Oral Sex

[Ahso!]

I know here in FG we can approach this subject in a mature manner. The question is simple: Why do some people do this? and for those who don't: Why not? since even those who do not engage in the activity realize its a common one, so opting out is most likely a conscious choice. Of course its not necessary to admit one's own habits and can approach the subject from an objective viewpoint. Have you every thought about the "why" regarding this subject?

From my perspective, its interesting that we like to, or attempt to (or at least simulate) consume most everything we desire or admire. What is the driving force? Is it emotional, evolutionary, dietary (kidding) or maybe a combination of...whatever?

[Scrat]

You're making it way to complicated. It feels good and it's fun, that's all you have to know.

[Ahso!]

Scrat;1343746 wrote: You're making it way to complicated. It feels good and it's fun, that's all you have to know. :)It only seems complicated because it requires reflection. Good and fun feelings are adaptations that have evolved over millions of years, at least. I'm on record someehere as saying we enjoy sex so we'll engage in it, the good and fun feeling is therefore directly associated with reproduction. but why do we want to put our mouth on the genitialia of others? It serves no purpose whatsoever AFAICT.

More to the point though is why does placing our mouth on the genitalia of others causes good and fun feelings. What causes the activity to be erotic? I say its the idea of consuming the reproductive capabilities of the opposite sex maybe.

[recovering conservative]

Ahso!;1343758 wrote: It only seems complicated because it requires reflection. Good and fun feelings are adaptations that have evolved over millions of years, at least. I'm on record someehere as saying we enjoy sex so we'll engage in it, the good and fun feeling is therefore directly associated with reproduction. but why do we want to put our mouth on the genitialia of others? It serves no purpose whatsoever AFAICT.

More to the point though is why does placing our mouth on the genitalia of others causes good and fun feelings. What causes the activity to be erotic? I say its the idea of consuming the reproductive capabilities of the opposite sex maybe.


If it works for the Bonobos, it must be good!

When I was a teenager, oral sex was just beginning to be accepted....likely because of the porn industry! Until the 70's, it was just something a prostitute did; now it's universal. But, a lot of people (besides Bill Clinton) claim that it's not really sex! Even many Christian teens are claiming that they can still call themselves virgins, even though they are engaging in oral sex. What a world!

[OpenMind]

Oral sex? That's where you hold a conversation during sex, isn't it?

[tabby]

Ahso!;1343758 wrote: More to the point though is why does placing our mouth on the genitalia of others causes good and fun feelings. What causes the activity to be erotic? I say its the idea of consuming the reproductive capabilities of the opposite sex maybe.


Some of the good and fun feelings may also be from the emotional turn-on of sexual Dominance/submission that sometimes accompanies oral sex. I think ultimately it boils down to what Scrat said ... "It feels good.".

[Scrat]

It only seems complicated because it requires reflection.


No it doesn't. Unleash your animal, if it feels good do it. Simple as that.

[Ahso!]

Scrat;1343801 wrote: No it doesn't. Unleash your animal, if it feels good do it. Simple as that.Ah, you're just feelin' your oats because you've had two people agree with you today.:wah:

[Bryn Mawr]

Ahso!;1343719 wrote: I know here in FG we can approach this subject in a mature manner. The question is simple: Why do some people do this? and for those who don't: Why not? since even those who do not engage in the activity realize its a common one, so opting out is most likely a conscious choice. Of course its not necessary to admit one's own habits and can approach the subject from an objective viewpoint. Have you every thought about the "why" regarding this subject?

From my perspective, its interesting that we like to, or attempt to (or at least simulate) consume most everything we desire or admire. What is the driving force? Is it emotional, evolutionary, dietary (kidding) or maybe a combination of...whatever?


The driving force is the giving of pleasure - if the recipient does not enjoy it you do not do it. I do not see this attempt by the giver to consume the receiver.

[along-for-the-ride]

Oral sex is an acquired taste.





;)

[Ahso!]

Bryn Mawr;1343830 wrote: The driving force is the giving of pleasure - if the recipient does not enjoy it you do not do it. I do not see this attempt by the giver to consume the receiver.Then the pleasure would not be any greater than could be achieved with other instruments or methods.

Heres an interesting observation. In restaurant men's rooms the majority wash their hands after touching their own penis, yet they are fine with the idea of having the person they most cherish put their mouth on it. And you can't use the excuse that the receiver makes sure its clean before hand because my guess is that much of the oral sex is spontaneous, like say, the car ride home after the meal.

[littleCJelkton]

I see it as developing from human thought process; Humans wanted to satisfy their sexual desires yet not adding to overpopulation, so when a couple wants to have sexual relations but not worry at all about having a child, unlike anal oral pleasures both a male and/or a female, so Oral was adopted to be the contraceptive sexual act of choice.

