ForumGarden

SnoozeControl wrote: I was reading somewhere that it's sometimes difficult to interact online since so many people have removed any 'polite' filters they use in real life. Okay, that's easy enough to understand and accept to a certain degree... I think we've all had our rude/angry cyber moments.

But what about someone that's mentally/emotionally ill? I've encountered some people that eventually expose a degree of 'different' that makes me sit back and say "wow, that was weird... and kind of scary." :-2

And it's also kind of weird that they seem to gravitate toward me.

So... I was wondering what's the best way to deal with people like that? I have a tendency to avoid unpleasant people, but that doesn't always work.


The nice thing about the internet

Is that it's much easier to back off of someone here than in RL

cherandbuster wrote: The nice thing about the internet

Is that it's much easier to back off of someone here than in RL


Amen to that. At worst, one can switch the computer off and go dancing.

SnoozeControl wrote:

And it's also kind of weird that they seem to gravitate toward me.






I was going to reply but then I thought you might think I'm one too!!:wah:



Seriously I think the problem with conversations like this is that there are no facial expressions or body language to judge. I'm a firm believer in trusting your first impressions on somebody. If I've been concerned about someone or just taken an instant dislike it usually turns out to be for a good reason. Best thing I find is to be firm but polite. But I do have a weirdo magnet, they all seem to think I'm their best friend!!

SnoozeControl wrote: I was reading somewhere that it's sometimes difficult to interact online since so many people have removed any 'polite' filters they use in real life. Okay, that's easy enough to understand and accept to a certain degree... I think we've all had our rude/angry cyber moments.

But what about someone that's mentally/emotionally ill? I've encountered some people that eventually expose a degree of 'different' that makes me sit back and say "wow, that was weird... and kind of scary." :-2

And it's also kind of weird that they seem to gravitate toward me.

So... I was wondering what's the best way to deal with people like that? I have a tendency to avoid unpleasant people, but that doesn't always work.


snoozie i really like you, can i come and live under you porch? where do you live?

what is your phone number? I'm across the street from you right now typing..

:yh_drool :yh_drool

SnoozeControl wrote: (unpleasant people on-line)

So... I was wondering what's the best way to deal with people like that? I have a tendency to avoid unpleasant people, but that doesn't always work.


I'm not sure how they can interact with you online... can't you kill-file 'em, not

"speak" to them, etc.? Can you describe a particular instance of why it's difficult

to avoid them?

Wendybird wrote: But you are my bestest friend! Aren't you?


no bendy she's my bestest friend

i live under her porch until i move to snoozies porch;)

zinkyusa wrote: no bendy she's my bestest friend



i live under her porch until i move to snoozies porch;)


Mmmm.......after all the spider business in Jimbo's thread I'm not sure.

Pinky wrote: I'm a total bitch for taking the juice out of offensive people


I think Snoozie's referring to people who are emotionally or mentally ill here, not just pains in the butt.

It is pretty delicate, because you don't want to be responsible for sending them into a bad or worse place mentally.

I think it's difficult to handle it well.

Imladris wrote: Mmmm.......after all the spider business in Jimbo's thread I'm not sure.


who says you get a vote??

don't make me upset:-3

zinkyusa wrote: who says you get a vote??



don't make me upset:-3


I've just worked out who you are!!



You're the bat that lives in my roof aren't you?



Are you stalking me??

SnoozeControl wrote: I was reading somewhere that it's sometimes difficult to interact online since so many people have removed any 'polite' filters they use in real life. Okay, that's easy enough to understand and accept to a certain degree... I think we've all had our rude/angry cyber moments.

But what about someone that's mentally/emotionally ill? I've encountered some people that eventually expose a degree of 'different' that makes me sit back and say "wow, that was weird... and kind of scary." :-2

And it's also kind of weird that they seem to gravitate toward me.

So... I was wondering what's the best way to deal with people like that? I have a tendency to avoid unpleasant people, but that doesn't always work.


are you sure it could be the other way round:)

We used to have someone here like that. His antics scared me a little.

He really was ill, DG, I guess we're thinking of the same person. I do hope he's been stabilised now. That was kind of sad.

I hope he is better too, but he gave me the creeps. especially that post about freaking out and hearing someone outside, by the way, LOVE your sig line!

I frequented a forum for over a year a while back. There was one person in particular who ws definitely 'off kilter', you could just tell, the histrionics and obviously exaggerated if not completely made up tales. I didn't like her views and opinions consistently but just filed her under 'leave alone'. The problem was, the other members (99% female) really took umbrage at everything she said, took it all personally rather than just thinking 'here's someone with real issues, maybe even a personality disorder. Every time she came on and told a tale or posted something uncomfortable or irritating they descended on her like vultures, searching back posts from years ago or trying to tie her up in knots. You could see her mental health was deteriorating and she did post a few times about her clinical depression, but was she lying? Who knows. What I found more disturbing than her strange personality, was the degree of relish that these average family women took pursuing this individual. One would make a comment and then the rest would swoop in, ripping her apart so to speak. Even the moderators would join in. Sorry to go on, it just really irked me.

SnoozeControl wrote:

And it's also kind of weird that they seem to gravitate toward me.




ok ok ok I get it now, I'll gravitate toward someone else. sheesh...:rolleyes:



:wah:

I do often wonder just how many people are walking around suffering from some kind of mental illness and how many of them don't even know they have it.

I'm trialling the sig line, DG, and it's accompanying filters. In one form or another it is due to be surgically implanted in all new Forum members shortly, and current members will be sanitised in batches - starting with anyone in the sin bin and then I think going in alphabetical order. It's not too bad really. Of course it wouldnt let me pluck a pheasant recently (bloodsports are not PC), which was a bit of a pity. But a small price to pay for peace of mind and a clean, pure, wholesome ForumGarden.

Katy1 wrote: I frequented a forum for over a year a while back. There was one person in particular who ws definitely 'off kilter', you could just tell, the histrionics and obviously exaggerated if not completely made up tales. I didn't like her views and opinions consistently but just filed her under 'leave alone'. The problem was, the other members (99% female) really took umbrage at everything she said, took it all personally rather than just thinking 'here's someone with real issues, maybe even a personality disorder. Every time she came on and told a tale or posted something uncomfortable or irritating they descended on her like vultures, searching back posts from years ago or trying to tie her up in knots. You could see her mental health was deteriorating and she did post a few times about her clinical depression, but was she lying? Who knows. What I found more disturbing that her strange personality, was the degree of relish that these average family women took pursuing this individual. One would make a comment and then the rest would swoop in, ripping her apart so to speak. Even the moderators would join in. Sorry to go on, it just really irked me.


Understandable that it irked you, I think most people feel a degree of compassion for someone with mental health problems. The trouble is that those most in need of help can sometimes be such a drain on support givers that eventually patience wears out.



But they were wong to drag up stuff from past posts, we all need a little escapism from our boring day to day stuff, so what if someone exagerates a little although this was obviously more than a little by the sound of it.

Hamster wrote: Pants 1 in 10 people suffer some form of mental illness throughout their life I think the stats are here in the UK. I found that out when I had my depression.


Ditto with the depression, it can be very isolating thinking that you're the only person suffering.



Mental health problems are not so visible, so it tends to be kept quiet. Not to mention the stigma attached to it.

The line between the mentally stable and unstable is a subjective one. I don't believe in mental illness at all. All thoughts and emotions are chemical and electrical in nature...All illnesses are physical IMO. 100 years ago diabetics were being kept in insane asylums. Some folks just get chemically out of balance nothing more and nothing less. In all seriousness personality disorder or "mental" illness these folks need treatment not scorn..

zinkyusa wrote: The line between the mentally stable and unstable is a subjective one. I don't believe in mental illness at all. All thoughts and emotions are chemical and electrical in nature...All illnesses are physical IMO. 100 years ago diabetics were being kept in insane asylums. Some folks just get chemically out of balance nothing more and nothing less. In all seriousness personality disorder or "mental" illness these folks need treatment not scorn..


Well Zinky I'm not going to get involved in your definitions, but I agree that mental illness needs treatment not scorn. And I do know what I'm talking about.

AussiePam wrote: Well Zinky I'm not going to get involved in your definitions, but I agree that mental illness needs treatment not scorn. And I do know what I'm talking about.


How would you define it Pam?

zinkyusa wrote: The line between the mentally stable and unstable is a subjective one. I don't believe in mental illness at all. All thoughts and emotions are chemical and electrical in nature...All illnesses are physical IMO. 100 years ago diabetics were being kept in insane asylums. Some folks just get chemically out of balance nothing more and nothing less. In all seriousness personality disorder or "mental" illness these folks need treatment not scorn..


Can you explain what you mean a little more Zinks? I think I get what you mean......isn't a mental illness an issue with the chemical/electrical make up/signalling in the brain anyway? Doesn't the term 'mental illness' just refer to the part of the body that isn't functioning as it should, the brain?

Katy1 wrote: Can you explain what you mean a little more Zinks? I think I get what you mean......isn't a mental illness an issue with the chemical/electrical make up/signalling in the brain anyway? Doesn't the term 'mental illness' just refer to the part of the body that isn't functioning as it should, the brain?


I think mental has traditionally referred to the mind, sometimes as if that is different from the brain. People have often judged others who are addicted, depressed, psychotic etc as being "morally" weak or corrupt or some such nonsense. If you want to define mental as referring to brain chemistry and all the associated physiology I am fine with that.





mental Pronunciation Key - Show Spelled Pronunciation[men-tl] Pronunciation Key - Show IPA Pronunciation

–adjective 1. of or pertaining to the mind: mental powers; mental suffering.

2. of, pertaining to, or affected by a disorder of the mind: a mental patient; mental illness.

3. providing care for persons with disordered minds, emotions, etc.: a mental hospital.

4. performed by or existing in the mind: mental arithmetic; a mental note.

5. pertaining to intellectuals or intellectual activity.

6. Informal. slightly daft; out of one's mind; crazy: He's mental.

–noun 7. Informal. a person with a psychological disorder: a fascist group made up largely of mentals.

ok, .............how do you think people with a chemical imbalance that kill should be treated? what about men that prey on children. pediphiles? what about the narcicist personality disorder? it cannot be treated. oppositional diviance disorder, schizophrenia, .....where would you draw the line? it's hard. some of the prisoners that i used to interact with were in jail for killing their kids. but then you look at their bodies and see what their parents did to them. everything but death. where do you draw the line to sympathy??

guppy wrote: ok, .............how do you think people with a chemical imbalance that kill should be treated? what about men that prey on children. pediphiles? what about the narcicist personality disorder? it cannot be treated. oppositional diviance disorder, schizophrenia, .....where would you draw the line? it's hard. some of the prisoners that i used to interact with were in jail for killing their kids. but then you look at their bodies and see what their parents did to them. everything but death. where do you draw the line to sympathy??


Why does there have to be line guppy..You can isolate and treat these people as much as possible without hating them..There should be more hospitals and fewer prisons in this country.

Hamster wrote: Pants 1 in 10 people suffer some form of mental illness throughout their life I think the stats are here in the UK. I found that out when I had my depression.


I have it to

zinkyusa wrote: Why does there have to be line guppy..You can isolate and treat these people as much as possible without hating them..There should be more hospitals and fewer prisons in this country.


Who decides where the lines are drawn. who will decide who needs to be isolated and hospitalized?

the alchoholic who raised his kids in abuse. they in turn grow up and do the same thing, and then on and on..........

the schizophrenic who is extremely paranoid and thinks the world is out to get him, refuses his medication because it is poisoned. He free, white and a man. you cannot do a thing with him. society has progressed to the point that we uphold the mentally ill at the expense of the rest of society.

the incestuous man that molested his kids, they grow up and let their grandkids go around him. the cycle continues.......the grandson ends up killing his grandfather. he is incarcerated. it's not right. the grandfather should have been stopped but society does not recognize or deal with the mentally ill.

the crack addict that trades her body for drugs and has a baby every year by god knows who, social services picks the baby up everytime but does not stop the woman from continuelly producing these innocent children often with mental, physical problems. . they are screwed from the moment they are born.

what about the hiv woman who continues to have children, knowing damn well she has just handed them a death sentence. Our tax money pays for these kids, they have no love, no home, they suffer, they die. it isn't right.

you tell me zinky, where, when , and who should decide when enough is enough?

this is not about hate, it is about when do you draw the line.

guppy wrote: Who decides where the lines are drawn. who will decide who needs to be isolated and hospitalized?

the alchoholic who raised his kids in abuse. they in turn grow up and do the same thing, and then on and on..........

the schizophrenic who is extremely paranoid and thinks the world is out to get him, refuses his medication because it is poisoned. He free, white and a man. you cannot do a thing with him. society has progressed to the point that we uphold the mentally ill at the expense of the rest of society.

the incestuous man that molested his kids, they grow up and let their grandkids go around him. the cycle continues.......the grandson ends up killing his grandfather. he is incarcerated. it's not right. the grandfather should have been stopped but society does not recognize or deal with the mentally ill.

the crack addict that trades her body for drugs and has a baby every year by god knows who, social services picks the baby up everytime but does not stop the woman from continuelly producing these innocent children often with mental, physical problems. . they are screwed from the moment they are born.

what about the hiv woman who continues to have children, knowing damn well she has just handed them a death sentence. Our tax money pays for these kids, they have no love, no home, they suffer, they die. it isn't right.

you tell me zinky, where, when , and who should decide when enough is enough?

this is not about hate, it is about when do you draw the line.


Whoa take a backstroke there guppy. Why are you picking on me? I just mean you shouldn't hate these people. I don't know how to draw the line, what do you propose?

pantsonfire321@aol.com wrote:



I have it to


It's pretty horrible at times, I hope you're getting some help. Here if you need a chat.

Imladris wrote: It's pretty horrible at times, I hope you're getting some help. Here if you need a chat.
Thankyou hunny :-4

Is the tendency to overreact with anger and insults considered "mental illness?"

Lulu2 wrote: Is the tendency to overreact with anger and insults considered "mental illness?"


depends on who you ask. i would say so.........but i am a fish, so what do i know?

what was the guestion?

i have a headache now. can fish take tylenol?????

What about a person who is so filled with hostility that they can't restrain themselves in public?