Jester!!!!!!! I got the magazine about 'man has ears ripped off by dog' for you

Post by **Oscar Namechange** » Sat Mar 07, 2009 11:03 pm

I can't put a link on for the story as i have to download the whole magazine but this is the women's magazine story that made you spit your water over your monitor in another thread.

Download digital versions of your favourite magazines!*The Digital Newsagent

If you look at the front cover of this magazine at the far top right hand corner, there is the ad for the story i told you about. Inside the mag they showed the ears... or should i say, no ears. Musn't laugh Oscar, do not laugh.

If you look at the top far right of the cover you'll see another story called 'My Beavers looking for love'.

In the bottom left hand corner is the ad for a story about a dog who went missing and was found in a bra factory wearing a 42DD over it's head.

Told you we didn't have mags with knitting in them any more.

Post by **Peter Lake** » Sun Mar 08, 2009 8:28 pm

Did you see this Jester?

Post by **Peter Lake** » Sun Mar 08, 2009 8:32 pm

Jester;1154121 wrote: ahahaha I just did!

:yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl

Well the add says "they've come along way baby"!

Pete do ya let her read this kind of thing? :wah: I read this mag when she gets it. The stories are not really to be laughed at but it's the title's they put as an advertisment for the story. Where do they get them?

qsducks · Post by **qsducks** » Sun Mar 08, 2009 8:35 pm

Peter Lake;1154123 wrote: I read this mag when she gets it. The stories are not really to be laughed at but it's the title's they put as an advertisment for the story. Where do they get them?

From the same place they get "Woman attacks mouse with dirty sock and flushes it":wah:

Post by **Peter Lake** » Sun Mar 08, 2009 8:37 pm

qsducks;1154126 wrote: From the same place they get "Woman attacks mouse with dirty sock and flushes it":wah: Hey, they pay good money for stories like that :wah:

Post by **Peter Lake** » Sun Mar 08, 2009 8:38 pm

Jester;1154128 wrote: :yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl

I think Ducks has it!

I cracked up at your comment about wearing his glasses though, ya have to laugh at life a little bit. :wah: I'm waiting for the follow up story.. 'Earless man gets contact lenses.'

qsducks · Post by **qsducks** » Sun Mar 08, 2009 8:41 pm

Peter Lake;1154129 wrote: Hey, they pay good money for stories like that :wah:

Where's my millions? Jeez, if I had known that I could have gotten paid for running over squirrels two years ago. It became a running joke with my daughter & her friend in the fall. I have yet to hit one this year.:wah:

Post by **Peter Lake** » Sun Mar 08, 2009 8:44 pm

qsducks;1154133 wrote: Where's my millions? Jeez, if I had known that I could have gotten paid for running over squirrels two years ago. It became a running joke with my daughter & her friend in the fall. I have yet to hit one this year.:wah: You'd be in trouble with Oscar. We came across hoardes of frogs crossing the road one evening and she made me park up and walk rather than risk running them over. Then she picked them up in her hands to put them out of harms way.

I'll tip the magazine off about you. Great story line... 'The mad squirrel murderer'. :wah:

qsducks · Post by **qsducks** » Sun Mar 08, 2009 8:50 pm

Peter Lake;1154138 wrote: You'd be in trouble with Oscar. We came across hoardes of frogs crossing the road one evening and she made me park up and walk rather than risk running them over. Then she picked them up in her hands to put them out of harms way.

I'll tip the magazine off about you. Great story line... 'The mad squirrel murderer'. :wah:

Hey at least it's a known fact that squirrel breed worse than rabbits and the young when born in late September are rather stupid and panic when cars approach, hence squirrel dna on my tires. Haven't hit one since 2008. I should be proud but the running joke with the kids is "hit it".:wah:. Yes, I have warped my children's brains by accident.

Post by **Peter Lake** » Sun Mar 08, 2009 8:53 pm

qsducks;1154141 wrote: Hey at least it's a known fact that squirrel breed worse than rabbits and the young when born in late September are rather stupid and panic when cars approach, hence squirrel dna on my tires. Haven't hit one since 2008. I should be proud but the running joke with the kids is "hit it".:wah:. Yes, I have warped my children's brains by accident. I don't think I've ever hit a squirrel or anything come to that. I know if i did hit one, Oscar would be in the road giving it mouth to mouth. :wah:

qsducks · Post by **qsducks** » Sun Mar 08, 2009 9:21 pm

Peter Lake;1154147 wrote: I don't think I've ever hit a squirrel or anything come to that. I know if i did hit one, Oscar would be in the road giving it mouth to mouth. :wah:

Over here dude, that squirrel would be as flat as a pancake with my tires.:wah:

Post by **Peter Lake** » Sun Mar 08, 2009 9:30 pm

qsducks;1154171 wrote: Over here dude, that squirrel would be as flat as a pancake with my tires.:wah: Here it's hedgehogs that end up as pancakes but i like the little critters and have been known to park up to rescue one from the road before. Do you have hedgehogs in America?

You do know that Oscar is talking about a holiday in the States and coming to visit you don't you? She wants this cheesesteak thingymabob you've mentioned.

qsducks · Post by **qsducks** » Sun Mar 08, 2009 9:40 pm

Peter Lake;1154176 wrote: Here it's hedgehogs that end up as pancakes but i like the little critters and have been known to park up to rescue one from the road before. Do you have hedgehogs in America?

You do know that Oscar is talking about a holiday in the States and coming to visit you don't you? She wants this cheesesteak thingymabob you've mentioned.

Your Oscar is a gem! Still have your christmas card up (I haven't taken them down yet except for a few), I guess we have hedgehogs, never seen one:wah: but they could pass as a small annoying child:wah:. We have moles, rats (yes in suburbia), mice, racoons, squirrels and occasionally the great horned owl (which I love) he takes care of the aforementioned.:wah:

If you two visit Philadelphia..stay at the Embassy Suites and visit Geno's Steaks or Pat's Steaks. Now, the trick is to say it quick...cheesesteak with wiz your choice of cheese. Do not order it wiz (Cheese wiz), totally disgusting. Would love to take you two on the Ride the Ducks (summer only) and to downtown Philly. Oscar would love it and so would you. And the friendliest peeps this side of America. Yeah, we have our quirks, but this is a really cool town.:wah:

Post by **Peter Lake** » Sun Mar 08, 2009 9:59 pm

qsducks;1154178 wrote: Your Oscar is a gem! Still have your christmas card up (I haven't taken them down yet except for a few), I guess we have hedgehogs, never seen one:wah: but they could pass as a small annoying child:wah:. We have moles, rats (yes in suburbia), mice, racoons, squirrels and occasionally the great horned owl (which I love) he takes care of the aforementioned.:wah:

If you two visit Philadelphia..stay at the Embassy Suites and visit Geno's Steaks or Pat's Steaks. Now, the trick is to say it quick...cheesesteak with wiz your choice of cheese. Do not order it wiz (Cheese wiz), totally disgusting. Would love to take you two on the Ride the Ducks (summer only) and to downtown Philly. Oscar would love it and so would you. And the friendliest peeps this side of America. Yeah, we have our quirks, but this is a really cool town.:wah: She actually loves America and wanted to go to Georgia very much this year. I don't know what my health will be like a few months from now but she could still go and take a pal. She'd love to meet up with you and i bet you'd get on well.

We get all the above except the racoons. Are they the smelly one's?

Post by **Peter Lake** » Sun Mar 08, 2009 10:03 pm

qsducks;1154178 wrote: Your Oscar is a gem! Still have your christmas card up (I haven't taken them down yet except for a few), I guess we have hedgehogs, never seen one:wah: but they could pass as a small annoying child:wah:. We have moles, rats (yes in suburbia), mice, racoons, squirrels and occasionally the great horned owl (which I love) he takes care of the aforementioned.:wah:

If you two visit Philadelphia..stay at the Embassy Suites and visit Geno's Steaks or Pat's Steaks. Now, the trick is to say it quick...cheesesteak with wiz your choice of cheese. Do not order it wiz (Cheese wiz), totally disgusting. Would love to take you two on the Ride the Ducks (summer only) and to downtown Philly. Oscar would love it and so would you. And the friendliest peeps this side of America. Yeah, we have our quirks, but this is a really cool town.:wah: A hedgehog for you.

