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Presumably there are as many psycho Canadians but we have different delusions.

Here's the story:

Dude is in Canada (legally, illegally, we don't know) his neighbour down the hall ends up with his parcel delivery notice and comes in to pick it up, fails the ID check with bewilderment, we notice the unit number is 208 instead of 203. We mail out 2nd notices but he said he'd also drop off the delivery card at the correct door as well.

Later that day:

Dude calls in completely irate that he got a delivery card while he was home all day and no one knocks. I refer him to the 1 800 number if he's just calling to complain. He says he can find that number himself, he just wants to know if we have the parcel. I tell him we do and recognise the name so I inform him that his neighbour had kindly left the notice after finding out it didn't belong to him. Dude starts freaking out about how he's American and in America he'd be punished for misdelivering a notice. I offer him the 1 800 number. He again tells me he will deal with that himself. I inform him that his parcel would not have been returned without further notices. He tells me that in America they would redeliver it and he wants that to happen. I inform him that, while he may be able to arrange it via the 1 800 number, it will be far faster for him to just come pick it up. He tells me that in America this would never have happened. I tell him that I'm not actually connected directly to the parcel deliverers so I thankfully don't have to feel bad about it.

We disconnect.

Later that night:

Dude shows up with his notice card and ID that only has his name and not the correct address. He apologises for yelling on the phone so I decide to give him the package.

Once he has the package in hand he proceeds to tell me that he's already contacted his sister who sent the package and they will be filing a claim over the incident. Because in America the postal service is run by the feds. I inform him that we are also federal and that, as a result, the correct person is now in possession of the parcel. I make the mistake of asking him what he is going to claim since the parcel was not lost or returned incorrectly. He indicates that he suspects the neighbour of trying to steal his mail. Shows me a picture of the neighbour on his cell phone: Is this the man who tried to pick up my package? It was. So apparently he feels the federal postal service of the United States will be interested in criminal charges against a neighbour who does not have his mail and took the time to drop off his parcel delivery card personally. The Americans are apparently interested in a suspected criminal who failed to do anything bad in a country outside of their jurisdiction. Perhaps the neighbour being so thoughtfully stalked will not be allowed over the border any more after a month or so or (damn right) will get arrested at the border if he tries to cross ever again.

Like I said: Psycho American



In a peekaboo voice... Who's got yer mail? Who's got it?? You do! I see you. I see you with your mail. Good boy. Now get the hell out of here.

I'm not surprised in the least. I think you just ran into a out and out jerk Koan.

You should write a daily column about nothing in particular.

I'm trying to work out whether Dude is essentially unhappy, or whether he really enjoys getting up the noses of people he encounters. In which case he might be having a great time. I find it hard to get into his mind-set, never having been deliberately rude or obnoxious to anyone in my life.

When I am in another country, I tend to avoid volunteering to the people I meet how things are done in America.

The saga continued.

Turns out I was right about two things: Dude is here illegally and has been for 6 years. Dude is actively harassing the guy who's picture he had on his cell phone.

The connections between Dude and his victim are thus: Dude's girlfriend and victim's girlfriend are sisters. They all got along, though victim and girl thought Dude was a little nuts and that the sister could do better. They had a falling out and Dude is now harassing them and going ballistic because he's worried he's going to get deported. His apparent solution is to make matters worse for himself.

The saga continuation is that Dude chose to tell victim (who is not the guy who came to pick up the package) that the post office now has victim and victim's girlfriend's photos, names and addresses posted as suspected felons and that we are on notice to not release any parcels to them. Dude claimed I had positively identified victim as the perpetrator and he would be pressing charges against them. Dude failed to realise that me saying "yeah, that looks like him" to a cell phone snap shot of a guy who does look like his neighbour negated that I told him the unit number of the person and that unit number is not the one his victim lives in. They both happen to look Puerto Rican.

I took great pleasure in writing out for the victim's girlfriend how events transpired and that Dude had been informed of the unit number but chose to ignore it in favour of his preferred theory. I also recorded that he seemed unable to comprehend that no one except him had possession of his mail... hence no crime was committed. Signed, dated and post office stamped. I expect I'll see him again demanding that I affirm who I identified.

