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I have finally accepted In life that I am suffering from a condition that affects thousands of people.

Cack Handedness.

cack-handed: definition of cack-handed in Oxford dictionary (British & World English)

I can complete a Rubik's cube In minutes, I can pluck my eyebrows with exact precision, I can even give a Sailor a run for his money In knot tying...but I can't open a packet of biscuits, a carton of juice or even a packet of crisps without splitting the pack and half the contents going on the floor. Either that, or I will lose my temper with It and slash the packet with scissors or the bread knife.

For years, I have suffered withering looks first from my parents and now my husband. Well from now on I want sympathy and I may just form a Cack handed society for people like me where lessons could be given to deal with cling film as one example.

If you too are suffering from Cack handedness, please sign here.

Thats not cack handedness that's modern packaging.

Bruv;1456071 wrote: Thats not cack handedness that's modern packaging. That's my excuse but not according to my husband who can open a packet of biscuits first time without spilling a crumb.

Then there's now those packets of cheese that are supposed to be resealable. Not After I've opened them. You are supposed to cut along the dotted line.... yeah right !! I do that and It still won't open.

Cling Film dispensers... what cruel bugger Invented those for a laugh ?

Oh and Jacobs Cream Crackers... now they have a tear tab half way down the pack. Oh right... I pull the tab, the pack splits open and the dogs get the broken crackers on the floor.

Oh and while we're here... Milk plastic bottles. Right, I can get the cap off and then there's a little tab I am supposed to pull to take the seal off... no... I have to get a large pointy knife and stab It.

Don't even get me started on Corned Beef tins and ring pulls.

Cigg packs.... There's meant to be a tiny transparent tab that you pull to unwrap the cellophane but no, I'm sitting here burning It off with a lighter...

Smoking Kills they say... I'm sure It does after It takes a chain smoker 15 minutes just to get In the pack.... It makes me want to kill someone.

My name is along-for-the-ride and I occasionally suffer from cack-handedness.

I do believe that the causes are modern packaging and impatience.

along-for-the-ride;1456097 wrote: My name is along-for-the-ride and I occasionally suffer from cack-handedness.

I do believe that the causes are modern packaging and impatience. Welcome to the programme Along -for-the-ride. Please take a seat and help yourself to coffee, providing you can get the pots of creamer open.

Relax, you are safe among friends and we're here to help you.

Oscar Farage;1456101 wrote: Welcome to the programme Along -for-the-ride. Please take a seat and help yourself to coffee, providing you can get the pots of creamer open.

Relax, you are safe among friends and we're here to help you.


:)

How to Massage Someone's Hand: 6 Steps - wikiHow

along-for-the-ride;1456145 wrote:

How to Massage Someone's Hand: 6 Steps - wikiHow They've missed out number 4... Now go open a Corned Beef tin after being relaxed,

Oscar Farage;1456147 wrote: They've missed out number 4... Now go open a Corned Beef tin after being relaxed,


:wah:

I can never open stuff.. I'm hopeless at that!

Tabs on the milk, plastic wrappers around the box of teabags, bag of sweets.. pff.. most of the time i need a knife or end up ripping it open with my teeth...

I can never peel a satsuma either... I have to do that with a knife too.

"Coffeemate" creamer bottles. (By Nestle) You first have to unscrew off the big red cap, and then you need to pull on the bottle top opener ring with all your might to rip it off/out. Many times if not careful, it splashes all over! I'm sure many older folks can't do it, it is that hard to do!

(Anyway, it's been awhile since my last visit here, I don't spend too much time on line these days. It's good to see many old timers are still here)

cars;1456425 wrote: "Coffeemate" creamer bottles. (By Nestle) You first have to unscrew off the big red cap, and then you need to pull on the bottle top opener ring with all your might to rip it off/out. Many times if not careful, it splashes all over! I'm sure many older folks can't do it, it is that hard to do!

(Anyway, it's been awhile since my last visit here, I don't spend too much time on line these days. It's good to see many old timers are still here)


And it's wonderful to see you back in the Garden - be welcome and relax in peace :-6

cars;1456425 wrote: "Coffeemate" creamer bottles. (By Nestle) You first have to unscrew off the big red cap, and then you need to pull on the bottle top opener ring with all your might to rip it off/out. Many times if not careful, it splashes all over! I'm sure many older folks can't do it, it is that hard to do!

(Anyway, it's been awhile since my last visit here, I don't spend too much time on line these days. It's good to see many old timers are still here)


Fantastic to see you Cars, you have been missed Sir !!!!

My Mother when having difficulty with modern packaging would snort ' For Goodness sake, how on earth are old people supposed to open this'.... Mum, you're 85 !!!

Oscar Namechange;1456435 wrote: Fantastic to see you Cars, you have been missed Sir !!!!

My Mother when having difficulty with modern packaging would snort ' For Goodness sake, how on earth are old people supposed to open this'.... Mum, you're 85 !!!


MY MIL always used to say: Look at all those old people, it always make me chuckle, as she was "92" at the time. ( many, if not most were younger then her)

She always thought all those other seniors were older then her. Bless her soul, she made it to 5 weeks shy of 95. Still miss her today, 3 years later. She was a wonderful woman, best MIL a SIL could ask for.

cars;1456467 wrote: MY MIL always used to say: Look at all those old people, it always make me chuckle, as she was "92" at the time. ( many, if not most were younger then her)

She always thought all those other seniors were older then her. Bless her soul, she made it to 5 weeks shy of 95. Still miss her today, 3 years later. She was a wonderful woman, best MIL a SIL could ask for. :wah: Yep, exactly the same as my Mother.

Went over one day and she's getting ready to go out and tells me she's going to the community centre for bingo with ' those old people'... but Mum, you're 83...:wah:

Or we'd be out and seeing an elderly person struggling with a stick she'd say ' oh look at the poor old soul'... yeah Mum you're at least 20 years older than him.

Yet the funny thing Is when people tell them how good they look, they'll always say, ' I'm 85 you know'.

Oscar it seems that it means to be clumsy, if's that's the case then I've been that way my whole life. I've discovered that I'm generally a slow paced person, if I get in to big of a hurry, that's when the clumsiness begins. This has always been a great problem for my mother who is naturally fast at doing things so she's been constantly after me my whole life to hurry up. I'm also left-handed which usually gets blamed for a lot of stuff.

Hope6;1456524 wrote: Oscar it seems that it means to be clumsy, if's that's the case then I've been that way my whole life. I've discovered that I'm generally a slow paced person, if I get in to big of a hurry, that's when the clumsiness begins. This has always been a great problem for my mother who is naturally fast at doing things so she's been constantly after me my whole life to hurry up. I'm also left-handed which usually gets blamed for a lot of stuff. We have a lot of left handers In the family but I am right handed. I'm not generally clumsy. I rarely break something unlike my husband who It seems could never wash the dishes without taking a lump out of something but then according to him, that's an accident. I can knit, crochet, etc yet to me a packet of bicuits Is an Impossibility. I've reached the point where I don't even bother trying to open them, I just take a knife to the middle.

I like the Tesco Value Orange Juice - same as all the other brand names, at a fraction of the price. However, they used to come in basic cartons where you lifted a top corner up & tore / cut it across to form a spout. Now, however, they come with a little resealable plastic cap. Unlike other makes that have the same sort of thing & you then peel back the foil seal, the Tesco one is supposed to puncture the inner polythene lining the first time you open it. Does it do it, though? Does it buggery! You end up having to stab it over & over with a pen or similar in order to make a hole big enough for the juice to come out.

Why do they have to make such simple things that do what they're meant to do so complicated.

As for tins. I like the idea of these new-fangled ring-pull ones, but the lids that they peel off are so damned SHARP, and although I haven't come a cropper so far, I'm pretty certain it's just a matter of time. They're scary.

Oscar I quit even having glass drinking glasses years ago except for very special occasions because I broke them all! As for opening packages I've found scissors come in very handy.

Hope6;1457585 wrote: Oscar I quit even having glass drinking glasses years ago except for very special occasions because I broke them all! As for opening packages I've found scissors come in very handy. A lovely day out with my husband today was momentarily marred when we got ourselves hot dogs and burgers. Sitting down to enjoy, my hot dog Is going cold while I become more and more vexed with those sachets of ketchup and mustard. Nails and teeth could not even help me so In the end, I stabbed them with a plastic fork which then broke.