Is Cyber Sex Adultery?

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Lon
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Is Cyber Sex Adultery?

Post by Lon »

fuzzy butt;1035964 wrote: And how do people justify it as Adultery?

the reason I ask this is I've just found out someone had (not related to me) cyber sex text saved to their computer .................Now the excuse from the said husband was "I didn't respond to this person I just saved it" . Now does that then turn the cyber sex into pornography literture?


Pornography for most normal adults and teens is nothing more than curiosity.

How do others do it? It's when it become an obsession, a daily consuming activity and the correspondence with others on pornographic sites that it can become dangerous to any relationship. Adultery??? That's a bit of a stretch.
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Lon
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Is Cyber Sex Adultery?

Post by Lon »

fuzzy butt;1035973 wrote: But the cyber was sent to this person by the author.....................doesn't that mean there is a sort of relationship going on there?


No more than someone saying that you and I are having a physical relationship.
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Is Cyber Sex Adultery?

Post by spot »

fuzzy butt;1035973 wrote: But the cyber was sent to this person by the author.....................doesn't that mean there is a sort of relationship going on there?


There's a tutorial someplace for beginners, it has around a thousand lines of copy/paste endearments graded from gentle glow to explosive throb. If I remember right it's called "Help! That Woman I Had Cybersex With Is Really a Man!", I'm sure that ought to be enough to find it. But. - my point - with a page like that on the internet there can't be anything in the saved text that would titillate by comparison. The only reason for saving the message in question would be to go back and work out why it had been sent at a later date, in which case it was presumably unsolicited from a relative stranger.
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koan
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Is Cyber Sex Adultery?

Post by koan »

It's a chance to explore where one's heart really stands. If someone indulges in cybersex while married and decides that they don't want to meet the other person then they discover that they are still attached to their marriage. If the person decides to try and meet the cybersex buddy then the problems in the marriage are severe. Either way, the discovery that the marriage is dysfunctional is an important one. Trying cybersex if a person finds him/herself tempted is a good way to explore their feelings and a lot less dangerous than secretly dating someone in person. Shoving the temptation away means it remains hidden inside, most likely festering.
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Is Cyber Sex Adultery?

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Is Cyber Sex Adultery?

Post by Patsy Warnick »

YES....

I say yes, if you have a question - ask your mate.

If one is spending alot of time on this cyber sex - there's a problem.

I've never looked - inquired ..?

Have you? OK, then - I don't think my mate would appreciate it..?

I wouldn't appreciate it.

Just ask me - will talk.. and if you don't have open communication - then you really don't have much of a relationship....?

Cyber Sex is no more than a pick up - being available..

yes - adultery - so why look, somethings wrong if you need to look/inquire..

Patsy
mikeinie
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Is Cyber Sex Adultery?

Post by mikeinie »

Is it adultery?

The answer I guess is if you are keeping a secret from your partner, or if you would not want them to see it. If that is the case then there is something wrong.
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Chezzie
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Is Cyber Sex Adultery?

Post by Chezzie »

Id say yes. A little harmless flirting like we do in RL is fine but cyber sex or engaging in intimate chats in secrecy is cheating. If your being dishonest and lying and covering your tracks, you know what your doing is wrong and therefore your cheating on your partner.

Here’s the thing the idea of my hubby being physical with someone, or the idea of him becoming emotionally involved with someone, and i'd say that the latter is far worse. Many can forgive, for example, a one night stand sort of fling, where it’s just meaningless sex, but few can as easily brush off an emotional involvement with another woman or man. Emotional involvements take more than time away from the marriage; emotional involvements take attention away from the marriage. Instead of focusing on working on the marriage, the spouse who is emotionally involved with someone else finds their feelings and attention focused on the person with whom they are having the affair. While they may still be at home physically, they have emotionally checked out of the marriage.
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CARLA
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Is Cyber Sex Adultery?

Post by CARLA »

YES..!! Your married pretty simple to me doesn't matter if its on the internet or in a hotel room your breaking your vows. There are no gray areas in those vows in my mind that's why it is called marriage.
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sunny104
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Is Cyber Sex Adultery?

