Hello friends........

[mominiowa]

Ok --This is going to be another Mom feeling sorry for herself thread...so if you want to move on......and not read it--I completely understand...

As many of you know-I am on my way back to the city tomorrow..I should be counting my blessings that I was given a whole week to be with my children before returning....but I am mad as hell its not longer..I know I should be less selfish...but here I am 2 AM and I can not sleep as I am wondering how this or that will get done...My daughter was bit today by dog and had to get a shot at the hospital..They said watch her for 10 days(like I am going to be able to watch her being in Iowa City :-1 ) and also the dog was taken into the vet to be watched as the owner could not produce paper work on his dog...this was the SAME dog we had turned in on numerous times for neglect and my daughter thought it was necessary to feed her because we knew the owners haven't been...She took hot dogs over and went to feed her and she bit right through her finger nail.OUCH! So of course WE were wrong for feeding the poor thing and my daughter getting bit...Blah blah--then I come un-glued on one of my dear friends..she has just been so angry about her life lately and I bit her in the butt when she was making a big whooped-di-dooo about her mom not watching her son so she could go somewhere --I was like--"your kidding right?" I wanted to scream...you all expect me to be Happy and Strong....they say things like--ohh be positive and yada yada..I wanted to say--just because I have cancer doesn't mean I can't complain and cry and scream and let the world know I have fits of jealously and rage...and hate everything about this!!! ***I know -if they could only read this forum...this is why I don't tell many friends about it*** I really don't want them to know I whine to you all....LOL See y'all mad me smile already!

I have come to the conclusion that life is short and that I am full of life--I just can't find it right now........I leave tomorrow at 4ish--so if ya got any extra prayers around that time--please yell one out..I will hate that lonely drive...but I will hate walking out that door again and watching my kids' faces as I pull away the most!!!....Thank you for allowing me to vent..I appreciate it more then you know...and if you want to drop me an email at toadyx4@hotmail.com I will have my laptop with me--my chemo lasts about 4 hours a day -then 15 mins of radiation...so the rest of my day is open for conversation...I just can't drive back and forth with 2.84$ gas....so I have to stay....BLAHHHH:mad: maybe MOM needs fast moped...LOL ..anyway--Good night---or good morning....:-6

[AussiePam]

((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((( Mom ))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))

I'm sending a big load of hugs and prayers. So sorry to hear about your daughter getting bit by the dog when she was trying to do the right thing by it. You didn't need that extra worry. And please - you have friends here. Yell and kick all you want. I don't blame you at all. I'd do it too!!!!!!!! Just about to get supper here - so can't stay long right now, but I'll be back. And I've got the hotmail address. If you've left before I return, have a safe drive!! And sing raucously as you go!!!

[4rum]

Mornin' ma'am;

I agree with Mizz Pam. If anyone is entitled to a little rant... it's you. I know all the stuff we'er supposed to say to folks, but you've heard that a thousand times..."be strong"... "look on the bright side" ... "God has a purpose" ... maybe... maybe... but us folks ain't always there... we don't see the fear... taste the disgust... hear the sobs in the dark.

I've been very lucky, good health, two grown sons, both within 10 minutes of me. I truely have blessings to spare... so ...

blessings sweetie

4rum

[Betty Boop]

:yh_hugs :yh_hugs to you Mom, keep your chin up :-4

[Peg]

Rant, vent, SCREAM here if it helps. Do what it takes to make YOU feel better. My thoughts, prayers, and love are with you. Been going through some trying times myself and then I think how much worse you and others have it. It makes me mad that our government supports people in every other nation and our people have to struggle. Have you talk to a social service worker at the hospital about maybe helping with transportation, getting help around the house when you are away, etc.? When you are feeling down, just remember you are rich in love. Hope it helps even if it's just a little bit.

[CARLA]

Mom, Life is a test sometimes that we just doesn't seem to able to pass. But then one day things turn around and it all becomes clear.. The good Lord above can test me every day, 24 hours a day thats fine by me, I will pass the test eventually, and I will be better off for it.

Your an amazing strong women with a great family around you, that is what counts. You scream, yell, kick, do what ever is necessary to get through these tough days ahead. Your friend sees life different than you, most who haven't had to deal with a life threatening injury or illness do, they will get it in time, patience is a virtue and hard to hold onto at times.

You know what I did when I was at my worst physically, and not sure how it was all going to play out.. I COLORED, YEP GOT ME A BRAND NEW PACK OF CRAYONS, AND 3 OR 4 COLORING BOOKS AND COLORED TILL I COULD COLOR NO MORE..!! I made everyone who came to see me, color with me.. you know what I still color to this day, it is peaceful thing to do and everyone loves.

Might I be so bold an to say stop and pick up some new crayons, and some coloring books and have at it women...!! :-4

[Bryn Mawr]

mominiowa wrote:

As many of you know-I am on my way back to the city tomorrow..I should be counting my blessings that I was given a whole week to be with my children before returning....


That hurt so much. How do you live with a situation like that? Because you must More powr to you.

[lady cop]

just wrote you at that addy you posted. this is the season of hope sweetheart. so hope. i do for you. :yh_flower :yh_flower :yh_flower

[Amie]

CARLA wrote: Mom, Life is a test sometimes that we just doesn't seem to able to pass. But then one day things turn around and it all becomes clear.. The good Lord above can test me every day, 24 hours a day thats fine by me, I will pass the test eventually, and I will be better off for it.

Your an amazing strong women with a great family around you, that is what counts. You scream, yell, kick, do what ever is necessary to get through these tough days ahead. Your friend sees life different than you, most who haven't had to deal with a life threatening injury or illness do, they will get it in time, patience is a virtue and hard to hold onto at times.

You know what I did when I was at my worst physically, and not sure how it was all going to play out.. I COLORED, YEP GOT ME A BRAND NEW PACK OF CRAYONS, AND 3 OR 4 COLORING BOOKS AND COLORED TILL I COULD COLOR NO MORE..!! I made everyone who came to see me, color with me.. you know what I still color to this day, it is peaceful thing to do and everyone loves.

Might I be so bold an to say stop and pick up some new crayons, and some coloring books and have at it women...!! :-4


Carla is right. I coloured in kids colouring books everytime I got really down and felt like there was nothing good happening and hospital was driving me insane. It's so therapuetic. A friend in the states sent me my first book and pencils, and i was hooked after that.

[minks]

Awww mom, nice to hear from you even with your heart hurt. But we are glad you are hanging in there and we are all here as support.

Cheers

Minks