A wonderful husband

kmhowe72 · Post by **kmhowe72** » Sat Mar 19, 2005 11:00 pm

Even though my husband and I don't live together full time. we still maintain a wonderful relationship. when he is here he gives me a break from the house work, and the kids and let's me do my own thing. and i don't really go out and do thing's with out him. Like we go to the gym together. he watches the kids and then I do, and go to movies with the kids. Or rent the movie when we cannot bring the kids. We eat out almost every week. Not so much latly. But when he is here he does the cooking. We don't trust our kids with anyone else but the two of us. we don't even like to trust them with our relatives.

It never get's boring. we event things to do. We go bowling or like to six flags we always bring a third person to help out. I no that sounds strange. But we even have family game night. we are each otheres best friends. when he is not home we talk on the phone. It's great. and we both get the same benifit out it.

koan · Post by **koan** » Sat Mar 19, 2005 11:52 pm

Are you presenting this as a good marriage? Because I've heard of better situations. I'm glad it's not worse but...?

Post by **kensloft** » Sun Mar 20, 2005 4:53 am

Is this a platonic relationship?

Paula · Post by **Paula** » Sun Mar 20, 2005 6:13 am

Part-time man, thats a good thing. He can have his cake and eat it too? :wah:

kmhowe72 · Post by **kmhowe72** » Sun Mar 20, 2005 7:32 am

When people don't have space then the arguements begin and the fighting. It's wonderful for me, because if we fight, we don't fight infront of the children most of the times. My husband can get more rest for work. When the kids are sick they respond to me better, so when my children are up late at night crying my husband is able to sleep, so he can be refresshed for work.

Their are other people like me, who are married but live apart. My theripist says it brings freshness into the relationship. My husband and I can regroup, and be excited to see each othere and be together. Yes it's a little odd. But we fight less and love each othere more. In our situation.

I have notice that people who contiunelessy live together on dialy bases well they get in fights more. Their is not the fresh quality. My husband when we first got together we just couldn't live together all the time. Sometimes I wish we could be together all the time. But it's unlikely that that would ever happen. And if it did it wouldn't be for a long while to come. :wah:

Were not divorced, we love each other and I got tell you it helps us out in othere areas to. My children are still to little to know the difference. I personaly rather not have a stressful marriage. And we don't accept for the occassional crises. :-5

koan · Post by **koan** » Sun Mar 20, 2005 9:27 pm

So...you are recommending this arrangement. That is the only conclusion I have been able to come to. Yes?

I would have to disagree. This is not love. Your children should not grow up thinking this is a good marriage.

kmhowe72 · Post by **kmhowe72** » Sun Mar 20, 2005 9:43 pm

no, I am not recommending this kind of relatioship. I am just saying what works for us. :-6

kmhowe72 · Post by **kmhowe72** » Sun Mar 20, 2005 11:26 pm

you don't have to be unhappy to see a theripist. If must know I have ssen a theripist six years before I married my husband. It after I lost three children in a custody battle with x. ok, if you must know. and I am not going into anymore detail then that.

It's always good to have somebody help you through lifes difficulties. Some choose to see theripist some choose not. I hardly see her much anymore. maybe twice amonth if that. i am also ADD.

along-for-the-ride · Post by **along-for-the-ride** » Mon Mar 21, 2005 2:52 pm

Any 2 people (husband/wife, brother/sister, parent/child, friend/friend) living together can get on each other's nerves. Do no place the blame on marriage, per say. By living with someone, we learn compromise, common courtesy, compassion, and trust.

To me, there is no such thing as a "part-time" marriage. You are either married or not. You are either committed to each other or not.

This is just my opinion, so take it with a grain of salt.

kmhowe72 · Post by **kmhowe72** » Mon Mar 21, 2005 3:01 pm

Well that's good you don't believe in a part time marriage. I don't either. But it works for us. we are two peopple who have loved each othere so much, that we want to save our marriage. I am not the only one in this town. My town, and in my church to choose to live this way. There are many otheres. :driving: Don't put something down unless you have tried it.

smithy87 · Post by **smithy87** » Wed Mar 23, 2005 10:17 am

Although, like many, I do find this situation strange its actually more common than I thought. Where I work, a colleagues brother lives apart from his partner even though they have a daughter and another baby on the way.

Its not something I would choose. I have been with my hubby for 7 years and married 3yrs. I couldn't say that an arrangement like that would work for us, but hey...each to their own :yh_love

Post by **kensloft** » Fri Mar 25, 2005 10:27 am

Long distance love works for some not for others. Whatever keeps it right for you is OK.

kmhowe72 · Post by **kmhowe72** » Sat Mar 26, 2005 12:54 pm

my husband and I don't have a log distance relationship. he lives 6 min. away from me.

koan · Post by **koan** » Sat Mar 26, 2005 5:39 pm

kmhowe72 wrote: my husband and I don't have a log distance relationship. he lives 6 min. away from me.
That's still six minutes further away than most married couples.

Post by **Betty Boop** » Sun Mar 27, 2005 2:09 pm

kmhowe72 wrote: my husband and I don't have a log distance relationship. he lives 6 min. away from me.

Sounds to me like he's residing at his batchelor pad then!!

I've been married ten years, three of which my hubby worked away all week and we were lucky to see him for 36 hours at the weekends, it was hell and nearly destroyed us.

capt_buzzard · Post by **capt_buzzard** » Mon Mar 28, 2005 5:20 am

Betty Boop wrote: Sounds to me like he's residing at his batchelor pad then!!

I've been married ten years, three of which my hubby worked away all week and we were lucky to see him for 36 hours at the weekends, it was hell and nearly destroyed us.
Welcome Betty Boop to FG

devist8me · Post by **devist8me** » Mon Mar 28, 2005 9:52 am

I'm brand new but I'll kick my thought out there

I say if it works for you two, thats great, knock yourself out. I can see why others disagree, only because they couldn't see themselves in the same situation and be comfortable. There is no textbook on how people should live/be married. Only what works for each individual. You've found one that works for you so great.

Incidently, I don't think it would work for me this way as well. However, my husband works 24 and 48 hour shifts so he's gone practically half the week anyway. This gives me my "my time" which I value and when he's home, we appreciate each other more. So I can kinda see where your coming from there.

Angela V

Post by **Betty Boop** » Tue Mar 29, 2005 2:14 am

capt_buzzard wrote: Welcome Betty Boop to FG

Thanks for the welcome!

kmhowe72 · Post by **kmhowe72** » Sun Aug 21, 2005 5:52 pm

We used to fight alot. But now that we have a car. And my husband goes to work. We don't fight as much anymore. And no I am not recommending anything. We are best friends. Just not husband and wife. we act like best friends to. we just don't you know and then go about are business. We do more then just that. As matter fact, we enjoy going to like six flags together. we go the rides together. we talk to each othere all the time.

If he wants to go with friends thats fine. But he always asks me if I want to come along with him. Or we have alot of mutal friends they come over, we go over there. Things like that. There is know cake. he had that when we first got married. But it's not all about it now.

kmhowe72 · Post by **kmhowe72** » Mon Aug 22, 2005 7:51 am

Well I am glad so see there as been a wonderful response to this thread. Just to let you know. This is not by anymeans we live in LALA land. We are always sought with problems but we face them together. And we have such a stronge bond , problems are more easier to take.:wah: