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since this subject has come up, what are some things you need to have one for?



talking on the phone

after a meal

on fg

going to the doctors office

while drinking alcohol

when i am angry or nervous

socialising

with another smoker

kayleneaussie;1143580 wrote: when i am angry or nervous

socialising

with another smoker


those are with me also.

[QUOTE=Odie;1143577]since this subject has come up, what are some things you need to have one for?



alking on the phone ----------chew some gum

after a meal---------------------drink a glass of wine (red)

on fg------------------------------chew some celery sticks or carrots

going to the doctors office---------------------chew on some beef jerky

while drinking alcohol----------------eat some pistachio nuts

to help ya get lung cancer

especially on fg!:yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl

In order of importance.

Coffee

Sex

Erm, thats about it.

Terrible habit too.





Sex that is. :wah:

Galbally;1143951 wrote: In order of importance.

Coffee

Sex

Erm, thats about it.

Terrible habit too.





Sex that is. :wah:


:yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl

Coffee

Sex

Talking on the phone

Chatting on FG

I have found that a cig & a coffee in the morning get your arse on the toilet quicker.

qsducks;1143953 wrote: :yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl

Coffee

Sex

Talking on the phone

Chatting on FG

I have found that a cig & a coffee in the morning get your arse on the toilet quicker.




You know, you are totally right about the toiletary effects of having a cigarette, it does get you going down there in the morning doesn't it?? Nicotene must be a diruetic.

Galbally;1143959 wrote: You know, you are totally right about the toiletary effects of having a cigarette, it does get you going down there in the morning doesn't it?? Nicotene must be a diruetic.


:yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl At least it works and you don't have to take any of those fiber drinks:wah:

Galbally;1143951 wrote: In order of importance.

Coffee

Sex

Erm, thats about it.

Terrible habit too.





Sex that is. :wah: Sex with yourself doesn't count :sneaky::sneaky:

oscar;1143977 wrote: Sex with yourself doesn't count :sneaky::sneaky:


It would count because you're only using one hand:sneaky:

qsducks;1143953 wrote: :yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl

Coffee

Sex

Talking on the phone

Chatting on FG

I have found that a cig & a coffee in the morning get your arse on the toilet quicker.


oh yes, coffee will do that!:yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl

Odie;1144011 wrote: oh yes, coffee will do that!:yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl


Yes, both get the system "going":yh_rotfl

qsducks;1144012 wrote: Yes, both get the system "going":yh_rotfl


wanna come over tomorrow for coffee and a smoke?:yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl



I have lots of room deodorizers.:yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl

Odie;1144033 wrote: wanna come over tomorrow for coffee and a smoke?:yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl



I have lots of room deodorizers.:yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl


Sure but I can also bring some Yankee candles too.:wah: Hey, what kind of seeds did you use for that giant sunflower?

qsducks;1144034 wrote: Sure but I can also bring some Yankee candles too.:wah: Hey, what kind of seeds did you use for that giant sunflower?


mmmmmmmmmmm love those candles!

they are just JUMBO sunflower seeds, bought them at my nursery.....but when I planted the four packages...most of the birds ate them..... should have put my chicken wire over top until they grew.:-5:-5:-5

Odie;1144037 wrote: mmmmmmmmmmm love those candles!

they are just JUMBO sunflower seeds, bought them at my nursery.....but when I planted the four packages...most of the birds ate them..... should have put my chicken wire over top until they grew.:-5:-5:-5


I have a problem with squirrels so we start the seeds indoors in mid April so then I just transplant them. I also do that with my morning glories & moonflowers. I have two iron poles holding up my front porch ceiling and I plant them there and they wrap around the poles. I'll have to take a piccy in the summer and post it.

oscar;1143977 wrote: Sex with yourself doesn't count :sneaky::sneaky:


Strangely enough, being perfectly frank, your absolutely right you know, masturbation doesn't actually induce the desire for a cigarette the way sex with another person. (happily I get to know the difference quite often ). Interesting though, isn't it?

qsducks;1143985 wrote: It would count because you're only using one hand:sneaky:


Having a cigarette while masturbating? I can safely say, that the thought of doing that has never even occurred to me before, thanks for putting that in my head. :rolleyes:

Galbally;1144051 wrote: Having a cigarette while masturbating? I can safely say, that the thought of doing that has never even occurred to me before, thanks for putting that in my head. :rolleyes:


It might be harder to concentrate but I'm sure you can manage it.:yh_rotfl

Odie;1143577 wrote: since this subject has come up, what are some things you need to have one for?







talking on the phone



after a meal



on fg



going to the doctors office



while drinking alcohol


After reading spocks posts I immediately take a Xanax followed by deep compulsive drags on a cig.

qsducks;1144041 wrote: I have a problem with squirrels so we start the seeds indoors in mid April so then I just transplant them. I also do that with my morning glories & moonflowers. I have two iron poles holding up my front porch ceiling and I plant them there and they wrap around the poles. I'll have to take a piccy in the summer and post it.


oooooooooooooo yes, take some pics for me!