[Ahso!]

littleCJelkton;1343855 wrote: I see it as developing from human thought process; Humans wanted to satisfy their sexual desires yet not adding to overpopulation, so when a couple wants to have sexual relations but not worry at all about having a child, unlike anal oral pleasures both a male and/or a female, so Oral was adopted to be the contraceptive sexual act of choice.Thats interesting, CJ, but again, why not then just employ the use of something other than the mouth and tongue. In medical facilities everyone is ultra cautious about disinfecting everything they touch, however, those same people will place their face in the bare crotch of another person without much care or thought at all. Of course thats because there is an overwhelming desire to do so. The question is: where did that desire come from? Why do we have it?

[K.Snyder]

Ahso!;1343758 wrote: It only seems complicated because it requires reflection. Good and fun feelings are adaptations that have evolved over millions of years, at least. I'm on record someehere as saying we enjoy sex so we'll engage in it, the good and fun feeling is therefore directly associated with reproduction. but why do we want to put our mouth on the genitialia of others? It serves no purpose whatsoever AFAICT.

More to the point though is why does placing our mouth on the genitalia of others causes good and fun feelings. What causes the activity to be erotic? I say its the idea of consuming the reproductive capabilities of the opposite sex maybe.


Because it's sexual...I don't see anyone asking why people like to sit and enjoy an orgasmic dinner with (In my case a Lovely Woman) another... Because it's just as sexual as oral sex or, missionary, anal etc etc

It's the same thing, the difference is at what level one cuts off heir ability to be stimulated by those they're "attracted" to.

I ask this, how in the World is oral sex different than simply being in the accompaniment of a Lovely Woman(Or man)? How is that exactly?

[littleCJelkton]

Ahso!;1343858 wrote: Thats interesting, CJ, but again, why not then just employ the use of something other than the mouth and tongue. In medical facilities everyone is ultra cautious about disinfecting everything they touch, however, those same people will place their face in the bare crotch of another person without much care or thought at all. Of course thats because there is an overwhelming desire to do so. The question is: where did that desire come from? Why do we have it?


People do employ other things as well; having the other person masterbate for you, or the use a sex toy (dildo, strocker) on you.

[fuzzywuzzy]

Ummmm .......cause my arse and vagina does not posess a tongue.



I have no idea what a 'strocker' is.



It's a good question though because I hate sex toys. To me they're insensitive, and impersonal. But sex is about enveloping another human being (to me anyway) by any possible means and in an intimate way. Oral sex is just another form of achieving this, but still, it's like asking why a man wants to put his penis between a womans breasts.

I do remember a friend of mine (a long time ago) that said she'd never ever swallow because it would be like eating her future children.

Another reason of cause is the excuse given by men that the performance of oral sex on them is a favour to women because sperm is good for the skin/complexion and is full of protien so it's healthy for you .................that's true isn't it????? :yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl

[LarsMac]

I certainly don't get what some other folks really like, but I know what I like. And I like it.

I saw a bumper sticker once that seems appropriate here.

It said:

If I have to explain it, you wouldn't understand.

[Ahso!]

LarsMac;1343954 wrote: I certainly don't get what some other folks really like, but I know what I like. And I like it.

I saw a bumper sticker once that seems appropriate here.

It said:The inquiry is not whether or not its liked, the obvios answer to that question is a resounding yes from most people. The question is: why did this "like" evolve? If everything happens for a reason (or due to a reason), what then is the reason? We don't do things for or with no purpose attached to it, IMV. Perhaps you disagree with that?

[Bryn Mawr]

Ahso!;1343962 wrote: The inquiry is not whether or not its liked, the obvios answer to that question is a resounding yes from most people. The question is: why did this "like" evolve? If everything happens for a reason (or due to a reason), what then is the reason? We don't do things for or with no purpose attached to it, IMV. Perhaps you disagree with that?


It is fairly plain why the pleasure of sex evolved, I'll take that as a given.

Given that the orgasm exists to reward reproductive efforts, anything that triggers that reward will be selected for - maybe not as positively as potentially reproductive sex but positively.

Add to that the social restrictions that "civilised" humans place on the reproductive act and any alternative that is positively reinforced will be selected for.

So I think the answer to your question lies in the existence of chaperones and the stigma attached to pregnancy out of wedlock.

[Ahso!]

Bryn Mawr;1343967 wrote: It is fairly plain why the pleasure of sex evolved, I'll take that as a given.

Given that the orgasm exists to reward reproductive efforts, anything that triggers that reward will be selected for - maybe not as positively as potentially reproductive sex but positively.

Add to that the social restrictions that "civilised" humans place on the reproductive act and any alternative that is positively reinforced will be selected for.

