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My relationship with my mother was non-existant until a few years ago due to my poor mental health.... I treated her appallingly, time and time again.

All I can say, is that her forgiveness means that I value our relationship so much, that I won't let anything get in the way of it again, and I'd do whatever it takes to make sure she's happy again.

I'm not prepared to go into details on a forum, but if you want to chat, then you can email me at supersillyarse@yahoo.co.uk.

I really feel for you both - a mother's love is so important, and I believe unconditional. Perhaps there is a way to get through to them. It may be that they just need to feel needed again?..... I don't know :-1

Supersilly@rse wrote: My relationship with my mother was non-existant until a few years ago due to my poor mental health.... I treated her appallingly, time and time again.



All I can say, is that her forgiveness means that I value our relationship so much, that I won't let anything get in the way of it again, and I'd do whatever it takes to make sure she's happy again.



I'm not prepared to go into details on a forum, but if you want to chat, then you can email me at supersillyarse@yahoo.co.uk.



I really feel for you both - a mother's love is so important, and I believe unconditional. Perhaps there is a way to get through to them. It may be that they just need to feel needed again?..... I don't know


you seem to of sorted it all out now well done



i presume you have a good relationship with your father then and why do you feel that its only women that can offer you advice on your relationship with your mother it seems a bit harsh on men in general maybe a guy could give you advice how his sisters relationship with their mother went ....eh ...eh



alas i can do neither both my mother and one of my sisters hated me



and the other sister has just stabbed me and sue in the back big time and now we don't speak either



Ive just realised i have no family any one to want adopt an 18 stone fat bald guy



any one........any one at all ......... i'm house trained and everything -1

Wendybird wrote: Can you cook?



;)


i can sizzle :sneaky:



the person that sent me the pm about ruining every ones post and i promised I'd be more considerate in future



well i lied



sorry super silly but i can cook



can you cook



look i'm trying to take her mind of her probs with her mom ok butt out

SnoozeControl wrote: This is one of those scams where I send $25 and get a cheaply printed birth certificate for you, isn't it?


er ..its actually not a scam you send me £300 and you get me to call you mommy

daddy is an extra £50

SnoozeControl wrote: That reminds me of Hugh Grant's line in "Bridget Jones" when he sees her granny panties. :wah:



Now you've done it Jimbo, I'm messing up this thread too... it's all your fault!


sue is bridget jones and her panties fit me .............i mean i imagine they would fit me

jimbo wrote: the person that sent me the pm about ruining every ones post


Jimbo

Did someone really do that?

Said that you ruined everyone's posts?

I don't agree at all! :guitarist

SnoozeControl wrote: I already apologized, Cher! Sheesh.:rolleyes:


Snoozie

Don't make me say "I love you" again :p

Hamster wrote: Cher..can you tell me instead?? I'm having one of those days...


1) Hammie, I love you lots :-4

2) You have a luscious ass :guitarist

3) You are a wonderful mother

Hamster wrote: I promised someone I wouldn't flirt with anyone for the rest of the week...just to see if I could


Oh that's crazy, Hammie

Flirting is wonderful and harmless here in the Garden.

I REFUSE to stop :guitarist :p

jimbo wrote: you seem to of sorted it all out now well done



i presume you have a good relationship with your father then and why do you feel that its only women that can offer you advice on your relationship with your mother it seems a bit harsh on men in general maybe a guy could give you advice how his sisters relationship with their mother went ....eh ...eh



alas i can do neither both my mother and one of my sisters hated me



and the other sister has just stabbed me and sue in the back big time and now we don't speak either



Ive just realised i have no family any one to want adopt an 18 stone fat bald guy



any one........any one at all ......... i'm house trained and everything


Actually I've only seen my dad three times in the past ten years, and two of those were after an operation. I wasn't so much asking for advice, as offering to give a perspective on a relationship that has been mended.

My boyf has good relationships with both parents after a lot of soul searching, and has given lots of good advice.

Also 'et Al' means and all others...... (boys included)

If you really need adopting, I think that battersea is quite near you. Tie a collar round your neck and don't shave for a few days..... you'd stand as good a chance as any!!!! :wah:

Ps - You've got a lovely adopted family in Suzy by the sounds of things!

cherandbuster wrote: Jimbo



Did someone really do that?



Said that you ruined every-one's posts?



I don't agree at all! :guitarist


do i get any warnings or do i get banned straight off



its some one i know ,they told me i don't have the right forum etiquette



and if i carried on I'd get banned , for some people are deadly serious on here



and take there posts being ruined not well at all



but in my defence i just need to have a laugh i would not want to hurt any



ones feelings or cause offence



crap my cher you have led me into a trap i'm doing it again i'm ruining some



once post :wah:



maybe i'll start a thread why does jimbo need to be funny :wah:



actually i'll wait until some one is being serious and do it on there thread



doh i'm doin it now

jimbo wrote: for some people are deadly serious on here



and take there posts being ruined not well at all


Screw them :-5

That's just ridiculous.

[

maybe i'll start a thread why does jimbo need to be funny :wah:







Please do that Jimbo. I'd read it:)



But seriously, my mum and I get on great now. When I was a teenager it was not such a good relationship but the best thing I did was leave home. It finally brought it home to her that I was growing up.

I still took washing home though!!



Does anyone else's mum have the ability to say something unitentionally wounding without realising? Mine used to make various comments in passing and some still hurt nearly rwenty years on:(

my younger brother Dan (he had mixed up DNA) used to be the family fav both mom and dads i was always the one that was awkward dslyexia defiance in every breath i took my dad was a bad abuser physically and mentally i never had enough sense to keep my mouth shut

i only came into the world because my dad raped my mom she was 15 and in those days you had to stay together so as you can imagine i was about as popular as a hand grenade with the pin pulled out at the church lucky dip with both of them

we used to live on a pig farm which i used to have to clean out before i went to school we lived on a shack while the house was being built we had no washing facilities except a bowl of cold water you can imagine no matter how i tried i used to stink of pigs crap which made life at school very hard

any way my mom died after i had not seen her in about 10 years and on her death bed in the hospice she told all the others she loved them and she told me I'd always been a bitter disappointment to her

any way my gran loved me

Jimbo

What amazes me again and again

Is how you've turned into a good, loving, productive adult

That's something to be proud of

REALLY proud of :-4

Jimbo, every time you share something very personal you bring a lump to my throat. I really admire that you've got through such hard times with such humour and compassion for others.:-4

Imladris wrote: Jimbo, every time you share something very personal you bring a lump to my throat. I really admire that you've got through such hard times with such humour and compassion for others.:-4
i was determined I'd break the cycle by that i mean my great great grandfather used to beat my great grandad he in turn used to beat my gran who in turn used to beat my father who used to abuse me very very violent and too cruel to even put into words 'they say the abused too often turn out to be the abusers in the long run i did not want that for my kids or even my grand kids one day

i have never smacked my children so they in turn hope fully will not think it natural to smack theirs or abuse them either my sister the one i don't get on with though really is bad to hers so the cycle will continue her son is a very violent boy and is always in trouble for fighting but he is a good kid but its all he has ever known

the thing is i am probably the softest most emotional man ever i always want to help people and me nice but that's just the way i am ,i used to hate it but now i realise its me and i just go with the flow:)

Jimbo, you're so right, it's very easy to follow the example shown by parents good or bad.

My grandfather (who died when I was 5) was sent to a military school as a child where he was forced to live in a brutal regime. he in turn became a bully who used to beat his children and took pleasure in playing one off against the other. My uncle was hit around the head so many times that we're convinced he had brain damage as he found life as an adult very difficult and has never settled long at any one thing.

My mother started following the same route with me until one day my dad (the gentlest, most loving and patient man) pointed out to her that she was turning into her father. I'm so lucky that he did this as my childhood was happy but it could have been so different.

thanks guys yuo da best:-4 :-4

mothers and daughters... wow great topic

I have and always have had the very best relationship with my mom.... I can honestly guarantee anyone who meets her loves her, impossible to not truly love my mom. I could brag an entire novel about her. To sum her up she has an absolutely beautiful heart.

I coud never imagine my life any other way.

As a mother to daughters I have tried to follow my mothers foot steps.... well my circumstances were different and I am afraid I went through a spell where I know I was likely the world's worst mom, especially to BB. BUT on a good note... we recovered, we are awesome friends and her and Jr Minks are fantastic daughters.... why does this all work.... Because I, and they learned from My Mom

Carl44;425565 wrote: i only came into the world because my dad raped my mom


Carl, I was conceived in rape as well. On my website, I have a compilation of uplifting, life-affirming stories of those of us who were conceived in rape. If you search "conceived in rape" you'll find it right away.

I'm so glad you were born!

-- Rebecca

Rebecca_Kiessling;762867 wrote: Carl, I was conceived in rape as well. On my website, I have a compilation of uplifting, life-affirming stories of those of us who were conceived in rape. If you search "conceived in rape" you'll find it right away.



I'm so glad you were born!



-- RebeccaAnd I you Becca :-6

Hi Abbey, thanx! I see that were you "born blessed", so I'm glad to see you already know what a gift you are. What is your story? -- Rebecca