ForumGarden

Posted: **Mon Jun 23, 2008 10:03 am**

An older woman will never wake you up in the middle of the night and ask you, "What are you thinking?" An older woman doesn't care what you think.

An older woman is a cheaper date. A younger woman will cost you 12 beers, but an older woman will sleep with you after a cup of herbal tea.

An older woman can wear bright red lipstick during the day without looking like she just had an adventure inside a jam jar.

Older women can run faster because they're always wearing sensible shoes.

An older woman is almost always already attached to someone, so there's no need to develop a phobia about committing to her. The last thing she needs in her life is another clingy, whiny, dependent man.

Older women are more honest. An older woman will tell you that you are a jerk if you're acting like one. A young woman will say nothing, fearing you might get mad and break up with her.

An older woman always carries a condom in her purse. A younger woman is still hoping the guy might have one on him.

An older woman will never get pregnant, then suddenly demand that the two of you get married. In fact, if you impregnate an older woman, you will probably be the last to know.

Older women have jobs with dental plans. Younger women can't help you when your teeth get knocked out playing hockey.

Older women take charge of the situation. An older woman will call you up and ask you for a date. A younger woman will wait forever by the phone for you to call.

An older woman will agree to go to McDonald's with you for a meal. Younger women are too nervous to eat anything in front of somebody whom they might screw later.

Older women know how to cook. Young women know how to dial Pizza Hut take out.

Older women are psychic. You never have to confess to having an affair, because somehow they always know.

Older women often own an interesting collection of lingerie that they have acquired from admirers over the years. Young women often don't wear underpants at all, thus practically eliminating all possibility of a striptease.

Older women are dignified. They are beyond having a screaming match with you in the middle of the night in a public park.

Older women are experienced. They understand that sometimes, after 12 beers, a guy just can't get it up. A younger woman may need some time to grasp this fact.

An older woman will introduce you to all of her girlfriends. A younger woman will avoid her girlfriends when she's with you, in case you get any ideas.

An older woman has lots of girlfriends ... and most of them will want to screw you too.

An older woman will always meet the minimum height requirement to go on an amusement ride.

An older woman will never accuse you of stealing the best years of her youth because chances are someone else has stolen them first.

An older woman will never accuse you of using her. She's using you.

Posted: **Mon Jun 23, 2008 10:22 am**

AMEN every word is true..!! :wah::wah:

[QUOTE]Older women can run faster because they're always wearing sensible shoes.

An older woman will never accuse you of using her. She's using you.

An older woman has lots of girlfriends ... and most of them will want to screw you too. [/QUOTE]

:D:D TRUE

Posted: **Mon Jun 23, 2008 10:39 am**

Older women are more honest. An older woman will tell you that you are a jerk if you're acting like one. A young woman will say nothing, fearing you might get mad and break up with her.

Older women are psychic. You never have to confess to having an affair, because somehow they always know.

An older woman will never accuse you of stealing the best years of her youth because chances are someone else has stolen them first.

:wah::wah::wah: these are my favorite!

but Jj what age is actually considered an older woman?

Posted: **Mon Jun 23, 2008 10:41 am**

Older Women Make Better Lovers, Don't They?

God, I hope so. All the women that will talk to me these days, are older women.

Posted: **Mon Jun 23, 2008 10:54 am**

:-4Hope6;896192 wrote: Older women are more honest. An older woman will tell you that you are a jerk if you're acting like one. A young woman will say nothing, fearing you might get mad and break up with her.

Older women are psychic. You never have to confess to having an affair, because somehow they always know.

An older woman will never accuse you of stealing the best years of her youth because chances are someone else has stolen them first.

:wah::wah::wah: these are my favorite!

but Jj what age is actually considered an older woman?

now now honey ... i never got this far in life by telling women what age is considered "older"!

but i would guess about .... maybe ... more or less ... plus or minus ... give or

take ... say ........................ (forty!)

Jj

Posted: **Mon Jun 23, 2008 10:54 am**

CARLA;896176 wrote: AMEN every word is true..!! :wah::wah:

:D:D TRUE

Ain't that the truth:wah:

Posted: **Mon Jun 23, 2008 11:01 am**

jones jones;896207 wrote: :-4

now now honey ... i never got this far in life by telling women what age is considered "older"!

but i would guess about .... maybe ... more or less ... plus or minus ... give or

take ... say ........................ (forty!)

Jj

noooooo darlin!

what i mean is how much older she needs to be than the man to be considered an older woman! :wah::wah:

Posted: **Mon Jun 23, 2008 11:20 am**

Hope6;896219 wrote: noooooo darlin!

what i mean is how much older she needs to be than the man to be considered an older woman! :wah::wah:

At least 10 yrs.:wah:

Posted: **Mon Jun 23, 2008 11:56 am**

I guess it doesn't count that I'm older than hubby by 8 months?:wah:

Posted: **Mon Jun 23, 2008 12:46 pm**

qsducks;896233 wrote: At least 10 yrs.:wah:

oh okay!

so if i want me an younger man, i've got to look for one at least 10 years younger, i'll keep that in mind! :sneaky: :wah::wah:

Posted: **Mon Jun 23, 2008 12:57 pm**

Age is just a number, there is a spark or there isn't, as simple as that!

Older men have advantages and disadvantages, younger men have advantages and disadvantages it's all about balance...............

The older guys have less of it

:wah::wah:

Posted: **Mon Jun 23, 2008 12:58 pm**

Hope6;896292 wrote: oh okay!

so if i want me an younger man, i've got to look for one at least 10 years younger, i'll keep that in mind! :sneaky: :wah::wah:

That's your call:wah:

Posted: **Mon Jun 23, 2008 1:12 pm**

Betty Boop;896296 wrote: Age is just a number, there is a spark or there isn't, as simple as that!

Older men have advantages and disadvantages, younger men have advantages and disadvantages it's all about balance...............

The older guys have less of it

:wah::wah:

:wah::wah: well i don't think i want an older guy, but i wouldn't rule anything out, like you said there has to be a spark, and i guess that could happen with any age

Posted: **Mon Jun 23, 2008 1:15 pm**

Hope6;896301 wrote: :wah::wah: well i don't think i want an older guy, but i wouldn't rule anything out, like you said there has to be a spark, and i guess that could happen with any age

Ummm, thinking

:wah: You better rule out anybody under the age of consent.

Posted: **Mon Jun 23, 2008 1:43 pm**

Oh Yeah---------like a fine wine.

Posted: **Mon Jun 23, 2008 1:45 pm**

They don't tell.

They don't swell.

And they are grateful as hell.

Posted: **Mon Jun 23, 2008 6:12 pm**

qsducks;896302 wrote: Ummm, thinking

:wah: You better rule out anybody under the age of consent.

I'm thinking maybe somewhere around 25! :sneaky::wah::wah:

Posted: **Mon Jun 23, 2008 6:23 pm**

"Better" is such a damning word...

I would have used..."enlightening"...

BTW...I'm 26...:sneaky::wah::wah:

Posted: **Mon Jun 23, 2008 6:39 pm**

K.Snyder;896469 wrote: "Better" is such a damning word...

I would have used..."enlightening"...

BTW...I'm 26...:sneaky::wah:

OMG!!! :sneaky: :-4

:wah::wah:

Posted: **Mon Jun 23, 2008 6:49 pm**

Hope6;896477 wrote: OMG!!! :sneaky: :-4

:wah:

Did you see yourself in the mirror or something and couldn't help but notice how gorgeous you are?...Is that what the "OMG!!!" was about?...:sneaky::wah::wah:

Posted: **Mon Jun 23, 2008 6:58 pm**

K.Snyder;896483 wrote: Did you see yourself in the mirror or something and couldn't help but notice how gorgeous you are?...Is that what the "OMG!!!" was about?...:sneaky::wah::wah:

hmmmmmmm........... well aren't you the flatterer! :sneaky: :wah:

gorgeous isn't a word i would ever use to describe myself but thank you!

Posted: **Mon Jun 23, 2008 7:00 pm**

Hope6;896485 wrote: hmmmmmmm........... well aren't you the flatterer! :sneaky: :wah:

gorgeous isn't a word i would ever use to describe myself but thank you!

I would...:yh_bigsmi...:yh_kiss...

Posted: **Mon Jun 23, 2008 7:24 pm**

K.Snyder;896486 wrote: I would...:yh_bigsmi...:yh_kiss...

awwwwwwww well thank you! :-6

Posted: **Mon Jun 23, 2008 8:14 pm**

Hope6;896301 wrote: :wah::wah: well i don't think i want an older guy, but i wouldn't rule anything out, like you said there has to be a spark, and i guess that could happen with any age

oh blessed mother of pearl then there will still be hope for me in the seniors home eh? :wah:

Posted: **Mon Jun 23, 2008 8:17 pm**

minks;896531 wrote:

oh blessed mother of pearl then there will still be hope for me in the seniors home eh? :wah:

:wah::wah::wah: a couple recently got married around here, they were both in the nursing home , and in their 90's! :-6

Posted: **Mon Jun 23, 2008 8:33 pm**

Hope6;896533 wrote: :wah::wah::wah: a couple recently got married around here, they were both in the nursing home , and in their 90's! :-6

oh Fabo...

:-2 I think heheh aw actually that is cool isn't it.

Posted: **Mon Jun 23, 2008 8:38 pm**

minks;896538 wrote: oh Fabo...

:-2 I think heheh aw actually that is cool isn't it.

i actually thought it was cool yeah, both had lost their spouses, they died and now to find someone again. very cool!

Posted: **Mon Jun 23, 2008 10:24 pm**

Hope6;896292 wrote: oh okay!

so if i want me an younger man, i've got to look for one at least 10 years younger, i'll keep that in mind! :sneaky: :wah::wah:

how about only 2?

Posted: **Mon Jun 23, 2008 10:29 pm**

jones jones;896557 wrote: how about only 2?

Hey that'll work for me too! :sneaky: :-4

Posted: **Mon Jun 23, 2008 10:37 pm**

Hope6;896559 wrote: Hey that'll work for me too! :sneaky: :-4

thought it might! (Jj says ... marking HIS territory) :-4

Posted: **Mon Jun 23, 2008 10:45 pm**

jones Jones;896562 wrote: thought It Might! (jj Says ... Marking His Territory) :-4

:-4:-4:-4:-4

Posted: **Tue Jun 24, 2008 11:25 am**

Before Sunset;897210 wrote: Have you two met yet? Maybe it's time to meet. :wah:

we already have honey ... jeez you don't think i'd flirt like this with a complete

stranger! :-4

Posted: **Tue Jun 24, 2008 12:04 pm**

jones jones;897223 wrote: we already have honey ... jeez you don't think i'd flirt like this with a complete

stranger! :-4

just kidding! no we have not met ... and yes .... sigh ... i do flirt with completely strange ladies!! :wah:

Posted: **Tue Jun 24, 2008 12:08 pm**

jones jones;897271 wrote: just kidding! no we have not met ... and yes .... sigh ... i do flirt with completely strange ladies!! :wah:

Watch out he is a major flirt:wah:

Posted: **Tue Jun 24, 2008 12:09 pm**

jones jones;897271 wrote: just kidding! no we have not met ... and yes .... sigh ... i do flirt with completely strange ladies!! :wah:

ummmmmmmmmmmmm.........Jj? who are you calling strange!

Posted: **Tue Jun 24, 2008 12:14 pm**

Hope6;897280 wrote: ummmmmmmmmmmmm.........Jj? who are you calling strange!

not like in weird strange georgia ... strange as in strangers ... not that you are a stranger but ... excuse me ... what was the questions again? :-3

Posted: **Tue Jun 24, 2008 12:20 pm**

jones jones;897286 wrote: not like in weird strange georgia ... strange as in strangers ... not that you are a stranger but ... excuse me ... what was the questions again? :-3

:wah::wah::wah::wah: are you confused darlin! :wah:

Posted: **Tue Jun 24, 2008 12:26 pm**

Hope6;897296 wrote: :wah::wah::wah::wah: are you confused darlin! :wah:

yes ... who hit me where??? :wah:

Posted: **Tue Jun 24, 2008 12:30 pm**

jones jones;897304 wrote: yes ... who hit me where??? :wah:

nobody! Hope says innocently as she hides frying pan behind her back! :sneaky:

Posted: **Tue Jun 24, 2008 12:33 pm**

Hope6;897313 wrote: nobody! Hope says innocently as she hides frying pan behind her back! :sneaky:

Oh my!:sneaky:

Posted: **Tue Jun 24, 2008 4:31 pm**

they are only having their usual fun & games:wah:

Posted: **Tue Jun 24, 2008 4:32 pm**

Hope6;897313 wrote: nobody! Hope says innocently as she hides frying pan behind her back! :sneaky:

Where is that dang frying pan! :p

Posted: **Tue Jun 24, 2008 6:24 pm**

I had to confiscate it.:wah:

Posted: **Tue Jun 24, 2008 11:44 pm**

Before Sunset;897465 wrote: Getting kinda violent in here. :wah:

nooooo........ it's all in fun! :wah:

i would never hurt Jj!!!........

...........................:sneaky:

Posted: **Tue Jun 24, 2008 11:46 pm**

Mustang;897491 wrote: Where is that dang frying pan! :p

I'll never tell!

:sneaky: :wah:

Posted: **Tue Jun 24, 2008 11:48 pm**

qsducks;897675 wrote: I had to confiscate it.:wah:

psst! Ducky! (Hope whispers) i'll get it back from you later! :sneaky: