Death an Honor in Turkey

rainbowsmiles · Post by **rainbowsmiles** » Sun Jul 16, 2006 3:12 pm

I understand most things about other cultures. I understand their differences and don't think we or anyone else should interfere, but this story is truly beyond comprehension. I have a friend who is Turkish and still lives in Istanbul and her family doesn't have the following beliefs. So it can't be a cultural thing - can it? This is just sad and in most cases I refrain from sharing my opinion because each country has their ways but this is just outrageous:

BATMAN, Turkey (July 16) -- For Derya, a waiflike girl of 17, the order to kill herself came from an uncle and was delivered in a text message to her cellphone. “You have blackened our name, it read. “Kill yourself and clean our shame or we will kill you first.

Derya said her crime was to fall for a boy she had met at school last spring. She knew the risks: her aunt had been killed by her grandfather for seeing a boy. But after being cloistered and veiled for most of her life, she said, she felt free for the first time and wanted to express her independence.

When news of the love affair spread to her family, she said, her mother warned her that her father would kill her. But she refused to listen. Then came the threatening text messages, sent by her brothers and uncles, sometimes 15 a day. Derya said they were the equivalent of a death sentence.

Consumed by shame and fearing for her life, she said, she decided to carry out her family’s wishes. First, she said, she jumped into the Tigris River, but she survived. Next she tried hanging herself, but an uncle cut her down. Then she slashed her wrists with a kitchen knife.

“My family attacked my personality, and I felt I had committed the biggest sin in the world, she said recently from a women’s shelter where she had traded in her veil for a T-shirt and jeans. She declined to give her last name for fear that her family was still hunting her. “I felt I had no right to dishonor my family, that I have no right to be alive. So I decided to respect my family’s desire and to die.

Every few weeks in Batman and the surrounding area in southeast Anatolia, which is poor, rural and deeply influenced by conservative Islam, a young woman tries to take her life. Others have been stoned to death, strangled, shot or buried alive. Their offenses ranged from stealing a glance at a boy to wearing a short skirt, wanting to go to the movies, being raped by a stranger or relative or having consensual sex.

Hoping to join the European Union, Turkey has tightened the punishment for attacks on women and girls who have had such experiences. But the violence has continued, if by different means: parents are trying to spare their sons from the harsh punishments associated with killing their sisters by pressing the daughters to take their own lives instead.

“Families of disgraced girls are choosing between sacrificing a son to a life in prison by designating him to kill his sister or forcing their daughters to kill themselves, said Yilmaz Akinci, who works for a rural development group. “Rather than losing two children, most opt for the latter option.

Women’s groups here say the evidence suggests that a growing number of girls considered to be dishonored are being locked in a room for days with rat poison, a pistol or a rope, and told by their families that the only thing resting between their disgrace and redemption is death.

Batman (pronounced bot-MON) is a grim and dusty city of 250,000 people where religion is clashing with Turkey’s official secularism. The city was featured in the latest novel by the Turkish writer Orhan Pamuk, “Snow, which chronicled a journalist’s investigation of a suicide epidemic among teenage girls.

In the past six years, there have been 165 suicides or suicide attempts in Batman, 102 of them by women. As many as 36 women have killed themselves since the start of this year, according to the United Nations. The organization estimates that 5,000 women are killed each year around the world by relatives who accuse them of bringing dishonor on their families; the majority of the killings are in the Middle East.

Last month, the United Nations dispatched a special envoy to Turkey to investigate. The envoy, Yakin Erturk, concluded that while some suicides were authentic, others appeared to be “honor killings disguised as a suicide or an accident.

“The calls keep coming, said Mehtap Ceylan, a member of Batman’s suicide prevention squad. She said she had very recently received a call about a 16-year-old girl who had committed suicide, her family said, because they would not let her wear jeans. But when Ms. Ceylan visited the house, neighbors told her the girl had been a happy person and had been wearing jeans for years.

“The story just doesn’t add up, Ms. Ceylan said. “The girl’s family says their daughter was eating breakfast, walked into the next room and put a gun to her head. They were acting as if nothing had happened.

chonsigirl · Post by **chonsigirl** » Sun Jul 16, 2006 3:27 pm

This is sad, that family pressure would go whacko like this!:(

annabelle · Post by **annabelle** » Sun Jul 16, 2006 3:33 pm

According to the Koran, it is against the rules of Islam to take a life!. This is just further proof what a bunch of hypocritical b******s some Muslims are!!!!

rainbowsmiles · Post by **rainbowsmiles** » Sun Jul 16, 2006 4:49 pm

These groups must be some type of throw-off to the Muslim faith. Every Muslim I know is against suicide. I guess there are fanatics everywhere

But these people take the cake. I can't understand wanting to kill your own child or convincing them to kill themselves. It makes all the disfunctional families I know seem like angels.

Lulu2 · Post by **Lulu2** » Sun Jul 16, 2006 7:36 pm

"Honor killings" are very common in the Muslim world...not just in Turkey.

"Kitchen fires" are also very common in India. A man's family will kill the wife, keep her dowry and make him available to take another bride/dowry.

"Female circumcision" (a nice little euphemism for genital mutilation) is also widely practiced in much of the middle east and Africa. Rape, torture and murder happen every day in Sudan/Darfur and Somalia.

As Oprah Winfrey said once, "The world is not a safe place for a girl child."

annabelle · Post by **annabelle** » Thu Jul 20, 2006 6:20 am

onsekiz wrote:

It is not about religion it is about ignorance. It's not their fault, it's a fault of Turkish government. It's a product of ignoring Kurdish people.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kurdistan

The only thing the Turkish government is guilty of is NOT doing anything to stop these barbaric atrocities.

Stop making excuses for these people, just because they don't happen to like the way thing's are for them politically is NO EXCUSE to murder their daughter's/ sister's etc, simply because they might dare to even look at a man, or indeed just for having an opinion. Thank God I was born into a relatively civilised society.

I've never read such utter bulls**t!

Bez · Post by **Bez** » Thu Jul 20, 2006 1:40 pm

onsekiz wrote: In fact they call themselves Kurdish. Man marrying multiple women is popular at their society. They are not well educated. They live in a feodal system. There are "aga"s who leads tribe-like societies. They mostly speak Kurdish with each other.

I love Kurdish people, i love their culture, food, even sound of their language. I have great Kurdish friends. They're so friendly, generous, naive.

But I think that they are kind of orphaned by the Turkish goverment (that's a subjective view).

Imagine immigrant people in USA. Not the same situation but looks smiliar.

And these people have very bad traditions about women. Honor killing occurs at south eastern Turkey. Turkey is a %99 muslim country but no honor killing happens except Kurdish area.

It is not about religion it is about ignorance. It's not their fault, it's a fault of Turkish government. It's a product of ignoring Kurdish people.

This area

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kurdistan

It's good to have input from somone who has FIRST HAND knowledge....thank you onsekiz

annabelle · Post by **annabelle** » Thu Jul 20, 2006 2:22 pm

Turkish men in general treat their women appalingly, and that is FIRST HAND knowledge as I have lived there.

Lulu2 · Post by **Lulu2** » Thu Jul 20, 2006 7:45 pm

I love Kurdish people, i love their culture, food, even sound of their language. I have great Kurdish friends. They're so friendly, generous.

++++++++++++++++ Me, too! What lovely things they do with vegetables!

But I think that they are kind of orphaned by the Turkish goverment (that's a subjective view).

(YOUR OPINION)

Imagine immigrant people in USA. Not the same situation but looks smiliar.

And these people have very bad traditions about women. Honor killing occurs at south eastern Turkey. Turkey is a %99 muslim country but no honor killing happens except Kurdish area.

It is not about religion it is about ignorance. It's not their fault, it's a fault of Turkish government. It's a product of ignoring Kurdish people

+++++++++++++++++ Pardon me, dear heart....but this is NOT a fault of the Turkish governement or even the non-fundamental government.

Here're true facts.....fundamental Islam wants to keep women at their knees.

Without votes or influence, or even political influence....

++++++++++++++++ And so it shall be...while they manipulate the situtations....