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I'm often bemused by the junk mail I receive.

Whether it be penile dysfunction, 1/2 price maxi dresses from Matalan or cheap medication, always from Canada. If only they new me, they'd know I have no use for either. When will they learn to offer me something I want ? Offer me a device for blocking Big Brother from my TV or a clever kitchen gadget to stop my cheese on toast from burning under the grill or maybe a mute button for that silly cow down the road who giggles like a drain when she leaves the local pub at midnight. I don't want to accept an invitation from Svetlana to be my ******** buddy on MSN or facebook

I just want an occasional piece of junk mail that I would at least consider. Like a REAL, genuine $50,000,000 cheque from a Nigerian businesman.

Once. Just bloody once

Snowfire;1332543 wrote: or maybe a mute button for that silly cow down the road who giggles like a drain when she leaves the local pub at midnight.


OMG we're neighbours!

I live down the road from that silly cow too! :yh_rotfl

that's why its called junk mail.

Rapunzel;1332549 wrote: OMG we're neighbours!

I live down the road from that silly cow too! :yh_rotfl




I may live just up the road from both of you...

Because I have donated to some animal charities, these orgs sell on your details and I get the lot. I am afraid I have to just bin them because I know the Images would break my heart and before long I would be tempted to transfer the contents of my account to abused Llama's In Tibet or slightly put out McCaws In the jungle.

When I buy a womans magazine, half the rain Forest falls out with every-thing from mobile phones to frilly pants.

oscar;1332573 wrote:

When I buy a womans magazine, half the rain Forest falls out with every-thing from mobile phones to frilly pants.


I could use some frilly pants. :wah:

Rapunzel;1332580 wrote: I could use some frilly pants. :wah:


:yh_rotfl

and I get stuck with free tampons in the mail!:yh_rotfl

Odie;1332557 wrote: that's why its called junk mail.


Ah That'll be it then. Of course ! Shoulda fugured that out meself

Snowfire;1332543 wrote: I'm often bemused by the junk mail I receive.

Whether it be penile dysfunction, 1/2 price maxi dresses from Matalan or cheap medication, always from Canada. If only they new me, they'd know I have no use for either. When will they learn to offer me something I want ? Offer me a device for blocking Big Brother from my TV or a clever kitchen gadget to stop my cheese on toast from burning under the grill or maybe a mute button for that silly cow down the road who giggles like a drain when she leaves the local pub at midnight. I don't want to accept an invitation from Svetlana to be my ******** buddy on MSN or facebook

I just want an occasional piece of junk mail that I would at least consider. Like a REAL, genuine $50,000,000 cheque from a Nigerian businesman.

Once. Just bloody once


Okay, Snowfire, so I'll give up :-5

I thought you might have fallen for that beautifully knitted maxi dress, a giveaway at £499.99, or the "instant relief from cauliflower ear" pill for just under $200, but, sobeit, you didn't. And, by the way, I wasn't Svetlana.

Back to the drawing board...

theia;1332655 wrote: Okay, Snowfire, so I'll give up :-5

I thought you might have fallen for that beautifully knitted maxi dress, a giveaway at £499.99, or the "instant relief from cauliflower ear" pill for just under $200, but, sobeit, you didn't. And, by the way, I wasn't Svetlana.

Back to the drawing board...


Damn theres always a chance missed in life and there it goes. I got caught looking the other way

I did consider the maxi dress but I'm not sure they had the right size for my child bearing hips, or indeed my colour. I have a palid complexion for which some shades and hues just will not do

Have you seen the size of those ear pills ? A Nato issue 7.62mm rifle bullet, forced into what ear I have left, would have been a more comfortable option

flopstock;1332570 wrote: I may live just up the road from both of you...


So you're the drunken wench who comes caroling from yonder tavern in the wee small hours?

I'll be taking the po from under the bed and tossing it outta the window and over ya head the next time ya start ya caterwalling in my street missus. :p:wah: