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We were just informed that a 7th grader at the Middle School commited suicide..My daughter is devistaed....What can a child have so severly wrong that they would do this..Their family "seemed" normal - very nice parents, home - very happy girl normally...I can not imagine what could go so wrong..My daughter thinks her "boyfriend" broke up with her?? 13 - and your serious about a relationship? Oh how sad...My daughter needs some serious words of wisdom and I am turning to my friends and internet friends to help me..Any ideas on how to approach this?

One of my first calls as a medic student was a 13 year old boy who ate a shotgun. It almost caused me to take a career turn. I was only 20 at the time and couldn't for the life of me, figure out what would make him want to do this.

As for your daughter, I don't have any advice from personal experience, other than when I was 13. She probably doesn't really know what "love" is, but has an idea based on what she's seen (TV, real life). It all seems very serious to her now. After time, she'll feel better. It's getting thru the 'time' part thats hard.

There's got to be more to it than just breaking up with a 13 year old boyfriend. Breaking up can be difficult, but if she seemed to have it all as well, there's probably a lot more than we think. She was probably depressed before the incident and people either ignored or didn't catch the warning signs. It is really sad. The signs of depression really need to be beaten everybody's heads.

We had a long talk..I stressed to her that nothing in this world can be so bad that you can not find help somewhere..She wasn't best friends with her but knew her well enough. I told her we can not judge her or her family - we did not live between her walls and we did not know her whole situation. We talked a little about depression and how it changes people..they truely are not themselves when they are depressed. ..She seems to be better tonight. They are going to have people there at school to talk to the kids..I am hoping that something will sink in and that these kids can get support at home also...They had made a statement for everyone to watch their kids as sometimes this puts more emphasis on it..bringing it more to their eye - sometimes being a very bad thing for other kids who think they are at the end also...I wonder each day as the girls grow up what will they come home with next..sometimes its a word they say that floors me..or a friend who smokes at their age...It turns my stomach and I pray that my kids will use the morals I gave them...I was not an angel growing up, and had to quick with a child at 18 - but also- have learned a lot in the last 4 years - facing illness....Its just not fair when life takes a child - no matter how it happens...I just don't understand......

When I was in grade six a very popular grade seven girl committed suicide because her parents grounded her and she wasn't able to go to the school dance. It was very shocking. She was a beautiful, popular girl who seemed to have everything going for her. She may not have intended on dying as she took a bunch of pills and might have thought they would pump her stomach before she died...we'll never know. Death is not something young kids, or adults, can come to terms with easily. Things seem so much more important to kids than we think they are and they so often feel misunderstood to the point that they feel hopeless. The best that can be done is to let them know that you care about their feelings and will make time to listen to their problems. Easier said than done.

Too often, adults say, "I wish that were my biggest problem". They forget what it was like to be a teen or a preteen. I've told my kids that they will have more broken hearts and none are ever easy, but they will get through it, look back and not understand why they were so upset. Teens tend to hide their real feelings a lot of time so you have to take the time to listen, not only to what they are saying, but to what they aren't saying, what they are saying to others, etc. How tragic for a parent to lose their child to suicide. A girl I knew was on the phone with her b/f in our freshman year, told him to hang on a minute, then shot herself. I often wonder now that it has been many years ago, how he dealt with it and if it still haunts him.

Very, very sad indeed. Sometimes 13 year olds just take things too seriously without being able to put them into context. I am so sorry for the family and friends.