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Shoulda, Coulda, Woulda

Posted: Mon Aug 09, 2010 8:02 am
by Lon
I have observed recently that there seems to be many people that live their lives not as what has, is, or will happen, but should have, could have or would have happened.

We can't change what has already happened and there are things that are presently happening and that will occur in the future that we absolutely have no control over and cannot change. Do you accept that or spend a disproportionate amount of time worrying about it? :-3

Shoulda, Coulda, Woulda

Posted: Mon Aug 09, 2010 8:18 am
by Rapunzel
Yes, I think most people worry way too much about things they cannot change and even knowing they cannot change them, they still can't help but worry about them.

However, I think people who worry about things tend to be nicer people on the whole. They are aware of what is going on around them and they try to make things better, for themselves and others, even if it's only in little ways.

There are other people who stick their heads in the sand and refuse to acknowledge when things are going wrong and who refuse to listen to you if you try to help them. There are others who arrogantly think they are above worrying about things, usually because they have enough money or fame to buy themselves out of any situation that they may get caught up in. You only have to look at Paris Hilton or Lindsay Lohan to see how long they spent behind bars for their driving offences. Do you think we would be similarly let off lightly because of 'prison overcrowding'? I doubt it.

I think, in general, it is part of the human condition to worry about things. Different worries for different people, but still worries. And because of our worries we try to make things better for our loved ones, our children, our future and in aiming to improve things for our loved ones we can also improve them for other people. Just my opinion.

Shoulda, Coulda, Woulda

Posted: Mon Aug 09, 2010 8:18 am
by Oscar Namechange
Lon;1326536 wrote: I have observed recently that there seems to be many people that live their lives not as what has, is, or will happen, but should have, could have or would have happened.

We can't change what has already happened and there are things that are presently happening and that will occur in the future that we absolutely have no control over and cannot change. Do you accept that or spend a disproportionate amount of time worrying about it? :-3 I totally agree with you Bonnie Lonnie.

When I look back over my life, I would not have had It any other way except for my ex husband... I should have stabbed him when I had the chance yet saying that, my marraige to him gave me a great Insight Into domestic violence that was a learning curve and enabled me In a small way to help other women.

I have to thank my Father who always encouraged us to follow our dreams how-ever daft they may have seen at the time and supported us through-out. He used to say that we should never be sitting In an old folks home one day wishing we had done this or that.

I also believe that some people get to a certain age and think that It is their lot In life and give up looking for new challenges. I have recently taken a course In photography In the hope that I may be a passable Race-horse Photography. I know I am never going to be an expert but I will have a damn good try. I am also very active In my community waiting for the next election.

We all have to have goals In life how-ever old we get or we become stagnant.

Shoulda, Coulda, Woulda

Posted: Mon Aug 09, 2010 8:59 am
by Lon
Rapunzel;1326540 wrote: Yes, I think most people worry way too much about things they cannot change and even knowing they cannot change them, they still can't help but worry about them.

However, I think people who worry about things tend to be nicer people on the whole. They are aware of what is going on around them and they try to make things better, for themselves and others, even if it's only in little ways.

There are other people who stick their heads in the sand and refuse to acknowledge when things are going wrong and who refuse to listen to you if you try to help them. There are others who arrogantly think they are above worrying about things, usually because they have enough money or fame to buy themselves out of any situation that they may get caught up in. You only have to look at Paris Hilton or Lindsay Lohan to see how long they spent behind bars for their driving offences. Do you think we would be similarly let off lightly because of 'prison overcrowding'? I doubt it.

I think, in general, it is part of the human condition to worry about things. Different worries for different people, but still worries. And because of our worries we try to make things better for our loved ones, our children, our future and in aiming to improve things for our loved ones we can also improve them for other people. Just my opinion.


I appreciate your input--------------There is a distinction between worry and concern. Concern is awareness of what is going on and can be productive. Constant worry is time consuming, debilitating and counter productive. Just my opinion.

Shoulda, Coulda, Woulda

Posted: Mon Aug 09, 2010 9:03 am
by Oscar Namechange
Lon;1326544 wrote: I appreciate your input--------------There is a distinction between worry and concern. Concern is awareness of what is going on and can be productive. Constant worry is time consuming, debilitating and counter productive. Just my opinion.
I am so worried right now... You did not answer my post.

Shoulda, Coulda, Woulda

Posted: Mon Aug 09, 2010 9:07 am
by Oscar Namechange
Rapunzel;1326540 wrote:



I think, in general, it is part of the human condition to worry about things. Different worries for different people, but still worries. And because of our worries we try to make things better for our loved ones, our children, our future and in aiming to improve things for our loved ones we can also improve them for other people. Just my opinion.
I can Identify with this paragraph... I have absolutely no time for those who sit In-front of their TV's complaining about the Government and do nothing about It.