So I think the answer to your question lies in the existence of chaperones and the stigma attached to pregnancy out of wedlock.Thats an intriguing post, Bryn, thank you for it.

Any thoughts on why the mouth must play a role really from both perspectives, because I have the belief that in most cases both the giver and receiver are equally stimulated by the act.

Consumption is the ultimate act of acceptance I think, in fact, isn't intercourse an act by the female of consuming her lover's body part first and ultimately then the acceptance of the bodily fluid? I've read that just the though of that by the male is what causes climax, even premature ejaculation.

[K.Snyder]

Ahso!;1343970 wrote: Any thoughts on why the mouth must play a role really from both perspectives, because I have the belief that in most cases both the giver and receiver are equally stimulated by the act.


The mouth is irrelevant. The thought of stimulating your partner is enough to satisfy the giver. Some, I've no doubt, are just as keen to use their feet so long as they're not labeled selfish

[Ahso!]

The mouth, like the vagina, represents consumption, and ultimately, means acceptance

[Bryn Mawr]

Ahso!;1343970 wrote: Thats an intriguing post, Bryn, thank you for it.

Any thoughts on why the mouth must play a role really from both perspectives, because I have the belief that in most cases both the giver and receiver are equally stimulated by the act.

Consumption is the ultimate act of acceptance I think, in fact, isn't intercourse an act by the female of consuming her lover's body part first and ultimately then the acceptance of the bodily fluid? I've read that just the though of that by the male is what causes climax, even premature ejaculation.


The lack of complete weaning?

Any appendage that is sensitive enough and delicate enough can be used - which one is in any given situation is a matter of personal preference.

[koan]

I decided that it's a good idea if I'm dealing with a mouthful before it goes any farther. :p

Sorry.

[Scrat]

But sex is about enveloping another human being (to me anyway) by any possible means and in an intimate way. Oral sex is just another form of achieving this


I agree with this. I think with me I don't like to think of sex in a serious, mature manner. That's not what sex is for IMO. Sex is about the animal side and the peace afterward, and the fun getting there.

[LarsMac]

Ahso!;1343962 wrote: The inquiry is not whether or not its liked, the obvios answer to that question is a resounding yes from most people. The question is: why did this "like" evolve? If everything happens for a reason (or due to a reason), what then is the reason? We don't do things for or with no purpose attached to it, IMV. Perhaps you disagree with that?


Sorry. Your OP was not particularly clear that you only wanted a clinical discussion.

Fact is, pleasure has evolved as its own reward.

Mammals basically take pleasure out of many behavior patterns, and sharing pleasure is key to the mating rituals, which tend to produce offspring.

Parental stabiity among many of the mammal species who mate for life has proved to be a positive influence upon offspring being successful, and giving and receiving pleasure is an enhancement to the extended relationship, ensuring said parental stability.



So, as I said, pleasure is its own reward.

[Scrat]

You can add to that a little history of the why we hominids have sex the way we do. We think that the sex lives of our ancestors changed radically when Homo Erectus came along. Up until then hominid females came into heat seasonally, sex was only possible/desirable during that time.The family groups we lived in at the time had a small problem with this, the males apparently roamed. This was not good for the rearing of young as the work was much harder. Females seem to have evolved to be able to have sex at just about any time for one reason, to attract and keep males around and interested. The reason males hung around more often was because of the pleasure factor. This of course led to other problems of which we all know about even to this day.

[koan]

I thought my answer was rather clinical. I only apologized for the bluntness of it, not because it was a joke.

There are other reasons of course. Mostly, I've found that it gives a sense of control. Aside from the greater control over the muscles of one's mouth in comparison to the muscles of one's groin, it is considered a source of power to give someone an orgasm. Orgasm creates at least a small moment of complete loss of control by the person receiving it and that control is transfered, by default, to the person giving it.

[Ahso!]

Some say the surrender necessary for an orgasm is as close to the act of dying we can achieve without actually doing so, thus the erotica. The giver certainly gains confidence as a lover, and the bond between lovers is strengthened by it, I think.

[Ahso!]

Scrat;1344126 wrote: I agree with this. I think with me I don't like to think of sex in a serious, mature manner. That's not what sex is for IMO. Sex is about the animal side and the peace afterward, and the fun getting there.Maybe you're right here, specifically going back to those four-footed times. Four footed animals lick to display affection.

[OpenMind]

Either you talk about it or you suck on it.

[Scrat]

Maybe you're right here, specifically going back to those four-footed times. Four footed animals lick to display affection.


We do many things to display affection by touching. Don't forget, we're animals too. Oral sex is if you think about it just another form of grooming. We kiss, we caress, flirt and cuddle. It's all just variations on the same theme. Anyone who has ever studied apes in the wild tell you we have very similar behaviors and I think (even though most people will deny it to their grave) we are one of the great apes just different in ways.