Would you tell 'em to get stuffed?

cherandbuster · Post by **cherandbuster** » Wed Aug 02, 2006 6:04 am

Hiya Pinky --

Life is short. Too damn short.

Meet with your old friend. And be sure to find out what happened.

I bet it had *nothing* to do with you and she was going through a rough time.

Let us know what happens :-6

pantsonfire321@aol.com · Wed Aug 02, 2006 6:06 am

Give it a go - at least find out the reason they stopped calling .

chonsigirl · Post by **chonsigirl** » Wed Aug 02, 2006 6:07 am

Yes, I think go and find out what happened.

Marie5656 · Post by **Marie5656** » Wed Aug 02, 2006 6:53 am

Interesting question. I did have this happen to me. I had become good friends (or so I thought) with someone who lived in my apartment complex. This was 12 years ago.

When I bought my house, she seemed all excited for me. And came to visit. Then nothing. This was in the pre everyone has an email address days. A couple of years later, I happened to be near the apartment complex, and decided to drop by. She had moved.

Back to your question, I probably would get together. Just once or twice as a catch up. Not sure if this go around the friendship would stick though. In this particular case, there are alot of other variables to consider.

cars · Post by **cars** » Wed Aug 02, 2006 7:05 am

Pinky wrote: Say an old friend contacted you out of the blue...a friend that you got on really well with, had laughs with, etc, until one day they cut you dead - blanked you completely. No response to messages, phone calls etc.

Then, totally out of the blue, you get a message asking if you can go and meet up with them...would you bother? Tell them to get stuffed, ignore it totally or go anyway, if only to get some answers?

Since you mentioned this is a guy, do you think you have amorous "feelings" for him? If not, then go find out why the cold shoulder. If you do, well then it gets a bit more sticky! Best wishes & good luck in whatever you decide!

minks · Post by **minks** » Wed Aug 02, 2006 7:14 am

Oh knowing myself I would likely just let it go and walk away....

Go with what you want to do the most P go with what your heart tells ya.

CheshireCat · Post by **CheshireCat** » Wed Aug 02, 2006 7:20 am

I would go. There could be all kinds of reasons for the dissapearance. Being someone that has suffered with depression in the past, sometimes life got to be so overwhelming and exhausting that there was just no possible way to stay connected to people. Thank goodness I got myself healthy ( and some lexapro). When I came around I found that I really needed to reconnect with old friends, and luckilly I got a second chance from most of them.

You don't have to leave yourself wide open, but give the guy a chance, hear him out.

sunny104 · Post by **sunny104** » Wed Aug 02, 2006 9:17 am

I dunno, I'm the type to let people/things in the past stay there......

cherandbuster · Post by **cherandbuster** » Wed Aug 02, 2006 9:21 am

CheshireCat wrote: I would go. There could be all kinds of reasons for the dissapearance. Being someone that has suffered with depression in the past, sometimes life got to be so overwhelming and exhausting that there was just no possible way to stay connected to people. Thank goodness I got myself healthy ( and some lexapro). When I came around I found that I really needed to reconnect with old friends, and luckilly I got a second chance from most of them.

You don't have to leave yourself wide open, but give the guy a chance, hear him out.

CSquared (my nickname for you) --

I like what you have to say here. I agree! :-6

Rapunzel · Post by **Rapunzel** » Wed Aug 02, 2006 10:52 am

Pinky wrote: Ya know what? I'm not going to bother. I've always said that my door is always open to any of my friends, whatever time of day or night. I never let any of my friends, male or female feel like they have to be lonely..I used to think nothing of him turning up at mine at silly hours needing a chat, but people only kick me in the teeth the once, as far as I'm concerned.

I just can't be arsed!

Its a shame though! If you don't go, you'll always wonder . . . and what could one drink hurt?

