ForumGarden

THE YEAR'S BEST [actual] HEADLINES OF 200 5 :

Crack Found on Governor's Daughter

[Imagine that!]



Something Went Wrong in Jet Crash, Expert Says

[No, really?]



Police Begin Campaign to Run Down Jaywalkers

[Now that's taking things a bit far!]

Is There a Ring of Debris around Uranus?

[Not if I wipe thoroughly!]





Panda Mating Fails; Veterinarian Takes Over

[What a guy!]





Miners Refuse to Work after Death

[No-good-for-nothing' lazy so-and-sos!]



Juvenile Court to Try Shooting Defendant

[See if that works any better than a fair trial!]





War Dims Hope for Peace

[I can see where it might have that effect!]



If Strike Isn't Settled Quickly, It May Last Awhile

[You think?]



Cold Wave Linked to Temperatures

[Who would have thought!]

Enfield (London) Couple Slain; Police Suspect Homicide





Red Tape Holds Up New Bridges

[You mean there's something stronger than duct tape?]



Man Struck By Lightning: Faces Battery Charge

[He probably ISthe battery charge!]





New Study of Obesity Looks for Larger Test Group

[Weren't they fat enough?!]



Astronaut Takes Blame for Gas in Spacecraft





Kids Make Nutritious Snacks

[Taste like chicken?]



LocalHigh SchoolDropouts Cut in Half

[Chainsaw Massacre all over again!]





Hospitals are Sued by 7 Foot Doctors

[Boy, are they tall!]





And the winner is....





Typhoon Rips Through Cemetery; Hundreds Dead

:wah: Those were good, makes you wonder if the editors even look at the headlines sometimes.

Sometimes I think they do it on purpose! I mean c'mon! LOL! These people are supposed to have college degree's!