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I've recently had this reverse cougar thing going on. I keep getting these young guys trying to pick me up. What's up with that? I'm 41 and my most recent suitor is 24!! The one before that was 32... which I could put up with. Before that was 20... ARGH! It's so hard to say no. lol I'm seriously not a cougar. I keep telling them how old I am! I think Demi went and made it a fad. Maybe now she and Ashton broke up the little boys will start being more realistic.

What do you think is appropriate age difference? I've set the bottom limit on them not being young enough that I could have given birth to them.

I never go for younger men but they have gone for me. It might be because I have sons and that adds a bit of "yuck" factor to it. To me it's just creepy. But what floats your boat.

I did read an article on the reverse side of gold digging which is a recent phenomina. Put down to the fact that there are more wealthy women now.

That's why my plans for the future involve always looking like I'm poor. lol

With you on the "yuck" factor. The guys hitting on me are younger than the guys my daughter is interested in. That sets a good guideline as well. I am a sucker for a guy with eyeliner and a painbrush though.

Okay I can picture the paintbrush ...but?

Well I'll be married off soon enough so I won't have to worry about these things ...and my fiancee is 14 years older than me. I think that makes me a hypocrit. Or does it at our age?

Hang I still have to worry ...what if one of my boys brings home an older woman ?????? Actually the eldest was seeing a 35 year old when he was 22....what in gods name could they have possibly had in common? Okay apart from sex .

yeah... I like a guy with eyeliner. hehe

Harder to find as they get older.

I can't speak for all men, but for me, when I was a young man, having an affair with an older woman (35-45) was all about sex. I like sensuous females and the older woman always seemed to have it over her younger sisters. They were also more receptive to my approach. At my age now those are mere memories.

I recall an old saying about sex with older women "They don't swell, they don't tell and they are grateful as hell".

Lon;1386788 wrote: I can't speak for all men, but for me, when I was a young man, having an affair with an older woman (35-45) was all about sex. I like sensuous females and the older woman always seemed to have it over her younger sisters. They were also more receptive to my approach. At my age now those are mere memories.

I recall an old saying about sex with older women "They don't swell, they don't tell and they are grateful as hell". OH WOW!!

I think its personal preference....and yes I've been with younger men--it was fun but thats all it was. I don't go after them, they persue me. I always thought it was sick actually, but now that I'm in my 40's and men my age are all either married or gay or so damaged they can't talk straight...why not have a fun fling with a younger man here and there? To each his/her own I say....

I talked to a younger guy at work today about the cub phenomenon... because that's what it is: I'm not pursuing them, they're courting me. He admitted to having a cub relationship at the age of 21 and thought it was a legitimate experience. The next convo was to do with "friends with benefits" arrangements, which is pretty much what cub/cougar relations are. I've always thought that my appeal is that I don't want them to "save" me or take care of me and am pretty much happy if they don't need me to give them a reason to justify their existence... because I'm busy doing ****.

On the other hand, I'm interested in finding someone who is also busy doing **** they thoroughly enjoy and who has an imagination that wonders whether or not acid came first.

Koan, how wonderful that young men wish to take you up the ginnel. But then, you do seem to have an attractiveness about you.

Decided the age isn't as important as the enthusiasm for life, not being high maintenance, and probably having creative ambitions where we help each other instead of competing. If those are true then short or long term doesn't matter as it won't be "wasted" time.