Attached files

qsducks · Post by **qsducks** » Sun Mar 08, 2009 10:05 pm

Peter Lake;1154186 wrote: She actually loves America and wanted to go to Georgia very much this year. I don't know what my health will be like a few months from now but she could still go and take a pal. She'd love to meet up with you and i bet you'd get on well.

We get all the above except the racoons. Are they the smelly one's?

Oscar is a blast and has the funniest sense of humor. I hope you will be feeling better. As for Georgia, that is a couple of states down from me. Pennylvania but still on the east coast. Like a 10 hr drive:wah:. She can't get those cheesesteaks there, they are strictly Philly here. Yeah, they have the fake ones everywhere (everyone always tries to duplicate it, with no luck). As for the raccoons, no they are just nosy and get into everything. Your thinking skunks. the first sure sign of spring around this way.:wah:

qsducks · Post by **qsducks** » Sun Mar 08, 2009 10:12 pm

Yawning here. I will be back with force tomorrow morning. So catch all of you foxes & hedgehogs tomorrow. Nighty night.

Post by **Peter Lake** » Sun Mar 08, 2009 10:23 pm

qsducks;1154193 wrote: Yawning here. I will be back with force tomorrow morning. So catch all of you foxes & hedgehogs tomorrow. Nighty night. Off for some rest myself. Talk again soon. Pete.

qsducks · Post by **qsducks** » Mon Mar 09, 2009 5:27 am

Peter Lake;1154197 wrote: Off for some rest myself. Talk again soon. Pete.

Morning hedgehogs, raccoons, skunks, squirrels, etc. Hahahaha, my trash has been collected but there were holes in the bags so I know you little critters invaded.

Post by **Oscar Namechange** » Mon Mar 09, 2009 12:24 pm

qsducks;1154248 wrote: Morning hedgehogs, raccoons, skunks, squirrels, etc. Hahahaha, my trash has been collected but there were holes in the bags so I know you little critters invaded. Good Morning American critters :wah: I was thinking Ducks..... over the years this country has seen all sorts of foriegn animals breeding here due to warmer winters. We even have wallaby's and American Harris Hawks breeding in the country side. It'll only be a matter of time before those Raccoons and Skunks hop across the Atlantic and start breeding here. Then I'll be feeding them myself :wah: I sent Pete out to the foxes last night..... they wouldn't go near him :wah: Me... they come right up to me. It must be the smell :wah::wah:

Nomad · Post by **Nomad** » Mon Mar 09, 2009 11:30 pm

I got the magazine about 'man has ears ripped off by dog' for you

I wish someone would do that for me.

Post by **Oscar Namechange** » Tue Mar 10, 2009 4:58 am

Nomad;1154975 wrote: I got the magazine about 'man has ears ripped off by dog' for you

I wish someone would do that for me. What? get you the magazine or rip your ears off?

qsducks · Post by **qsducks** » Tue Mar 10, 2009 5:23 am

oscar;1155058 wrote: What? get you the magazine or rip your ears off?

both:wah:

Post by **Oscar Namechange** » Tue Mar 10, 2009 5:44 am

qsducks;1155077 wrote: both:wah: Nomie hasn't got any ears.....he's an alien :yh_rotfl

qsducks · Post by **qsducks** » Tue Mar 10, 2009 5:47 am

oscar;1155084 wrote: Nomie hasn't got any ears.....he's an alien :yh_rotfl

If he has any other protruding parts the dog could easily rip them off:wah:

Post by **Oscar Namechange** » Tue Mar 10, 2009 5:53 am

qsducks;1155085 wrote: If he has any other protruding parts the dog could easily rip them off:wah: No, he hasn't got any dangly bits at all :yh_rotfl

qsducks · Post by **qsducks** » Tue Mar 10, 2009 5:54 am

oscar;1155089 wrote: No, he hasn't got any dangly bits at all :yh_rotfl

:yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl