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jimbo;840542 wrote:





so to anyone who ever needed a drink did you end up drinking and did it help ????
Often and never.

I'm so sorry for your pain Jim. :yh_flower

Jimbo you dont have to be strong all the time. let the hurt come through and cry it all part of healing. Yes I have hit the drink especially when my beloved parents died....did it help....NO. I feel for you Jimbo :-4

it dosnt take much to set me off........ a song on the radio, finding something of my late partners in a drawer that i thought had long gone................ its been three years now !!

the most recent ?? his best friend turned up where i work a few weeks ago, havnt seen him since the funeral, and it was like the last 12yrs of my life had been wiped out and i expected my barrie to walk in behind him and when he didnt, i totally lost the plot altogether.

no the drink dosnt help cos the next day you have a hole in your pocket where your money used to be and you are on intimate terms with the inside of your toilet !!

and the one you're grieving over is still gone........................

Whatever you do, don't turn to drink. It's not a solution to anything and as hard as it is now, it is better to deal with the pain and in a sober way. Alcohol is a major depressant and it will only make everything worse.

The good thing is that this is probably the worst that you will feel and you are strong and good and will survive this too. Maybe if you talk to somebody independant from it, a counsellor or a doc they will be able to lend you a trained ear and give you some good advice. Be patient with yourself and be good to yourself. Do things you like and distract yourself too. Unfortunately we can't change the past but we are in charge of our futures. Love to you. :-4

I can’t even begin to relate to what you must have gone through. I can only offer you support and friendship and hope that you can stay strong. There are greater things to fight for.

you'll make it through, jimbo

I used to watch stand up comedy when I was having tough times, the high of laughter is much more rewarding and lasts longer than boozing.

:yh_hugs Jimbo :yh_hugs

To answer your question, "No, drinking to oblivion doesn't help." I'm sure you already know this.

Most of the time, I'm cool and go about my life with relative ease. But, once in awhile, a memory returns that hurts my heart. I cry. The tears help to wash it away for awhile. Then I get up again and go on with it.

The ride of life does get bumpy sometimes, but I try to keep my hands on the wheel and my eyes on the road I'm travelling. Looking in that rear-view mirror is necessary, but I don't have to look all the time. Where you've been takes you to where you are now. Remember, Jimbo, you are never travelling alone.........you have your buddies along for the ride.

If you try to drink the pain away, your brother will still be gone, you'll still be sad, and you'll end up feeling like crap on top of it all.

Can I be honest Jimbo ?

I shall take the silence as a yes then...........

I thought you was the forum Clown, a Jack the lad, one of them irritating people who are always a laugh a minute......a Knobhead.

I see another side now.

I visit your posts to see if I can give a one liner......to top you.....

Dont think I have posted to any of your posts......until now....could be wrong....dont keep a score, and my memory is *****.

I was deeply moved......as moved as you can be by an anonymous post by a stranger on a web forum. .....not so anonymous I suppose.....as I have read your contributions for some time now.....who keeps score ?

If you feel the need to get pie eyed.....do it.

Just dont rely on it.

It might loosen you up enough to release all that pent up......whatever.

You......and..... I.....are too English.....stiff upper lip etc. etc.

It WILL take time.........Dont beat yourself up......you have many people's thoughts........

All my best wishes to you and yours......

Have I said too much ?

Bruv, he talk much good sense.

Jimbo:-4

To answer your question (even though you've already said you feel better, you know me, gotta give my 2.5 cents!!--inflation:wah:

I am not a drinker, not even when times get really tough....I EAT and SLEEP when depressed....

I know that the loss of your brother was painful and you probably pushed some of the grieving process away by trying to drink it away last time, and now its come back to be dealt with....I know I have pushed and blocked and ignored painful feelings in order to get through the tough times, and they need to be addressed, you need to grieve and work through the "icky" stuff...for lack of better terms.

I hope that made sense, it always makes sense to me!:rolleyes::o

I don't know if walking or playing a sport helps, but it would be better than drinkin'!!....

