Help me to understand

High Threshold · Post by **High Threshold** » Tue Jan 13, 2015 6:45 am

There's this guy in town. He's maybe late 20's or early 30's now. For years he's been hanging about the railway station and a couple of the bus exchanges. He doesn't say anything to anyone except for the bus chauffeur, with a false, high-pitched matter of fact voice you-know-me “hello! He first started out with two tennis-ball sized lumps under his jumper to give the impression that he had women's breasts. Every year or two he increases the size. He had American soft-ball sized things a couple of years ¦... but now in the year of our Lord 2015 he's got basketballs under his jumper! No joke! With those things, his arms can no longer dangle at his sides and he elbows today are nearly at a 45 degree angle from his torso, making his arms damned near parallel with the surface of the earth! He does turn his elbows in with his hands pointing straight forward (more or less) otherwise he'd look like our dear Jesus on the cross. I'd snap a quick photo of him and post it here but that might be too cruel.

So who is this guy? What happened in his life to bring this about? He clearly wants attention but everyone keeps a very wide birth so there's almost no eye contact. But OK. What then is the cure? Attention? Don't think so. Does he want people to talk with him about his “tits or does he crave contact and chat about anything else DESPITE the bulges?

Post by **Oscar Namechange** » Tue Jan 13, 2015 8:38 am

The key to understanding Is not to attempt to rationalise everything and everyone. What's ' Normal ' to us may not be to them. See them as a human being first and an Individual. Gain their friendship by treating them as equal and the answers will come.

High Threshold · Post by **High Threshold** » Tue Jan 13, 2015 8:41 am

Oscar Namechange;1471489 wrote: The key to understanding Is not to attempt to rationalise everything and everyone. What's ' Normal ' to us may not be to them. See them as a human being first and an Individual. Gain their friendship by treating them as equal and the answers will come.

I understand that but it is a bit like ignoring the growl of the tiger and stepping closer.

AnneBoleyn · Post by **AnneBoleyn** » Tue Jan 13, 2015 9:18 am

I've found it's not always necessary to understand.

Post by **Oscar Namechange** » Tue Jan 13, 2015 9:31 am

AnneBoleyn;1471492 wrote: I've found it's not always necessary to understand.

I agree.

Substitute ' understand' with ' accept ' .

FourPart · Post by **FourPart** » Tue Jan 13, 2015 12:19 pm

It may be that they're not fake, but the result of hormone treatment preceding a Gender Reversal.

G#Gill · Post by **G#Gill** » Tue Jan 13, 2015 12:28 pm

How about when next you see this guy, just approach him casually and say 'Hi' to him. Then take it from there! It may not be a good idea for a woman to approach him, but another fella's friendliness may produce some dialogue ? Just a thought.

High Threshold · Post by **High Threshold** » Tue Jan 13, 2015 9:51 pm

FourPart;1471515 wrote: It may be that they're not fake, but the result of hormone treatment preceding a Gender Reversal.

He'd have to have access to a time machine in that case because sometimes they are there and sometimes not. He probably has a Dr. Who telephone box somewhere in town.

High Threshold · Post by **High Threshold** » Tue Jan 13, 2015 9:59 pm

G#Gill;1471520 wrote: How about when next you see this guy, just approach him casually and say 'Hi' to him. Then take it from there! It may not be a good idea for a woman to approach him, but another fella's friendliness may produce some dialogue ? Just a thought.

I have thought of that but these fellows often have phenomenal memories and if the encounter goes pear-shaped he'll probably accost me every time he sees me thereafter. No thanks. I've already got one of those (another one) ¦.... I made the mistake of shaking his hand (just to be civil) and now when he sees me on the bus he sits adjacent to me, turns on his seat and just stares at me at close quarters the whole journey. It is extremely unnerving! Ladies! I now understand you!

Post by **Peter Lake** » Wed Jan 14, 2015 12:23 am

G#Gill;1471520 wrote: How about when next you see this guy, just approach him casually and say 'Hi' to him. Then take it from there! It may not be a good idea for a woman to approach him, but another fella's friendliness may produce some dialogue ? Just a thought.

