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I hope this is the right forum. I am a bit worried because I would like my money to go to my boy if anything happens to me or after I die The problem is that he has been adopted by my cousin because I was deemed too slow (long story) and I have been told that because he is no longer my child he wouldn't be able to inherit anything and It would go to my cousins.

This I don’t want as (don’t get me wrong) I am grateful for my elder cousin adopting my son when things got too tough for me, as I was put under a huge amount of strain my social services just because of my learning difficulty. But she doesn't like me to see him very often, or have anything to do with him and when I do get close her silly brother ruins it by interfering! And my son’s like a project to her anyway because she acts like the martyr holding him at arms length if you get what I mean.

Should I write a will stating that my money must be inherited by my son? Any UK solicitor users on this site advise me please? Thank you.

Your solicitor Is the best bet because then It's legal with no wrangling after your death.

You can get a Will Kit and do it yourself but It doesn't stop relatives contesting your wishes.

I'd like to do it properly so I hope it's not too expensive.

Your son has a claim on your estate that supersedes any your cousins might have. As an adopted son he also has a prior claim on your cousins estate that supersedes that of your other cousins. Get hold of a a solicitor to write your will and do it properly - doesn't cost that much and one way or another there will have to be one involved on your death not having a will actually costs a lot more since any will you write yourself still has to be accepted by the court as legal. There must have been one involved in your son's adoption - did you not have one acting on your behalf?

I wrote something out long ago for a solicitor, but she didn't make it easy for me due to her working for social services then for me. Would it matter if I went to another solicitors who could advise and help me?

Wouldn't the age of the son be a factor here?

If under age (minor) is to inherit the funds are in a trust account or a guardian is appointed and distributes the funds. If a guardian is appointed which would probably be the cousin - then the cousin would have access to spending the funds?

this is a question?

Patsy

Just as an observation Aura. If you have enough money that you are worried about that you want your son to inherit, then surely you have enough money to have a solicitor do it properly for you. Prudent not to be penny wise and pound foolish.

Aura;1436095 wrote: I wrote something out long ago for a solicitor, but she didn't make it easy for me due to her working for social services then for me. Would it matter if I went to another solicitors who could advise and help me? Get another solicitor Independent of any Involvement In any other matter. He can do a will for approx £150.

Legally, your son Is now your cousins legal son... that's providing the adoption was through the courts and an adoption certificate granted by the courts.

If your son was not legally adopted through the courts and was simply an Informal arrangement for you cousin to raise him, then he's still legally your son. Is there a legal adoption certificate from the courts?

Regardless, when you make a will through a solicitor, It Is legally binding and your wishes must be carried out upon your death. If your son Is legally adopted, you can still ensure he gets your estate by simply naming him In your will.

then the cousin would have access to spending the funds?


Like hell it's for my son only. Na I would like him to have it, not being rude about cousins but they haven't really done anything for me except put me down.

Just as an observation Aura. If you have enough money that you are worried about that you want your son to inherit, then surely you have enough money to have a solicitor do it properly for you.


I'm on benefits mate (I know sounds terrible) so if I choose one I would like to do it properly

Legally, your son Is now your cousins legal son... that's providing the adoption was through the courts and an adoption certificate granted by the courts.


I refused to sign the adoption papers so social services did it anyway, saying they didn't need my signature. If it comes to £150 then I will grit my teeth and pay the expense.

Aura

how old is your son?

I'm asking as if the age could make a different arrangement now?

Patsy

Patsy Warnick;1436106 wrote: Aura

how old is your son?

I'm asking as if the age could make a different arrangement now?

Patsy


Under UK law Patsy, his age makes no difference at all. If he's been legally adopted, she needs to name him In her will.

Aura, there are so many things that would completely change the outcome if you were to die without making a will. Just as simple a matter as whether you've ever married, for example, would change things. The other issue is who would apply to take your estate and distribute it - if you don't make a will then you have no say in who that will be. You really need to see a solicitor to have your intentions acted on. Phone around your local firms and get a fixed price quote for a simple will leaving everything to one person, and take the cheapest offer.

Oh, Aura needs to make a will

I believe I read - the son is not legally adopted.

None the less Aura should make a will.

Patsy

Patsy Warnick;1436106 wrote: Aura

how old is your son?

I'm asking as if the age could make a different arrangement now?

Patsy


Hi he's nine years old.

Here is an update. I have been told that funeral costs would be about three thousand pounds and that's more then I earn in a lifetime. So I don't have that much savings, so the money owed to my boy and my savings would be obliterated to cover that anyway. Is there an organisation that can help with funeral costs please?

