Besides, dogs don't make you split up all of your belongings, do they?
And they don't break your heart either.
When I get my own place next year, I shall seriously consider getting a kitten or young cat from the 'Cat rescue' place. I love cats...haven't had one for 20 years. A grey tabby mmmmmmmmmm
A smile is a window on your face to show your heart is home
A cat will be nice to keep you company. You'll never 'really' be alone. When my husband and his ex broke up years ago, he was very sad and lonely. He said that having Rusty the orange tabby around really soothed his soul.
Bez wrote: When I get my own place next year, I shall seriously consider getting a kitten or young cat from the 'Cat rescue' place. I love cats...haven't had one for 20 years. A grey tabby mmmmmmmmmm
Bez, that's a great idea and I'm so glad you'll be going to the cat rescue and not buying one from a breeder or petstore. Good on you, sweets!! :-6
[FONT=Arial Black]I hope you cherish this sweet way of life, and I hope you know that it comes with a price. ~Darrel Worley~ [/FONT]
Bullet's trial was a farce. Can I get an AMEN?????
It's because they don't give a "Lerners Permit" for Marriage! :p
So then many people just bite the bullet, & go for the Marriage License. And then treat it like a lerners permit anyway! Some do it "repeat times", again no learners permit available! Society has seemed to have changed over the years. As years ago, Divorce was a dirty word, & people involved usually kept it private & quiet.
Today, many people have "I got divorced parties", and make a similar affair as when they married. Times sure do change! :rolleyes:
BabyRider wrote: Bez, that's a great idea and I'm so glad you'll be going to the cat rescue and not buying one from a breeder or petstore. Good on you, sweets!! :-6
Oh there are so many that need some TLC in the rescue homes. I can't believe the cruelty that some pets endure ....makes my blood boil. I just read about a cat that was put in a washing machine....just shocking.
You rarely see kittens or puppies in pet shops over here....mainly rabbits, gerbils etc.
I have 5 goldfish in a 'terrace pond' but I'll have to leave them here for my son to look after for a while.
A smile is a window on your face to show your heart is home
cars wrote: "31" bliss filled years last June 21st!
(No thanks to my troublemaker Family members! That's a whole nother story!)
That's fantastic Cars....and we shouldn't forget that a LOT of marriages/relationships ARE really happy and lasting *sigh*...it's just finding that special person.
A smile is a window on your face to show your heart is home
Bez wrote: That's fantastic Cars....and we shouldn't forget that a LOT of marriages/relationships ARE really happy and lasting *sigh*...it's just finding that special person.
One should "never" (never say never) give up hope! There "IS" someone out there for everyone! Sometimes it just takes longer for some than for others.
I've held out and have never been married. Sometimes I think it would be nice to finally find that "someone" . I worry about growing old alone, a little. I am not "alone", I have friends and we are like family, but things happen.
I do have my cat, Veruka!
"My body is the earth but my head is in the stars."
I divorced twice. The first guy left me to do absolutely everything. Wouldn't do anything 'with' me. Had no interest, whilst we were going through a 'trial' separation met someone else.
The second time was a disaster. I am with someone now who I met on the internet. We've been together almost 6 years. Two boys later. I've always paid for everything except this last year. NOw he has to pay and we're struggling to pay the bills, but he is supporting a brand new watch, a repaired bike. . . and a fish tank, this month alone.
He isn't worried about feeding the kids, as long as he is alright. I want the relationship to work but I have a sad feeling that it isn't.
My boss once told me that he has been divorced 3 times because he "has a problem staying faithful". He is now working on divorce #4. He's getting married for the fourth time although he still has "a problem staying faithful".
Peg wrote: My boss once told me that he has been divorced 3 times because he "has a problem staying faithful". He is now working on divorce #4. He's getting married for the fourth time although he still has "a problem staying faithful".
Peg wrote: My boss once told me that he has been divorced 3 times because he "has a problem staying faithful". He is now working on divorce #4. He's getting married for the fourth time although he still has "a problem staying faithful".
My ex sister-in -law is now on her 4th husband.
It would be wonderful if you knew where you were going wrong. I always end up with same sort of person. Selfish, uncaring. and an absolute pig to live with.
I thought when I met my current partner he would be different. I really loved him. but, there is only so much hurt you can take. i have 2 children with him. i was pregnant with the second one (he was telling everyone how much he really wanted another one) and he told me that his ex girlfriend had two abortions, the first one may not have been his, he told me it didn't matter how many children we have they wouldn't mean as much to him as the ones she destroyed.
When I had the second child it took them 15 minutes to bring him round. I nearly lost him. How could he say that?? He admitted seeing other women whilst he was in a relationship with me, although he claims he never 'cheated on me'. he is controlling, telling me when I can go out who I can have round and when. I don't want another relationship to end but I just can't see myself in this position next year. I've had enough. I don't work at the moment as the boys are still very young. He is forcing me to go out to work, I've always had the bills come out of my account and now he is refusing to top up the money I have going in to cover the payments. I don't have any one to look after the children and haven't got a car at the moment. I live in a village so I'd have to travel to get to work.
I see my life before me being on my own and dealing with everything alone
Kattyia5 wrote: I see my life before me being on my own and dealing with everything alone
Kattyia, if you really are unhappy and he is controlling you, being on your own and dealing with everything on your own is actually easier.
I walked out on my marriage over a year ago and have never looked backed, life is so much easier without a controlling man in the way, especially a man who cheats, you deserve better hunni. :-4
Betty Boop wrote: Kattyia, if you really are unhappy and he is controlling you, being on your own and dealing with everything on your own is actually easier.
I walked out on my marriage over a year ago and have never looked backed, life is so much easier without a controlling man in the way, especially a man who cheats, you deserve better hunni. :-4
Sound advice from someone who has been through it :-6
I agree with BB Kat, it's better on your own. I had a similar experience to BB as well and sure it hurts and it's a struggle but it can be done. I left a 17 year marriage, and looking back now, I am glad for it. I have been on my own now for 3 years almost to the date. I am so much happier. A controlling partner is a horrible thing to live with. I wish you luck and if you need to chat or vent we are all good listeners and sometimes even have good advice, you will find many of us have been in similar situations.
Minks
�You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough.�
Bez wrote: My sentiments exactly.....for better or worse....once said, you try and live by it..however, when it is worse with a capital 'W' , for your own health, happiness and wellbeing, then I think you have to 'take stock'.
Bez, good luck to you! I've done this twice now. As has been mentioned in previous posts. One would think a person would learn after the first one. I didn't and stepped right back in to the same kind of relationship. Control and abuse.
Took a while but now I know what to look for, what my rights as a human being are.
First one lasted over 20 years, yet went wrong as soon as the first child was born, because one became a parent and the other stayed single, so to speak.
I am prove that divorced people can get along and be friends. That is what the father to my children and I are...Good friends.
Second no children, no contact..far more damage done to my well being in 4 years then the past 20.
I would say it takes about a year to heal somewhat, from then on it's one step at a time.
One more thing.....just when you think there's no one you would ever love again, ands stop looking....that Soulmate show up :-6