I'm sorry to inform the Americans here that Dude intends on returning to the US some day and joining Homeland Security... to which he has already applied... probably using his sister's address in Texas.

koan;1354881 wrote: The saga continued.

Turns out I was right about two things: Dude is here illegally and has been for 6 years. Dude is actively harassing the guy who's picture he had on his cell phone.

The connections between Dude and his victim are thus: Dude's girlfriend and victim's girlfriend are sisters. They all got along, though victim and girl thought Dude was a little nuts and that the sister could do better. They had a falling out and Dude is now harassing them and going ballistic because he's worried he's going to get deported. His apparent solution is to make matters worse for himself.

The saga continuation is that Dude chose to tell victim (who is not the guy who came to pick up the package) that the post office now has victim and victim's girlfriend's photos, names and addresses posted as suspected felons and that we are on notice to not release any parcels to them. Dude claimed I had positively identified victim as the perpetrator and he would be pressing charges against them. Dude failed to realise that me saying "yeah, that looks like him" to a cell phone snap shot of a guy who does look like his neighbour negated that I told him the unit number of the person and that unit number is not the one his victim lives in. They both happen to look Puerto Rican.

I took great pleasure in writing out for the victim's girlfriend how events transpired and that Dude had been informed of the unit number but chose to ignore it in favour of his preferred theory. I also recorded that he seemed unable to comprehend that no one except him had possession of his mail... hence no crime was committed. Signed, dated and post office stamped. I expect I'll see him again demanding that I affirm who I identified.

I'm sorry to inform the Americans here that Dude intends on returning to the US some day and joining Homeland Security... to which he has already applied... probably using his sister's address in Texas.


Hopefully, being in Canada illegally for 6 years disqualifies him for HS job.

If not, just another reason I have to avoid DFW.

LarsMac;1354885 wrote: Hopefully, being in Canada illegally for 6 years disqualifies him for HS job.

If not, just another reason I have to avoid DFW.


I'm pretty sure he won't have told them he's not in Texas anymore.

He's not too keen on the law unless it's to threaten other people with it.

Homeland Security would do security checks on all their employees, even the janitors, and I can attest that security checks are actually very thorough. There's no way they wouldn't notice a 6 year gap in employment/US residency.

As enjoyable as it might be to label all Americans as psycho thanks to one encounter with an obviously unhinged man, I think it's a safe bet that he's unique and would be psycho no matter his nationality.

There's pretty loose usage of words associated with "psycho" as applied to Americans. But I must admit, when I search around the internet where people are communicating, the majority of bombastic and easily offended individuals appear to be American.

Spot posted a very good explanation of "Psychosis" here. Using that as a reference, it's worth considering whether the behavior of Americans I'm talking of is related to stress.

You'll note that I allowed for there being as many psycho Canadians but that we seem to have different delusions.

This person in particular kept bringing the fact that he's American into the discussion as if it was relevant. So I'm granting that he's not just a psycho, he's an American psycho.

Unfortunately you used "Americans"... plural... in your title.

koan;1354836 wrote: Presumably there are as many psycho Canadians but we have different delusions.


Fortunately I also said there are Canadian psychos.



... But enough about me. :p

Ahso!;1354894 wrote: There's pretty loose usage of words associated with "psycho" as applied to Americans. But I must admit, when I search around the internet where people are communicating, the majority of bombastic and easily offended individuals appear to be American.

Spot posted a very good explanation of "Psychosis" here. Using that as a reference, it's worth considering whether the behavior of Americans I'm talking of is related to stress.


The guy made a point of being American, and he is obviously psycho.

In America, he'd be just another loony, and nobody would give him much thought.

But he is in Canada, and making a big deal about being American. And Canada sees a lot of loony-toon Americans.

Shoulda heard the stories I got while pubbing with the guys I was working with in Waterloo last November.

And true enough I have met my share of Loony Canadians, but they are mostly from Montreal.

That's a whole OTHER story.

LarsMac;1354926 wrote:

And true enough I have met my share of Loony Canadians, but they are mostly from Montreal.

That's a whole OTHER story.
lmao

I voted to let them separate.