Aura;1437861 wrote: Here is an update. I have been told that funeral costs would be about three thousand pounds and that's more then I earn in a lifetime. So I don't have that much savings, so the money owed to my boy and my savings would be obliterated to cover that anyway. Is there an organisation that can help with funeral costs please?


If your son Is adult ie over 17 when you die and Is solely responsible for the cost of your funeral, he can apply for a grant from the DSS providing he Is out of work or on a low Income.

The best way to put your mind at rest Is take out a funeral plan Insurance policy. It's up to you how much you want to take out depending on the pay out you want your son to have after your death but you can get them for a payout of around £4,000 for about £7 a month.

Aura

Are you trying to tell us your ill?

You stated your son was nine yrs. old and I'm sure he would not be held responsible for the cost of a funeral at this time.

You may not have a bundle of money to award your son but you have a bundle of love for him.

I hope all works out for you.

Patsy

oscar;1437864 wrote: If your son Is adult ie over 17 when you die and Is solely responsible for the cost of your funeral, he can apply for a grant from the DSS providing he Is out of work or on a low Income.

The best way to put your mind at rest Is take out a funeral plan Insurance policy. It's up to you how much you want to take out depending on the pay out you want your son to have after your death but you can get them for a payout of around £4,000 for about £7 a month.


Hi I am in my fourties will I be a bit old to do that? Also which organisation is best to take out a funeral plan Insurance policy? Many thanks.

Patsy Warnick;1437889 wrote: Aura

Are you trying to tell us your ill?

You stated your son was nine yrs. old and I'm sure he would not be held responsible for the cost of a funeral at this time.

You may not have a bundle of money to award your son but you have a bundle of love for him.

I hope all works out for you.

Patsy


Yeah I love him dearly that's why I would like him to be well looked after even through no one care's a tittie's about me. No one can see into the future (unless you have a gift like Mother Shipton or Nostradamus) but I would like to be prepared.

1. funeral plan

2. solicitor....state trustees , executor, see what can be put aside in a trust for him.

3, see to bank accounts that hold any savings.

No funeral company will be getting that amount of money from us. I intend to be put in a cardboard box. No hymns. No Prayers and certainly no polished wood and brass handles.

I would like it to be as basic as is possible.

A bit like this....



A Simple Funeral - Simply BASIC

Snowfire;1437896 wrote: No funeral company will be getting that amount of money from us. I intend to be put in a cardboard box. No hymns. No Prayers and certainly no polished wood and brass handles.

I would like it to be as basic as is possible.

A bit like this....



A Simple Funeral - Simply BASIC


Thanks for the link but will they adhure to my wishes, as I have no intention of being buried in a graveyard.

Aura;1437892 wrote: Hi I am in my fourties will I be a bit old to do that? Also which organisation is best to take out a funeral plan Insurance policy? Many thanks.


Not at all. You can get them even over 50 years old.

Funeral Plans | UK Funeral Planning Service from The Co-operative

Aura;1437861 wrote: Here is an update. I have been told that funeral costs would be about three thousand pounds and that's more then I earn in a lifetime. So I don't have that much savings, so the money owed to my boy and my savings would be obliterated to cover that anyway. Is there an organisation that can help with funeral costs please?


Aura, people are quite likely worrying you for no good reason in this thread. Don't go out wasting your money on a savings plan to cover the cost of your funeral. Don't end up thinking your boy is going to be forced to pay for it otherwise.

I hope you live a long and happy life but whenever it happens, if nobody volunteers to pay for your funeral, then there's a legal obligation on your local council to see that you get a proper funeral in a dignified fashion. You can die without a penny and you'll still be treated respectfully.

If you're buried at the council's expense then they'll be in the queue of people to be paid from whatever money you had left, that's all.

You can google:

"destitute funeral" england

if you want to see more details.

Sorry Aura but Tyr's post Is totally Inaccurate.

A council funeral known as a Paupers funeral can only apply where there are no Immediate family and no assets of the deceased.

In your case, If your son Is adult upon your death and a beneficary of your will, then he can be responsible for your funeral costs. In your case, as you have a home and furnature, the council would sell off anything you have to help pay for your funeral.

If the deceased left furniture or other personal effects arrangements will be made for the disposal of these items and any money recovered offset against the cost of the funeral.

If possible the cost of the funeral is met out of the estate of the deceased, or from a spouse or a parent. If details of family and friends are found they will be informed of the death and invited to make the funeral arrangements. If it is not possible to contact a spouse or a parent the cost will be met by the Council.



Death & Bereavement - West Somerset Council

Think about It... If It was that simple to get a free funeral paid for by the Council, everyone would be at It. You only get that If you have no assets ie furnature or Immediate family.

oscar;1437920 wrote: Sorry Aura but Tyr's post Is totally Inaccurate.

