My husband does not share my passion for horse-racing and over the years he has feigned Interest In a half-hearted attempt when I have been praising the virtues of one of my favourite horses battling for the line.
On some rare occasions watching on tv, he will ask me what the heck the commentator Is talking about when they use racing terminology.
He was going to town so I asked him to collect my winnings from the Betting Office.
At the counter, the Clerk told him he could not pay him out on that ticket.
All the racing talk I have uttered over the years sprang to his mind and he was very proud to assert:
'I think you will find my good man that because the 3rd horse was with-drawn not under orders, the tri-cast reverts to a dual Fore-cast and that Is Indeed a winning ticket.'
He was mentally praising himself for drawing up such racing terminology and knowledge until the clerk said:
'Yes, you are correct Sir... The tri-cast does become a dual forecast due to the 3rd horse being with-drawn not under orders, but,... This Is a 'Backhouse Racing' shop and that Is a Ladbrooks betting slip'.
My husband swears he heard the word 'Tosser' mumbled as he left the shop.
Why Men are useless at times....
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Oscar Namechange
- Posts: 31840
- Joined: Wed Jul 30, 2008 9:26 am
Why Men are useless at times....
At the going down of the sun and in the morning, we will remember them. R.L. Binyon
Why Men are useless at times....
We cant get it right all the time. My wife agreed a while ago that men could multi task. "You can fart and burp at the same time "
Makes me feel very proud
Makes me feel very proud
"He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire."
Winston Churchill
Winston Churchill
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fuzzywuzzy
- Posts: 6596
- Joined: Mon Feb 02, 2009 5:35 pm
Why Men are useless at times....
Hmmm how apt is this thread. I just dropped off three 15 year old boys into the middle of a state forest for some motor bike riding.
conversation beforehand was
: "do you have mobile phones?"
"Yes mum we're not stupid safety first"
" oh okay sorry"
Get out into the bush
"Okay guys I'll meet you at this point at 5pm. Be here or I crack em!!"
I look at their wrists..........no watches
"okay who has a mobile phone?"
"Ummm mines on the blink" :-2
"I left mine at home" :-2
Breathe ...Okay I know my boy has one on him. He can at least ring 000.
Before I left the house I asked where their back packs were........no back packs!!!! so I filled one with a bottle of water, apples, and chips and chocolate.
Get this !! they were originally going to camp out there tonight!!! BWAAAHHHAAHAAHAA
Safety first eh??? Next time I'm taking a forward inventory of supplies and making sure they aren't going in the things they are wearing now ..Heavens above!!!!
They have another hour and a half of riding to go before I pick them up. I'm hoping they get cold so they learn a lesson.
Oh I should mention that I did leave them kwith a CFA map of the forest in case they got lost.
conversation beforehand was
: "do you have mobile phones?"
"Yes mum we're not stupid safety first"
" oh okay sorry"
Get out into the bush
"Okay guys I'll meet you at this point at 5pm. Be here or I crack em!!"
I look at their wrists..........no watches
"okay who has a mobile phone?"
"Ummm mines on the blink" :-2
"I left mine at home" :-2
Breathe ...Okay I know my boy has one on him. He can at least ring 000.
Before I left the house I asked where their back packs were........no back packs!!!! so I filled one with a bottle of water, apples, and chips and chocolate.
Get this !! they were originally going to camp out there tonight!!! BWAAAHHHAAHAAHAA
Safety first eh??? Next time I'm taking a forward inventory of supplies and making sure they aren't going in the things they are wearing now ..Heavens above!!!!
They have another hour and a half of riding to go before I pick them up. I'm hoping they get cold so they learn a lesson.
Oh I should mention that I did leave them kwith a CFA map of the forest in case they got lost.
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chonsigirl
- Posts: 33633
- Joined: Mon Mar 07, 2005 8:28 am
Why Men are useless at times....
Wow, you make sure they are prepared!
Why Men are useless at times....
oscar;1323653 wrote: My husband does not share my passion for horse-racing and over the years he has feigned Interest In a half-hearted attempt when I have been praising the virtues of one of my favourite horses battling for the line.
On some rare occasions watching on tv, he will ask me what the heck the commentator Is talking about when they use racing terminology.
He was going to town so I asked him to collect my winnings from the Betting Office.
At the counter, the Clerk told him he could not pay him out on that ticket.
All the racing talk I have uttered over the years sprang to his mind and he was very proud to assert:
'I think you will find my good man that because the 3rd horse was with-drawn not under orders, the tri-cast reverts to a dual Fore-cast and that Is Indeed a winning ticket.'
He was mentally praising himself for drawing up such racing terminology and knowledge until the clerk said:
'Yes, you are correct Sir... The tri-cast does become a dual forecast due to the 3rd horse being with-drawn not under orders, but,... This Is a 'Backhouse Racing' shop and that Is a Ladbrooks betting slip'.
My husband swears he heard the word 'Tosser' mumbled as he left the shop.
:yh_rotfl :yh_rotfl
Snowfire;1323687 wrote: We cant get it right all the time. My wife agreed a while ago that men could multi task. "You can fart and burp at the same time "
Makes me feel very proud
:yh_rotfl :yh_rotfl
On some rare occasions watching on tv, he will ask me what the heck the commentator Is talking about when they use racing terminology.
He was going to town so I asked him to collect my winnings from the Betting Office.
At the counter, the Clerk told him he could not pay him out on that ticket.
All the racing talk I have uttered over the years sprang to his mind and he was very proud to assert:
'I think you will find my good man that because the 3rd horse was with-drawn not under orders, the tri-cast reverts to a dual Fore-cast and that Is Indeed a winning ticket.'
He was mentally praising himself for drawing up such racing terminology and knowledge until the clerk said:
'Yes, you are correct Sir... The tri-cast does become a dual forecast due to the 3rd horse being with-drawn not under orders, but,... This Is a 'Backhouse Racing' shop and that Is a Ladbrooks betting slip'.
My husband swears he heard the word 'Tosser' mumbled as he left the shop.
:yh_rotfl :yh_rotfl
Snowfire;1323687 wrote: We cant get it right all the time. My wife agreed a while ago that men could multi task. "You can fart and burp at the same time "
Makes me feel very proud
:yh_rotfl :yh_rotfl
Why Men are useless at times....
Snowfire;1323687 wrote: We cant get it right all the time. My wife agreed a while ago that men could multi task. "You can fart and burp at the same time "
Makes me feel very proud
tis a good thing to feel proud I guess!:yh_rotfl
Makes me feel very proud
tis a good thing to feel proud I guess!:yh_rotfl
Life is just to short for drama.
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Oscar Namechange
- Posts: 31840
- Joined: Wed Jul 30, 2008 9:26 am
Why Men are useless at times....
Snowfire;1323687 wrote: We cant get it right all the time. My wife agreed a while ago that men could multi task. "You can fart and burp at the same time "
Makes me feel very proud Yes, but... Betting slips are simple. On the top In Bloody great letters It will say 'Ladbrooks', Backhouse', 'William Hill', 'Paddy Power' etc etc. This normally gives a tiny clue as to which chain of Bookmakers the bet was placed with. Infact, Bookmakers even make It even more easy to determine by each chain having different coloured slips. Backhouse have green and Ladbrooks have Pink.
Oh... and while I am here... my husband also called at a house very recently and on leaving the doorstep saw the car was not where he had parked It outside. It was actually half a mile down the road up against a tree because he forgot what the hand-brake was for.
As for burping and farting at the same time... We have none of that malarky In Oscar Towers Thank You very much.
Makes me feel very proud Yes, but... Betting slips are simple. On the top In Bloody great letters It will say 'Ladbrooks', Backhouse', 'William Hill', 'Paddy Power' etc etc. This normally gives a tiny clue as to which chain of Bookmakers the bet was placed with. Infact, Bookmakers even make It even more easy to determine by each chain having different coloured slips. Backhouse have green and Ladbrooks have Pink.
Oh... and while I am here... my husband also called at a house very recently and on leaving the doorstep saw the car was not where he had parked It outside. It was actually half a mile down the road up against a tree because he forgot what the hand-brake was for.
As for burping and farting at the same time... We have none of that malarky In Oscar Towers Thank You very much.
At the going down of the sun and in the morning, we will remember them. R.L. Binyon
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fuzzywuzzy
- Posts: 6596
- Joined: Mon Feb 02, 2009 5:35 pm
Why Men are useless at times....
chonsigirl;1323791 wrote: Wow, you make sure they are prepared!
Nah, they were fine. Picked them up and they thanked me profuselyFor leaving them to themselves.
. They took off this morning at six am in the other direction to Jack Smiths lake. They're having fun. Damien keeps saying," My mum would never let me do that" . But this is what it's like with us ...kids have fun when they come here.
Nah, they were fine. Picked them up and they thanked me profuselyFor leaving them to themselves.
. They took off this morning at six am in the other direction to Jack Smiths lake. They're having fun. Damien keeps saying," My mum would never let me do that" . But this is what it's like with us ...kids have fun when they come here.