Dreading Valentines Day?

Post by **Betty Boop** » Mon Feb 12, 2007 5:18 pm

Tell him the truth?

It's about the only thing you can do Pinky! :-4

Bill Sikes · Post by **Bill Sikes** » Mon Feb 12, 2007 5:20 pm

Pinky;547986 wrote: WTF do I do?

If you are set on your course, politely decline the invitation, giving your concise

reasons. You can't reasonably (if you are sure) do anything else.

Post by **Betty Boop** » Mon Feb 12, 2007 5:27 pm

Pinky;547993 wrote: If I do that it will make things so much harder for me in the long run.

However I can't just sleep with him. The thought makes me sick. God, I feel sick already just thinking about it, but if I don't....well, there's much more to face than that.

Your decision hun, no one can make it for you, I had plans, I'll go when I've done this, I'll go when I've saved money etc etc. There is always something that gets in the way of the plan.

Bill Sikes · Post by **Bill Sikes** » Mon Feb 12, 2007 5:29 pm

Pinky;547993 wrote: [snip]but if I don't....well, there's much more to face than that.

IMO, having myself had quite a lot of trauma in the relationship line, there's

nothing worse than being in a relationship that you know is wrong, yet which

you feel you must retain. Stuffing the opposition under those conditions is a

thoroughly demeaning chore, and IMO/E worth avoiding.

Peg · Post by **Peg** » Mon Feb 12, 2007 6:05 pm

Why would anyone want to settle for less than they deserve? It's not fair to stay hoping someone better will come along. When I left my first husband, I had no where to go, no job, and was in fear for my life. I wasn't about to stay and make it easy for him to kill me. I survived. You deserve to be happy. You obviously aren't. Only you can make that happen.

guppy · Post by **guppy** » Mon Feb 12, 2007 6:12 pm

dont worry about ...we luvs ya pinky.......:-4

koan · Post by **koan** » Mon Feb 12, 2007 6:29 pm

No compromise, Pinky.

Be true to yourself. Deal with the consequences when the time arrives.

RedGlitter · Post by **RedGlitter** » Mon Feb 12, 2007 7:55 pm

Pinky;548042 wrote: It sounds pathetic even to me...I have no idea anymore!!!

Do I do something that does my head in for the sake of my future or reject anfd take all the crap that comes from it?

I just don't know which will get to me more.

Either way I lose.

If I take one option, I doubt I'll even be able to come here for a while.

If i take the other, I'll be ok in a few days, but hurt physically rather than emotionally. I guess overall the second is better than the first.

As from Thursday, don't mail me. Don't Pm me. I won't be able to respond.

Pinky, what are you saying here? Do I understand you correctly? Are you going to get beaten up for failing to have sex with the guy or for wanting to leave? Or for any reason whatsoever? With all due respect to you and the fact that I don't know anything about your personal business, if someone is hurting you, get the hell out! Nobody deserves to have a life with someone who hurts them. Nobody.

loser · Post by **loser** » Mon Feb 12, 2007 9:26 pm

RedGlitter;548107 wrote: Pinky, what are you saying here? Do I understand you correctly? Are you going to get beaten up for failing to have sex with the guy or for wanting to leave? Or for any reason whatsoever? With all due respect to you and the fact that I don't know anything about your personal business, if someone is hurting you, get the hell out! Nobody deserves to have a life with someone who hurts them. Nobody.

I was thinking the same thing Red but was too embarrassed ask. When the physical hurt was mentioned in the thread my alarm bells went off. I cannot imagine what it must be like for people to live in such a situation. A real modern day tragedy :-1

WonderWendy3 · Post by **WonderWendy3** » Mon Feb 12, 2007 9:30 pm

:-5 I wrote a response earlier and lost it accidentally...

In Short, I've been there, it's not fun and my heart breaks for Pinky, cause I know there is alot more to it...

Sending lots of :-4 :yh_hugs to Pinky. I only wish the best for you.