Why are you assuming he'd be a danger to a woman if she approached him? He may find a woman less confrontational.

theia · Post by **theia** » Wed Jan 14, 2015 1:30 am

I worked with a similar person some years ago in a drop in centre. We related very well and he used to call me "mum"

High Threshold · Post by **High Threshold** » Wed Jan 14, 2015 8:24 am

theia;1471551 wrote: I worked with a similar person some years ago in a drop in centre. We related very well and he used to call me "mum"

Interesting. Do you reckon this fellow thinks of himself as a woman? I have not the slightest impression that he's homosexual or lecherous, it's only the bulges under his jumper and the over-the-top soprano voice. I can see that he might like to be thought of as a woman except that his "tits" are way too enormous and his hair is status quo short. Actually, if you were to see him (without the babooooms and hearing his voice) you'd think he was quite normal. There's just something he wants to say with his body language. He positions himself where the flow of commuters will pass near him and when a bus comes in he immediately steps up close the the windows so the passenger can't miss him .... but he doesn't actually look at anyone .... he just makes his presence difficult to ignore, sort of like a teenager who starts puffing on a cigarette in a matter of fact profile as a soon as his peers come into view. Almost too obviously saying, "Oh! I didn't see you there. I was just thinking of something else and having a casual smoke like I always do." You know what I mean?

Bruv · Post by **Bruv** » Wed Jan 14, 2015 10:19 am

While you are concerned so much about him........I am having worries about you.

High Threshold · Post by **High Threshold** » Wed Jan 14, 2015 11:20 am

Bruv;1471559 wrote: While you are concerned so much about him........I am having worries about you.

Oh, I hit a nerve. Sorry mate, I didn't know.

tude dog · Post by **tude dog** » Thu Jan 15, 2015 3:11 pm

From what you describe my bet is he is some sort of street performer.

Street performance

By now he must be something of a fixture around town.

Take some pics and keep us updated.

Post by **Oscar Namechange** » Thu Jan 15, 2015 4:08 pm

When I was a kid, we had a local character.

Loving In a small town, we had to go through Shoreham By Sea to get to Brighton and pass the bridge along the South Coast road Into Worthing on a crossroads. Almost every day, this character was on the side of the road at the bridge waving at cars.

I can see him now. About 60 years old, bald, slim, he always wore Immaculate white flannel trousers, a striped blazer and straw boater, he always had a cane that he swung as he strutted around. The epitome of the Quintessentially English Gent. He also wore a Monocle. He didn't walk but strutted up and down all day long waving to passing cars. Depending on their response, he'd either bow or flick two fingers up.

I don't know exactly who In my family gave him his nickname but we forever after called him The German Spy.

I can remember as a small child how dissapointed my brother and I were If passing the bridge, the German Spy was not there and how excited we'd get knowing we were going Into town and we may see him.

He was there at the same spot for years and when I was much older ( about 19 ) I decided to go and speak to him one day. I was very nervous but he turned out to be lovely and somewhere In my house, there's a photograph my pal took of him with me.

One day he just vanished and rumours were he died leaving a multi million pound estate.

FourPart · Post by **FourPart** » Thu Jan 15, 2015 4:15 pm

Oscar Namechange;1471620 wrote: When I was a kid, we had a local character.

Loving In a small town, we had to go through Shoreham By Sea to get to Brighton and pass the bridge along the South Coast road Into Worthing on a crossroads. Almost every day, this character was on the side of the road at the bridge waving at cars.

I can see him now. About 60 years old, bald, slim, he always wore Immaculate white flannel trousers, a striped blazer and straw boater, he always had a cane that he swung as he strutted around. The epitome of the Quintessentially English Gent. He also wore a Monocle. He didn't walk but strutted up and down all day long waving to passing cars. Depending on their response, he'd either bow or flick two fingers up.

I don't know exactly who In my family gave him his nickname but we forever after called him The German Spy.

I can remember as a small child how dissapointed my brother and I were If passing the bridge, the German Spy was not there and how excited we'd get knowing we were going Into town and we may see him.

He was there at the same spot for years and when I was much older ( about 19 ) I decided to go and speak to him one day. I was very nervous but he turned out to be lovely and somewhere In my house, there's a photograph my pal took of him with me.

One day he just vanished and rumours were he died leaving a multi million pound estate.
You sure you're not thinking of the Monopoly logo?

along-for-the-ride · Post by **along-for-the-ride** » Thu Jan 15, 2015 4:17 pm

“Everything that irritates us about others can lead us to an understanding of ourselves.

Carl Gustav Jung quote

Post by **Oscar Namechange** » Thu Jan 15, 2015 5:12 pm

FourPart;1471621 wrote: You sure you're not thinking of the Monopoly logo?
I'll try very hard to find time to dig out that photograph of him.

theia · Post by **theia** » Fri Jan 16, 2015 5:49 am

High Threshold;1471557 wrote: Interesting. Do you reckon this fellow thinks of himself as a woman? I have not the slightest impression that he's homosexual or lecherous, it's only the bulges under his jumper and the over-the-top soprano voice. I can see that he might like to be thought of as a woman except that his "tits" are way too enormous and his hair is status quo short. Actually, if you were to see him (without the babooooms and hearing his voice) you'd think he was quite normal. There's just something he wants to say with his body language. He positions himself where the flow of commuters will pass near him and when a bus comes in he immediately steps up close the the windows so the passenger can't miss him .... but he doesn't actually look at anyone .... he just makes his presence difficult to ignore, sort of like a teenager who starts puffing on a cigarette in a matter of fact profile as a soon as his peers come into view. Almost too obviously saying, "Oh! I didn't see you there. I was just thinking of something else and having a casual smoke like I always do." You know what I mean?

I think the person I worked with was very confused with life in general (and who's to say that he wasn't right to be, with the world as it is?). His appearance, in ill fitting flowing skirts and odd tops, was confusing to the onlooker as it didn't really define whether he wanted a female or male look.

The amazing thing is that I never witnessed this lad being tormented or teased about the way he was even though the centre was inner city, an almost no go area for the police and catered for ex offenders, homeless people and those addicted to drugs and alcohol.

Bruv · Post by **Bruv** » Fri Jan 16, 2015 6:18 am

High Threshold;1471564 wrote: Oh, I hit a nerve. Sorry mate, I didn't know.

Where I work we have a person in the process of transferring gender from male to female.

He/she is over six feet tall and as thin as a bean pole with just short of shoulder length straight hair that during the short time she/he has been employed here has gone through blonde streaks to the current plum red.

Today while sitting in the company canteen with some visiting work colleagues the lady appeared and stood at the coffee machine with a canvas bag hanging from her shoulder decorated with a My Little Pony design..............to my shame I had a snot exploding fit of uncontrollable laughter.

Should I go for counseling ?

Post by **LarsMac** » Fri Jan 16, 2015 7:33 am

Bruv;1471636 wrote: Where I work we have a person in the process of transferring gender from male to female.

He/she is over six feet tall and as thin as a bean pole with just short of shoulder length straight hair that during the short time she/he has been employed here has gone through blonde streaks to the current plum red.

Today while sitting in the company canteen with some visiting work colleagues the lady appeared and stood at the coffee machine with a canvas bag hanging from her shoulder decorated with a My Little Pony design..............to my shame I had a snot exploding fit of uncontrollable laughter.

Should I go for counseling ?

Oh, definitely.

I know that I would need counseling after something like that.

High Threshold · Post by **High Threshold** » Fri Jan 16, 2015 11:51 pm

Bruv;1471636 wrote: Where I work we have a person in the process of transferring gender from male to female.

He/she is over six feet tall and as thin as a bean pole with just short of shoulder length straight hair that during the short time she/he has been employed here has gone through blonde streaks to the current plum red.

Today while sitting in the company canteen with some visiting work colleagues the lady appeared and stood at the coffee machine with a canvas bag hanging from her shoulder decorated with a My Little Pony design..............to my shame I had a snot exploding fit of uncontrollable laughter.

Should I go for counseling ?

Would it be possible for us to share the cost?

High Threshold · Post by **High Threshold** » Fri Jan 16, 2015 11:57 pm

tude dog;1471619 wrote: From what you describe my bet is he is some sort of street performer.

Street performance

By now he must be something of a fixture around town.

Take some pics and keep us updated.

He's a fixture alright. Can't wait to see his summer wardrobe .... what could be larger than basket balls do you think?

High Threshold · Post by **High Threshold** » Sat Jan 17, 2015 12:03 am

FourPart;1471621 wrote: You sure you're not thinking of the Monopoly logo?

That was uncalled for!

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