mrsK's Thought /Joke of the Day

CARLA · Post by **CARLA** » Thu Mar 09, 2006 8:26 pm

I knew I should have become a Doctor..!! :wah: :wah:

lady cop · Post by **lady cop** » Fri Mar 10, 2006 8:52 am

oh i love the prawn story!

theia · Post by **theia** » Sun Mar 12, 2006 1:28 am

I just love "Prawn again Christian" :wah:

CARLA · Post by **CARLA** » Sun Mar 12, 2006 2:15 pm

Cute !! :wah: :wah:

Uncle Kram · Post by **Uncle Kram** » Thu Mar 16, 2006 2:18 pm

With luv from Unc

Two men dressed in pilots' uniforms walk up the aisle of the

airplane. Both are wearing dark glasses; one is using a guide dog

and the other is tapping his way along the aisle with a cane.

Nervous laughter spreads through the cabin, but the men enter the

cockpit, the door closes, and the engines start up.

The passengers begin glancing around nervously, searching for some

sign that this is just a little practical joke. No sign is

forthcoming. The plane moves faster and faster down the runway and

the people sitting in the window seats realize that they are headed

straight for the water at the edge of the airport.

Just as it begins to look as though the plane will plough into the

water, panicked screams fill the cabin. At that moment, the plane

lifts smoothly into the air. The passengers relax and laugh a

little sheepishly, and soon all retreat into their magazines,

secure in the knowledge that the plane is in good hands.

In the cockpit, one of the blind pilots turns to the other and

says, "You know, Bob, one of these days they're going to scream too

late and we're all going to die."

minks · Post by **minks** » Thu Mar 16, 2006 2:24 pm

>A goldfish has a memory span of three seconds. I am a goldfish how cool

>On a Canadian two dollar bill, the flag flying over the Parliament building

>is an American flag. These do not exist anymore

>

chonsigirl · Post by **chonsigirl** » Thu Mar 16, 2006 3:27 pm

Oh, I bet that Canadian bill is worth bucks if you have an old one laying around!

minks · Post by **minks** » Fri Mar 17, 2006 2:44 pm

chonsigirl wrote: Oh, I bet that Canadian bill is worth bucks if you have an old one laying around!

Ya know I am not so sure about that. Only recently (I think within the last decade) that we took them out of circulation for our $2.00 coin which by the way we nickname the toonie. It was a kind of pale salmon color bill. Weird that funny colored Canadian money eh.

minks · Post by **minks** » Fri Mar 17, 2006 2:45 pm

mrsK wrote: A Married couple are driving along a highway doing a steady forty miles per hour.

The wife is behind the wheel.

Her husband suddenly looks across at her and speaks in a clear voice "I know we've been married for twenty years, but I want a divorce."

The wife says nothing, keeps looking at the road ahead but slowly increases her speed to 45mph.

The husband speaks again. "I don't want you to try and talk me out of it," he says, "because I've been having an affair with your best friend, and she's a far better lover than you are."

Again the wife stays quiet, but grips the steering wheel more tightly and slowly increases the speed to 55.

He pushes his luck. "I want the house," he says insistently.

Up to 60.

"I want the car, too," he continues.

65 mph.

"And," he says, "I'll have the bank accounts, all the credit cards and the boat!"

The car slowly starts veering towards a massive concrete bridge.

This makes him nervous, so he asks her: "Isn't there anything you want?"

The wife at last replies-in a quiet and controlled voice. "No,

I've got everything I need," she says.

"Oh, really," he inquires, "So what have you got?"

Just before they slam into the wall at 70 mph, the wife turns to him and smiles.

"The airbag."

Moral of the Story: Women are clever b :-4 tches. Don't mess with them.

Ohhh that was rich ahahahahahaha I love it.

Accountable · Post by **Accountable** » Sat Mar 18, 2006 8:04 am

mrsK wrote: Any given situation is an opportunity to change things for the better!

"It's just too hot to wear clothes today," Jack says as he stepped out of the shower, "honey, what do you think the neighbours would think if I mowed the lawn like this?"

"Probably that I married you for your money," she replied.
:yh_rotfl :yh_rotfl

Accountable · Post by **Accountable** » Sat Mar 18, 2006 5:32 pm

Two, Three, Four

StupidCowboyTricks · Post by **StupidCowboyTricks** » Sat Mar 18, 2006 5:42 pm

Accountable wrote:

Two, Three, Four

well!

abbey · Post by **abbey** » Tue Mar 21, 2006 12:03 am

How have i missed this thread

It's give me a good laugh this morning, cheers x. :-6

Post by **Betty Boop** » Thu Mar 23, 2006 3:42 pm

:yh_rotfl :yh_rotfl

Accountable · Post by **Accountable** » Sat Mar 25, 2006 4:13 pm

I saw that recapped on one those blooper shows just the other night. :wah:

theia · Post by **theia** » Sun Mar 26, 2006 1:12 pm

I like your jokes, mrsK. Even though I might not always respond, they always give me a laugh. Thank you

Lil~Basco · Post by **Lil~Basco** » Sun Mar 26, 2006 1:53 pm

mrsK wrote: A man's sitting reading his newspaper when his wife walks in and whacks him one on the back of the head with a frying pan "What the hell was that for"?!, he asks, completely stunned. That was for the piece of paper in your pocket with the name 'Mary-Ellen' written on it, she replies.

"Don't be silly" he says. Two weeks ago when I went to the races 'Mary-Ellen' was the name of a horse I bet on.

The wife seems satisfied and apologies for clubbing him.

Three days later, he's sitting in his chair reading again, when she hammers him right on the back of the head with an even bigger frying pan, knocking him out cold.

When he comes round, he asks again "What the hell was that for"?! "Your bloody horse phoned"
:wah: Good one mrsK....it reminded me of clipper because of the frying pan....but I'm sure clipper never got himself in this predicament!