Rules for dating daughters

hoppy · Post by **hoppy** » Sat Aug 15, 2009 6:21 am

1. If you pull into the driveway and honk you better be delivering something because you're sure not picking anything up.

2. Do not touch my daughter in front if me. If I see your hand below her neck I will remove it.

3. I realize that now they teach you when having s-e-x to use a "barrier" or "protection". I am the barrier and I will kill you.

4. I know you probably feel obligated to engage in smalltalk with me regarding football, the weather, etc. Please do not do this. All I

need to know is what time you're bringing my daughter home and the acceptable answer is "early".

5. I have no doubt you are a popular fellow, with many opportunities to date other girls. This is fine with me as long as it is okay with my daughter. Otherwise, once you have gone out with my little girl, you will continue to date no one but her until she is finished with you. If you make her cry, I will make YOU cry.

6. Just remember - I have no problem going back to prison.

Odie · Post by **Odie** » Sat Aug 15, 2009 6:23 am

excellent!

along-for-the-ride · Post by **along-for-the-ride** » Sat Aug 15, 2009 6:41 am

Here's one for ya, hoppy.

YouTube - Rodney Atkins---Cleaning this Gun (Come on in Boy)

Peg · Post by **Peg** » Sat Aug 15, 2009 6:44 am

hoppy;1230369 wrote: 1. If you pull into the driveway and honk you better be delivering something because you're sure not picking anything up.

2. Do not touch my daughter in front if me. If I see your hand below her neck I will remove it.

3. I realize that now they teach you when having s-e-x to use a "barrier" or "protection". I am the barrier and I will kill you.

4. I know you probably feel obligated to engage in smalltalk with me regarding football, the weather, etc. Please do not do this. All I

need to know is what time you're bringing my daughter home and the acceptable answer is "early".

5. I have no doubt you are a popular fellow, with many opportunities to date other girls. This is fine with me as long as it is okay with my daughter. Otherwise, once you have gone out with my little girl, you will continue to date no one but her until she is finished with you. If you make her cry, I will make YOU cry.

6. Just remember - I have no problem going back to prison.

I'll have to print this out and hand it to any guys my daughter dates. My typical line is, "You do know what happened to the last guy that hurt her, don't you? Just remember, there is room for one more body in the back yard." :yh_rotfl My daughter then turns 10 shades of red. :yh_rotfl

Peg · Post by **Peg** » Sat Aug 15, 2009 6:49 am

along-for-the-ride;1230380 wrote: Here's one for ya, hoppy.

YouTube - Rodney Atkins---Cleaning this Gun (Come on in Boy)

LOL That was great!

hoppy · Post by **hoppy** » Sat Aug 15, 2009 7:06 am

along-for-the-ride;1230380 wrote: Here's one for ya, hoppy.

YouTube - Rodney Atkins---Cleaning this Gun (Come on in Boy)

Yeah, memories. I got two daughters. The first one dated a kid who mentioned he was a duck hunter. I started showing him some of my guns. Later he told people he was afraid not to marry her, ya oughta see all the hardware her dad's got.

lou lou belle · Post by **lou lou belle** » Sat Aug 15, 2009 7:35 am

I have two other sisters so my poor dad had quite a few guys hanging around us when we were dating. Luckily i didnt bring many guys back that worried him.

He did however see me once on the back of a motorbike and the guy was riding a little too fast for my dads liking. He waited for me to get back and gave him a mouthful. As you can imagine i was embarrassed that he had confronted him, but secretly pleased that he was protecting me. He still worries about us now.

If i stay with my parents and go out with my friends, he will still run me into town and pick's me up. How lovely is that?

ronald · Post by **ronald** » Tue Aug 18, 2009 11:09 pm

I fully agree with your views.

Bill Sikes · Post by **Bill Sikes** » Wed Aug 19, 2009 12:24 am

ronald;1231969 wrote: I fully agree with your views.

Thank *goodness* I haven't seen your "sig", else I might wonder about your motives.

farmer giles · Post by **farmer giles** » Wed Aug 19, 2009 1:11 am

hoppy;1230369 wrote: 1. If you pull into the driveway and honk you better be delivering something because you're sure not picking anything up.

2. Do not touch my daughter in front if me. If I see your hand below her neck I will remove it.

3. I realize that now they teach you when having s-e-x to use a "barrier" or "protection". I am the barrier and I will kill you.

4. I know you probably feel obligated to engage in smalltalk with me regarding football, the weather, etc. Please do not do this. All I

need to know is what time you're bringing my daughter home and the acceptable answer is "early".

5. I have no doubt you are a popular fellow, with many opportunities to date other girls. This is fine with me as long as it is okay with my daughter. Otherwise, once you have gone out with my little girl, you will continue to date no one but her until she is finished with you. If you make her cry, I will make YOU cry.

6. Just remember - I have no problem going back to prison.

fantastic :yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl

mikeinie · Post by **mikeinie** » Wed Aug 19, 2009 2:32 am

This reminds me of a funny story (and a true one.)

A friend of mine’s daughter was just starting her first year in high school, a few weeks into the term there was a knock on the door one evening, and there was a much older student (final year) at the door to pick up his daughter. Well the guy was chased down the street and had to run for his life.

It turned out however, that the daughter had signed up for the student council and the guy at the door was the president of the student council, who had offered to walk her to the first council meeting.

The poor girl was so embarrassed, but my friend said that the point was made and the standard was set, so he was OK with it. However, he had to laugh at the way the poor guy legged it up the road.