A council funeral known as a Paupers funeral can only apply where there are no Immediate family and no assets of the deceased.

In your case, If your son Is adult upon your death and a beneficary of your will, then he can be responsible for your funeral costs. In your case, as you have a home and furnature, the council would sell off anything you have to help pay for your funeral.

If the deceased left furniture or other personal effects arrangements will be made for the disposal of these items and any money recovered offset against the cost of the funeral.

If possible the cost of the funeral is met out of the estate of the deceased, or from a spouse or a parent. If details of family and friends are found they will be informed of the death and invited to make the funeral arrangements. If it is not possible to contact a spouse or a parent the cost will be met by the Council.



Death & Bereavement - West Somerset Council

Think about It... If It was that simple to get a free funeral paid for by the Council, everyone would be at It. You only get that If you have no assets ie furnature or Immediate family.


Just a click along on the site you quoted it explains about paupers funerals, how about you do your research and check things out before you claim someone else's post is totally inaccurate when most of yours actually are.

How about you also leave it up to Aura to decide if she wants to take other's advice instead of attempting to trash someone else's post in her thread.

The Local Authority is required under the Public Health (Control of Disease) Act 1984 to arrange for the disposal of the body if a person dies in the district and no arrangements are being made for the funeral. Requests for assistance can be made where no arrangements have been made, there is no will, or there are no relatives willing to pay and make the arrangements.

Death & Bereavement - West Somerset Council

Aura, this might be a way of getting your Will written by a professional solicitor. You can say who you want to inherit, and what you want to happen after your death.

A local solicitor writes your Will, then instead of paying their fee you are invited to make a donation to Will Aid

Will Aid



There's no obligation on you to pay anything though you might like to make a donation to a charity in exchange.

Betty Boop;1437943 wrote: Just a click along on the site you quoted it explains about paupers funerals, how about you do your research and check things out before you claim someone else's post is totally inaccurate when most of yours actually are.

How about you also leave it up to Aura to decide if she wants to take other's advice instead of attempting to trash someone else's post in her thread.

The Local Authority is required under the Public Health (Control of Disease) Act 1984 to arrange for the disposal of the body if a person dies in the district and no arrangements are being made for the funeral. Requests for assistance can be made where no arrangements have been made, there is no will, or there are no relatives willing to pay and make the arrangements.

Death & Bereavement - West Somerset Council


So Tyr comes Into the thread with :

"Aura, people are quite likely worrying you for no good reason in this thread"

but when I dispute what he's said, you come In on the defensive telling me to let Aura make her own mind up ??

She has written this thread asking for advice. I'm not suggesting for a minute that my advice Is better than anyone else's but I am concerned Aura will be led Into a false sense of security by Tyr's post.

You seem to be missing the point here Betty. Aura has clearly stated from the onset that she wishes her son to Inherit from her. If this Includes money and he wishes to arrange the funeral, he will have to repay the money to the council and It will not be free as Tyr stated.

You or your partner must get one of the following benefits.

• Income Support

• Income-based Jobseeker’s Allowance

• Income-related Employment and Support Allowance

• Pension Credit

• Working Tax Credit which includes a disability or severe disability element

• Child Tax Credit at a rate higher than the family element

• Housing Benefit

• Council Tax Benefit

If Aura's sone Is not In receipt of benefits upon her death, the council will not pay as Tyr has claimed.

If you get a Funeral Payment, you will have to pay this back from any estate of the person who died. Their estate includes money, property and other things that they owned. (Any home that is still lived in by a surviving partner or personal things left to relatives do not form part of the estate.)



If Aura has bequeathed money to her son, he will not get a free council funeral.

I just don't want her misled.

How to pay for a Funeral - Help & Advice

Thanks for your replies.

the council would sell off anything you have to help pay for your funeral.


That's what I am worried about and my money owed to my son wouldn't go to him . It would probably be offered to my greedy cousins, who probably wouldn't tell him I left him anything! Plus I would end up in a crummy graveyard and not where I want to be, which is along a seafront in Cornwall. :-1

Is the Co Op very good for funerals's?

Aura;1437959 wrote: Thanks for your replies.



That's what I am worried about and my money owed to my son wouldn't go to him . It would probably be offered to my greedy cousins, who probably wouldn't tell him I left him anything! Plus I would end up in a crummy graveyard and not where I want to be, which is along a seafront in Cornwall. :-1

Is the Co Op very good for funerals's? First of all Aura, the first person to be notified of your passing and the first person who would be offered to make arrangements for your funeral would be the person you deem as next of kin and you can name your son.

If you wish that none of your assets ie your furnature, Jewellry and personal effects go to cousins etc, then make a will naming your son as sole beneficiary. This will block anyone else from making a claim on anything.

