(((Michael jackson jokes if you think they may offend please steer clear)))

dubs · Post by **dubs** » Sat Jun 27, 2009 6:12 pm

Rapunzel;1210523 wrote: You men just have no idea of how us girls rate sexiness.

Now, Gordon Brown is sexy is a one-eyed, dour, miserable, Scottish type way.

I'd replace the word sexy with strong, but otherwise yeah okay. :wah:

Mick Jagger is sexy is a liptabulous type way.

Old rubberlips? Gross. :p

Nicholas Cage is sexy in a psychotic nutjob type way.

OMG...those eyes. This guy is sex on legs! Yummmmmm. :-4:-4

Fabio Capella is sexy in an Italian pasta type way.

Ew. Ew. Ew. Yuck. He looks like an older and uglier Tom Jones. :p

Your sexy in a face caught fire, put out with a shovel type way.

I don't know what you look like Dubsy, but with Oscars taste I'd say you've got a 50/50 chance of either looking sexy or looking like Quasimodo.

:wah::wah: :rolleyes:

Yeah I know what you're saying, with Oscars taste it's looking pretty bad for me.....When I was born they reckon the midwife slapped my mother! :-2

Odie · Post by **Odie** » Sat Jun 27, 2009 7:22 pm

farmer giles;1210508 wrote: from black

to white

to brown

he really was a colourful performer

nvalleyvee · Post by **nvalleyvee** » Sat Jun 27, 2009 7:48 pm

He was so good looking in 1983. Michael was a hot and Vocal entity. He influenced sooo many genre's.

nvalleyvee · Post by **nvalleyvee** » Sat Jun 27, 2009 7:50 pm

I really can't joke About him.

farmer giles · Post by **farmer giles** » Sun Jun 28, 2009 12:37 am

nvalleyvee;1210550 wrote: I really can't joke About him.

well this is the mj joke thread

maybe i should pop over to your i love whacko jacko thread start posting mj jokes and just to cheer all you freak fans up say i really cant say anything nice about him :rolleyes::rolleyes:

abbey · Post by **abbey** » Sun Jun 28, 2009 1:26 am

Police wanted to talk with the Doctor at MJ'S bedside

but by the time the Police showed up his mother had come to pick him up and take him home.

abbey · Post by **abbey** » Sun Jun 28, 2009 1:37 am

For sale on ebay

Attached files

farmer giles · Post by **farmer giles** » Sun Jun 28, 2009 1:46 am

abbey;1210587 wrote: For sale on ebay

very funny abs :yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl

has been on toast :yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl

abbey · Post by **abbey** » Sun Jun 28, 2009 2:19 am

Just trying to get the thread back on track.

There's always someone that's got to be there and wanna be startin somethin

farmer giles · Post by **farmer giles** » Sun Jun 28, 2009 2:28 am

abbey;1210593 wrote: Just trying to get the thread back on track.

There's always someone that's got to be there and wanna be startin somethin

yup they should beat it

as a mod i would like you to notice that the boogie people would not leave our kidding alone ......... a bit like michael jackson really which is why this thread started in the first place :rolleyes::rolleyes:

really though this thread shows who is capable of leaving folks alone on their threads and who is not ,not one pedo hater has gone a mj thread and been disrespectful to other members .... shame on some of you guys

hoppy · Post by **hoppy** » Sun Jun 28, 2009 6:17 am

NEWSFLASH! THIS JUST IN. Michael Jackson still dead.

farmer giles · Post by **farmer giles** » Sun Jun 28, 2009 6:24 am

hoppy;1210629 wrote: NEWSFLASH! THIS JUST IN. Michael Jackson still dead.
:yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl

i dont know why but that really made me chuckle

tracy829 · Post by **tracy829** » Sun Jun 28, 2009 8:29 am

abbey;1210587 wrote: For sale on ebay

:yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl

farmer giles · Post by **farmer giles** » Sun Jun 28, 2009 8:30 am

chris rock sums it up for me

contains some swear words be warned :yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl

YouTube - Chris Rock says Michael Jackson is a pedo

tracy829 · Post by **tracy829** » Sun Jun 28, 2009 8:35 am

farmer giles;1210664 wrote: chris rock sums it up for me

contains some swear words be warned :yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl

YouTube - Chris Rock says Michael Jackson is a pedo

:wah: Everything he said is so true!

tracy829 · Post by **tracy829** » Sun Jun 28, 2009 8:50 am

I think some of the non-believers should read this......

"With Los Angeles Police Department detectives weighing his claims, Chandler gave them a roadmap to Jackson's below-the-waist geography, which, he said, includes distinctive "splotches" on his buttocks and one on his penis, "which is a light color similar to the color of his face." The boy's information was so precise, he even pinpointed where the splotch fell while Jackson's penis was erect, the length of the performer's pubic hair, and that he was circumcised."

It wasn't long after law enforcement's photo session that Jackson agreed to settle Chandler's civil claim for north of $20 million.

Full story here....Daily Kos: State of the Nation.

farmer giles · Post by **farmer giles** » Sun Jun 28, 2009 8:55 am

tracy829;1210672 wrote: I think some of the non-believers should read this......

"With Los Angeles Police Department detectives weighing his claims, Chandler gave them a roadmap to Jackson's below-the-waist geography, which, he said, includes distinctive "splotches" on his buttocks and one on his penis, "which is a light color similar to the color of his face." The boy's information was so precise, he even pinpointed where the splotch fell while Jackson's penis was erect, the length of the performer's pubic hair, and that he was circumcised."

It wasn't long after law enforcement's photo session that Jackson agreed to settle Chandler's civil claim for north of $20 million.

Full story here....Daily Kos: State of the Nation.

there is not a shadow of doubt in my mind

read it all before you come back bleating about conviction and jury ,all the jury said they thought he was guilty of pedo crimes

like if you catch someone vandalizing something they might not get found guilty but you know they did it :rolleyes::rolleyes:

Bruv · Post by **Bruv** » Sun Jun 28, 2009 12:00 pm

It's alleged that MJ spent a night of passion with Victoria Beckam.

Jackson denies the allegation claiming he was in Brooklyn at the time.

What's does whisky and MJ have in common?

They both come in tots.

farmer giles · Post by **farmer giles** » Sun Jun 28, 2009 12:04 pm

Bruv;1210754 wrote: It's alleged that MJ spent a night of passion with Victoria Beckam.

Jackson denies the allegation claiming he was in Brooklyn at the time.

What's does whisky and MJ have in common?

They both come in tots.

oh boy the thought of dubs son coming round eh

well you have redeemed yourself just as i was thinking you waz a double agent trouble make

;)

Post by **Oscar Namechange** » Sun Jun 28, 2009 12:06 pm

Bruv;1210754 wrote: It's alleged that MJ spent a night of passion with Victoria Beckam.

Jackson denies the allegation claiming he was in Brooklyn at the time.

What's does whisky and MJ have in common?

They both come in tots.
That is absloutely disgusting and you should be infracted.

:sneaky:

farmer giles · Post by **farmer giles** » Sun Jun 28, 2009 12:10 pm

there you go Mrs richards is on your acse now :wah::wah::rolleyes::rolleyes:

tracy829 · Post by **tracy829** » Sun Jun 28, 2009 12:10 pm

oscar;1210757 wrote: That is absloutely disgusting and you should be infracted.

:sneaky:

No they shouldnt be infracted , AGAIN read the thread title.:-5

farmer giles · Post by **farmer giles** » Sun Jun 28, 2009 12:13 pm

tracy829;1210761 wrote: No it shouldnt, AGAIN read the thread title.:-5

mrs richards

cares not for thread titles

but of course she soon would if someone posted on the mj thread in an unpleasant way :rolleyes::rolleyes:

which none of us anti peeds have i hasten to add;)

Post by **Oscar Namechange** » Sun Jun 28, 2009 12:13 pm

tracy829;1210761 wrote: No they shouldnt be infracted , AGAIN read the thread title.:-5

It's shocking the jokes posted on here and frankly, i expect better from Bruv.

