Summary of Life

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minks
Posts: 26281
Joined: Mon Dec 13, 2004 1:58 pm

Summary of Life

Post by minks »

GREAT TRUTHS THAT LITTLE CHILDREN HAVE LEARNED:

1) No matter how hard you try, you can't baptise cats.

2) When your Mum is mad at your Dad , don't let her brush your hair.

3) If your sister hits you, don't hit her back. They always catch the second person.

4) Never ask your 3-year old brother to hold a tomato.

5) You can't trust dogs to watch your food.

6) Don't sneeze when someone is cutting your hair.

7) Never hold a Dust-Buster and a cat at the same time.

8) You can't hide a piece of broccoli in a glass of milk.

9) Don't wear polka-dot underwear under white shorts.

10) The best place to be when you're sad is Grandpa's lap.





GREAT TRUTHS THAT ADULTS HAVE LEARNED:

1) Raising teenagers is like nailing jelly to a tree.

2) Wrinkles don't hurt.

3) Families are like fudge...mostly sweet, with a few nuts.

4) Today's mighty oak is just yesterday's nut that held its ground.

5) Laughing is good exercise. It's like jogging on the inside.

6) Middle age is when you choose your cereal for the fiber, not the toy.







GREAT TRUTHS ABOUT GROWING OLD

1) Growing old is mandatory; growing up is optional.

2) Forget the health food. I need all the preservatives I can get.

3) When you fall down, you wonder what else you can do while you're down there.

4) You're getting old when you get the same sensation from a rocking chair that you

once got from a roller coaster.

5) It's frustrating when you know all the answers but nobody bothers to ask you the questions.

6) Time may be a great healer, but it's a lousy beautician.

7) Wisdom comes with age, but sometimes age comes alone.





THE FOUR STAGES OF LIFE:

1) You believe in Santa Claus.

2) You don't believe in Santa Claus.

3) You are Santa Claus.

4) You look like Santa Claus.





SUCCESS:

At age 4 success is . . . not piddling in your pants.

At age 12 success is . . . having friends.

At age 17 success is . having a drivers license.

At age 35 success is . . having money.

At age 50 success is . . . having money.

At age 70 success is . ... having a drivers license.

At age 75 success is . . . having friends.

At age 80 success is . . . not piddling in your pants.



Always remember to forget the troubles that pass your way;

BUT NEVER forget the blessings that come each day.



Have a wonderful day with many *smiles*



Take the time to live!!!

Life is too short. Dance naked
�You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough.�

― Mae West
User avatar
kazalala
Posts: 13036
Joined: Thu Apr 05, 2007 6:00 am

Summary of Life

Post by kazalala »

minks;625738 wrote: GREAT TRUTHS THAT LITTLE CHILDREN HAVE LEARNED:

1) No matter how hard you try, you can't baptise cats.

2) When your Mum is mad at your Dad , don't let her brush your hair.

3) If your sister hits you, don't hit her back. They always catch the second person.

4) Never ask your 3-year old brother to hold a tomato.

5) You can't trust dogs to watch your food.

6) Don't sneeze when someone is cutting your hair.

7) Never hold a Dust-Buster and a cat at the same time.

8) You can't hide a piece of broccoli in a glass of milk.

9) Don't wear polka-dot underwear under white shorts.

10) The best place to be when you're sad is Grandpa's lap.





GREAT TRUTHS THAT ADULTS HAVE LEARNED:

1) Raising teenagers is like nailing jelly to a tree.

2) Wrinkles don't hurt.

3) Families are like fudge...mostly sweet, with a few nuts.

4) Today's mighty oak is just yesterday's nut that held its ground.

5) Laughing is good exercise. It's like jogging on the inside.

6) Middle age is when you choose your cereal for the fiber, not the toy.







GREAT TRUTHS ABOUT GROWING OLD

1) Growing old is mandatory; growing up is optional.

2) Forget the health food. I need all the preservatives I can get.

3) When you fall down, you wonder what else you can do while you're down there.

4) You're getting old when you get the same sensation from a rocking chair that you

once got from a roller coaster.

5) It's frustrating when you know all the answers but nobody bothers to ask you the questions.

6) Time may be a great healer, but it's a lousy beautician.

7) Wisdom comes with age, but sometimes age comes alone.





THE FOUR STAGES OF LIFE:

1) You believe in Santa Claus.

2) You don't believe in Santa Claus.

3) You are Santa Claus.

4) You look like Santa Claus.





SUCCESS:

At age 4 success is . . . not piddling in your pants.

At age 12 success is . . . having friends.

At age 17 success is . having a drivers license.

At age 35 success is . . having money.

At age 50 success is . . . having money.

At age 70 success is . ... having a drivers license.

At age 75 success is . . . having friends.

At age 80 success is . . . not piddling in your pants.



Always remember to forget the troubles that pass your way;

BUT NEVER forget the blessings that come each day.



Have a wonderful day with many *smiles*



Take the time to live!!!

Life is too short. Dance naked


Excellent Minks!!!:yh_rotfl :yh_rotfl :-4




FOC THREAD PART1

In the end, we will remember not the words of our enemies, but the silence of our friends.

Martin Luther King Jr.
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sunny104
Posts: 11986
Joined: Wed Jan 18, 2006 9:25 am

Summary of Life

Post by sunny104 »

so true! :wah: :-6
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guppy
Posts: 6793
Joined: Sun May 14, 2006 5:49 pm

Summary of Life

Post by guppy »

i love this!!!! its sooooooooooooooooo cute and true and funny..do you mind if i swipe it and post it somewhere else?:wah: :wah: :wah:
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YZGI
Posts: 11527
Joined: Thu Apr 06, 2006 11:24 am

Summary of Life

Post by YZGI »

guppy;625784 wrote: i love this!!!! its sooooooooooooooooo cute and true and funny..do you mind if i swipe it and post it somewhere else?:wah: :wah: :wah:


Hey Gupps, isn't it spawning time for you?
User avatar
minks
Posts: 26281
Joined: Mon Dec 13, 2004 1:58 pm

Summary of Life

Post by minks »

guppy;625784 wrote: i love this!!!! its sooooooooooooooooo cute and true and funny..do you mind if i swipe it and post it somewhere else?:wah: :wah: :wah:


nope post away. I don't mind.
�You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough.�

― Mae West
littlemissgiggle
Posts: 2345
Joined: Fri May 04, 2007 1:27 pm

Summary of Life

Post by littlemissgiggle »

that was fantastic :wah:

can i copy it too

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