Sexual Promiscuity: RedGlitter Has Questions.

RedGlitter · Post by **RedGlitter** » Sat May 12, 2007 9:54 am

Bad subject line, I know, but I couldn't think how to phrase it better.

It has always irked me to hear someone say a person was promiscuous.

It irks me even more when they say it about a woman, which is almost always the case.

So I'd like to know....

1. How many people do you have to sleep with before you become "promiscuous?" Is there a magic number or something?

2. How come women are "promiscuous" but men are just "being men?" I want to know why men think like this?

I also want to know why we women continue to perpetuate this attitude, putting it onto our daughters and our fellow women? I have even found myself thinking, "what a slut" about women. That's usually when I don't like a woman's behavior around men though, and not because I know she's a sexual being. But still....

3. How long do you have to be dating someone before it's okay to sleep with them? Translated, I want the men here to tell me how long do you want us to wait before being with you, so that you won't lose respect for us if we do?

Please be straightforward with me. I know the double standard exists to this day and it aggravates me and I think it's completely unfair. I grew up with the double standard like most people. I have my own feelings on this stuff but I want to hear those of y'all.

Especially from the men here because I don't really know any guys in my offline life who I'd want to talk to about this stuff.

Thanks.... :-6

laneybug · Post by **laneybug** » Sat May 12, 2007 10:20 am

RedGlitter;611461 wrote: Bad subject line, I know, but I couldn't think how to phrase it better.

It has always irked me to hear someone say a person was promiscuous.

It irks me even more when they say it about a woman, which is almost always the case.

So I'd like to know....

1. How many people do you have to sleep with before you become "promiscuous?" Is there a magic number or something?

2. How come women are "promiscuous" but men are just "being men?" I want to know why men think like this?

I also want to know why we women continue to perpetuate this attitude, putting it onto our daughters and our fellow women? I have even found myself thinking, "what a slut" about women. That's usually when I don't like a woman's behavior around men though, and not because I know she's a sexual being. But still....

3. How long do you have to be dating someone before it's okay to sleep with them? Translated, I want the men here to tell me how long do you want us to wait before being with you, so that you won't lose respect for us if we do?

Please be straightforward with me. I know the double standard exists to this day and it aggravates me and I think it's completely unfair. I grew up with the double standard like most people. I have my own feelings on this stuff but I want to hear those of y'all.

Especially from the men here because I don't really know any guys in my offline life who I'd want to talk to about this stuff.

Thanks.... :-6

Good topic, RG.

1. To me, there is no magic number. But I believe a woman or a man is promiscuous when they throw themselves about to whomever not even considering the risks or consequences. It's not necessarily a number, it's an attitude of not caring enough or having enough discretion to choose who you share you're body with. Yes, it's just sex... but sex is an intimate activity and shouldn't be thrown around without regard. And it's so sad to me to see young women giving it up to anybody just so they'll feel some sense of love or respect, when actually it's usually the opposite.

2. It's not only men that think women are sluts and men "just being men." That's also a female mentality, like you said. America, and probably other places, has a mindset that when a man screws a woman it's a conquering, manly thing to do. I disagree and know plenty of men who feel the same way. Men can be just as big of sluts and be just as promiscuous. It is a double standard and a sad one.

3. As for how long you have to date someone before sleeping with them.... that's all personal choice. I certainly wouldn't date someone who I thought wouldn't respect me or would stop dating me because we had sex. I think there should be enough time to know whether or not you're sexually compatible and hold a lot of the same things in common. As for my fiance and I, we slept together the first time he came over to my place, and we're extremely happy together now. But I had a gut feeling that he wasn't going anywhere or think I was trashy...we both wanted each other and it happened. It felt right. So, I think it should be whenever it feels right.

I personally think promiscuity is not exactly a good thing, whether man or woman. I hold sex in high regard. Yes, it's enjoyable, it's pleasurable, but it should be done with responsibility. There are too many ways to get hurt out there with STD's, getting pregnant, emotional hurt, etc. to just throw it around.

neffy · Post by **neffy** » Sat May 12, 2007 10:25 am

well to be honest i have never been like that not that it is bad nor is it good but it has just been for me.I am an old fashioned fart i guess:wah: :wah: :wah:

The Rob · Post by **The Rob** » Sat May 12, 2007 11:08 am

I'm going to sound terribly vanilla and old-fashioned, but promiscuity on the part of either gender is a really bad idea. Recreational sex is terrific, but it should come (*snicker*) only after a necessary bonding and trust is established between the participants. For anything more casual than that, well...that's why the internet exists.

Carl44 · Post by **Carl44** » Sat May 12, 2007 11:14 am

Pinky;611486 wrote: I agree that going out and picking up random guys isn't good, but I don't see the problem with sleeping with someone on a first date if it's been really good and you're in the mood! I see that as totally different.

I don't think I've ever been dumped for giving someone sleep deprivation for the rest of the night, hehe!:D

Blimey, speaking of which, gotta get a date soon!

:wah:

i have never picked up random guys :-6

suilunguk · Post by **suilunguk** » Sat May 12, 2007 3:15 pm

Hi,

I dont judge anyone and what people do in their life is up to them. I work in a hospital so it is not nice to see people coming in hurt from dates and stuff. If i am in a realtionship i do not go with someone else i will break up with them first, hoping they would do the same for me, very few times that happens. I dont think there is a time limit on when to have sex with someone. I dont have a clue what a slut is male or female. I judge people on the way they treat me. I am a bit old fashioned in the way i look at my sex life and relationship but that is just me. I think a lot is individual thinking and how your individual lives span out. i dont think there will ever be answer. horses for courses.

Take care.

Claire

Mia · Post by **Mia** » Sat May 12, 2007 3:26 pm

There is very much a double standard.Blokes want to sleep with women but

marry virgins..lol from what I understand it goes back to cavemen times when a man needed to spread his seed around. the truth is blokes don't get headaches

and are always in the mood,they can seperate sex from love. I think women need some emotion as well.Saying that times have changed and if a woman gets the urge and has no partner I don't see why she should ot go out on the pull.

Lon · Post by **Lon** » Sat May 12, 2007 3:51 pm

RedGlitter;611461 wrote: Bad subject line, I know, but I couldn't think how to phrase it better.

It has always irked me to hear someone say a person was promiscuous.

It irks me even more when they say it about a woman, which is almost always the case.

So I'd like to know....

1. How many people do you have to sleep with before you become "promiscuous?" Is there a magic number or something?

2. How come women are "promiscuous" but men are just "being men?" I want to know why men think like this?

I also want to know why we women continue to perpetuate this attitude, putting it onto our daughters and our fellow women? I have even found myself thinking, "what a slut" about women. That's usually when I don't like a woman's behavior around men though, and not because I know she's a sexual being. But still....

3. How long do you have to be dating someone before it's okay to sleep with them? Translated, I want the men here to tell me how long do you want us to wait before being with you, so that you won't lose respect for us if we do?

Please be straightforward with me. I know the double standard exists to this day and it aggravates me and I think it's completely unfair. I grew up with the double standard like most people. I have my own feelings on this stuff but I want to hear those of y'all.

Especially from the men here because I don't really know any guys in my offline life who I'd want to talk to about this stuff.

Thanks.... :-6

As of yet, I don't see any response from my sex. As a 72 year old male with more than his fair share of sexual encounters over the years, allow me to share my thoughts.

Firstly, I have never thought a woman to be promiscous merely on the number of sexual encounters she has had. I think of females as being either cheap or classy or somewhere in between. Do they act cheap and slutty? By that I mean, out of the sack, or do they act classy, have confidence and some style. Granted, most men, not all, are bothered by females that have had a number of partners. Their hang up is comparison. They hate having their performance compared. I suspect females feel the same way about this.

When do you first have sex after meeting a female? I have never had any expectations as to when or how soon, but have just let things evolve. Sometimes it was on first encounter, other times after many dates. I have always let the female decide and have never pushed for sex. People, both male and female with sexual hangups, generally (IMO), have other personality disorders.

laneybug · Post by **laneybug** » Sat May 12, 2007 6:16 pm

I certainly hope it's not a "sexual hangup" to not care for promiscuity from either men or women. If it is, it's a sexual hangup I don't mind having, in that case.

Peg · Post by **Peg** » Sat May 12, 2007 6:37 pm

Excellent topic RG!

1. How many people do you have to sleep with before you become "promiscuous?" Is there a magic number or something?

I don't think there is a magic number. A lady that comes into the bar where I work is a prime example of promiscuous. She goes man to man to man. Whoever has the most money, and gives her the most attention, is the lucky (or unlucky, which ever the case may be) guy for the night. It's been known to change nightly.

I think it's a lack of self respect on both people's parts.

2. How come women are "promiscuous" but men are just "being men?" I want to know why men think like this?

I don't think there is a difference.

I also want to know why we women continue to perpetuate this attitude, putting it onto our daughters and our fellow women? I have even found myself thinking, "what a slut" about women. That's usually when I don't like a woman's behavior around men though, and not because I know she's a sexual being. But still....

3. How long do you have to be dating someone before it's okay to sleep with them? Translated, I want the men here to tell me how long do you want us to wait before being with you, so that you won't lose respect for us if we do?

I don't think there is a magic number of dates where you decide it's okay to have sex. So many people, men and women both, confuse sex with love.

Sex for the sake of getting laid? It's not for me, but I can understand why some would.

Richard Bell · Post by **Richard Bell** » Sat May 12, 2007 9:47 pm

Peg;611879 wrote:

Sex for the sake of getting laid? It's not for me, but I can understand why some would.

Some wood, indeed !!!

Thanks for understanding !

Carl44 · Post by **Carl44** » Sun May 13, 2007 1:20 am

Richard Bell;611900 wrote: Some wood, indeed !!!

Thanks for understanding !

:wah: :wah:

Debra · Post by **Debra** » Sun May 13, 2007 4:26 am

I might be an odd one here. I don't believe in sex before marriage.. I didn't have it til I married my husband. But if people do have sex before marriage then I am no judge so I really don't have an opinion cause it is people's lives. They can do whatever.

laneybug · Post by **laneybug** » Tue May 15, 2007 2:22 pm

Debra;611947 wrote: I might be an odd one here. I don't believe in sex before marriage.. I didn't have it til I married my husband. But if people do have sex before marriage then I am no judge so I really don't have an opinion cause it is people's lives. They can do whatever.

Sex before marriage doesn't instantly equal promiscuity.

As for me, you better believe I'm having sex with a man before I marry him. There are too many factors about sex to leave it a mystery until the night after your wedding day. What if his sexual desires are different than yours? What if it really isn't pleasurable not matter what you do? What if the two of you just don't "click" sexually? These, and more, are all questions I need answered before making it to the big day. I'm not saying that sex is all of what makes a relationship tick, but it's definitely part of it, and when you don't agree sexually, it can become a problem.

Bill Sikes · Post by **Bill Sikes** » Tue May 15, 2007 2:50 pm

RedGlitter;611461 wrote: It has always irked me to hear someone say a person was B]promiscuous.

It irks me even more when they say it about a woman, which is almost always the case.

Really? Not IMO/E. Women or men can be promiscuous. This trait IMO is attractive in neither sex.

RedGlitter;611461 wrote: So I'd like to know....

1. How many people do you have to sleep with before you become "promiscuous?" Is there a magic number or something?

I do not think there's a magic number. It's all about expectations and standards. There's a world of difference between just having it off with loads of people (or just having a fling from time to time) for "recreational" purposes and trying to facilitate deciding about that "someone".

RedGlitter;611461 wrote: 2. How come women are "promiscuous" but men are just "being men?" I want to know why men think like this?

They'r all tarts, equally and each to each. It's not good to be "sexist" about this sort of thing.

RedGlitter;611461 wrote: I also want to know why we women continue to perpetuate this attitude, putting it onto our daughters and our fellow women? I have even found myself thinking, "what a slut" about women. That's usually when I don't like a woman's behavior around men though, and not because I know she's a sexual being. But still....

Human nature, I think. Many, many animals mate for life. The human sort are just another example. That said, if we're supposed to be a "higher form" then I'm surprised at some of our sort.

RedGlitter;611461 wrote: 3. How long do you have to be dating someone before it's okay to sleep with them? Translated, I want the men here to tell me how long do you want us to wait before being with you, so that you won't lose respect for us if we do?

Sounds like bollocks to me. I refer the Honourable Lady to her previous question "How many people do you have to [...]". There's no "magic number". If either sex goes off the boil/loses respect due to time (within extreme limits) then they're not of the higher form, only tarts, as alluded to earlier! This isn't to say that once things are decided that the respective parties shouldn't go to it like hammer and tongs!

RedGlitter;611461 wrote: 6

YZGI · Post by **YZGI** » Tue May 15, 2007 2:51 pm

RedGlitter;611461 wrote: Bad subject line, I know, but I couldn't think how to phrase it better.

It has always irked me to hear someone say a person was promiscuous.

It irks me even more when they say it about a woman, which is almost always the case.

So I'd like to know....

1. How many people do you have to sleep with before you become "promiscuous?" Is there a magic number or something? A dozen, Or 13 if you are a baker. Also you can add one for each baker you do.

2. How come women are "promiscuous" but men are just "being men?" I want to know why men think like this? Men don't think like this. Women just think we think like this, we want all women to be promiscuous with us individually

I also want to know why we women continue to perpetuate this attitude, putting it onto our daughters and our fellow women? I have even found myself thinking, "what a slut" about women. That's usually when I don't like a woman's behavior around men though, and not because I know she's a sexual being. But still.... Because you women are catty and are in competition for us males

3. How long do you have to be dating someone before it's okay to sleep with them? Translated, I want the men here to tell me how long do you want us to wait before being with you, so that you won't lose respect for us if we do?17 minutes if the date is with me, 2 hours or as soon as the movie is over if dating someone else.

Please be straightforward with me. I know the double standard exists to this day and it aggravates me and I think it's completely unfair. I grew up with the double standard like most people. I have my own feelings on this stuff but I want to hear those of y'all.

Especially from the men here because I don't really know any guys in my offline life who I'd want to talk to about this stuff.

Thanks.... :-6

I assume the highlighted line in your post is a double entendre?:wah: :wah:

RedGlitter · Post by **RedGlitter** » Tue May 15, 2007 3:21 pm

YZGI;613596 wrote: I assume the highlighted line in your post is a double entendre?:wah: :wah:

:o Dang! I totally missed that YZ! :wah:

For once at FG I was being serious and look what happened!

Carl44 · Post by **Carl44** » Tue May 15, 2007 3:24 pm

RedGlitter;613644 wrote:

Dang! I totally missed that YZ! :wah:

For once at FG I was being serious and look what happened!

i know w you mean redglitter that unsoberano and yz ruin all my serious posts also with their constant childish interuptions :wah: :wah:

RedGlitter · Post by **RedGlitter** » Tue May 15, 2007 3:28 pm

:wah:

Debra · Post by **Debra** » Tue May 15, 2007 3:38 pm

laneybug wrote

Sex before marriage doesn't instantly equal promiscuity.

As for me, you better believe I'm having sex with a man before I marry him. There are too many factors about sex to leave it a mystery until the night after your wedding day. What if his sexual desires are different than yours? What if it really isn't pleasurable not matter what you do? What if the two of you just don't "click" sexually? These, and more, are all questions I need answered before making it to the big day. I'm not saying that sex is all of what makes a relationship tick, but it's definitely part of it, and when you don't agree sexually, it can become a problem

I disagree. I have been married going on 15 years... Happily married too.

In my opinion people who have sex before marriage is more likely to catch aids or other diseases than married couples.Even though there are married couples may get aids by cheating but it is a low rate.. than people who have sex before marriage. Condoms isn't 100 percent protected. I rather be safe than regrettin something. Not trying to be mean , force things or to bash. Just voicing my opinions.

cars · Post by **cars** » Tue May 15, 2007 4:35 pm

laneybug;611476 wrote: Good topic, RG.