Post by **Oscar Namechange** » Sun Jun 28, 2009 12:33 pm

tracy829;1210761 wrote: No they shouldnt be infracted , AGAIN read the thread title.:-5
I do apologise for making you angry. i should explain that i am almost blind after my gas cooker exploded in 1996 and i was hit in the face with a joint roast. Surgeons tried to save my eyes but they were damaged beyond repair. I have to have a 52 inch screen for my moniter and my keyboard comes from a special disabilty charity that has extra large letters to help me type. Very often, i can not read the title of a thread properly and have to guess at most of the content. I do use a magnifyer as well but i do get it wrong many times. Please do not think badly of me. It was a terrible day in my life that the pork roast blew up. I was left with no other choice but to call for a take-out delivery.

farmer giles · Post by **farmer giles** » Sun Jun 28, 2009 12:35 pm

oscar;1210780 wrote: I do apologise for making you angry. i should explain that i am almost blind after my gas cooker exploded in 1996 and i was hit in the face with a joint roast. Surgeons tried to save my eyes but they were damaged beyond repair. I have to have a 52 inch screen for my moniter and my keyboard comes from a special disabilty charity that has extra large letters to help me type. Very often, i can not read the title of a thread properly and have to guess at most of the content. I do use a magnifyer as well but i do get it wrong many times. Please do not think badly of me. It was a terrible day in my life that the pork roast blew up. I was left with no other choice but to call for a take-out delivery.

good grief

abbey · Post by **abbey** » Sun Jun 28, 2009 1:33 pm

oscar;1210780 wrote: I do apologise for making you angry. i should explain that i am almost blind after my gas cooker exploded in 1996 and i was hit in the face with a joint roast. Surgeons tried to save my eyes but they were damaged beyond repair. I have to have a 52 inch screen for my moniter and my keyboard comes from a special disabilty charity that has extra large letters to help me type. Very often, i can not read the title of a thread properly and have to guess at most of the content. I do use a magnifyer as well but i do get it wrong many times. Please do not think badly of me. It was a terrible day in my life that the pork roast blew up. I was left with no other choice but to call for a take-out delivery.I would have thought with a 52" screen you'd have seen the thread title. :rolleyes:

abbey · Post by **abbey** » Sun Jun 28, 2009 1:38 pm

I have now changed the title so there can be no mix-up.

Bruv · Post by **Bruv** » Sun Jun 28, 2009 2:04 pm

oscar;1210766 wrote: It's shocking the jokes posted on here and frankly, i expect better from Bruv.

You don't like the quality of my Jokes ?

You better make your own up then.........................

Bruv · Post by **Bruv** » Sun Jun 28, 2009 2:07 pm

oscar;1210780 wrote: I have to have a 52 inch screen for my moniter and my keyboard comes from a special disabilty charity that has extra large letters to help me type. Very often, i can not read the title of a thread properly and have to guess at most of the content. .

You can get audio utilities .....it types while you talk and even reads the script off a page.

Mind you.......it would need to be state of the art to keep up with you.

Only trying to help................

abbey · Post by **abbey** » Sun Jun 28, 2009 2:24 pm

Bruv;1210851 wrote: You can get audio utilities .....it types while you talk and even reads the script off a page.

Mind you.......it would need to be state of the art to keep up with you.

Only trying to help................I have that on my laptop and it reads so slow it drives me bonkers!

Post by **Oscar Namechange** » Sun Jun 28, 2009 2:42 pm

Bruv;1210849 wrote: You don't like the quality of my Jokes ?

You better make your own up then......................... :yh_rotfl :sneaky::sneaky:

Barman · Post by **Barman** » Sun Jun 28, 2009 3:08 pm

Michael Jackson's death sparks bus brawl - Yahoo! News

FFS a knife fight, people actually trying to kill each other over the death of that freak. God help us.

farmer giles · Post by **farmer giles** » Sun Jun 28, 2009 3:13 pm

Barman;1210865 wrote: Michael Jackson's death sparks bus brawl - Yahoo! News

FFS a knife fight, people actually trying to kill each other over the death of that freak. God help us.

but that is the mentality of the freaks they will not listen to reason

i mean one of them even said to kathy ellen that she hopes she crashed her car,and said to some nice bald guy on face book that she hoped he died in a car crash and got run over , i do believe the poor gentle soul was most upset :sneaky::sneaky:

abbey · Post by **abbey** » Sun Jun 28, 2009 3:20 pm

I can understand peoples affinity with a singer they grew up with.

I dont feel any emotion for MJs death... Guess he never really touched me when I was younger

farmer giles · Post by **farmer giles** » Sun Jun 28, 2009 3:22 pm

abbey;1210876 wrote: I can understand peoples affinity with a singer they grew up with.