RedGlitter · Post by **RedGlitter** » Mon Feb 12, 2007 9:37 pm

I am sure there is a lot more to it, WW, and I like Pinky too, so I'm not making any judgements or anything like that, if that didn't come across. I know about abuse, emotional and physical and that's why I'm saying you have to save yourself before you get killed or fall into the trap of thinking it's the best you can do. :-2

My best to you, Pink, you know that, I hope. :-4

abbey · Post by **abbey** » Tue Feb 13, 2007 2:00 am

Pinky, you're obviously miserable with him, be true to yourself.

I hope you're ok this morning. :-4

buttercup · Post by **buttercup** » Tue Feb 13, 2007 2:17 am

I always thought you were single :-3

Post by **Betty Boop** » Tue Feb 13, 2007 3:13 am

If you are that worried about abuse, any form of abuse then get a court injunction against him. Womens Aid etc are there to help you, use them, they will help you.

What does it matter if you can't be here for a while, I'd rather be free of all ties and without this place for a while than what you're describing.

Carl44 · Post by **Carl44** » Tue Feb 13, 2007 3:27 am

pinky , look on the bright side at least you dont have to buy any valentines cards ,

do what your heart tells you is right , i think your like me in that respect ,wearing your heart on a sleave way of life :-4 its not life or death buddy what ever you decide your strong enough to get through it mate:-6

RedGlitter · Post by **RedGlitter** » Tue Feb 13, 2007 4:54 am

Don't beat yourself up over this Pinky, you've alluded to these things before. What you need to concern yourself with is your plan, whatever that may be. Don't worry about what you said here. Just get safe.

WonderWendy3 · Post by **WonderWendy3** » Tue Feb 13, 2007 5:21 am

RedGlitter;548486 wrote: Don't beat yourself up over this Pinky, you've alluded to these things before. What you need to concern yourself with is your plan, whatever that may be. Don't worry about what you said here. Just get safe.

I agree with Red, in all of her posts. :-4

We care about you Pinky!!:yh_hugs

Galbally · Post by **Galbally** » Tue Feb 13, 2007 6:41 am

I am glad you have been able to open up a little here pinky about the truth of what is happening, you are in a very bad situation in reality and you need all the support you can get from here and elsewhere as well, and honesty in such things is the best policy always, as things that are wrong need to be put right, and thats that. I hope you are alright dear, I will talk to you later about it. :-6

wneelz42 · Post by **wneelz42** » Sat Feb 17, 2007 12:16 pm

I hated V-day.

Red · Post by **Red** » Sat Feb 17, 2007 12:18 pm

Well my bloke suprised me after me saying we werent bothering etc etc, he came in with a huge gift bag full of body shop stuff bless him!

I did feel crap as all id bought him was a box of handmade choccies...well he did say we werent to bother!

wneelz42 · Post by **wneelz42** » Sat Feb 17, 2007 1:15 pm

Men are scumLOL

Red · Post by **Red** » Sat Feb 17, 2007 1:21 pm

wneelz42;552993 wrote: Men are scumLOL

ooooh harsh wneelz! :wah:

Bill Sikes · Post by **Bill Sikes** » Sat Feb 17, 2007 3:19 pm

helefra;548768 wrote: FONT="Book Antiqua"]SIZE="4"]COLOR="Blue"]lips: lips:

Sorry, I thought it was someone who you had met.

ROFL, or similar. Well - she did!

wneelz42 · Post by **wneelz42** » Sun Feb 18, 2007 12:04 pm

Red,

Ok, mabey not all men are scum, just the one's i've dated.:-6

Red · Post by **Red** » Sun Feb 18, 2007 12:06 pm

wneelz42;553675 wrote: Red,

Ok, mabey not all men are scum, just the one's i've dated.:-6

and some ive DEF dated wneelz :rolleyes:

Tink · Post by **Tink** » Tue Feb 27, 2007 12:40 pm

OMG, I cried my eyes out all day!

I got dumped the Friday before