I do not want to leave a country of Anti-Social-behaviour and cruelty to animals and Is why I make those my priorities for our children and Grand-children.------

Shoulda, Coulda, Woulda

Posted: Mon Aug 09, 2010 9:12 am
by Lon
oscar;1326546 wrote: I am so worried right now... You did not answer my post.


Oh my!! I am so sorry. How thoughtless of me. Oh, what to do. Can you ever forgive me? That's really not like me at all. I should be more thoughtful.

I don't know what's wrong with me. It will not happen again. Oh oh oh

:-1

Shoulda, Coulda, Woulda

Posted: Mon Aug 09, 2010 9:12 am
by CARLA
My Dad said to me one day "Worrying doesn't change a thing" I was in my early 20's at the time so I didn't get it then. Now that I'm in my 60's I understand exactly what he was saying. As I look back at what I worried about over the years that in the long run only slowed me down and hindered me from making a correct decision and moving on. Life is to short to worry about things you can't change or control let it go. :)

Shoulda, Coulda, Woulda

Posted: Mon Aug 09, 2010 9:16 am
by Oscar Namechange
CARLA;1326555 wrote: My Dad said to me one day "Worrying doesn't change a thing" I was in my early 20's at the time so I didn't get it then. Now that I'm in my 60's I understand exactly what he was saying. As I look back at what I worried about over the years that in the long run only slowed me down and hindered me from making a correct decision and moving on. Life is to short to worry about things you can't change or control let it go. :) Good point Carla. Even the mistakes In life can be seen as a learning curve and we are richer for that experience.

My Mother also spoke of the new challenges In life because as she pointed out... One day, you turn round and your husbands gone because you are boring as hell.

No -one could ever accuse my life of being boring.

Shoulda, Coulda, Woulda

Posted: Mon Aug 09, 2010 9:17 am
by Oscar Namechange
Lon;1326554 wrote: Oh my!! I am so sorry. How thoughtless of me. Oh, what to do. Can you ever forgive me? That's really not like me at all. I should be more thoughtful.

I don't know what's wrong with me. It will not happen again. Oh oh oh

:-1
Consider your-self reprimanded Lonnie and make sure you do not do it again. I am watching you !!!

Shoulda, Coulda, Woulda

Posted: Mon Aug 09, 2010 12:15 pm
by Peg
Lon;1326536 wrote: I have observed recently that there seems to be many people that live their lives not as what has, is, or will happen, but should have, could have or would have happened.

We can't change what has already happened and there are things that are presently happening and that will occur in the future that we absolutely have no control over and cannot change. Do you accept that or spend a disproportionate amount of time worrying about it? :-3


I used to worry about anything and everything. Now I don't worry about much. Worrying doesn't change a thing.

Shoulda, Coulda, Woulda

Posted: Mon Aug 09, 2010 12:58 pm
by Rapunzel
Lon;1326544 wrote: I appreciate your input--------------There is a distinction between worry and concern. Concern is awareness of what is going on and can be productive. Constant worry is time consuming, debilitating and counter productive. Just my opinion.


I agree there is a distinction between worry and concern.

I also think that worry can sometimes be time consuming, debilitating and counter productive.

However what I was defining was not concern, a vague wishy-washy generalised type of feeling, I was defining worry which can keep you on edge, keep you aware, it can even keep the adrenaline flowing should your senses feel you need it and depending on your type of worry.

Perhaps your financial circumstances have cushioned you so well that you no longer feel any need to worry and so see no point in it, maybe you only need to feel mild concern.

Shoulda, Coulda, Woulda

Posted: Mon Aug 09, 2010 2:12 pm
by Bryn Mawr
Lon;1326536 wrote: I have observed recently that there seems to be many people that live their lives not as what has, is, or will happen, but should have, could have or would have happened.

We can't change what has already happened and there are things that are presently happening and that will occur in the future that we absolutely have no control over and cannot change. Do you accept that or spend a disproportionate amount of time worrying about it? :-3


No.

What's past is gone. What will be, will be. What is, is.

Shoulda, Coulda, Woulda

Posted: Mon Aug 09, 2010 2:22 pm
by along-for-the-ride
And now the end is near

And so I face the final curtain

My friend I'll say it clear

I'll state my case of which I'm certain

I've lived a life that's full

I traveled each and every highway

And more, much more than this

I did it my way

Regrets I've had a few

But then again too few to mention

I did what I had to do

And saw it through without exemption

I planned each charted course

Each careful step along the byway

And more, much more than this

I did it my way

Yes there were times I'm sure you knew

When I bit off more than I could chew

But through it all when there was doubt

I ate it up and spit it out, I faced it all

And I stood tall and did it my way

I've loved, I've laughed and cried

I've had my fill, my share of losing

And now as tears subside

I find it all so amusing

To think I did all that

And may I say not in a shy way

Oh no, oh no, not me

I did it my way

For what is a man what has he got

If not himself then he has not

To say the things he truly feels

And not the words of one who kneels

The record shows I took the blows

And did it my way

Yes it was my way

:guitarist

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