7 of 12: I Came to Believe
Posted: Tue Jul 03, 2007 1:53 pm
This one leads into Loves Been Good to Me.
Kate walked back into their empty bedroom; it looked like it had been quarantined. She picked up a black and white picture of the three of them; it had been taken shortly after she had gotten back home from the hospital with Wil. That stay had lasted far longer than it should have. She had almost died from complications and Wil had been born with a weak heart. It was almost like he had taken a sadness that surrounded his parents and tried to swallow it down; make it disappear. Kate clutched the framed moment and whispered her Patrick’s name. The sound of her plea was lost in the selfish chatter of the rain that fell in the night; slowly washing everything but the sins of men away.
Kate walked into the kitchen and dug around in a drawer looking for an old pack of smokes she knew Patrick kept for the very bad days; the damn bad days. She thought back six years to when she had first met him. The meeting was by pure chance; she had stumbled and he had caught her before she fell; but not before she could feel. The look he had in his eyes was one of pure mischief shaded by an underlying sepia toned somberness. It had been almost instant; she was a fool for sepia tones. She had managed to twist her ankle and he had put her right arm over his shoulder and walked her to a corner bar; he stayed on the right side of her close to the street. She felt protected and comfortable; in less than one hands fingers worth of minutes that man had made her feel more at ease than she ever had.
Those days were long gone. They were washed away like all the rest of it in the early morning rain; nothing left but the sins. She repeated his name over and over; it was the definition of futility. She couldn’t do this by herself anymore. He might be out doing the things he thought he needed to do to keep them above the flood line, but the shore was eroding and it had finally tumbled into the churning waters with a slow groan and a tremble of the earth. She had laid her troubles down on another man, and look what it had returned.
Kate stood in the kitchen and watched the red ember burn slowly on the end of his hidden away vice. She inhaled deeply and that cherry turned as red as the taunting numbers on the digital clock.
Kate finished her smoke and started to walk to the door that led outside into the coming dawn. She reached for the door handle and faltered; collapsed to the ground and rolled into a ball like a child who had been unfairly punished. She surrendered; finally. She felt twice as alone every day; there must be an easier way. She looked up as she heard the door open; there stood Jonas with a grim look on his weary face. He reached out and placed his hand gently on top of her head. He moved his palm over the top of her aching and troubled thoughts. It felt to her as if he was reaching straight into her crowded mind. “Be still for a moment Kate; feel the help to get you by; it is reaching out in your direction”.
Kate did as he humbly asked her. She had her faith; always had, but like a stubborn mule who refused to move she had always tried to do it all on her own. She begged for strength, begged for sight. She begged for legs to carry her one more mile. She pleaded for one more smile. She apologized for vanity and pride. She let Jonas pick her up and place her on her empty bed. He covered her up; and as he walked out of the room he whispered Patrick’s name.
Jonas let himself out of his old friend’s apartment and limped his way back to his own. He thought back over the years of rambling, of being a rover. He thought about the distances he had metaphorically walked. Miles upon miles. He had never found a home for long, but for the most part he was happy; love had always been good to him. He winced as he saw the lonely future in store for his friend Patrick. He hoped love would be good to him again somewhere further down the road.
KB
Kate walked back into their empty bedroom; it looked like it had been quarantined. She picked up a black and white picture of the three of them; it had been taken shortly after she had gotten back home from the hospital with Wil. That stay had lasted far longer than it should have. She had almost died from complications and Wil had been born with a weak heart. It was almost like he had taken a sadness that surrounded his parents and tried to swallow it down; make it disappear. Kate clutched the framed moment and whispered her Patrick’s name. The sound of her plea was lost in the selfish chatter of the rain that fell in the night; slowly washing everything but the sins of men away.
Kate walked into the kitchen and dug around in a drawer looking for an old pack of smokes she knew Patrick kept for the very bad days; the damn bad days. She thought back six years to when she had first met him. The meeting was by pure chance; she had stumbled and he had caught her before she fell; but not before she could feel. The look he had in his eyes was one of pure mischief shaded by an underlying sepia toned somberness. It had been almost instant; she was a fool for sepia tones. She had managed to twist her ankle and he had put her right arm over his shoulder and walked her to a corner bar; he stayed on the right side of her close to the street. She felt protected and comfortable; in less than one hands fingers worth of minutes that man had made her feel more at ease than she ever had.
Those days were long gone. They were washed away like all the rest of it in the early morning rain; nothing left but the sins. She repeated his name over and over; it was the definition of futility. She couldn’t do this by herself anymore. He might be out doing the things he thought he needed to do to keep them above the flood line, but the shore was eroding and it had finally tumbled into the churning waters with a slow groan and a tremble of the earth. She had laid her troubles down on another man, and look what it had returned.
Kate stood in the kitchen and watched the red ember burn slowly on the end of his hidden away vice. She inhaled deeply and that cherry turned as red as the taunting numbers on the digital clock.
Kate finished her smoke and started to walk to the door that led outside into the coming dawn. She reached for the door handle and faltered; collapsed to the ground and rolled into a ball like a child who had been unfairly punished. She surrendered; finally. She felt twice as alone every day; there must be an easier way. She looked up as she heard the door open; there stood Jonas with a grim look on his weary face. He reached out and placed his hand gently on top of her head. He moved his palm over the top of her aching and troubled thoughts. It felt to her as if he was reaching straight into her crowded mind. “Be still for a moment Kate; feel the help to get you by; it is reaching out in your direction”.
Kate did as he humbly asked her. She had her faith; always had, but like a stubborn mule who refused to move she had always tried to do it all on her own. She begged for strength, begged for sight. She begged for legs to carry her one more mile. She pleaded for one more smile. She apologized for vanity and pride. She let Jonas pick her up and place her on her empty bed. He covered her up; and as he walked out of the room he whispered Patrick’s name.
Jonas let himself out of his old friend’s apartment and limped his way back to his own. He thought back over the years of rambling, of being a rover. He thought about the distances he had metaphorically walked. Miles upon miles. He had never found a home for long, but for the most part he was happy; love had always been good to him. He winced as he saw the lonely future in store for his friend Patrick. He hoped love would be good to him again somewhere further down the road.
KB