon Oct 27, 2008 10:17 pm

Rach

Saying NO - you've done the right thing - may not be the easiedt thing to do, but it's the right choice here. Remember - he said HE didn't feel the same & needed to move on. so dude move on

He tried to move on - perhaps this OTHER female he lust for turned him away, so hey, I'll call Rach she'll take me back, since I just devistated her....He did this once - he'll do it again - always say NO..

don't waste your time with this guy.

be happy - make happy choices for yourself

Good Luck - be happy

Patsy

weeder · Post by **weeder** » Tue Oct 28, 2008 3:08 am

Life is an incredible adventure. If we never feel pain, we cannott appreciate joy. ( The Road Less Traveled) 9 years ago, I broke up with the man I totally changed my life for. Loved him from a distance for years. We lived together for 6 years. I pretty much had a nervous breakdown over it. The pain was excruciating. Nowdays I drive down the road singing " Oh Thank You God!!

that you didnt give me back what I thought I wanted. You will be ok, it just takes time. And you never know what is waiting for you around the next corner. The most important thing is to make the experience a learning experience, which I know you will. Stories to be shared at a later date.

rach07 · Post by **rach07** » Tue Oct 28, 2008 12:39 pm

The thing is he did not cheat on me or leave me for anyone else, we just kept arguing. That makes it even harder because I can't hate him. We both said some nasty things but I still love him. Today I was not too bad until a show came n TV that we used to watch together, then I just felt really awful and missed him even more. I am just trying to keep busy and am lucky to have a great family and friends. Once again, thanks for the support and advice.

motherof3 · Post by **motherof3** » Sun Nov 23, 2008 9:10 am

First of all let me say that i am sorry to hear that. I have been there only i was with the man for 8 years. We argued alot but for a long time the good times outweighed the bad.

But even though it got real bad at the end; he would not work, would not pay bills, or even buy food, i still to this day love him.

Hon you never get over loving someone. You never just quite loving them you just learn to go on with life without them. I continue to pray for my ex hoping one day that he will change.

The way I learned to put him in the back of my mind and start living my life again is by doing things that i did not get to do when i was with him. Like watch my favorite tv show, eat my favorite foods, or just hang out with friends.

Another good way is to write down how you feel. Dont send it to him just write it down. Like a journal or something. Write down what you miss about him, and what went wrong on either side .

hope this helps hon

God Bless You

mikeinie · Post by **mikeinie** » Mon Nov 24, 2008 3:51 am

Sometimes we feel that there needs to be a big dramatic ending to relationships, like cheating, or walking out, or abuse, but sometimes the facts are that it is just not meant to be. It is almost easier for the other reasons that you can have a firm tangible excuse for the relationship ending, but probably most of the time the reasons are no so tangible, or easy to explain. Sometimes, it is just not meant to be.

It is OK to still feel for him, and miss him, but in the end if you were arguing all the time, the reality is that the relationship just does not work, and the things that you like about each other cannot overcome the issues between you.

Stay true, move on, and find real happiness. :-6

usernew · Post by **usernew** » Fri May 29, 2009 4:21 am

I know rach it is difficult for you to forget her. Its not only happened to you it also happened with me. But after sometime I found every thing is fine. Its true"Time heals all wounds".