You are in my prayers my sweet friend:-4

jimbo;840542 wrote: for the first time in a few years i have woken up feeling the need to get drunk very drunk indeed i have felt the urge to ring my cuz jes and get him to take the day off and take me to a bar and fill me with jack daniels until i pass out ... why ... because thats what i do when i cant deal with pain





a strange thing happened yesterday as i was looking through my charred remains in the van my mind went time traveling back in time four years back until i was at my brother casey's when he had just died in a house fire



the smell , the feeling of wet soaking belonging seeing precious photo's too burnt to keep yet some still to recognisable and important to throw away



yes i went back four years in time and i folded i broke down not because of my van though to be honest its very painful ,but after years of trying to bury the pain of a very much loved ones death i was there again i realised i have not healed at all i have just blocked it out





so to anyone who ever needed a drink did you end up drinking and did it help ????


Yes I did and while it felt god at the time - didn't really help

I'm sorry that you're going through a rough time Jimbo :-4

I'm sorry for your loss. In the past 10 days I lost 3 old friends. All of them younger than myself. I'm finding that the downside of getting old is outliving all your friends.

I've always been a heavy drinker so I don't know the answer to your question. I doubt that it helps. Prayer seems to do me much more good.

so to anyone who ever needed a drink did you end up drinking and did it help ????


Used to Jimbo. Morning noon and night.

Got a problem ?...Jim Beam's got the answer.

The 1st few dull the pain, lets you sink into the warm smooth place where nothing can get you. Nice place to be if you ask me, kind of like a cocoon.

The few after that get you into that next place pretty quick because your slamming them down. Youre running but the pain is right behind you so buy another round and tell a few jokes but the son of a bitch is on your shoulder now.

Now your really drunk and you still feel crappy but the bottles still half full. Might as well finish what you started.

Well you know how it ends up.



I still have pain my friend but Im coping with it a little better these days.

When Im sober Im clear. When Im clear Im strong. When Im strong I keep moving ahead.

Mainly thats what Im interested in, moving ahead.

Instead of drinking take along drive...........umm scratch that.

Sorry your van was torched.

librtyhead;841517 wrote: Instead of drinking take along drive...........umm scratch that.

Sorry your van was torched.




SNAP !

librtyhead;841517 wrote: Instead of drinking take along drive...........umm scratch that.

Sorry your van was torched.


Nomad;841514 wrote: Used to Jimbo. Morning noon and night.

Got a problem ?...Jim Beam's got the answer.

The 1st few dull the pain, lets you sink into the warm smooth place where nothing can get you. Nice place to be if you ask me, kind of like a cocoon.

The few after that get you into that next place pretty quick because your slamming them down. Youre running but the pain is right behind you so buy another round and tell a few jokes but the son of a bitch is on your shoulder now.

Now your really drunk and you still feel crappy but the bottles still half full. Might as well finish what you started.

Well you know how it ends up.



I still have pain my friend but Im coping with it a little better these days.

When Im sober Im clear. When Im clear Im strong. When Im strong I keep moving ahead.

Mainly thats what Im interested in, moving ahead.


Your great Jimbo and you know that your a stronger person than you was and you will get through this better than the last time. You also have Suzy so how could you possibly fail...Then you have amazing guys on here who all got your back buddy............Feel good in the knowledge that your truly blessed my friend...

p.s. I had to quote Liberty as his post made me chuckle and dear gorgeous Nomads made me nearly cry........Amazing isnt it:-6

jennyswan;840567 wrote: Whatever you do, don't turn to drink. It's not a solution to anything and as hard as it is now, it is better to deal with the pain and in a sober way. Alcohol is a major depressant and it will only make everything worse.

The good thing is that this is probably the worst that you will feel and you are strong and good and will survive this too. Maybe if you talk to somebody independant from it, a counsellor or a doc they will be able to lend you a trained ear and give you some good advice. Be patient with yourself and be good to yourself. Do things you like and distract yourself too. Unfortunately we can't change the past but we are in charge of our futures. Love to you. :-4Wise words there Winkle and very very true...........listen to them and trust me drink is not the answer and as Jenny has said it will only make things worse.........Thinking of you and Suzy babe;)

jimbo;840542 wrote: for the first time in a few years i have woken up feeling the need to get drunk very drunk indeed i have felt the urge to ring my cuz jes and get him to take the day off and take me to a bar and fill me with jack daniels until i pass out ... why ... because thats what i do when i cant deal with pain





a strange thing happened yesterday as i was looking through my charred remains in the van my mind went time traveling back in time four years back until i was at my brother casey's when he had just died in a house fire



the smell , the feeling of wet soaking belonging seeing precious photo's too burnt to keep yet some still to recognisable and important to throw away



yes i went back four years in time and i folded i broke down not because of my van though to be honest its very painful ,but after years of trying to bury the pain of a very much loved ones death i was there again i realised i have not healed at all i have just blocked it out





so to anyone who ever needed a drink did you end up drinking and did it help ????
I don't think I've ever been there, Jim. Sounds like hell. I'm glad you're strong enough to resist it. :yh_flower

Jimbo I know you slept the need for booze off and are moving ahead that is great. :-4 I can't imagine the pain you felt when your brother died. It will come rushing back everytime you smell a fire so now you know it will happen and hopefully the next time you can let the pain out and then remember the best times you had with your Brother. :-4

Us ladies just cry ourselves out at times like this, we just sob till we have such a headache we can't cry another second. It works..!! :yh_hugs

Jimbo, not much can be added to all the wise advise you have already received from your FG family. I would just like to extend my sympathy to you as well, and also wish that you find contentment. Stay strong, you will overcome!

*releases pigeons* :yh_devil

jimbo;842000 wrote: well my melt down is over for now





i am going back on the wagon no more drink for jimbo for a few months i did not drown out the hurt but i numbed it for a while and thats what i needed i went out with del yesterday and a few buddies its impossible to be depressed round these guys :wah:





thanks for all your kind replies and to any one going through a bad time its ok to have a melt down now and again , its ok to admit that you are not invincible that you are human



its no good being a lump of rock if you dont feel pain then how are you going to understand someone elses hurt



any way its the constant abrasion that make the pebble on the beach so smooth and round and lovelly to hold





and its the constant hammering from the sculptures hammer and chisle that make a beautifull statue ,the beautiful statue was always in there it took the abrasion and the hammering to reveal my true inner beauty :wah:



so now i'm a beautifull statue just waiting for lifes pigeons to crap all over me :wah:





spell checker not working


Hey ho. It's not all bad: there's a poem in there if you want to dig it out!

jimbo;842008 wrote: tosser :wah::wah:


:) Glad to see normal service being resumed.:wah:

jimbo;842008 wrote: tosser :wah::wah:
You're right. I apologize.



*tosses pigeons*

jimbo;842012 wrote: er buddy you really have no idea what tosser and tosses means in slang english do you :yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl





you must never ever .. ever ever use the words tosser and or tosses in the same sentance as any animal ..... or man for that matter :wah:





thanks for the chuckle
I lived in England for about 3 years while in the Air Force. I love the puns you can make out of mixing our different slangs.



I had one Brit that worked for me - well, received a paycheck, anyway. More than once when I gave him a task to do he'd give me your famous two-fingered salute (same as flipping the bird, for those Americans that don't know). I would always respond with "Okay, you can do it twice if you really want to." :sneaky:

Acc: Not on A10s in the East Midlands by any chance? Used to see your boys practicing in the valleys round where I lived (I'm told the terrain is very similar to Northern Germany) - so slow and quiet!

Clodhopper;842017 wrote: Acc: Not on A10s in the East Midlands by any chance? Used to see your boys practicing in the valleys round where I lived (I'm told the terrain is very similar to Northern Germany) - so slow and quiet!
RAF Greenham Common near Newbury. It was a cruise missile base until I helped close it.

Acc: I remember the reports of the Women's Peace Camp. :wah: Must have been quite an introduction to British life!

Clodhopper;842023 wrote: Acc: I remember the reports of the Women's Peace Camp. :wah: Must have been quite an introduction to British life!
:wah: Yup! The missiles were gone by the time I'd arrived, and only a few hangers-on stayed camped outside the base. They were a dedicated few, though! LOL