Maybe he was protecting you from something upsetting. It might not have been a kick in the teeth at all. My best friend and I once dated 2 blokes who were best friends. My BF told me her BF was seeing someone else too. I should have told her but I knew she'd be heart-broken and I knew she'd blame me and it would ruin our friendship. So I acted ignorant and pretended I didn't know either. She found out eventually. She was shocked. I acted shocked. She cried on my shoulder. But she got over it and we're still best friends. You'll never know the reason unless you see him and ask why. If the reason is sh*t then at least you'll know, you'll have had a nice drink and you can pack that episode in your life away with no loose ends. What can it hurt? :-2

CheshireCat · Post by **CheshireCat** » Wed Aug 02, 2006 11:12 am

cherandbuster wrote: CSquared (my nickname for you) --

I like what you have to say here. I agree! :-6

I like it Cher!:p

CARLA · Post by **CARLA** » Wed Aug 02, 2006 9:26 pm

You beat me to it Snooze I was going to say the exact same thing..

Pinkster do what feels right for you, if you don't want to go don't, and be done with it. I would have asked the question on the first call. "Hey what the heck happened haven't heard a peep from you in a year???"

Then he might say I was in prison, or got married, or just lost your number whatever but you would know something before seeing him again..:-3 Then tell him to get stuffed..:wah:

[QUOTE]I think I would've asked why I hadn't heard from them when I finally heard from them. Did he say anything about it when you talked to him (was it on the phone or what?)?[/QUOTE]

AussiePam · Post by **AussiePam** » Thu Aug 03, 2006 12:29 am

I'd go, but I'd make sure I was looking my absolute most delectable best - and I'd play it friendly but very very very cool. Give him a hearing. And - unless there was some world shattering reason to explain why he dropped you from a great height - I'd walk, with a wave and a smile. Leaving him knowing he'd fuqqed up and lost out big time. Poor silly bastard. He really did fuqq up and lose out big time. Friendship with Pinky!!! WOW.

(The only person who really ever quite did that to me was a girl I grew up with, one of my best friends at school, in fact. When we were in our final year at university, she got strictly religious suddenly, and told me she could no longer be friends with outsiders. It broke my heart at the time. Years later I met her again at a school reunion. She seemed to be leading a normal life, mixing with outsiders.. and greeted me like a long lost sister, but I couldn't go there. When it's over it's over).

Bez · Post by **Bez** » Thu Aug 03, 2006 1:55 am

I'm afraid I wouldn't go....but that's me....things move on and change.

If your reaction when you got the message was positive and you thought ..."hey I'm really glad to here from him" then go.

If you thought negative stuff (which is kind of what I'm picking up), then don't bother.

'Todays strangers are tomorrows friends' - there are plenty of human beings on this planet that deserve to be you friend Pinky

cherandbuster · Post by **cherandbuster** » Thu Aug 03, 2006 6:19 am

Bez wrote: 'Todays strangers are tomorrows friends' - there are plenty of human beings on this planet that deserve to be you friend Pinky

I like that Bez

I like it a lot :-6

Shweet tatersalad · Post by **Shweet tatersalad** » Thu Aug 03, 2006 6:46 am

Pink,you need too find out what went on.

It's natural too assume the negative.If this was a Friend you cared about on any level he deserves too be heard.This way you have all the info too make your judgment.

You need too know both sides too pick one side.

Sheryl · Post by **Sheryl** » Thu Aug 03, 2006 6:51 am

I wonder if he had a jealous girlfriend who didn't like him having friends of the opposite sex.

I say go, just cause I'm curious to why he stopped talking to you.

CheshireCat · Post by **CheshireCat** » Thu Aug 03, 2006 7:17 am

Maybe you could text him back and ask for some kind of abbreviated version of what went on. Just to make sure he isn't selling Amway or trying to borrow money.

You're a smart lady, you'll know what to do, FOR YOU!:-6

AussiePam · Post by **AussiePam** » Thu Aug 03, 2006 2:20 pm

Selling Amway.. grin..

I remember going to a party on a Saturday evening a few years ago and spotting a totally hunky bloke. Our eyes met across a crowded room, and very soon we were dancing. Later on he asked for my telephone number and I gave it to him. Then waited impatiently all Sunday for the hoped for call. I got it on Monday, from his office. He was an insurance salesman. Humiliating!!!!