My Sacred Portal

Nomad · Post by **Nomad** » Mon Jan 19, 2009 8:51 am

My sacred portal has been violated.

To my shock and horror the Dr. asked me to drop my trousers and bend over. He then proceeded to de-flower the sanctity of the one thing I held to be above and beyond without question pure and free of corruption.

I have no alternative now but to accept that I Nomad can no longer take refuge nor solace in a future free from further intrusions.

As far as Im concerned my portal has become a tainted and whorish abomination and I shall live with that shame for all my days.

Its become a free for all for any perverse person disguised under the cloak of a lab coat and wearing a dime store rubber glove.

With much angst and unwillingly Nomad is now playing for the other team.

It wasnt supposed to be like this......

chonsigirl · Post by **chonsigirl** » Mon Jan 19, 2009 8:52 am

They never said science was an easy road to follow.................:wah:

sunny104 · Post by **sunny104** » Mon Jan 19, 2009 8:57 am

you're not a virgin anymore?!?!

sacred portal is my new favorite term...

Kindle · Post by **Kindle** » Mon Jan 19, 2009 9:08 am

Nomad, you had the right to

just say NO.......................

Chezzie · Post by **Chezzie** » Mon Jan 19, 2009 9:30 am

Oh ****:D

sunny104 · Post by **sunny104** » Mon Jan 19, 2009 9:33 am

did you get a brazillian before you went??

CARLA · Post by **CARLA** » Mon Jan 19, 2009 10:27 am

:yh_rotfl :yh_rotfl Poor guy, quit your complaining your will have to go through it all over again next year, and the year after that. Welcome to the world of aging and medical tests that they wouldn't do on animals...!!

You haven't experienced anything till you have a Sigmoidoscopy. Lets just say refuse it if ever your asked to have one and state with out pause you want a Colonoscopy. Trust me on the Nomie and remember what I say.

[QUOTE]As far as Im concerned my portal has become a tainted and whorish abomination and I shall live with that shame for all my days.

Its become a free for all for any perverse person disguised under the cloak of a lab coat and wearing a dime store rubber glove.

With much angst and unwillingly Nomad is now playing for the other team.

It wasnt supposed to be like this......[/QUOTE]

flopstock · Post by **flopstock** » Mon Jan 19, 2009 1:08 pm

Nomad;1113128 wrote: My sacred portal has been violated.

To my shock and horror the Dr. asked me to drop my trousers and bend over. He then proceeded to de-flower the sanctity of the one thing I held to be above and beyond without question pure and free of corruption.

I have no alternative now but to accept that I Nomad can no longer take refuge nor solace in a future free from further intrusions.

As far as Im concerned my portal has become a tainted and whorish abomination and I shall live with that shame for all my days.

Its become a free for all for any perverse person disguised under the cloak of a lab coat and wearing a dime store rubber glove.

With much angst and unwillingly Nomad is now playing for the other team.

It wasnt supposed to be like this......
go look in the mirror... i bet you're smiling...

:yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl

Chezzie · Post by **Chezzie** » Mon Jan 19, 2009 1:34 pm

Poor Nomad got sidescuttled, should of raised your stormflap:D

Post by **Oscar Namechange** » Mon Jan 19, 2009 1:37 pm

I hope the rubber glove was later safely detonated in a controlled area where no harm could come to small children and animals.

shelbell · Post by **shelbell** » Mon Jan 19, 2009 2:42 pm

Poor Nomie....just think of what us women have to go thru and your exam won't seem so bad. :yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl

along-for-the-ride · Post by **along-for-the-ride** » Mon Jan 19, 2009 2:46 pm

Nomad, I understand the experience to be a hassle. But, you should have cracked the whip, asserted yourself, and rectified the situation.

I hope you are sitting on a soft place...............if you have to sit...that is.

Odie · Post by **Odie** » Mon Jan 19, 2009 4:13 pm

OMG, no, really...........

welcome to the world of testing, was anyone harmed in this event:yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl

Imladris · Post by **Imladris** » Tue Jan 20, 2009 6:50 am

I hope he bought you dinner first

Clodhopper · Post by **Clodhopper** » Tue Jan 20, 2009 7:04 am

:wah::wah::wah:

Poor Nomad! You have my sympathy. The same thing happened to me a couple of years ago and I remember thinking as it happened that some people paid good money to have it done to them....

The fact that the doctor was an attractive female Aussie didn't help, either.:yh_rotfl

Peg · Post by **Peg** » Tue Jan 20, 2009 7:06 am

Nomad;1113128 wrote: My sacred portal has been violated.

To my shock and horror the Dr. asked me to drop my trousers and bend over. He then proceeded to de-flower the sanctity of the one thing I held to be above and beyond without question pure and free of corruption.

I have no alternative now but to accept that I Nomad can no longer take refuge nor solace in a future free from further intrusions.

As far as Im concerned my portal has become a tainted and whorish abomination and I shall live with that shame for all my days.

Its become a free for all for any perverse person disguised under the cloak of a lab coat and wearing a dime store rubber glove.

With much angst and unwillingly Nomad is now playing for the other team.

It wasnt supposed to be like this......

Are you worried because you liked it?

:yh_rotfl

flopstock · Post by **flopstock** » Tue Jan 20, 2009 10:47 am

Imladris;1114118 wrote: I hope he bought you dinner first:yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl

Odie · Post by **Odie** » Tue Jan 20, 2009 3:35 pm

along-for-the-ride;1113559 wrote: Nomad, I understand the experience to be a hassle. But, you should have cracked the whip, asserted yourself, and rectified the situation.

I hope you are sitting on a soft place...............if you have to sit...that is.

:yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl

flopstock · Post by **flopstock** » Tue Jan 20, 2009 3:38 pm

They say the trick is to just relax and push back against it.... what's your first hand opinion?

:yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl

Odie · Post by **Odie** » Tue Jan 20, 2009 3:43 pm

flopstock;1114558 wrote: They say the trick is to just relax and push back against it.... what's your first hand opinion?

:yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl

and don't forget the KY!:yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl

minks · Post by **minks** » Tue Jan 20, 2009 7:47 pm

Would it be inappropriate to welcome you back at this point????