Post by sunny104 »

I don't know how I would define it but it is wrong. If you wouldn't do it in front of your spouse or if you would be hurt to find out that they were doing it to you then it's wrong. Would you talk to someone other than your spouse in an explicit sexual nature in person? Doing it online doesn't make it any more acceptable. But I'm old fashioned like that.
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Post by el guapo »

not if you dont inhale
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Betty Boop
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Is Cyber Sex Adultery?

Post by Betty Boop »

Yes it is, in my opinion.
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flopstock
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Post by flopstock »

No more then reading porn is, IMO.



Folks have started to view the internet as reality, it isn't. It may be the best you can get at the moment, but it isn't real.



A vibrator or blowup doll is more real, you actually touch them... well not after the last guy..:rolleyes:, but having artificial sex is having artificial sex and deserves at best artificial punishment...:thinking:
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Betty Boop
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Is Cyber Sex Adultery?

Post by Betty Boop »

flopstock;1036880 wrote: No more then reading porn is, IMO.



Folks have started to view the internet as reality, it isn't. It may be the best you can get at the moment, but it isn't real.



A vibrator or blowup doll is more real, you actually touch them... well not after the last guy..:rolleyes:, but having artificial sex is having artificial sex and deserves at best artificial punishment...:thinking:


I can see your point, but sitting there reading a mag or indeed reading off the computer screen is just you and well, fiction.

Cyber sex involves communicating and making a connection with another real person, its not just 'a computer screen' at that point. And don't forget these people often progress to web-cams, so is that artificial too?
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Post by flopstock »

Betty Boop;1036887 wrote: I can see your point, but sitting there reading a mag or indeed reading off the computer screen is just you and well, fiction.

Cyber sex involves communicating and making a connection with another real person, its not just 'a computer screen' at that point. And don't forget these people often progress to web-cams, so is that artificial too?


Quite obviously you frequent classier sites then I do..... so far as I have been able to determine, most of the communication that goes on involves guys popping up and telling the women they are having trouble making their new cam work, would we mind letting them know if we can see them... I love smooth guys, don't you?:D



In any case, not the kind of relationship building required for adultry, IMO.:rolleyes:
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Is Cyber Sex Adultery?

Post by Betty Boop »

flopstock;1036898 wrote: Quite obviously you frequent classier sites then I do..... so far as I have been able to determine, most of the communication that goes on involves guys popping up and telling the women they are having trouble making their new cam work, would we mind letting them know if we can see them... I love smooth guys, don't you?:D



In any case, not the kind of relationship building required for adultry, IMO.:rolleyes:


lol thanks for implying I visit these sites :wah: I don't, but I do know someone that does, and I know what goes on and IMO that constitutes playing away from home, but then I'm not good with jealousy personally.

And yes Floppy... I do love smooth guys ;):D
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Chezzie
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Post by Chezzie »

Betty Boop;1036920 wrote: lol thanks for implying I visit these sites :wah: I don't, but I do know someone that does, and I know what goes on and IMO that constitutes playing away from home, but then I'm not good with jealousy personally.

And yes Floppy... I do love smooth guys ;):D


are you talking dating sites or cyber sex sites:-3:-3:-3
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Post by Betty Boop »

Chezzie;1036921 wrote: are you talking dating sites or cyber sex sites:-3:-3:-3


Cyber sex sites, some dating sites go that far too.

I have a friend that caught her partner advertising on a dating site. I've found someone on a dating site. To me and to her, because the 'intent' was there they were guilty.
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Post by Chezzie »

Betty Boop;1036927 wrote: Cyber sex sites, some dating sites go that far too.

I have a friend that caught her partner advertising on a dating site. I've found someone on a dating site. To me and to her, because the 'intent' was there they were guilty.


I agree bb.

Didnt know their were "actual" cyber sex sites:-3:-3 How does that work? All text or web cabs:rolleyes::rolleyes::D
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Post by Betty Boop »

Chezzie;1036939 wrote: I agree bb.

Didnt know their were "actual" cyber sex sites:-3:-3 How does that work? All text or web cabs:rolleyes::rolleyes::D


Whatever way you want, just text or you can upgrade to watch others films and submit your own. You can also watch 'live' webcams and partake with your own webcam.

To my mind, the 'relationship' as we currently know it is doomed. :(
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Post by Chezzie »

Betty Boop;1036946 wrote: Whatever way you want, just text or you can upgrade to watch others films and submit your own. You can also watch 'live' webcams and partake with your own webcam.

To my mind, the 'relationship' as we currently know it is doomed. :(


bloody hell:-3:-3:-3
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Post by Betty Boop »

fuzzy butt;1036960 wrote:



almost spilt me coffee when I read that . Which would have entailed me going back to the kitchen and stubbing my toe again .:wah::wah::wah:


Go on, you know you want to, mines black no sugar whilst you're there ;):wah::wah:
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Post by Betty Boop »

Chezzie;1036967 wrote: bloody hell:-3:-3:-3


Yup, scary huh. :(
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Post by Chezzie »

Betty Boop;1036973 wrote: Yup, scary huh. :(


How do people find out these places exist...Are they like add ons off dating sites?
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Post by flopstock »

Chezzie;1036978 wrote: How do people find out these places exist...Are they like add ons off dating sites?


Act all innocent chezzie..:p:wah: just teasing!!!:wah:



actually, it's as simple as going on a dating site, someone interests you so you start emailing, then you head to IM, then the really classy ones throw in the bit about seeing if their cam works.... :rolleyes:

try it, trust me, they'll find you...:D
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Post by Chezzie »

flopstock;1036989 wrote: Act all innocent chezzie..:p:wah: just teasing!!!:wah:



actually, it's as simple as going on a dating site, someone interests you so you start emailing, then you head to IM, then the really classy ones throw in the bit about seeing if their cam works.... :rolleyes:

try it, trust me, they'll find you...:D


nah im happily married chick. I dont own a web cam either:wah::wah::wah:

Mind you, just filed hubbys vat return and it was a biggie which put him in a bad mood and I was trying to cheer him up and he says if you want to cheer me up, get a job that pays £1000 a week, I says where am I gonna find a job like that, he said:rolleyes: install a webcam:rolleyes: cheeky git!:wah::wah::wah:
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Chezzie
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Post by Chezzie »

I just picture a lot of desperate w*nkers:lips::lips:
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Post by flopstock »

I'm pretty much the only person I know who has no problem admitting I've joined dating sites and yet they have millions and millions of members...





go figure..:wah:



what's really entertaining is that you hit eharmony or one of the other family ones and you'll see guys with the most wholesome profiles... get down to the more earthy ones and the same photos are there with guys looking for something else entirely...



And here's a tip::yh_idea it's apparently not a good idea to be willing to admit that you are only interested in guys that have not given up sex entirely...:rolleyes:
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Post by flopstock »

Chezzie;1037018 wrote: I just picture a lot of desperate w*nkers:lips::lips:


it's like going to a cyber bar or social actually. there are some really nice folks and some real eye openers...:D



you haven't lived though until you agree to meet for appetizers with a guy who describes himself as just under 6' and you can rest your chin on the top of his head...



I politely asked WTF? He insisted he was 5'10''... I'm 5'3''...you do the math...:wah:



It's been quite a while for me, come to think on it....something to think about I suppose...:sneaky:
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Post by Chezzie »

flopstock;1037042 wrote: it's like going to a cyber bar or social actually. there are some really nice folks and some real eye openers...:D



you haven't lived though until you agree to meet for appetizers with a guy who describes himself as just under 6' and you can rest your chin on the top of his head...



I politely asked WTF? He insisted he was 5'10''... I'm 5'3''...you do the math...:wah:



It's been quite a while for me, come to think on it....something to think about I suppose...:sneaky:


Oh I think the dating sites are fine and no different that meeting peeps in a bar etc as you never know them till that night usually. Its the cyber sex ones I find a little weird but hey each to their own and Im lucky cos im happily married and getting mine lol....If your lonely and its enriching your life to have cyber sex who am I to say anything:D
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Post by flopstock »

Chezzie;1037057 wrote: Oh I think the dating sites are fine and no different that meeting peeps in a bar etc as you never know them till that night usually. Its the cyber sex ones I find a little weird but hey each to their own and Im lucky cos im happily married and getting mine lol....If your lonely and its enriching your life to have cyber sex who am I to say anything:D


That's the problem chez... you go to dating sites and next thing you know a fellow is offering himself up when all you wanted to know was what kind of car he drives...if he has pets... takes mom out for supper from time to time... those are all code questions that really mean, whip it out and entertain me please...:rolleyes::D
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Post by Chezzie »

fuzzy butt;1037138 wrote: hmmm you see if i was after something in particular on these sites I would make it obvious.all I would put in my profile would be this verse.

Strawberries, cherries and an angels kiss in spring,

My summer wine is really made from all these things.

Take off your silver spurs and help me pass the time

and I will give to you, my summer wine.



:wah::wah::wah: See? not tacky but straight to the point!!!


did you say not tacky???? vomit worthy is that:wah::wah::wah:
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Chezzie
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Post by Chezzie »

fuzzy butt;1037147 wrote: :wah: wow chezzie that took 6.8 seconds to respond i'm impressed!!!!:wah::wah:


hah hah and I have 2 other windows open:D:D:D:D:D

Fast Fingered Chezzie:wah::wah::wah:
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Post by el guapo »

Chezzie;1037018 wrote: I just picture a lot of desperate w*nkers:lips::lips:


ya called
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Post by Pheasy »

spot;1035979 wrote: There's a tutorial someplace for beginners, it has around a thousand lines of copy/paste endearments graded from gentle glow to explosive throb. If I remember right it's called "Help! That Woman I Had Cybersex With Is Really a Man!", I'm sure that ought to be enough to find it. But. - my point - with a page like that on the internet there can't be anything in the saved text that would titillate by comparison. The only reason for saving the message in question would be to go back and work out why it had been sent at a later date, in which case it was presumably unsolicited from a relative stranger.


:yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl
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Chezzie
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Post by Chezzie »

Pheasy;1037843 wrote: :yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl


did you get a gentle glow Pheasy or an explosive throb?:wah::wah::wah::wah:
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Post by Kindle »

fuzzy butt;1035964 wrote: And how do people justify it as Adultery?

the reason I ask this is I've just found out someone had (not related to me) cyber sex text saved to their computer .................Now the excuse from the said husband was "I didn't respond to this person I just saved it" . Now does that then turn the cyber sex into pornography literture?


According to the dictionary (and I grant you mine is very old) cyber sex does not meet the criteria for adultery.

But as my dictionary is so old, there probably is a new word (one that I do not know) that classifies this as something very similar to adultery, but ONLY if one party is married and the other person is not their legal mate. :rolleyes:




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Post by Peg »

mikeinie;1036105 wrote: Is it adultery?

The answer I guess is if you are keeping a secret from your partner, or if you would not want them to see it. If that is the case then there is something wrong.


Sorry I didn't see this before, but this is the best post I've read in a long, long time.
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Post by davemorkal »

interested post...can be read again and again. we pushed topic back and started to enjoy the topic. Yahoo Rotfl
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Post by scarletgirl44 »

For me its NOT, and i DONT see it as such !!! being if im engaging in cyber sex then its NOT REAL sex & im STILL being faithful to me partner so wheres the issue, meaning if i were to engage in cyber sex with say a midget, for example, how am i cheating on my partner?? she have & will ALWAYS have my HEART & LOVE, so if its cyber wheres the harm ?? NOW that provided you DONT see one another either, if your looking at one another NAKED then ALL bets are OFF !! and it most certainly falls into a REAL gray area !! of whic id try my BEST to stay aways from being its WAY too tempting to take in in the WRONG directions & eeling WILL get hurt for sure .

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