I can't start anyfing indoors.........4 cats!:-5:-5

Galbally;1144049 wrote: Strangely enough, being perfectly frank, your absolutely right you know, masturbation doesn't actually induce the desire for a cigarette the way sex with another person. (happily I get to know the difference quite often ). Interesting though, isn't it? I never smoke after sex although i have been known to glow a little.

qsducks;1143985 wrote: It would count because you're only using one hand:sneaky:


I use two hands.:wah:

Nomad;1144132 wrote: After reading spocks posts I immediately take a Xanax followed by deep compulsive drags on a cig. I read Spot's post and had all my 60 a day in one go.

Lon;1144153 wrote: I use two hands.:wah: Sometimes i've smoked during sex as it was slightly more satisfying than the object i was with. It's why men have that dip in their backs...... god put it there for women to rest their ashtray on.

Galbally;1144049 wrote: Strangely enough, being perfectly frank, your absolutely right you know, masturbation doesn't actually induce the desire for a cigarette the way sex with another person. (happily I get to know the difference quite often ). Interesting though, isn't it? Do you feel a prick when your doing it?

oscar;1144156 wrote: I read Spot's post and had all my 60 a day in one go.


Have you also developed an uncontrollable nervous tick ?

oscar;1144156 wrote: I read Spot's post and had all my 60 a day in one go.


:yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl

oscar;1144152 wrote: I never smoke after sex although i have been known to glow a little.


Yes, women do that, I've noticed that myself, not you personally of course.

Lon;1144153 wrote: I use two hands.:wah:


Wow, I am jealous. Two hands?

You must be "well armed". Arf arf. :yh_rotfl

oscar;1144169 wrote: Do you feel a prick when your doing it?


Oh how droll.

You really should have considered a career in comedy you know.

Well either that, or perhaps sex therapy. :rolleyes:

Galbally;1144194 wrote: Wow, I am jealous. Two hands?



You must be "well armed". Arf arf. :yh_rotfl




Do we really want to encourage Lons masturbatory feats ?

Nomad;1144201 wrote: Do we really want to encourage Lons masturbatory feats ?


Yeah, why not, hey nomie, we're in a depression, loving yourself is free! :wah:

I'm not doing any measurements though, man to man, that just ain't never right, no time, no place. :yh_rotfl

Galbally;1144209 wrote: Yeah, why not, hey nomie, we're in a depression, loving yourself is free! :wah:



I'm not doing any measurements though, man to man, that just ain't never right, no time, no place. :yh_rotfl




Lon flys all over the world drinking pina coladas and eating mahi mahi on the beach at sunset. There is no depression in Lon world.

He plays tennis for Gods sake.

He just wants to talk about his penis.

Galbally;1144209 wrote: Yeah, why not, hey nomie, we're in a depression, loving yourself is free! :wah:

I'm not doing any measurements though, man to man, that just ain't never right, no time, no place. :yh_rotfl That and the fact that you can't buy tape measures under centimetres.

Galbally;1144194 wrote: Wow, I am jealous. Two hands?

You must be "well armed". Arf arf. :yh_rotfl Or well hard :sneaky:

Nomad;1144223 wrote: Lon flys all over the world drinking pina coladas and eating mahi mahi on the beach at sunset. There is no depression in Lon world.

He plays tennis for Gods sake.

He just wants to talk about his penis.


:yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl

oscar;1144227 wrote: That and the fact that you can't buy tape measures under centimetres.


You need to discuss that with Lon, not me. I come from good Celtic stock Ms O.

Nomad;1144223 wrote: Lon flys all over the world drinking pina coladas and eating mahi mahi on the beach at sunset. There is no depression in Lon world.

He plays tennis for Gods sake.

He just wants to talk about his penis.


Well let him off then, everyone needs something to talk about.

Tennis eh? He obviously didn't have his pension fund in Bernie Madoff's racket, thank god for him. I am glad someone is having a good time. Though just how good, maybe we don't need to know that much.

oscar;1144230 wrote: Or well hard :sneaky:


Should that not be "well ard"! :wah:

Galbally;1144278 wrote: You need to discuss that with Lon, not me. I come from good Celtic stock Ms O. I'll never be able to find out as i've pledged myself to that old scroat gmc :yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl

Galbally;1144281 wrote: Should that not be "well ard"! :wah: No, he's the dog in 'Enders'. Could be 'well hung' i suppose :wah:

Galbally;1144194 wrote: Wow, I am jealous. Two hands?

You must be "well armed". Arf arf. :yh_rotfl


Sometimes ------------ no hands at all.

Nomad;1144223 wrote: Lon flys all over the world drinking pina coladas and eating mahi mahi on the beach at sunset. There is no depression in Lon world.

He plays tennis for Gods sake.

He just wants to talk about his penis.


PENIS?? I thought you were talking about cigarettes.

Galbally;1144280 wrote: Well let him off then, everyone needs something to talk about.

Tennis eh? He obviously didn't have his pension fund in Bernie Madoff's racket, thank god for him. I am glad someone is having a good time. Though just how good, maybe we don't need to know that much.


With my retirement assets down about 22% I may have to scale back a bit and consider crewing on a sailboat to get back to the U.S. I guess I can forget ever getting the money back that I loaned to Bernie Madoff.:wah:

:wah:



My, my, my.....................how THIS thread got derailed!

along-for-the-ride;1144324 wrote: :wah:



My, my, my.....................how THIS thread got derailed!




sure did!:sneaky:

Lon;1144312 wrote: Sometimes ------------ no hands at all.


Now you are just showing off Lon.

No hands?

Erm?



Hey, I know, lets not go here. :wah: