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This is a serious thread, I need to know what really really scares a control freak, and please not the obvious of not being in control, what makes them feel this way.

Are you perhaps asking what motivates someone to be a control freak?

Erin

Indian Princess;689239 wrote: This is a serious thread, I need to know what really really scares a control freak, and please not the obvious of not being in control, what makes them feel this way.


Somewhere in their childhood, they lived in chaos. Probably somewhere in the first five to six years. Most likley they were also abused either physically or mentally.

Abuse could be such things as hugs and kisses one moment and pain and anger the next to neglect to sexual depravation.

Ind P

Your not afraid of someone are you? your OK ?

A control freak really is one insecure person, feels a status by controling others with their dominate personality

I avoid them

Patsy

it scares a control freak when you stand up to them..make a request of them...

That's exactly it... anyone with control issues, feels that they have no control.

The other thing about control freaks is that when do DO stand up to them they get more angry hoping to back you down. Do not ever back down. You get respect after about a week. If you don't.........freaking LEAVE!!!!!!!

What scares them most are other control freaks, in my experience.

magenta flame;689367 wrote: Huh I was just about to say that gall



what sacares them is someone who stands up to them and takes control of exactly what they feel they should control ........which is usually their environment ............and if you are within their environment then it means you too....so you take control of yourself and those around you and it scares them half to death ...........they usually are extremely insecure people who need to control everything around them to convince themselves they have some kind of importance, they are needed and everything will fall apart if they do not have a grip on things. Without the control they become depressed, will often lash out or sometimes become suicidal. they think they will be branded failures and this frightens them the most. it's very sociopathic behaviour and they prefer to systimatically destroy the environment they control rather than hand the reins over to someone else.




good post mag..:-6

Noone can have total control unless you choose to give it to them. You usually don't notice it at first. You regain control over your life the same way they did. Slowly, one step at a time, never backing down.

But they are fun to play with if you don't live with them.

I work with one and she has to have the journal book in the exact middle of the table. When she is not looking, I move it two inches to the edge. This can go on all day.

magenta flame;689367 wrote: Huh I was just about to say that gall

what sacares them is someone who stands up to them and takes control of exactly what they feel they should control ........which is usually their environment ............and if you are within their environment then it means you too....so you take control of yourself and those around you and it scares them half to death ...........they usually are extremely insecure people who need to control everything around them to convince themselves they have some kind of importance, they are needed and everything will fall apart if they do not have a grip on things. Without the control they become depressed, will often lash out or sometimes become suicidal. they think they will be branded failures and this frightens them the most. it's very sociopathic behaviour and they prefer to systimatically destroy the environment they control rather than hand the reins over to someone else.


Awesome Post Magenta, and described the Ex husband to the TEE!! The other thing is that they never ever will recognize that they are a control freak, everyone else has a problem, they are perfect! I had to work and work to make him happy until I realized, there was NO such thing....:-5

Peg;689380 wrote: Noone can have total control unless you choose to give it to them. You usually don't notice it at first. You regain control over your life the same way they did. Slowly, one step at a time, never backing down. I agree Peg, its hard though, because the get the control without you realizing it at first, its masked as love sometimes.....