A warning to your teenagers content could be upsetting
Posted: Mon Aug 24, 2009 6:08 pm
As I've mentioned before I've been catching up with someone from my past.
Been thinking and reminicing and things I'd blocked out have been returning, fortunetly for me it's mostly the good stuff.
So anyway this is what I wanted to tell your children . No matter what happens in your home, or to you, don't go off the rails . Try to find an option, other than running away.
The pro's and con's of running away.
My story - I was being molested as a child, went on for about 8 years as a recall. In between I ran away. . Now, lets be honest here . The sense of danger (I'd always been told of ) was not in my mind because I'd seen what danger actually was and lived with it. Running away meant an enormous load off my shoulder and the sense of excilerating freedom was so overwhelming it made me cry with happiness . The bus I took was my escape vehicle and the bus driver knew exactly what I was doing .......He'd been driving me to school for years. He asked me questions and I chatted with him ......(but I knew all men had an agenda at that age and was wary, nobody was going to stop me ) I was strong willed and was going to get out.
Danger huh? it's all relative I suppose. You see people like to take advantage of you .........sometimes even young people are in it for a bob . The person that helped me get out thought it best to hand me over to a prostitute and her pimp. He was payed for it in a way that struck me dumb, he had an agenda in helping me ( he was a friend of mine from a good family, he knew why I was running away WTF?) . He was to be the first. But there was an argument I overheard during my time at this house. Others knew the dollar value of a child prostitute and the little deal going on ....was off. I was too valuable to waste. Don't get me wrong they were all very kind to me the whole time I was there . but things were happening that were above my head. I wasn't a stupid child ...just a bit damaged ...but I had enough street/personal knowledge of what was going on .........Now I had to run away again. They watched me like a hawk, they took me places all the time . And I enjoyed myself. They offered me drugs but I didn't want or liked what they did to them ...I was taking everything in that was going on around me .......Discovered aliesha (the prostitute ) was a heroin addict. Her pimp (who I thought at first was just a boyfriend) was the first to begin grooming me. Then his cousin .......Alll very sweet and nice. then I was introduced to friends and associates ......Beginning to get scary? yep!!!
Then the bottom fell out of their plan......The police were looking for me. Questioning all my friends. Including the one who had offered me over ( he was the one who dropped the bomb shell on them ...I htink it was his pay back for not being able to touch me.
Suddenly the asset became a dangerous commodity....they had to get rid of me quickly. I was having such a good time I didn't realise how afraid they were. good time you ask? Well when your home life is not too good you become very good at blocking out the negatives. it was discussed that they would send me to Sydney because I'd fetch a good price up there. that's when *my friend* told me to get in his car. He was taking me home.
In my mind I was too scared to go home and Sydney sounded fun. yeah I know what you're thinking ....:-5...Hey I was fourteen!! And i didn't have to put up with 'HIM' anymore, one of the reasons I ran away was "HE' started offereing me to his friends. In my mind athe time I didn't realise I'd ended up in exactly the same position.
So anyway I go home the reception was anything but pleasant ...as I suspected. they kept ploughing me with questions but i couldn't tell them because "HE' was standing there. And the way my dad was acting it would have been too much for him ...murder would have been done. So I stayed silent and he had me back in his clentches . If I wsn't going to tell them now I never would ...He'd won.
I put up with the dirty looks given to me "as I was the bad child now, fallen from grace " But I sucked it up.
The next day I was taken to the police station. I let it all out . The inspector wanted to hit me I think. comments from him - " you need a good kick up the arse and a slap around the head .....my responce " What makes you think I don't already get that"
"We could take you down stairs and strip search you"
"Over my ****ing dead body"
" did they touch you ?"
" None of your ****ing business"
oh yes I came over very well.....delightful even :sneaky: but I was scared and that's how teenagers act when they are frightened . Those around me who were supposed to protect me...(in my mind ) had put me right back where I'd started. I was angry!!!
Years later i had my revenge though and so many people got hurt ...but it wsn't revenge really, it was a sickening feeling that it was happening to others and I'd said nothing and it was continuing. I had to protect them. And in all the drama I did .
So to cut a long story short, try to speak up, if something is happening at home .......Do it the right way . No matter how devastating it will be it will happen anyway at some point. And you don't need the guilt of silence or the guilt of it happening to someone else because you were silent .. And if some want to say you're lying and out of control anyway ..........Ask them why they think that might be.
