Jives' School - In the News

Post by **Bryn Mawr** » Thu Jul 06, 2006 10:35 am

cherandbuster wrote:

From what I've read in the archives, seems like he's way past his 2nd chance. I could *barely* get through the Brokeback Mountain thread without throwing something at my monitor.

Is *that* what this is all about?

I was never into films much and give such threads a wide berth. I'll look it up and see what went on

buttercup · Post by **buttercup** » Thu Jul 06, 2006 10:48 am

warning - bryn there's 53 pages

Post by **Bryn Mawr** » Thu Jul 06, 2006 10:53 am

buttercup wrote: warning - bryn there's 53 pages

Thanks for the warning - I just hope I can skip through and find the cause of all this.

I really would like to know what this is all about 'cos it's pissing me off.

DesignerGal · Post by **DesignerGal** » Thu Jul 06, 2006 10:56 am

buttercup wrote: warning - bryn there's 53 pages

So, just a harmless question, would you be able to put defending him on hold until you DO have time to read that thread? Because he is a HUGE jerk and it really gets me irritated to see people blindly defending his character (I just puked in my mouth a little).

buttercup · Post by **buttercup** » Thu Jul 06, 2006 11:01 am

dg if you read over the thread i asked why people couldent just ignore him & move on

obviously they cant

BabyRider · Post by **BabyRider** » Thu Jul 06, 2006 11:01 am

Bryn Mawr wrote: Is *that* what this is all about?

I was never into films much and give such threads a wide berth. I'll look it up and see what went on
It's *part* of what "this" is all about Bryn. You can actually skim that thread and get a fairly good feel for it. But again...it's only part of the bigger picture.

DesignerGal · Post by **DesignerGal** » Thu Jul 06, 2006 11:17 am

buttercup wrote: dg if you read over the thread i asked why people couldent just ignore him & move on

obviously they cant

No we cant because he is a HUGE jerk.

buttercup · Post by **buttercup** » Thu Jul 06, 2006 11:19 am

i dont see calling him a huge jerk any different from him misscalling anyone

DesignerGal · Post by **DesignerGal** » Thu Jul 06, 2006 11:29 am

buttercup wrote: i dont see calling him a huge jerk any different from him misscalling anyone
ok. whatever. thats your call. i cant stand the guy.

cherandbuster · Post by **cherandbuster** » Thu Jul 06, 2006 11:31 am

Buttercup, I truly admire you taking the high road.

You are unconditionally respectful. I admire your kindness towards others.

But . . . it seems the difference here is Jives lying about fellow FGers and trying to get them in trouble. Concocting twisted, negative and disrespectful stories. Once other people are involved in his 'web', all bets are off. That's when I have to question somebody's morals.

If he has strong opinions, so be it.

Many of us here do.

But to create a web of lies about good and honest people here, well, that just crosses the line for me.

You are entitled to your opinion. Truly.

But when I form my opinion, I must take into account the bad along with the good.

BabyRider · Post by **BabyRider** » Thu Jul 06, 2006 11:33 am

buttercup wrote: i dont see calling him a huge jerk any different from him misscalling anyone
There is a HUGE difference between "misscalling" someone and being malicious. Universes of difference. DG saying he's a big jerk is her stating her opinion of the guy, the things he has done have been done out of sheer malice. No matter what pretty label or cute smiley's he adds to his posts.

DesignerGal · Post by **DesignerGal** » Thu Jul 06, 2006 11:36 am

BabyRider wrote: There is a HUGE difference between "misscalling" someone and being malicious. Universes of difference. DG saying he's a big jerk is her stating her opinion of the guy, the things he has done have been done out of sheer malice. No matter what pretty label or cute smiley's he adds to his posts.

Thanks, BR. I am not up to being articulate today. I am spent. I just got back to work and am already feeling, well, drained. Any-hoo...I dont understand this guy. Perhaps he should check the self help section at the local Barnes and Noble. I just got a great book on "Toxic Parents". THat section of the bookstore has EVERYTHING.

Bez · Post by **Bez** » Thu Jul 06, 2006 11:41 am

theia wrote: This is true, Val, and it's got me thinking as to why this really happens...it isn't just in FG, it can happen in any sort of group. What is it that can make some of us react this way?

I always read these sort of threads and wait avidly to read what's posted next. Sometimes I throw in a comment or two, sometimes I stay quiet.

If I'm honest, I usually say something like, "Oh no, trouble again. I'm really fed up with this." But that doesn't stop me reading everything that's posted! So do I really mean that I'm fed up? Frighteningly it doesn't ring true...I'm being totally contradictory.

I suppose I can only reach an answer by looking honestly at my own reactions....but I'm not getting very far...perhaps I'm nervous of what I might find. Is there anyone braver than me who might have some ideas of why? Because there is definitely a perverse sort of attraction to threads of this kind.

I sometimes wonder if, in a previous life, I was one of the women who sat knitting beneath the guillotine!

Theias post probably mirrors my thoughts exactly....why do people crowd round to watch fights..why do people 'rubberneck' traffic accidents ?

I guess it's human nature...I leave the answers to the experts.

The 'fluffy brigade' (I count myself as one) get involved here in the guise of 'peace maker' and mediator and normally get accused of being pacifists, 'do gooders' etc. and normally shouted down until we 'beat a hasty retreat' then we either leave altogether or creep back later when the heat's died down.

We all have a place here...the strong characters and the 'rest'.....or don't we ???

There has been a catalogue of issues involving Jives for months now ....my personal belief is that his relationship with most people here is beyond repair despite the attempts with several sticking plasters. i have a personal opinion about Jives that I'm not prepared to voice publicly.

I have only just read his comment on 'the gun' thread aimed at BR and I am ashamed that another human being can make such comments knowing BRs circumstances. I had not previously read the thread because the 'gun issue' is probably the one thing where there is a huge difference between the thinking of us in the UK and you folks in the US. It is my belief that we are a million miles away in our thinking here.

So...that's my input for what it's worth...

buttercup · Post by **buttercup** » Thu Jul 06, 2006 11:41 am

i dont mind anybody disliking him, i couldent care less, what i object to is he IS a member & all we hear is how fg is one big loving family, technically these type of threads show thats just not true, everytime the guy makes a post there is this big hoo ha carry on about it where he is called names & other members try to justify it by dragging up the past of what he has done, get over it, its just the internet, calm down, chill out, move on

im outta this thread, my time could be better spent elsewhere :driving: :-6

Post by **Bryn Mawr** » Thu Jul 06, 2006 11:48 am

DesignerGal wrote: So, just a harmless question, would you be able to put defending him on hold until you DO have time to read that thread? Because he is a HUGE jerk and it really gets me irritated to see people blindly defending his character (I just puked in my mouth a little).

I'm not defending him! I do get pissed off with having your argument with him thrown in my face for week after week.

If you don't like him ignore him - don't try to hound him off the site, that's the admin's job.

BabyRider · Post by **BabyRider** » Thu Jul 06, 2006 11:51 am

buttercup wrote: i dont mind anybody disliking him, i couldent care less, what i object to is he IS a member & all we hear is how fg is one big loving family, technically these type of threads show thats just not true, everytime the guy makes a post there is this big hoo ha carry on about it where he is called names & other members try to justify it by dragging up the past of what he has done, get over it, its just the internet, calm down, chill out, move on

im outta this thread, my time could be better spent elsewhere :driving: :-6
Obviously you DO mind people "disliking" him, Butter, or you wouldn't bother being his mouthpiece. Overall FG is one big happy family, but just like real families, there is the jerk that people can't stand. The one stupid uncle who insists on making an ass of himself, the cousin who is the "black sheep" and keeps screwing things up, that aunt who just p!sses everyone off and is mean and nasty.