Tyr Is correct that people can get a free council funeral If they are destitute but the qualifications possibly will not apply to your son once you die. If he Is In work and not on a low Income, he will be expected to pay especially If he has Inherited any sum of money or assets upon your death. He may be able to get a grant Initially but once your estate Is settled, If he's Inherited money from you, he will be expected to repay the grant. The Council would give you a free funeral but only on the condition that your son and all other family refused to handle the arrangements and I'm sure your son would not do this to you.

If your son has no money and Is out of work, then Yes, the council will arrange the funeral but will sell off any furnature etc to help pay the cost If that furnature Is not willed to anyone. So really, your son can't win. If you don't make him sole beneficiary then the council can take your furnature and belongings to pay for a funeral and If he does Inherit from you, he can be asked to pay for the costs.

My advice would be to make a simple will making your son sole beneficiary so your cousins can't help themselves and take out a simple funeral plan for approx £3,000 which will cover the basic cost which would see you paying approx £6 a month.

Unfortunately, my husband has been looking Into this subject recently. The Co-Op Is a very good funeral service and one of the more reliable and reasonably priced we have found.

oscar;1437960 wrote: First of all Aura, the first person to be notified of your passing and the first person who would be offered to make arrangements for your funeral would be the person you deem as next of kin and you can name your son.

If you wish that none of your assets ie your furnature, Jewellry and personal effects go to cousins etc, then make a will naming your son as sole beneficiary. This will block anyone else from making a claim on anything.

Tyr Is correct that people can get a free council funeral If they are destitute but the qualifications possibly will not apply to your son once you die. If he Is In work and not on a low Income, he will be expected to pay especially If he has Inherited any sum of money or assets upon your death. He may be able to get a grant Initially but once your estate Is settled, If he's Inherited money from you, he will be expected to repay the grant. The Council would give you a free funeral but only on the condition that your son and all other family refused to handle the arrangements and I'm sure your son would not do this to you.

If your son has no money and Is out of work, then Yes, the council will arrange the funeral but will sell off any furnature etc to help pay the cost If that furnature Is not willed to anyone. So really, your son can't win. If you don't make him sole beneficiary then the council can take your furnature and belongings to pay for a funeral and If he does Inherit from you, he can be asked to pay for the costs.

My advice would be to make a simple will making your son sole beneficiary so your cousins can't help themselves and take out a simple funeral plan for approx £3,000 which will cover the basic cost which would see you paying approx £6 a month.

Unfortunately, my husband has been looking Into this subject recently. The Co-Op Is a very good funeral service and one of the more reliable and reasonably priced we have found.


£6 a month isn't too bad, how do I get in touch with Co Op please? Sorry to ask. I would tell my mum but she would tell my aunt who in turn would tell my cousin who has my son. Because she has more money then me, she would probably start a plan to block my wishes.

Aura;1437961 wrote: £6 a month isn't too bad, how do I get in touch with Co Op please? Sorry to ask.


Ring this number and they will give you all the Info you need.

Funeral Plans | UK Funeral Planning Service from The Co-operative

Because of your circumstances and your son being adopted out, may I suggest "gifting" your son articles or funds. To my understanding people can contest wills but 'gifting' in a will is largely left alone. Ensuring your son acquires what you 'personally' request.

fuzzywuzzy;1438046 wrote: Because of your circumstances and your son being adopted out, may I suggest "gifting" your son articles or funds. To my understanding people can contest wills but 'gifting' in a will is largely left alone. Ensuring your son acquires what you 'personally' request.


That's a good Idea...

I was thinking about his last night and as Aura Is mid forties, If she Is In good health she can put off a funeral plan and wait until she can get one of the lower rate over 50's plan. By that time, her son will be adult and she can discuss with him as to what his wishes are on her passing. If as an adult he expresses the wish to arrange and pay for her funeral, then she can take appropriate action and cover him and herself. If she waits until he Is adult, It'll save her paying Into a fund for ten years while he's a child. If she names him as next of kin, he will be the first to be Informed and If she wills him her possessions, the council will not be able to take them from him. It's just when no-one and no relative Is willing to pay and arrange the funeral that the council will look to recover costs.

Aura... If you see this then I've done some research for you and found that you can get a funeral plan for as low as £5 a month.

http://www.co-operative.coop/funeralcar ... n=b_Shared

As one example.

There are alternative solutions such as a minimal low cost life Insurence policy which would not only see your funeral costs covered but also give a little extra In the way of cash for your son.

If you would like me to get you some exact quotes, then private message me and I can let you know what details I need.

Of course, at the end of the day, the decision Is up to you. Your peace of mind Is the most Important thing here and only you can decide what you can afford each month.