If You Could Change Something ......

Pheasy · Post by **Pheasy** » Sun Mar 30, 2008 5:26 am

in your life ..... like decisions you made, or things you allowed to happen .... what would it be?

I don't mean things that happened to you as a child. Like, there are things that happened in my childhood that I don't think I had any control over, so really could not of changed. I mean decisions/circumstances that you could of changed.

I have thought about this long and hard ... its not as easy than I thought. :wah:

I think ..... I would not of allowed moving to the USA to affect my life so much. That I can change. So I guess it is a worthwhile exercise. So I figured maybe if others took a moment to do this, that maybe they could also change something they do not like right now. :-4:-4 We sometimes get so caught up in dealing with life, that we don't have time to start thinking about how (if need be) we could change it.

Nomad · Post by **Nomad** » Sun Mar 30, 2008 5:39 am

Do you mind if I ask how moving to the US changed your life so much ?

How long have you been here now ?

Is your husband American ?

Will you ever move back ?

Do you like it here ?

What are your dislikes ?

Whens the last time you saw your family ?

These are genuine questions, Im interested.

Pheasy · Post by **Pheasy** » Sun Mar 30, 2008 6:46 am

Nomad;820613 wrote: Do you mind if I ask how moving to the US changed your life so much ?

How long have you been here now ?

Is your husband American ?

Will you ever move back ?

Do you like it here ?

What are your dislikes ?

Whens the last time you saw your family ?

These are genuine questions, Im interested.

Maybe what I should of said is 'changed my attitude to my life' .... great question Nomad ..... this will take a little time for me to answer (more time than I have right now) ... but it will help me to be more specific about changes that need to be made. I will get back to you on this one. :-6

We have been in the USA for nearly 5 years.

My husband is British.

It is likely we will never move back to the UK.

Yes I do like it here .... I think

My dislikes

I'll get back to you on this one ... I think the answer will end up being included in my answer to the first question.

The last time I saw any of my family was 4 years ago.

:-4

Imladris · Post by **Imladris** » Sun Mar 30, 2008 11:48 am

I would have persevered and had that second child I wanted. We started trying but then things happened that meant we put our plans on hold, then when we discussed it again my hubby felt he was too old and I felt it wouldn't be fair to him to push it.

Another thing I would have done would be to have taken better care of my diet when I left home instead of eating junk and starting off my constant battle with my weight and health problems.

I sometimes wonder if I should have told a certain man in my life in my early 20's how I felt about him but then if I did I wouldn't necessarily be where I am now and all in all life is pretty good.

But is it healthy to look back and think if only? I'm not sure, we make the choices that at the time seem best and then I think we should look forwards not back.

WonderWendy3 · Post by **WonderWendy3** » Sun Mar 30, 2008 4:18 pm

Interesting question birdy girl!!

I have been telling myself lately that its important not to look back and not to have any regrets...which if I sat down and wrote down the things I'd like to change, would take a long time....but like Immy touched on...if I did change things, I wouldn't be the woman I am today, I wouldn't have 3 beautiful boys, and a story to tell to my grandchildren about when the going got tough....Wendy got tougher!!:)

I wish only happiness for you Pheasy and Immy...and all my garden family!:-6

Pheasy · Post by **Pheasy** » Sun Mar 30, 2008 5:26 pm

You make a good point Wendy and Immy. :-6

I don't want to change things that much. I don't want to change anything that would change me being married to DH, or not having my two wonderful children.

(Except maybe a certain person from my childhood dying a slow and painful death :wah: ... just joking ..... he can carry on living in his 'delusional' world :wah:)

I just want to change recent stuff.

I want to live ... not just survive :-4

hoppy · Post by **hoppy** » Sun Mar 30, 2008 5:31 pm

I would be a better son, brother, husband and dad. I would stay away from booze. Maybe I wouldn't have been such an a**hole. Maybe I wouldn't miss my wife as I do now. Maybe I would now own a farmstead like the one I lived on as a kid.

CARLA · Post by **CARLA** » Sun Mar 30, 2008 5:33 pm

I have come to know that you can't change much in life except what you do today and maybe tomorrow. Regrets get you no where so keep moving forward and try to be the best human being you can is all we really can do. Some of us have special gifts like beautiful voices and the like explore every aspect of that gift your owe it to yourself. :-6

WonderWendy3 · Post by **WonderWendy3** » Sun Mar 30, 2008 5:50 pm

Pheasy;821165 wrote: You make a good point Wendy and Immy. :-6

I don't want to change things that much. I don't want to change anything that would change me being married to DH, or not having my two wonderful children.

(Except maybe a certain person from my childhood dying a slow and painful death :wah: ... just joking ..... he can carry on living in his 'delusional' world :wah:)

I just want to change recent stuff.

I want to live ... not just survive :-4

I feel you on that one dear, I really do!!:-6

Marie5656 · Post by **Marie5656** » Sun Mar 30, 2008 6:47 pm

I would have fought harder to hang onto things that certain family members felt they had a right to take after my father died.

Pheasy · Post by **Pheasy** » Sun Mar 30, 2008 6:52 pm

hoppy;821168 wrote: I would be a better son, brother, husband and dad. I would stay away from booze. Maybe I wouldn't have been such an a**hole. Maybe I wouldn't miss my wife as I do now. Maybe I would now own a farmstead like the one I lived on as a kid.

Maybe .... Realizing where you want to change things ... could be a step closer to being there .... keep going :-4:-4