So, is it a family, like you say, or is it *just* the internet. Because I have made some very good friends here. Even though it's *just* the web. J has a lot to answer for. He needs to be held accountable for his actions.

And I agree: your time could be better spent elsewhere, because it's not likely that anything short of an act of God will change the minds of most of us.

Rapunzel · Post by **Rapunzel** » Thu Jul 06, 2006 11:54 am

buttercup wrote: wonders about quoting everyone from the forgivness & troll threads then thinks whats the point

for crying out loud people if jives winds you up put him on ignore, constantly attacking him no matter what he has done only makes you look venemous & this place a school playground

everyone should take a look at the amount of times 'fg is a big family' is used in posts & wonder what a lie that is

I agree. We all went through hell a few months ago when FG was bitterly divided.

Do we REALLY need to drag up all this sh1t again???

It got to the stage when Anastrophe threatened to pull the plug . . . then everyone quickly backed down and muttered *sorry* to each other.

As buttercup says, it's all playground politics! You're all shouting and calling each other names and I don't like reading it and I'm sure any newbies are going to scurry off pretty damn fast with their tails between their legs!

Betty Boop wrote: Do we really have to go through all this crap everytime Jives comes here? .....

I just hate to see all this bitchiness.

.....

It takes far too much energy to hate in my opinion. Live and Let Live, put him on ignore.

As we are all SO divided over this issue, why don't we all give him ONE LAST chance?

Then if he says something terrible, we'll all be agreed!

As Betty says, there is too much crap raised over this one person and this one issue. Now make it a do or die moment and stop harassing him and let him come back into the fold and play nice.

Jives, Congratulations on what you are doing! Teaching children so wonderfully, as you and Chonsi and the other teachers here do, is an incredible thing!

Very Well Done to you!

But PLEASE can you play nice too now and not say anything, even in fun, that could possibly be taken the wrong way! I'd hate to lose you and your great posts!

cherandbuster · Post by **cherandbuster** » Thu Jul 06, 2006 11:56 am

Peacekeeping is a good thing

Thank you Buttercup and Rapunzel

for carrying the peacekeeping banner:)

BabyRider · Post by **BabyRider** » Thu Jul 06, 2006 11:59 am

Oo. Boy, Rap, sorry I gotta disagree again. When anastrophe threatened to pull the plug I was the first one to jump up and say something....NOT back down and mutter "sorry" to anyone.

I will say, one mmore time....A) J has had many chances to redeem himself and has blown each and every one. B) Just *one more* chance is wrong. He needs to be held accountable for his actions, just like everyone should be. Period.

DesignerGal · Post by **DesignerGal** » Thu Jul 06, 2006 12:00 pm

Bryn Mawr wrote: I'm not defending him! I do get pissed off with having your argument with him thrown in my face for week after week.

If you don't like him ignore him - don't try to hound him off the site, that's the admin's job.

Ok. I wasnt talking to you. And I dont much like being accused of throwing anything in your face when I have been logged off for the better part of three weeks now.

Bez · Post by **Bez** » Thu Jul 06, 2006 12:06 pm

cherandbuster wrote: Peacekeeping is a good thing

Thank you Buttercup and Rapunzel

for carrying the peacekeeping banner:)

It's a pity the peacekeepers are always the ones that get 'beaten up' and bullied, when all they are doing is trying to keep a balanced view on things.

This thread's going to end up in the tar pit I guess...another one down the toilet.

cherandbuster · Post by **cherandbuster** » Thu Jul 06, 2006 12:09 pm

Bez holds the other end of the Peacekeeping Banner

Keep doing what you're doing

It's a good thing:)

BabyRider · Post by **BabyRider** » Thu Jul 06, 2006 12:11 pm

Bez wrote: It's a pity the peacekeepers are always the ones that get 'beaten up' and bullied, when all they are doing is trying to keep a balanced view on things.

This thread's going to end up in the tar pit I guess...another one down the toilet.
I just can't seem to find common ground today. I don't think the people attempting to "keep the peace" are being beaten up and bullied. I think it's more of just disagreeing with them. We can disagree and not bully people.

DesignerGal · Post by **DesignerGal** » Thu Jul 06, 2006 12:16 pm

Congrats to Jives for accomplishing this thing with his troubled kids though. Thats what the thread IS about anyway. So lets start another thread to hash out our feelings over the other issues. Its the right thing to do.

valerie · Post by **valerie** » Thu Jul 06, 2006 12:27 pm

I could forgive jives once or twice. I could and DID forgive the GB lie,

and if he wants to allow it I'll post my pm to him, I might still have it,

as chagrined as I would be to see it myself again. The deep seated

problem is it's NOT the lying and the boastfullness. It's the outright

cruelty he's exhibited to other members. Most of you have only seen

the very tip of the iceberg, believe me. Anyone who wants can

poke around and find posts where I've out and out supported this

guy, told him I respected and admired him and was proud to know

him. What did he do to that? Shoved my nose in it, more than once.

If, after he said that to BR, he had come back and said anything even

CLOSE to oh shoot I'm sorry that sounded bad didn't it? AND if it was

the first or second time he'd done same... maybe. But what he exhibits

is a very destructive pattern of behavior. On many levels. Why should

any of us let that go? Parents, your child is whacking his younger

sibling in the face with a wooden block. Do you let that continue? I'm

not a parent but I seriously doubt you do.

Peacekeepers, I do understand where you're coming from. But also

realize that jives himself gave us REAMS of material to work with,

we don't make this stuff up how could we? Why should 20 of us

(I just picked a number out of my hat I'm talkin' through! :p ) kowtow

to him and his minions? He's got a place he can go that's very nice

and get lots of strokes.

I was going to pm her but I'm just ballsy enough to say it in public:

Minks had a oneliner post. Got in, said what she wanted to say, and

got out. Didn't involve herself in the rest of this. Disagree with her

though I might on her position, she supported a friend and went on

her way. How great is that?

It IS only the internet, Butter, but this cyber family is VERY important

to me. I would think less of myself if I sat idly by and didn't see a

wrong and try my best to right it.

Bez · Post by **Bez** » Thu Jul 06, 2006 12:28 pm

BabyRider wrote: I just can't seem to find common ground today. I don't think the people attempting to "keep the peace" are being beaten up and bullied. I think it's more of just disagreeing with them. We can disagree and not bully people.

Jives has accomplished something (evidence posted) and all we can do is say 'Well done' for that.

The other issues are separate and I don't know how they can be resolved. You say he should be held accountable....how ? What do you want him to do BR ?

pina · Post by **pina** » Thu Jul 06, 2006 12:46 pm

There has been so much said from all parties, but it is in the past and should either be forgotten or got over. this thread was about some good teaching from Jives, he hasn't said anything in this post to warrant the slagging off he is getting.

Again well done Jives.

Jives · Post by **Jives** » Thu Jul 06, 2006 1:10 pm

Outstanding. I read each and every one of your posts and I have to say that BR was absolutely right. Every post in this thread is a clear window to the kind of person that each poster is deep inside.

Every single one.

Now everyone sit back and think hard about what your post says about you.

Gracious? Vindictive? Forgiving? Hateful? Honest? Petty? It's all laid out to see here.

Oh..and thanks for making my thread so successful. That's the most posts I ever got to any thread I ever started! LOl!:wah:

Gotta go! Time to change the world!;)

DesignerGal · Post by **DesignerGal** » Thu Jul 06, 2006 1:16 pm

At least he didnt post and run this time!:D

BabyRider · Post by **BabyRider** » Thu Jul 06, 2006 1:24 pm

Won't speak for anyone else, but if those are my choices, I'll go with "honest." Thankyouverymuch. :yh_eyerol

And there he is again, with his smarmy "Look what a success you've made me!!" That ego is going to have a hard time fitting through ANY door real soon.