Been thinking and reminicing and things I'd blocked out have been returning, fortunetly for me it's mostly the good stuff.
So anyway this is what I wanted to tell your children . No matter what happens in your home, or to you, don't go off the rails . Try to find an option, other than running away.
The pro's and con's of running away.
My story - I was being molested as a child, went on for about 8 years as a recall. In between I ran away. . Now, lets be honest here . The sense of danger (I'd always been told of ) was not in my mind because I'd seen what danger actually was and lived with it. Running away meant an enormous load off my shoulder and the sense of excilerating freedom was so overwhelming it made me cry with happiness . The bus I took was my escape vehicle and the bus driver knew exactly what I was doing .......He'd been driving me to school for years. He asked me questions and I chatted with him ......(but I knew all men had an agenda at that age and was wary, nobody was going to stop me ) I was strong willed and was going to get out.
Danger huh? it's all relative I suppose. You see people like to take advantage of you .........sometimes even young people are in it for a bob . The person that helped me get out thought it best to hand me over to a prostitute and her pimp. He was payed for it in a way that struck me dumb, he had an agenda in helping me ( he was a friend of mine from a good family, he knew why I was running away WTF?) . He was to be the first. But there was an argument I overheard during my time at this house. Others knew the dollar value of a child prostitute and the little deal going on ....was off. I was too valuable to waste. Don't get me wrong they were all very kind to me the whole time I was there . but things were happening that were above my head. I wasn't a stupid child ...just a bit damaged ...but I had enough street/personal knowledge of what was going on .........Now I had to run away again. They watched me like a hawk, they took me places all the time . And I enjoyed myself. They offered me drugs but I didn't want or liked what they did to them ...I was taking everything in that was going on around me .......Discovered aliesha (the prostitute ) was a heroin addict. Her pimp (who I thought at first was just a boyfriend) was the first to begin grooming me. Then his cousin .......Alll very sweet and nice. then I was introduced to friends and associates ......Beginning to get scary? yep!!!
Then the bottom fell out of their plan......The police were looking for me. Questioning all my friends. Including the one who had offered me over ( he was the one who dropped the bomb shell on them ...I htink it was his pay back for not being able to touch me.
Suddenly the asset became a dangerous commodity....they had to get rid of me quickly. I was having such a good time I didn't realise how afraid they were. good time you ask? Well when your home life is not too good you become very good at blocking out the negatives. it was discussed that they would send me to Sydney because I'd fetch a good price up there. that's when *my friend* told me to get in his car. He was taking me home.
In my mind I was too scared to go home and Sydney sounded fun. yeah I know what you're thinking ....:-5...Hey I was fourteen!! And i didn't have to put up with 'HIM' anymore, one of the reasons I ran away was "HE' started offereing me to his friends. In my mind athe time I didn't realise I'd ended up in exactly the same position.
So anyway I go home the reception was anything but pleasant ...as I suspected. they kept ploughing me with questions but i couldn't tell them because "HE' was standing there. And the way my dad was acting it would have been too much for him ...murder would have been done. So I stayed silent and he had me back in his clentches . If I wsn't going to tell them now I never would ...He'd won.
I put up with the dirty looks given to me "as I was the bad child now, fallen from grace " But I sucked it up.
The next day I was taken to the police station. I let it all out . The inspector wanted to hit me I think. comments from him - " you need a good kick up the arse and a slap around the head .....my responce " What makes you think I don't already get that"
"We could take you down stairs and strip search you"
"Over my ****ing dead body"
" did they touch you ?"
" None of your ****ing business"
oh yes I came over very well.....delightful even :sneaky: but I was scared and that's how teenagers act when they are frightened . Those around me who were supposed to protect me...(in my mind ) had put me right back where I'd started. I was angry!!!
Years later i had my revenge though and so many people got hurt ...but it wsn't revenge really, it was a sickening feeling that it was happening to others and I'd said nothing and it was continuing. I had to protect them. And in all the drama I did .
So to cut a long story short, try to speak up, if something is happening at home .......Do it the right way . No matter how devastating it will be it will happen anyway at some point. And you don't need the guilt of silence or the guilt of it happening to someone else because you were silent .. And if some want to say you're lying and out of control anyway ..........Ask them why they think that might be.