I dont feel any emotion for MJs death... Guess he never really touched me when I was younger

i get very upset about the boxer ali when i see him on tv finding it hard to talk

Odie · Post by **Odie** » Sun Jun 28, 2009 3:24 pm

actually getting really really really sick of hearing about him!:-5:-5

its been 4 days!:-5:-5

t-shirts being sold on the streets today!

someone's making big bucks.

Barman · Post by **Barman** » Sun Jun 28, 2009 3:26 pm

Odie;1210882 wrote: actually getting really really really sick of hearing about him!:-5:-5

its been 4 days!:-5:-5

t-shirts being sold on the streets today!

someone's making big bucks.

Blimey, t-shirts have been out for years and years, where have you been?:D

farmer giles · Post by **farmer giles** » Sun Jun 28, 2009 3:26 pm

Odie;1210882 wrote: actually getting really really really sick of hearing about him!:-5:-5

its been 4 days!:-5:-5

t-shirts being sold on the streets today!

someone's making big bucks.

get used to it i turn off the news ,all it is mj ,the radio is all man in the mirror

and we have not even had the funeral yet:rolleyes:

farmer giles · Post by **farmer giles** » Sun Jun 28, 2009 3:28 pm

Barman;1210885 wrote: Blimey, t-shirts have been out for years and years, where have you been?:D

i was going to say where they being sold mothercare but i wont :-3:-3

Barman · Post by **Barman** » Sun Jun 28, 2009 3:28 pm

farmer giles;1210886 wrote: get used to it i turn off the news ,all it is mj ,the radio is all man in the mirror

and we have not even had the funeral yet:rolleyes:

Funeral, what funeral, you mean he really is dead.

Odie · Post by **Odie** » Sun Jun 28, 2009 3:30 pm

farmer giles;1210886 wrote: get used to it i turn off the news ,all it is mj ,the radio is all man in the mirror

and we have not even had the funeral yet:rolleyes:

tried 4 radio stations while driving, guess what was on them?:-5:-5

thank god for CD'S!:yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl

Barman · Post by **Barman** » Sun Jun 28, 2009 3:34 pm

Odie;1210891 wrote: tried 4 radio stations while driving, guess what was on them?:-5:-5

thank god for CD'S!:yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl

Well, waitin.......... what was on them for heaven's sake, i wont be able to sleep tonight for thinking about what was on them.:wah:

Odie · Post by **Odie** » Sun Jun 28, 2009 3:38 pm

Barman;1210899 wrote: Well, waitin.......... what was on them for heaven's sake, i wont be able to sleep tonight for thinking about what was on them.:wah:

:yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl

4disc:

The Police

Rod Stewart........a must have at all times.:guitarist

Meatloaf

Queen

farmer giles · Post by **farmer giles** » Sun Jun 28, 2009 3:39 pm

Odie;1210904 wrote: :yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl

4disc:

The Police

Rod Stewart........a must have at all times.:guitarist

Meatloaf

Queen

you are trying to goad me into freddy jokes and its not working :yh_rotfl

Barman · Post by **Barman** » Sun Jun 28, 2009 3:40 pm

Odie;1210904 wrote: :yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl

4disc:

The Police

Rod Stewart........a must have at all times.:guitarist

Meatloaf

Queen

Thank-you, hell you make me suffer at times.

Odie · Post by **Odie** » Sun Jun 28, 2009 3:41 pm

Barman;1210908 wrote: Thank-you, hell you make me suffer at times.

I'm sorry, I will try harder next time.....I'm only a woman!:yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl

Barman · Post by **Barman** » Sun Jun 28, 2009 3:44 pm

Odie;1210909 wrote: I'm sorry, I will try harder next time.....I'm only a woman!:yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl

A woman......... really......... bugger, i thought i had made contact with a rabbit, guess i am just a stupid old man after all.

Odie · Post by **Odie** » Sun Jun 28, 2009 3:45 pm

Barman;1210912 wrote: A woman......... really......... bugger, i thought i had made contact with a rabbit, guess i am just a stupid old man after all.

you mean a wrabbit?:yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl

bougt time you came back to the good side!:guitarist:guitarist

Barman · Post by **Barman** » Sun Jun 28, 2009 3:48 pm

Odie;1210913 wrote: you mean a wrabbit?:yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl

bougt time you came back to the good side!:guitarist:guitarist

Cant, computer crashed and now i cant find it for the life of me.:wah: