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Intervention time.



Did something really traumatic happen to the friend?



Sounds like meds are needed, for sure. MAJOR meds.

Yes, Floppy. Do ring the alarm bells!!!! Is there a mental health 'first aid' team at your local hospital? Or a mental health help line to call. That's what I'd do here.

Depression or is the friend already on meds.? Alcohol involved?

Someone needs to get the friend out of bed, into a shower - have a good cry if that's what it takes, and off to a DR.

Who's taking care of the child ? Is she a single parent? She could get herself into trouble with custody - well being for the child ??

Get her up and to a DR.

Been there !!

Patsy

Tmbsgrl

Sorry to hear about your loss. Depression can hang on for some time.

I had my own - 1988 my husband died 30 yrs old, we were both 30 at the time.

He went to work one day and never came home. (heart attack) Major set back - I remember sleeping alot - I woke up one morning drank some old coffee - real old, I don't know when I made coffee last, this had mold floating on the top, I still sipped it as if it was hot. Denial !! I opened my drapes for the first time in ??, and saw snow.

I packed my car and belongings, drove until I found sunshine.

Since 1988 I've had several other set backs, it never goes away - good days and bad.

Patsy

Oh tmbsgrl, I really feel for you! :yh_hugs

I had 3 miscarriages - well, 2 really because once was twins. The twins would have been 11 by now and the baby would have been 6 months old. He was actually due when we had the FG meet up in London, so it was a lovely way to take my mind off it and stop me wallowing in grief! It makes the children you DO have, infinitely more precious and thats what you have to concentrate on!

As for the lost babies, I named them and had masses said for them, I pray for them, light candles for them (and my 2 also) and I firmly believe that I'll see them when I die. Losing a baby is something you never forget - even though it was a miscarriage, it was still alive, still a part of you. You keep these babies in a gentle corner of your mind, love them, remember them, but concentrate on the precious children you have now and not on the lost babes - thats too hard! We have to be grateful that we have these precious children, some women continually miscarry and none of their little ones survive. I don't think I could cope with that.

Big hugs to you Susie. :yh_hugs

Definatly depression!! Has there been some sort of stressor recently in her life she needs to deal with? An interesting thing that Rick learned...he has type 2 diabetes, and his Doctor told him that this can trigger depression. Not depression over the diabetes..but just the depression! And there are times he is very down.

She definatly needs intervention, like yesterday.

These responses have been amazing. It seems we *all* have our stories to share, don't we?

Floop, I had a friend (kind of an acquaintance/friend) who did the same thing. She would stay in bed for days. She had twin daughters. And this was how she was teaching them to cope with life's problems? It was really sad.

TGirl, Patsy, Rapper, Di -- thanks for opening up. My love to all of you.

Floppy, keep us posted on your friend. :-6

tmbsgrl wrote: She does need professional help- I was like this once in my life. It was when I miscarried. Actually I wouldn't leave the hospital for 2 weeks because I was in denial about my baby being gone. Then once I got home I was in major depression- took me almost 2 years to get outta it. I'm not over it and I will never be. In a few weeks my son would have been 8 years old.


yup know how you feel on that one tmbsgrl it would of been my little girls birthday today some times life gives you such a kick in the **** they disappear for a while and of course some things are so bad you never really get over them my deepest sympathies are with you:-1



on the subject of your friend i feel T L C is the order of the day honestly guys some things hurt so bad it takes years to get back on your feet believe me i know its not just a case of pull yourself together stiff upper lip and all that

flopstock wrote: I've talked about this friend of mine a couple of times now...



This friend has been in bed basically since last Tuesday.. yeah, you heard right.. over a week now.



#1... WTF??

#2... It doesn't occur to family members that it may be time to throw some water on the bed?

#3...WTF???

#4...That means they just haven't gone to work for over a week..excuse me -but how do people do that?

#5...WTF????

#6... I finally got a response by threatening to call the friends father to go check up on them(below the belt since father is not well:sneaky: ) So I says 'f u, f me and f the folks getting to you.. get your ass out of bed because you have a daughter who is being taught by example how to handle life....'. A tad harsh? maybe.. but i have a very low threshold on most things..:wah:



I'm thinking professional help is really being screamed for here.. I mean seriously - over a week because you are feeling so sad?


Perhaps this person does need help. I don't think it will help at all to threaten

and swear at them, though.

tmbsgrl wrote: I agree with you- I think about him all the time though. His name was Austin. In Illinois I do have a gravesite for him that my mom goes to all the time to put flowers & a new Teddy Bear- Last time she said she left him an action figure. That was the hardest part about leaving Illinois. I haven't been back to his grave in almost 5 years- but my family goes once a week. Along with his daddys family. I keep the ultrasound pic in my purse & when I need a smile I just look at him. Might sound crazy but I know he is watching me & i know I will meet him one day & when I do I will never let go again. :-4
i have not been to my daughters grave in 3 years her name was natasha and it was her birthday today on sunday i will muster all my courage and go to the cemetry it will be hard for not only is my little angel there my two younger brothers are buried there martin and casey along with my mom ,to say its gona be a hard day for me is an understatment

:-4 Hugs and love for you, tmbsgrl.

flopstock wrote: I've talked about this friend of mine a couple of times now...



This friend has been in bed basically since last Tuesday.. yeah, you heard right.. over a week now.



#1... WTF??

#2... It doesn't occur to family members that it may be time to throw some water on the bed?

#3...WTF???

#4...That means they just haven't gone to work for over a week..excuse me -but how do people do that?

#5...WTF????

#6... I finally got a response by threatening to call the friends father to go check up on them(below the belt since father is not well:sneaky: ) So I says 'f u, f me and f the folks getting to you.. get your ass out of bed because you have a daughter who is being taught by example how to handle life....'. A tad harsh? maybe.. but i have a very low threshold on most things..:wah:



I'm thinking professional help is really being screamed for here.. I mean seriously - over a week because you are feeling so sad?






Whats stopping you ?

tumbs, so sorry to hear about your loss and jimbos, to say we understand is not possible unless we have shared that experience.



reguarding the other issue, I dont think she can get out of bed on her own, sometimes when life becomes to much and a person thinks they are in this thing alone , bed seems the safest place to hide, if you sleep it is an escape, get her up and in the shower and physically help her get to the doctors office, and stay in the examination room and tell the doctor everything that has been going on.

Marie5656;420063 wrote: Definatly depression!! Has there been some sort of stressor recently in her life she needs to deal with? An interesting thing that Rick learned...he has type 2 diabetes, and his Doctor told him that this can trigger depression. Not depression over the diabetes..but just the depression! And there are times he is very down.

She definatly needs intervention, like yesterday.


i can understand how that can happen, i am producing very high levels of calcium and after SEVEN YEARS of the docs trying to get to the bottom of this, i get told, only last week, that this can cause severe depression !!

due to different things happening i have depression anyway and i can sleep for england, my doc told me that this is my way of coping with it, instead of sitting in a corner, tearing my hair out !!