Horrible !

Nomad · Post by **Nomad** » Sat Oct 11, 2008 7:06 pm

When my wife is running late or off her routine I get sick with worry. I wait for the police to call or knock on the door, I imagine her in a terrible car crash and dying somewhere.

It horrible.

Does anyone else go through this ?

qsducks · Post by **qsducks** » Sat Oct 11, 2008 7:09 pm

Ummm, that would be no:wah:

Nomad · Post by **Nomad** » Sat Oct 11, 2008 7:30 pm

Maybe.

qsducks · Post by **qsducks** » Sat Oct 11, 2008 7:32 pm

Horrible is watching the Boston Red Sox vs the Rays and it's a tie in the 6th inning. I'm so depressed.

qsducks · Post by **qsducks** » Sat Oct 11, 2008 7:40 pm

Ian;1016892 wrote: definitely maybe..

we only have an average number of heartbeats Nomad, why waist them:-3

fear creates stress and stress increases the heartbeat :-6

sorry for the lecture but it's true.. sit on the beach, hug a tree or stroke a pet :-6

And don't be like me freaking out on the Boston Red Sox!:wah:

Nomad · Post by **Nomad** » Sat Oct 11, 2008 7:40 pm

Ian;1016892 wrote: definitely maybe..

we only have an average number of heartbeats Nomad, why waist them:-3

fear creates stress and stress increases the heartbeat :-6

sorry for the lecture but it's true.. sit on the beach, hug a tree or stroke a pet :-6

You can lecture me, s ok

Patsy Warnick · Post by **Patsy Warnick** » Sat Oct 11, 2008 7:43 pm

That's my Husband....Definately

I'm late - off my norm - he's called around - he's pacing - the Garage Door is open for Me...:wah:

Yeh, he definately worries.

and if He's late - he now apologizes.. Like I was Worried:wah:Pacing:wah:...

Patsy

qsducks · Post by **qsducks** » Sat Oct 11, 2008 7:47 pm

Ok, enought about baseball. I was venting. I usually wait for hubs if he is working at night. Leave the lights on & the turn off the tv. We both have cell phones and I do call him and ask "where the heck are you".:wah:

ButterflyPrincess · Post by **ButterflyPrincess** » Sat Oct 11, 2008 7:47 pm

Seriously yes. My husband drives all day long- 14 hours a day. I always have the worst thoughts in my head. there are a lot of as5hole drivers out there and anything could happen at anytime.

Patsy Warnick · Post by **Patsy Warnick** » Sat Oct 11, 2008 7:58 pm

Ian

Are you telling us - you don't worry about anything??

I realise it's damaging - but, you state like you go into a Zone and all is good.?

Everyone get's stressed about something? For my husband it's me, he worries.

What's your's,,, money - relationship- kids-church-stockmarket-job ?

see everyone's worried about something.

Patsy

Nomad · Post by **Nomad** » Sat Oct 11, 2008 8:04 pm

Ian;1016903 wrote: The mind is an evil tool, I wish you could control it, do any of you meditate?

or is this suggestion incredibly stupid

Worry is like self mutilation, it's called trauma based mind control, you see it on your TV every day..

Well I dont obsess but if its late and shes not home my senses are accutely aware and Im poised to rush off if needed.

Might be a built in defense mechanism or survival type mode.

Accountable · Post by **Accountable** » Sat Oct 11, 2008 8:39 pm

Nomad;1016858 wrote: When my wife is running late or off her routine I get sick with worry. I wait for the police to call or knock on the door, I imagine her in a terrible car crash and dying somewhere.

It horrible.

Does anyone else go through this ?
No. Why? should I? What have you heard? :-3

BTS · Post by **BTS** » Sat Oct 11, 2008 9:23 pm

Accountable;1016926 wrote: No. Why? should I? What have you heard? :-3

You haven't Heard???

OOPS I gotta go stir the beans

abbey · Post by **abbey** » Sun Oct 12, 2008 12:42 am

Nomad;1016858 wrote: When my wife is running late or off her routine I get sick with worry. I wait for the police to call or knock on the door, I imagine her in a terrible car crash and dying somewhere.

It horrible.

Does anyone else go through this ?
Everytime you dont post for a while. :-4

I worry you are sat in the corner of a dark cellar surrounded by tinned food with a tinfoil hat on.

Chezzie · Post by **Chezzie** » Sun Oct 12, 2008 2:02 am

Nomad;1016858 wrote: When my wife is running late or off her routine I get sick with worry. I wait for the police to call or knock on the door, I imagine her in a terrible car crash and dying somewhere.

It horrible.

Does anyone else go through this ?

YEP.

Mine started as a child, my mum worked and always returned home at 3.30pm. If she wasnt home, id pace up and down to the hall window worrying where she was and what may have happened to her on route from work.

This transferred to hubby once we had our own home. My worry would be worse if I was given a time they would be home by, if 5 minutes had past id be getting worried sick, also my hubby is a scaffolder/roofer and so id worry he would of had an accident. If he said, im popping to so and so's for an hour and that hour passed and he wasnt home, id imagine the worst.

Then we had children and my anxiety lessened with having so much more going on around me. Now unfortunately i'm a apron string mum, I find it hard to let them go out and worry about them constantly when they go to the park, they are 10 and 9 years old, both girls.

Out of interest Nomad, do you also worry about the bad stuff that may be going on in world as you try to sleep?

I lie there worrying about the homeless, who's getting raped, murdered, abused till at times it has made me cry. I try not to go down that path and if Im aware of my mind going there, I get up and get a drink.

I used to be so carefree, I worked in Spain when I was 20. I travelled there on my own the second time I went out after being home for xmas. I would go places on my own. Since getting older, I wouldnt dream of going into a pub or a cafe on my own, I walk my dog and if I enter a secluded area, my imagination runs riot.

Accountable · Post by **Accountable** » Sun Oct 12, 2008 3:49 am

jimbo;1016969 wrote: and you should try being a spurs fan right now :-5:-5I know what you mean. I hope Ginobilli's ankle heals quickly or we're in big trouble this year.

mikeinie · Post by **mikeinie** » Sun Oct 12, 2008 4:05 am

OK, my wife, late is the norm. I would be more shocked if she showed up on time and actually started to follow a routine.

I would only start to worry if it was accumulating into many hours and maybe getting late into the night with no phone call.

chonsigirl · Post by **chonsigirl** » Sun Oct 12, 2008 4:07 am

Yes, I worry all the time when I run late and can't get home fast enough, the dark times when I know the nurse is gone and my husband is alone. The neighbors tell me he walks out to get the mail by himself, without a walker. It would usually be a good thing, but not unsupervised. I worry alot he will go up the stairs, and if he falls, no one is there until I get home.

Odie · Post by **Odie** » Sun Oct 12, 2008 5:47 am

when my husband is running real late from work, I go nutso, worrying.......he drives the big 54 footers, transport trucks, so I worry!:-5

pinkchick · Post by **pinkchick** » Sun Oct 12, 2008 6:12 am

Nomad;1016858 wrote: When my wife is running late or off her routine I get sick with worry. I wait for the police to call or knock on the door, I imagine her in a terrible car crash and dying somewhere.

It horrible.

Does anyone else go through this ?

Don't get me started!

Peg · Post by **Peg** » Sun Oct 12, 2008 6:25 am

Nomad;1016858 wrote: When my wife is running late or off her routine I get sick with worry. I wait for the police to call or knock on the door, I imagine her in a terrible car crash and dying somewhere.

It horrible.

Does anyone else go through this ?

My first thought was I am so glad I'm not the only one. I feel normal. Then I thought, this is Nomad making me feel normal and I got skeered. :wah: :-4

I don't worry when your wife is late, but I worry when my husband is late and about go insane if my kids are late.

The Rob · Post by **The Rob** » Sun Oct 12, 2008 6:58 am

Nomad, I'm used to my missus taking a long time coming home because the woman can think of an errand for every six feet of travel. What always worries me is her running afoul of the kitchen rug while handling boiling liquids, getting up on ladders to hang plants, or walking down the stairs.

Thinking of it now tenses me right the Hell up.

Carolly · Post by **Carolly** » Sun Oct 12, 2008 7:09 am

Nomad;1016858 wrote: When my wife is running late or off her routine I get sick with worry. I wait for the police to call or knock on the door, I imagine her in a terrible car crash and dying somewhere.

It horrible.

Does anyone else go through this ?Ever since I remember I have gone through this insecurity (in my case) and blame certain things happening to me in my childhood and then in my adult life.I quite envy the ones that are lay back and take things as they come.....but yes Nomad I know exactly how you feel at such times....the sick feeling....the non concentration on anything.......yes these panic attacks I believe are the worst type.

Post by **Oscar Namechange** » Sun Oct 12, 2008 8:45 am

How can any-one say they love their wife/partner if they don't worry when they're late?

The two don't go together in my book.

My husband worries when i'm not late but that's another thing he has.

I worry about all my family, my brothers, sisters etc. There are so many lunatics on the road.

We have a catalogue of fatality's here where even the police have mown some innocent down while in high persuit.

Our local police told me off the record that they have stopped chasing kids on motorbikes (Vespa's) even though they are a menace round here, because they have a habit of crashing into innocent people.

flopstock · Post by **flopstock** » Sun Oct 12, 2008 9:21 am

Nomad;1016858 wrote: When my wife is running late or off her routine I get sick with worry. I wait for the police to call or knock on the door, I imagine her in a terrible car crash and dying somewhere.

It horrible.

Does anyone else go through this ?

I used to with my ex-husband. You could set the clock by when he got home, left the house, did specific things... anytime he was off by more then 45 minutes, yikes! He was one of those that would call to tell us if he was outside his time range, until one time...went out with the guys to celebrate a new contract and didn't call to let me know..

And then he showed up, just fine... in the middle of the snowstorm, 5 hrs late, smelling of beer. After that, I just didn't care anymore. It was very freeing, in a sad way.

I divorced him a few years later...

along-for-the-ride · Post by **along-for-the-ride** » Sun Oct 12, 2008 9:41 am

Nomad;1016858 wrote: When my wife is running late or off her routine I get sick with worry. I wait for the police to call or knock on the door, I imagine her in a terrible car crash and dying somewhere.

It horrible.

Does anyone else go through this ?

Hope she made it home okay.

SlipStream · Post by **SlipStream** » Sun Oct 12, 2008 10:01 am

Nomad;1016858 wrote: When my wife is running late or off her routine I get sick with worry. I wait for the police to call or knock on the door, I imagine her in a terrible car crash and dying somewhere.

It horrible.

Does anyone else go through this ?

bring it on down my friend or ya'll exploed...

Trunk Monkey · Post by **Trunk Monkey** » Sun Oct 12, 2008 10:04 am

I never worry about hubby. No matter where he is, if he's going to be late, he will call me and let me know.

Lon · Post by **Lon** » Sun Oct 12, 2008 10:04 am

Nomad;1016858 wrote: When my wife is running late or off her routine I get sick with worry. I wait for the police to call or knock on the door, I imagine her in a terrible car crash and dying somewhere.

It horrible.

Does anyone else go through this ?

Yep---------My wife has a regular routine and Friday night she was off of it and I became worried. She will generally call me on her cell, but her battery was dead and she was in heavy traffic.

Flora · Post by **Flora** » Sun Oct 12, 2008 1:50 pm

Yeah I do this. You can't help it if you are that way inclined. If I ring his mobile and he doesn't answer, I just keep ringing it and ringing it until he does then I get cranky cos he didn't answer!

If you're a worrier, you will probably always be a worrier. I would say chill out, but I know what you mean! People should just be on time. :-3

CARLA · Post by **CARLA** » Sun Oct 12, 2008 4:15 pm

Nomie I have learned over the many years I have been on this planet that worrying doesn't change anything. It doesn't solve the issue, or make it happen or not happen it just makes you sick. What will be will be. :yh_peace

Nomad · Post by **Nomad** » Mon Oct 13, 2008 3:10 am

fuzzy butt;1017925 wrote: hmmm In my experience it's part and parcel of a possesive trait. You'd prefer to think of a car crash because the thought of your wife having an affair is too unbearable to think about. I bet you question her as to her whereabouts when she finally arrives home? If you're close to your partner and they are lying in a ditch someowhere and dying you'll know you'll feel it ...........So stop worrying because you will transfer that worry onto your partner and instead of thinking of her own welfare she'll be constantly thinking of how you feel all of the time . and that's not healthy.

cheers. that'll be $140 . would you like to make another appointment?:wah::wah:

No I dont question her like that. Im just relieved. Its not a posessive thing its more of a nurturing thing.

Bez · Post by **Bez** » Mon Oct 13, 2008 3:44 am

Nomad;1016858 wrote: When my wife is running late or off her routine I get sick with worry. I wait for the police to call or knock on the door, I imagine her in a terrible car crash and dying somewhere.

It horrible.

Does anyone else go through this ?

I used to go through this when I was first married and then with my kids until they were teenagers....... I would think that the 'advent' of the mobile phone (cellphone) affords us much better communication and alleviates these concerns......

Chezzie · Post by **Chezzie** » Mon Oct 13, 2008 3:46 am

fuzzy butt;1017925 wrote: hmmm In my experience it's part and parcel of a possesive trait. You'd prefer to think of a car crash because the thought of your wife having an affair is too unbearable to think about. I bet you question her as to her whereabouts when she finally arrives home? If you're close to your partner and they are lying in a ditch someowhere and dying you'll know you'll feel it ...........So stop worrying because you will transfer that worry onto your partner and instead of thinking of her own welfare she'll be constantly thinking of how you feel all of the time . and that's not healthy.

cheers. that'll be $140 . would you like to make another appointment?

:wah::wah:

Another appt...I want my money back:D, it doesnt even enter my head thats he is up to no good, I trust him 100% & after nearly 20 years he has never given me cause too, I just worry he may of gotten in an accident or someone hurt him ect..

fuzzy butt;1017936 wrote: hmmm we could go into your fears of abandonment..........but that will be another 5 sessions.

May I ask something guys ?...........For those who worry ? Did you worry much as a child? Was there ever a time when you felt abandoned as a child. I'm not talking about actually being abandoned but the feeling of being left alone and vulnerable?

Just something to think about .

Dad was crap, they divorced when I was 2 yrs but mum brought us up well and she had a good family that helped out, she remarried when I was 8 years and my stepfather is more of a father to me than my biological father. So thats a no too:wah:

Nomad · Post by **Nomad** » Mon Oct 13, 2008 3:46 am

Bez;1018332 wrote: I used to go through this when I was first married and then with my kids until they were teenagers....... I would think that the 'advent' of the mobile phone (cellphone) affords us much better communication and alleviates these concerns......

True but the cell phone will be the death of us all yakking on it while driving.

Bez · Post by **Bez** » Mon Oct 13, 2008 3:53 am

Nomad;1018337 wrote: True but the cell phone will be the death of us all yakking on it while driving.

Is this illegal over there ?. It is in the UK but few people take any notice...makes me mad !....specially when they've got 'babbies' in the car.

Nomad · Post by **Nomad** » Mon Oct 13, 2008 4:02 am

Bez;1018345 wrote: Is this illegal over there ?. It is in the UK but few people take any notice...makes me mad !....specially when they've got 'babbies' in the car.

Some states yes, some no. Either way I doubt it deters many.

The same way the speed limit is 60 but my car rocks as they fly by at 97

sunny104 · Post by **sunny104** » Mon Oct 13, 2008 7:22 am

I always worry when I'm not with my hubby and kids. I'm only content when we're all together.