ForumGarden

For me, it depends on the situation. Sometimes, an immediate response is in order. But, I don't like to just react. I want the issue resolved. So I may wait a while, calm down, do some thinking, and then express myself. Sometimes, this is difficult to do....but, for me, more effective than "flying off the handle." Maybe I do this because I'm "older and wiser."

Go for a good long walk - whilst I'm walking I resolve *my* issues and then, when I'm back, I can discuss the real issues without my problems getting in the way.

I am one of the lucky ones who lets things go...easily.

I used to let things bother me alot and they'd bottle up until I wanted to explode. Now I know how to prioritize the importance of issues in life. And how little these issues I used to worry about are so insignificant compared to many other, more important issues in the world.

I let things go! i have no temper, i hardly ever get mad, i'm something unique to most folks around here because they can never remember seeing me angry,

but i just see the positive side to everything and my faith helps me to hold on to the idea that everything turns out as it should in the end! and worrying only gives you high blood pressure!

When I was your age I had a "suitcase packed full of mentally unstable emotional garbage' and I guarded that case like it was fort Knox. And the heavier it got and the fuller it was the closer I guarded it. and justified my actions as strength and self reliability and was proud of myself .

What it took for me to finally stand back and take a real and scary look at the reality of my life was nothing much more than one day setting up and taking notice of my daughter becoming the same kind of woman her momma was. One day when she was about 10 or 11 years old , I over heard her telling a friend of hers about her strength and self reliability ya da ya da ya da and she was quoting me almost word for word , I busted out with some thing about how she didn't have a clue about how the real world worked if she thought that was the right way to act or think. Children make wonderful mirrors or to put it in other words Boy did I feel about 1/2 an inch high.

Now almost 20 years later ,when something gets up close and personal . I make sure first decide if it is worth my time and energy and deal with it according

I let things go. Just look at the surgeon I had. I let him operate 4 times, still not better, actually worse! Now I am going to another surgeon to see if he can fix this. I hold no grudge on first surgeon. That is the way I am.

I learnt about this the hard way. The way I was brought up, I learnt to keep my feelings in and push them aside in favour of someone else's. No fault of my parents, they didn't know.

I now know that it is better to express them politely as soon as possible when the opportunity arises or by creating the opportunity. My feelings are as important as anyone else's, after all. This works. No one is hurt and a solution can be worked out.

If they are not expressed properly, they just build up until something bursts.

mindindistress;1139422 wrote: how do you deal with your feelings? do you bury deep down and wait to explode? do you deal with what your feeling as you are feeling it? can you just let things go? and if you are one of the lucky ones able to just let things go, how do you do it?:-3


I let things go very easily. I don't hold grudges against people who have wronged me and I don't think about all the bad things that have been done to me in the past. I feel anger, yes, but I don't express it outwardly as whenever I do ( which is only once in a very, very long time), I usually end up saying the wrong thing which hurts the other person a great deal so now I keep my mouth shut when I'm upset or angry.

However, if I do trust the other person a great deal, I do eventually let them know that they have hurt me with their words or actions and see how they react to that. If they're apologetic and seem to be sorry for what they did or try to change for the better, then my close relationship with them still stays intact. If they seem not to care about hurting me, then they're no longer my close friends but distant friends or acquaintances instead. However, if I really can't avoid that person ( such as a boss, a co-worker, a relative, etc.) then I try to be as kind as possible and not let their attitudes bother me. I just tell myself that's just the way they are and I just have to accept them like that because they can't change.

I dunno but this reminds me of Moses.

He was a co-worker. We were a construction crew and sometimes he would help the painter.

You could hear him in the next room singing ceeeilings wo wo wo ceeeilings.....

Nomad;1147723 wrote: I dunno but this reminds me of Moses.

He was a co-worker. We were a construction crew and sometimes he would help the painter.

You could hear him in the next room singing ceeeilings wo wo wo ceeeilings.....


I nearly let out a little weeeeeee:yh_rotfl

Chezzie;1147725 wrote: I nearly let out a little weeeeeee:yh_rotfl


You tinkled ?

I seldom get angry. Guess I do hold things in at times. I like to rethink what it was that made me angry to start with and see if there is a way to confront the issue in an adult fashion instead of shooting off my mouth. Anger never resolved anything, it only makes things worse. So many times, things said in anger, continue to hurt and cause hard feeling between you and the person you spouted off too, and can't be taken back.

Nomad;1147728 wrote: You tinkled ?


nearly, your not THAT funny :wah: