Misogynistic sadism

[spot]

I find it annoying when new words get hijacked.

Here’s some history from the Incel Wikipedia page:

The first website to use the term "incel" was "Alana's Involuntary Celibacy Project", founded in 1997 by a Canadian university student known only by her first name, Alana, to discuss her sexual inactivity with others. […] In 1997, she started a mailing list on the topic that used the abbreviation INVCEL, later shortened to "incel", for "anybody of any gender who was lonely, had never had sex or who hadn't had a relationship in a long time".

During her college years and after, Alana realized she was bisexual and became more comfortable with her identity. Around 2000, she stopped participating in her online project and gave the site to a stranger. In 2018, Alana said of her project: "It definitely wasn't a bunch of guys blaming women for their problems. That's a pretty sad version of this phenomenon that's happening today. Things have changed in the last 20 years".

When she read about the 2014 Isla Vista killings, and that parts of the incel subculture glorified the perpetrator, she wrote: "Like a scientist who invented something that ended up being a weapon of war, I can't uninvent this word, nor restrict it to the nicer people who need it". She expressed regret at the change in usage from her original intent of creating an "inclusive community" for people of all genders who were sexually deprived due to social awkwardness, marginalization, or mental illness.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Incel

It may be that this definition is no longer recoverable. I find that unfortunate, it’s a good word in that context.

The new reading is summed up in the single quote offered by the OED: “A world where Instagram influencers damage self-esteem..and lonely virgin men become ‘incel’ terrorists. New Statesman 2018”.

That, the new meaning, reflects misogyny. I suggest we now have three words in use: misogyny, sadism and this ill-defined miasma “incel”. The latter has been expanded to “incel culture” and become a media craze for what is more clearly expressed as misogynistic sadism. People of all genders who are sexually deprived due to social awkwardness, marginalization, or mental illness are left without a category. If anyone can think of one, now that “incel” has been destroyed, please suggest it.

The actual problem, misogynistic sadism, exemplified by the "Andrew Tate" brand get-rich-quick media channels, is indeed a magnet to lads drawn into such spaces by social media amplifier algorithms. The experience will no doubt be educational, the lads need to learn to recognize profiteering by algorithm and to despise it accordingly. Dress better, stop hanging around with lads who can’t clean up their act, your disease is a mindset biased by horrible nasty rich folk you'll never meet who treat you like food. As for the actual misogynistic sadists, they’ve always existed, they’ve rarely been so publicized but I don’t believe they’re incels regardless of how you redefine the word. They’re misogynistic sadists, and if they have social media channels, they're profiteering leeches as well. To help you distinguish on social media, incels do not own expensive cars or helicopters.

[Betty Boop]

I've been trying to reply to this thread for days, but I am suffering with awful brain fog and an inability to focus. I got some AI help, told AI how I felt about your post and she helped me generate this response.

Thanks for the thoughtful history—it's genuinely illuminating to know the original context of “incel” was more inclusive and rooted in support. That said, I don’t think linguistic drift is the core issue here. Words change all the time, especially in online spaces where communities repurpose terms with viral speed, often for worse. We’ve lost “incel” in its original sense, no doubt—but trying to rescue the word feels like focusing on the wrong fire.

What matters now is what’s actually happening: we’re seeing a rise in public, monetized misogynistic sadism masquerading as male empowerment. That's the real enemy—not the corruption of a label, but the normalisation and commodification of cruelty. Influencers like Andrew Tate aren’t confused loners—they're deliberate operators of a business model that thrives on algorithmic exploitation, selling insecurity and hate to boys and men.

And here’s the real tragedy: the people who should have benefited from Alana’s original vision—those isolated by awkwardness, mental illness, or marginalization—are now actively harmed by the mainstreaming of this hate. They’re no longer seen as deserving of support, but as ticking time bombs. So yes, we can mourn the semantic shift, but what we should really be doing is dismantling the system that turned a support group into a slur, and a slur into a brand.

The lads caught in this mess need more than lectures—they need better male role models, critical media literacy, and a cultural shift that stops excusing this behaviour as “boys being boys” or “just trolling.” They need to understand that those helicopters and sports cars aren’t symbols of rebellion, they’re marketing assets in a con. The misogynistic sadists aren’t victims of society—they’re predators, and they’re eating the disaffected for profit.

So by all means, let’s be accurate in our terms. But let’s not waste energy policing language when we should be dismantling the machinery that turns loneliness into violence.