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Got a horror story? I'll start with a wild one from the past few days...

I noticed my driver's license was due to expire. I had previously tried to renew it, but was told that they no longer allowed people to renew it too early, you had to wait until it was within 90 days of expiration. So I waited until I got a notice in the mail and proceeded to go down to the office.

As usual, I expected a 2 to 3 hour wait, that's pretty much normal for our little town of 30,000. (We only have one DMV office and it’s usually staffed by only 4 people.)Well, things had changed in the 4 years I had been away. They now had a line to see a woman who would give you a number so that you could wait in line. Typical, eh? After about an hour of waiting, a woman came out and told everyone, "If you are waiting to get your Driver's License, the computers just went down statewide." There was a little grumbling, and I politely asked, "About how long do you expect them to be down?"

Attendant: "I don't know."

Me:"How long are they usually down?" (sneaky of me, since she now had to admit to everyone that the computers went up and down all the time.)

Attendant: "Usually about two hours."

Not satisfied, I asked, "Have they been down previously today?"

Attendant: (forgetting her crowd) "Oh yes, they go up and down all day long."

(Then she suddenly saw that the crowd was glaring at her.)

Attendant: "You can wait if you want, but it's up to you."

Me: "I'll take my chances."

Well I waited another hour, but the computers never came back online. Now I had a problem, my license was due to expire in two days, and unfortunately, that was a Sunday. Like all good State-run operations, with complete disregard to their customers, the DMV didn't open on the weekends and closed at 4:00pm everyday before anyone could get out of work.

So I asked the woman at the counter:

Me: "Do you suppose I could get a piece of paper stating that your computers were down today?"

Woman: "Why?"

Me: "Well, so in case I get pulled over on Monday coming here, I won't get in trouble."

Woman:" No, just talk to the judge."

Me: "But if you'd just give me a statement, I could avoid wasting the city's time."

Woman: "You had 90 days to take care of this."

Me: "And I'm HERE inside the 90-day window. I took care of my responsibility to get here, you're not taking care of your responsibility to renew my license."

Woman: "That's not my problem."

Me: Yes...yes it is. That's your responsibility."

Woman: "No, it's not."

Me: "Look...what am I supposed to tell the officer if I get pulled over?"

Woman: "Don't get pulled over."

So I returned on Monday, looking over both shoulders to make sure I wasn't being tailed, and being scrupulously careful not to speed.

After another three-hour wait I was finally in front of the "woman" again.

Woman: "Well you're in luck! The computers are up today!"

Me: (failing to see anything funny in the situation.) "Yes, what incredible luck."

Woman: "May I have your old license?"

Me: "Here it is."

Woman: "This license is expired."

Me: “¦.

Woman: (Deciding that the savage look in my eye was an indicator that she shouldn't continue on that course) "Let's run you through the computer."

I wasn't worried, after all I hadn't had a ticket in a quarter century, and had previously renewed my license two times at this very place.

Woman: "Hmmm...it seems you have a PCPS hold on your license."

Me: "A pukpus?"

Woman: (eyeing my like a serial killer) "Have you ever been to Arizona?"

Me: "Yes, but I haven't lived there since the '80s!"

Woman: "Well you won't be renewing your license today, call this number."

So I go home, wondering what in the world could be wrong. Did I forget to pay a ticket? Is there a warrant out for my arrest? I'm a blasted schoolteacher for Pete's Sake! I don't even double park! I call up Arizona from my house.

Operator: (After a 15 minute wait on hold) "May I help you?"

Me: "Yes, I have a PCPS hold on my license and would like to find out what's wrong."

Woman: "Oh I'll have to transfer you to the next floor."

Second operator: "May I help you?"

Me: "Yes, I'm trying to find out why my license is on hold." ( I give her my information.)

Woman: "Okay, we see that you had a ticket."

Me: "Did I pay it?"

Woman: "Yes, yes you did!"

Me: "So why am I on hold?"

Woman: "Because you never paid the fee to reinstate your Arizona driver's license."

Me: "But I never had an Arizona driver's license!"

Woman: (scans the records) "That's true, you didn't.

"

Me: "Okay, I'm confused. How can I pay to reinstate a license I never had?"

Woman: "That's not my problem." (Apparently, they include this phrase in DMV training, since I had now heard it from two separate states.)

Me: "How much is the fee?"

Woman: "Ten dollars."

Me: "Can I take care of this now?"

Woman: "Do you have a credit card?"

Me: "Yes."

Woman: "No problem! Let me transfer you to the next floor!"

This time I waited for thirty minutes on hold, and worse yet, they had no music, just a guy saying, "we're sorry..." over and over again. "Yeah, I thought, that describes this operation pretty exactly."

Finally....

Operator: "Ok, can I help you?"

Me: "I'd like to pay my fine."

Operator: "It's ten dollars, are you putting it on debit?"

Me: "Yes."

I calculated the amount of time on hold...one hour. That my lost of time actually bigger than the fine.

I went back to the DMV the next day to renew my license. The computers were working. I had to wait an hour, but I was happy that I could finally get out of this bureaucratic whirlpool.

Another different lady behind the counter greeted me, then announced, “This license is suspended¦

How did you lot manage to get a man on the moon ?

No cops up there to stop them & check their licences.

Bruv;1457144 wrote: How did you lot manage to get a man on the moon ?


That was before all the computerization and automation to make life more efficient.

There are closer DMV offices where I live but I can only go to "state" operated offices to renew my commercial license. I double check on the DMV website and it indicates I must go to the usual one, some 42 miles from where I live.

Office opens at 7:00 a.m. so I leave my house at 6:00 a.m.

It was March, dark, freezing cold, wind blowing like crazy. My pickup truck does not do well in strong winds so I reduce speed accordingly. First leg of the trip, some 18 miles I am traveling north into the wind. Next leg of the trip I go west, the wind pushing against the right side of my truck.

Now I am finding that this road had either iced over or was icing over. Reduce speed again. doing 25-40 mph.

Now I am maybe two miles from my destination when I am blown across the road, down the side of a grassy embankment perhaps 20 to 30 feet. Could have been worse cause as steep as it was the truck did not roll over.

Now I'm stuck. I get out and two cars stop. A lady calls down offering me a ride, which I accept. She drives me to the DMV. I take care of my license.

Lady at the DMV allows me to use their phone to call for a tow truck.

It took a while as I wasn't the only fool out on the road that morning.

Just before I leave, the lady informs me that on another day I could have used the office I passed just 17 miles from my home.

Saint, your story could be a skit on SNL.

I can only relate my own experience.

Every time I have visited our DMV office here in Champaign, Illinois, the staff has been helpful, courteous, efficient and friendly in spite of VERY busy conditions.

The only problem I EVER had there was that once when I renewed my operator's license, the lady who printed the new license had mispellled "Champaign". I noticed this immediately, brought it to her attention, and she apologized and printed a corrected license.

tude dog;1457154 wrote: Saint, your story could be a skit on SNL.


Yeah, I felt like I was in a Monty Python skit when it was happening. I'll tell you, it sounds funny now, but I was about to go ballistic at the time...I had to remember that if I pissed any of them off, I'd NEVER get my license. Stupid petty civil servants. Pfft.

tude dog;1457152 wrote:

just before i leave, the lady informs me that on another day i could have used the office i passed just 17 miles from my home.


lol!

oh my.... Seriously? That must have been so :-5

I suppose that now is a bad time to tell you that you could have renewed your license online.

I had to go to the DMV recently. There's no office in my little town, so I had to drive over the mountain to the big crowded valley with all the people. I knew that there were a couple of different offices I could go to so I brought up the web page the see where they were. On the web page I saw a link for appointments - that's new. From there I discovered that the page for each office now shows the wait time for appointments and walk-ins. It also displayed the wait times for nearby offices. It said 9 minutes wait time for those with appts at one office so I made one, figuring the time it would take me to drive there.

When I got there, there were separate lines for appts and walk-ins. They gave me a number and I sat in a comfortable chair for 12 minutes watching the news on the big screen. What an improvement! Wow! They actually improved efficiency and cut the wait times even though they had had staff reductions. I was pleasantly impressed.

Lars,,,:yh_rotfl :yh_rotfl

OMG - I'm laughing - my hubby just renewed his license on-line

1/2 through the B.S. - computers went down...:yh_rotfl :yh_rotfl true fact.

Saint - not sure how you held it together?

My Hubby would've been ballistic:-5

I'm in AZ - :wah:

Patsy

We have had to get new Driver's licenses each time we have moved (6 times in 20 years). And, of course, because we are coming from another state, we have had to go to the DMV each time.

The process has usually been relatively painless, even though time-consuming. I have to say that Colorado has the easiest process I have been through. The worst was North Carolina. They waited until the whole process was complete and it was time to pay up that they told me they did not accept checks. Since the state required proof of residence in the form of a Driver's license to take a check, and I didn't have my driver's license until after I had paid for it, they could not accept a check. At first I thought they were joking, but it became clear that they were not. (though they seemed to enjoy my predicament) and for the same reason, they would not accept my debit VISA card (?) So I had to drive to the nearest ATM (about 12 miles), and extract cash, and drive back to the DMV office. On the way back, I was rear-ended by a little old lady, and ticketed for driving without a license. They would not let me drive away. they impounded my car, and I had to call my wife to come pick me up. I made it back to DMV just in time before closing to pay and receive my license, and then just made it to the impound lot to retrieve my car. It cost me $150 to get my car back. (This time I had my license and they would take my check) Lesson learned: Always have cash in your pocket.

I shall repeat.....

Bruv;1457144 wrote: How did you lot manage to get a man on the moon ?