DesignerGal · Post by **DesignerGal** » Thu Jul 06, 2006 1:36 pm

I'll have to go with honest too. Can we share BR?

BabyRider · Post by **BabyRider** » Thu Jul 06, 2006 1:43 pm

DesignerGal wrote: I'll have to go with honest too. Can we share BR?
Abso-freakin-lutely!!!!! :yh_bigsmi

Peg · Post by **Peg** » Thu Jul 06, 2006 2:54 pm

Now everyone sit back and think hard about what your post says about you.
Perhaps you should do the same.

Nomad · Post by **Nomad** » Thu Jul 06, 2006 4:42 pm

chives quote

Now everyone sit back and think hard about what your post says about you

Take your own advice worm, if you had done that then acted accordingly we wouldnt be having this conversation.

DesignerGal · Post by **DesignerGal** » Thu Jul 06, 2006 6:06 pm

Nomad wrote: chives quote

Now everyone sit back and think hard about what your post says about you

Take your own advice worm, if you had done that then acted accordingly we wouldnt be having this conversation.

:-4

DesignerGal · Post by **DesignerGal** » Thu Jul 06, 2006 6:16 pm

flopstock wrote: Criminy lemondrop! You sound like someone poked you in the eye with a stick or something...:p

Flops, you crack me up!

Accountable · Post by **Accountable** » Thu Jul 06, 2006 8:05 pm

chonsigirl wrote: Val, you would never hurt my feelings! True friends always speak how they feel, and what they think is right. :-4

And you are being BR's sweet friend for defending her-because yes, Jives did say a hurtful thing to her that day. Hurtful isn't enough to describe it. I cannot think in terms to reply to mean comments written to another. I was shocked at what was written, and was sad when I read it. We are here to support each other, through thick and thin as they say. That is what friendship is. I believe FG is that type of place, where we are real friends.

Yes, Jives, you have a wonderful program and I am glad you are doing it. Students need a second chance to do well. I think these same principles need to be applied here as well. Second chances are to be taken seriously, and the person must try even harder to do well. I think many would like to see you given a second chance, but you must be serious about it. We would like to see the insightful, contributing posts you have always made in the past, your humor and cool stories. But we would also like to see a spirit of peace, and of understanding. Intentional malace is perceived as such, and many are ever alert to it now. That is why threads go in this direction. We are never too old to learn in life these lessons, that if we would only treat people as kindly and with respect as we want to be treated, the same feelings will be returned. Jives, I think that is what people would like for you to do.Can I visit you this winter? I think if I sit close enough, I can just bask in the warmth of your spirit and not need a jacket.:-4

BabyRider · Post by **BabyRider** » Fri Jul 07, 2006 1:32 am

Accountable wrote: Can I visit you this winter? I think if I sit close enough, I can just bask in the warmth of your spirit and not need a jacket.:-4
And if I sit close enough to you, Acc., will I catch some of your nausea? This really is disgusting, I have to say. When is a person finally held accountable for their actions as you profess to demand?? I am just disgusted with this entire travesty, and Lord knows....I've had about all I can handle of travesty's of justice lately. I'm sickened....I'm outta here....

DesignerGal · Post by **DesignerGal** » Fri Jul 07, 2006 7:17 am

Thank you Clancy! You always say exactly what I want to say but I can never formulate the words. Im just not good at articulating my thoughts.

I love you!:-4

Peg · Post by **Peg** » Fri Jul 07, 2006 7:17 am

:yh_clap :yh_clap :yh_worshp

CARLA · Post by **CARLA** » Fri Jul 07, 2006 8:05 am

Clancy excellent mate...:yh_worshp :yh_worshp :yh_clap :yh_clap

cherandbuster · Post by **cherandbuster** » Fri Jul 07, 2006 8:29 am

Clancy, I thoroughly read your thought-provoking thread.

I find it full of honest and unbiased information.

Thank you for taking the time to post it.

You're aces in my book.:-4

valerie · Post by **valerie** » Fri Jul 07, 2006 8:47 am