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How To Outwit A Sasquatch!

Posted: Thu Dec 07, 2006 8:15 pm
by Fibonacci
1. Determine if you’re in Bigfoot territory.

If you’re off the beaten path, in a forested area in a climate that has heavy precipitation, you could be in the proverbial ballpark.





2. Use your senses.

Look: Bigfoots have distinctive five-toed footprints, up to 20 inches long and 7 inches wide.

Listen: Hear any cracking branches, heavy bipedal footfalls or unfamiliar grunts?

Smell: Bigfoots sometimes emit a sickening odor, described as a cross between a dead animal and a wet dog.





3. If you spot a Bigfoot, don’t make prolonged eye contact.

Most sightings have been at a comfortable distance beyond 50 feet. Looking down may be interpreted as a sign of submission; instead, keep him (or her) in your peripheral vision.





4. Fool the sasquatch into thinking you’re another creature of the forest.

Try mimicking the beast’s current behavior — kneel down, eat berries or vegetation — to signal that you’re not a threat.



5. Create a distraction.

Bigfoots are about as intelligent as the great apes in that they do not use fire or tools and are easily distracted. Try throwing a rock or a stick into the forest behind the beast. Do NOT throw anything AT the Bigfoot.





6. Hightail it.

Once you’re out of sight, you can be reasonably sure that you’re out of danger.



Some life saving information!:rolleyes: :wah:

How To Outwit A Sasquatch!

Posted: Thu Dec 07, 2006 8:20 pm
by guppy
thanks for these life saving tips...unfortunantely the chicken poop in me would mean i would shimmy up the nearest tree and make like a bird....:wah: :wah:

How To Outwit A Sasquatch!

Posted: Thu Dec 07, 2006 8:28 pm
by koan
If only I'd had this advice last year. :-1

How To Outwit A Sasquatch!

Posted: Thu Dec 07, 2006 11:11 pm
by WonderWendy3
My nick name when a kid was Bigfoot, so I'm counting on them noticing my big feet and think I'm a lost family member...but thanks for the tips....

How To Outwit A Sasquatch!

Posted: Fri Dec 08, 2006 3:32 pm
by Fibonacci
guppy;479337 wrote: thanks for these life saving tips...unfortunantely the chicken poop in me would mean i would shimmy up the nearest tree and make like a bird....:wah: :wah:


I'd probably just run screaming!



koan;479340 wrote: If only I'd had this advice last year. :-1


Sorry I was so late!



WonderWendy3;479368 wrote: My nick name when a kid was Bigfoot, so I'm counting on them noticing my big feet and think I'm a lost family member...but thanks for the tips....


Hope It works!

How To Outwit A Sasquatch!

Posted: Fri Dec 08, 2006 5:07 pm
by koan
Fibonacci;479991 wrote: I'd probably just run screaming!




I worked on a tv series out in the backwoods for two years. They had a number of bears that were getting used to humans being around. On various occasions, really "helpful" people would try to go over the basics of how to handle bear encounters with me. Invariably, I would cut them off after the first few sentences and say:

I don't care if the bear is black or brown or white. I'm not looking for a fur coat.

If I see a bear I will 1) scream 2) turn around 3) run with my hands clutched over my buttocks.

I appreciate your concern...but I will die. Let's hope I don't meet one.

How To Outwit A Sasquatch!

Posted: Fri Dec 08, 2006 5:36 pm
by ELF
Wow, I believe it!:-2