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Fiction writing is great, you can make up almost anything."

- Ivana Trump, on finishing her first novel



"I can't really remember the names of the clubs that we went to."

- Shaquille O'Neal, basketball player, on whether he had visited the Parthenon during his visit to Greece



"It is wonderful to be here in the great state of Chicago"

- Dan Quayle, former U.S. Vice-President



"Smoking kills. If you're killed, you've lost a very important part of your life."

- Brooke Shields, during an interview to become spokesperson for a federal anti-smoking campaign.

Far Rider wrote: "ok girls..come open your buns and let me stick a wiener in it"



said the "Youth for Christ" Youth Minister to a group of girls standing in a serving line at a Youth for Christ campus BBQ.


LOL ! Ok threads over ! Nothing to see here lets keep the line moving

Stupid Qoute!!

"I have opinions of my own --strong opinions-- but I don't always agree with them."

-George Bush

"Too many good docs are getting out of the business. Too many OB-GYNs aren't able to practice their love with women all across this country."



Sort of gives new meaning to the term "compassionate conservatism."





.....................................-G.W.Bush

"Whenever I watch TV and I see those poor starving kids all over the world, I can't help but cry. I mean I would love to be skinny like that, but not with all those flies and death and stuff."

- Mariah Carey, Pop Singer



"If you take out the killings, Washington actually has a very low crime rate."

- Marion Barry, mayor of Washington, D.C.



"If somebody has a bad heart, they can plug this jack in at night as they go to bed and it will monitor their heart throughout the night. And the next morning, when they wake up dead, there'll be a record."

- Mark S. Fowler, FCC Chairman



"I'll fight Lloyd Honeyghan for nothing if the price is right"

- Marlon Starling



"Pitching is 80% of the game. The other half is hitting and fielding."

- Mickey Rivers, baseball player



"I'd rather be dead than singing 'Satisfaction' when I am forty-five."

- Mick Jagger, Pop Singer, before he turned 45



"I would not live forever, because we should not live forever, because if we were ever supposed to live forever, then we would live forever, but we cannot live forever, which is why I would not live forever."

- Miss Alabama, in the 1994 Miss Universe contest, when asked if she would want to live forever.



"The Lybian army is capable of destroying America and breaking its nose."

- Muammar Qaddafi, Libyian President



"We now have exactly the same situation as we had at the start of the race, only exactly the

opposite"

- Murray Walker, Sportscaster

"Please provide the date of your death."

-from an IRS letter



"I was under medication when I made the decision to burn the tapes."

-Richard (Dicky) Nixon



Helpful Warnings: "CAUTION: Knife is very sharp. Keep out of children"



"Danny, as you know, was hospitalized last week after complaining about chest and sideburns."

- Ned Martin, Sportscaster



"That's just the tip of the ice cube."

- Neil Hamilton, BBC2



"We are not without accomplishment. We have managed to distribute poverty equally."

- Nguyen Co Thatch, Vietnamese foreign minister

"Brownie, you're doing a heck of a job." –President Bush, to FEMA director Michael Brown, while touring hurricane-ravaged Mississippi, Sept. 2, 2005

These are TWICE as funny when you've had a few !!!:D

"And an Mansell comes into the pits, he's quite literally sweating his eyeballs out."

- UK Sports coverage on TV

"We didn't lose, we weren't beaten, we just came in second."

- U.S. commentators, after Canadian Donavon Bailey won the 100 metre gold medal at the 1996 Olympics

Accountable wrote: "And an Mansell comes into the pits, he's quite literally sweating his eyeballs out."

- UK Sports coverage on TV

"We didn't lose, we weren't beaten, we just came in second."

- U.S. commentators, after Canadian Donavon Bailey won the 100 metre gold medal at the 1996 Olympics


Nigel mansell....my hero...

Yogi Berra Classics:



"I really didn't say everything I said."





"A nickel ain't worth a dime any more."





"It's like deja vu all over again."





"Always go to other peoples' funerals, otherwise they won't go to yours."





"Predictions are difficult, especially about the future."