1. To me, there is no magic number. But I believe a woman or a man is promiscuous when they throw themselves about to whomever not even considering the risks or consequences. It's not necessarily a number, it's an attitude of not caring enough or having enough discretion to choose who you share you're body with. Yes, it's just sex... but sex is an intimate activity and shouldn't be thrown around without regard. And it's so sad to me to see young women giving it up to anybody just so they'll feel some sense of love or respect, when actually it's usually the opposite.

2. It's not only men that think women are sluts and men "just being men." That's also a female mentality, like you said. America, and probably other places, has a mindset that when a man screws a woman it's a conquering, manly thing to do. I disagree and know plenty of men who feel the same way. Men can be just as big of sluts and be just as promiscuous. It is a double standard and a sad one.

3. As for how long you have to date someone before sleeping with them.... that's all personal choice. I certainly wouldn't date someone who I thought wouldn't respect me or would stop dating me because we had sex. I think there should be enough time to know whether or not you're sexually compatible and hold a lot of the same things in common. As for my fiance and I, we slept together the first time he came over to my place, and we're extremely happy together now. But I had a gut feeling that he wasn't going anywhere or think I was trashy...we both wanted each other and it happened. It felt right. So, I think it should be whenever it feels right.

I personally think promiscuity is not exactly a good thing, whether man or woman. I hold sex in high regard. Yes, it's enjoyable, it's pleasurable, but it should be done with responsibility. There are too many ways to get hurt out there with STD's, getting pregnant, emotional hurt, etc. to just throw it around.

What laney said, right on!

Promiscuity to some of us old folks (to me) would be (man or woman) someone who does "the deed" right after meeting for the first time. No first date, no dinner, no getting to know one another, no nothing, just getting picked up in a bar, store, or where ever, night after night, for never ending "one-night" stands! :wah:

RedGlitter · Post by **RedGlitter** » Tue May 15, 2007 4:37 pm

magenta flame;613667 wrote: I sort of agree with Debra. For those who have multiple partners have you ever worried afterwards as to whether you have caught anything? I don't mean the serious deseases I mean like mouth herpes or crabs. Was your partner clean? Or were you too drunk to notice?

Just wondering .

Are you assuming everyone who has been with "multiple partners" had to be drunk to do it? That they couldn't have had a meaningful connection with more than one person? And are you assuming that one person is "clean" but more than one is automatically not? I know where you're going, I just don't like the assumptiveness.

laneybug · Post by **laneybug** » Tue May 15, 2007 5:44 pm

Debra;613663 wrote: laneybug wrote

Sex before marriage doesn't instantly equal promiscuity.

As for me, you better believe I'm having sex with a man before I marry him. There are too many factors about sex to leave it a mystery until the night after your wedding day. What if his sexual desires are different than yours? What if it really isn't pleasurable not matter what you do? What if the two of you just don't "click" sexually? These, and more, are all questions I need answered before making it to the big day. I'm not saying that sex is all of what makes a relationship tick, but it's definitely part of it, and when you don't agree sexually, it can become a problem

I disagree. I have been married going on 15 years... Happily married too.

In my opinion people who have sex before marriage is more likely to catch aids or other diseases than married couples.Even though there are married couples may get aids by cheating but it is a low rate.. than people who have sex before marriage. Condoms isn't 100 percent protected. I rather be safe than regrettin something. Not trying to be mean , force things or to bash. Just voicing my opinions.

How are people who have sex before marriage more likely to catch an STD? It's entirely possible that the man or woman a person marries could have an STD and they could get it from them. And even if two people were never sexually active before each other, there are many scenarios where you can catch herpes or hepatitis, etc. Take cold sores, for example. Those are herpes. Herpes simplex, to be exact.

laneybug · Post by **laneybug** » Tue May 15, 2007 5:52 pm

magenta flame;613667 wrote: I sort of agree with Debra. For those who have multiple partners have you ever worried afterwards as to whether you have caught anything? I don't mean the serious deseases I mean like mouth herpes or crabs. Was your partner clean? Or were you too drunk to notice?

Just wondering .

Wow... it sounds like you're assuming a lot, magenta. Like RG said, do people have to be drunk in your opinion in order to have had multiple partners in their lifetime? I think a little STD education is in order here. They are called sexually transmitted diseases, but there are many other ways they can be spread.

You ever get a cold sore? Those are herpes, like I said in my previous post. As for crabs. Sit on someone's sofa who has them. You'll likely get them. You can get the "less serious" STD's that we know of from activities other than sex, that just happens to be one of the ways to spread them.

Post by **Bryn Mawr** » Wed May 16, 2007 6:03 pm

laneybug;613693 wrote: How are people who have sex before marriage more likely to catch an STD? It's entirely possible that the man or woman a person marries could have an STD and they could get it from them. And even if two people were never sexually active before each other, there are many scenarios where you can catch herpes or hepatitis, etc. Take cold sores, for example. Those are herpes. Herpes simplex, to be exact.

Your logic is skewed somewhere.

If you stick to a single partner, regardless of pre or post marrage, and if you partner is also faithfull, then you have a single window for infection.

For each additional partner either you or your spouse takes on, there is an aditional window for infection.

That is all that is being suggested.

Once you start bringing morals into it you start to muddy the water.

Simple stats show that the earlier you start and the more partners you have, the more likely you are to contract VD (including cervical cancer).

laneybug · Post by **laneybug** » Thu May 17, 2007 7:33 pm

Bryn Mawr;614742 wrote: Your logic is skewed somewhere.

If you stick to a single partner, regardless of pre or post marrage, and if you partner is also faithfull, then you have a single window for infection.

For each additional partner either you or your spouse takes on, there is an aditional window for infection.

That is all that is being suggested.

Once you start bringing morals into it you start to muddy the water.

Simple stats show that the earlier you start and the more partners you have, the more likely you are to contract VD (including cervical cancer).

I never said that having sex with multiple partners didn't open the window for greater risk of infection. I was simply stating that there are many ways to get infected, regardless of how many partners you've had. You could very well be abstinent and still get HIV, for example. Using the STD scare to influence people to wait until marriage to have sex is skewed logic itself, in my opinion.

laneybug · Post by **laneybug** » Thu May 17, 2007 7:40 pm

magenta flame;614752 wrote: Were they nude when this happened?

UUUmmmm lanebug? I sure hope one of your boyfriends didn't use that excuse.:-2

http://www.medicinenet.com/pubic_lice_crabs/article.htm

http://shprc.stanford.edu/ch4_cra.html

Ummmm no, magenta. None of my boyfriends have used this "excuse." And no, in that particular example, they were not nude. Crabs don't simply inhabit pubic hair. They can infect beards, the scalp, eyebrows even. They can basically "jump" on you the way fleas can when you pet an animal or lay/sit on something that is infected. Same idea.

I didn't bother reading the articles you posted. I work in health care, my fiance is an RN, I know what I'm talking about. There are some viruses and bacteria that can live on a surface, say a toilet seat, for several hours to several days. A person can become infected with many things through indirect contact, meaning touching something that someone who was infected has touched. Sexual contact is not the only way to get what is normally considered an STD, and that's all I was stating earlier.

laneybug · Post by **laneybug** » Thu May 17, 2007 7:45 pm

magenta flame;614748 wrote: I think it's you who is assuming here ........................You began the thread on promiscurity, definition of which in the english language is as follows.

http://www.thefreedictionary.com/promiscuous

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.p ... romiscuity

http://www.wordwebonline.com/en/PROMISCUITY

http://www.m-w.com/cgi-bin/dictionary?va=promiscuous

what the heck does 'meaningful connection' have to do with it?

Know you don't, but I'm sure it's important to you that 'you think you do'.

what? You read peoples minds now ? Well read this

You go on about how proud you are of yourself speaking your mind ...............well how come you're not mute?

If you want to run a one way conversation with yourself that's fine ..........whatever.

You know magenta, I don't always agree with what RG says. I don't always agree with what many people on say. And the same goes for what I say... many people disagree with me all the time. But to write something that comes off as down right nasty seems to be very unproductive to me. In this case, I agree with RG. You seemed to be assuming things when you asked if people were "just too drunk to notice." And RG is right. Does one have to be drunk in order to have more than one partner in their life?

I don't see how RG is running a one way conversation here. You didn't bother to answer any of her questions or to respond in a meaningful way. You threw a bunch of online articles at her and basically told her off. Perhaps you are the one having the one way conversation??

laneybug · Post by **laneybug** » Thu May 17, 2007 7:51 pm

magenta flame;615704 wrote: really ? because one of those articles is saying eactly the opposite to what yu've just said

.

Yup. Really. I couldn't care less what the article says, to be honest. I wouldn't care if it was written by the president himself. I know what my experience has shown me.

By the way, it wasn't me who got the crabs! :wah: I've never had them, thank god. Nasty buggers.

Hmmm... I wonder if I grossed everyone out by saying that the cold sore you may get every winter is actually herpes. A family member of the herpes one gets in their crotch.

RedGlitter · Post by **RedGlitter** » Fri May 18, 2007 3:24 am

Magenta, if I thought your diatribe was worth responding to at length I would, however it seems to me that you're just spoiling to be argumentative and I'm not interested.

Post by **Bryn Mawr** » Fri May 18, 2007 3:56 am

laneybug;615694 wrote: I never said that having sex with multiple partners didn't open the window for greater risk of infection. I was simply stating that there are many ways to get infected, regardless of how many partners you've had. You could very well be abstinent and still get HIV, for example. Using the STD scare to influence people to wait until marriage to have sex is skewed logic itself, in my opinion.

It certainly didn't come over that way. You asked "How are people who have sex before marriage more likely to catch an STD?" as though it was not a possible factor. I pointed out how it could be.

laneybug · Post by **laneybug** » Fri May 18, 2007 2:44 pm

magenta flame;615716 wrote: Lets just go back to this post for a minute.....................How did red assume my assumptions...........How ?

How did she get that from my post. ---->

Where in my post did I write "everyone" has to be drunk to do it? where in my post did I make a distinction and split people into clean or unclean ...what the hell does she mean by "I know where you're going " .............WHAT?

I answer her post by giving the definition of a term that describes a certain (commonly held belief ) of a Psychologically distructive human behaviour.

sexual Promiscurity or (sexually acting out) begins at a very early age and continues into adulthood it is usually exibihited by those who have deep emotional issues either long term or temporary. It is usually termed in other ways of "casual interludes', 'casual sex' and many other terms making it socially acceptable within a peer situation.

Redglitter has in her first post said that the term "irks" her. Tell me, how can a word used to denote a human behaviour irk someone?

Redglitter wants to bring a psychologically damaging behaviour which often leads to rape, homicide, feelings of worthlessness, and many other factors under the umbrella of feminism, free will and socially acceptable freedoms.

well I say BAHHUMBUG.

Who here has never seen a drunk woman leave a bar or night club with a man they have just met? No one? Why has this woman put herself in to this dangerous situation . Logic? don't think so. A human connecton ? Purlease!

Who the hell sits next to a person on a train and immediately strikes up a conversation about sex and invites another to come and have sex with them. and the other immediately agrees to it? It happens all the time (not especially on trains but you get the idea)this behaviour is chronically damaging to a person health and is a damaging display of deeper psychological issues

We are not talking about 'serial relationships' which has an entirely different meaning we are talking about promiscurity. People who put themselves out there openly to be "used" in a sexual way, because they feel unloved lonely or unfulfilled. And feel the encounter will fill an emotional void within them.

In that case, magenta, I agree with you. Yes, I believe promiscuity is a mental health concern and is a damaging behavior in many regards, which you pointed out. As for trying to put promiscuity under the guise of feminism and all that BS, I'm with you on that one, it shouldn't be. There is nothing feminist about spreading your legs open for all to have a chance at, excuse my bluntness.

I'm fairly disappointed that RG felt your post wasn't worth responding to, because there are many issues you've raised that are definitely worth reply.

No, I don't believe you're being argumentative for the sake of being argumentative. This is a very touchy thread, and if both sides aren't willing to listen to each other, then there wasn't much point in starting it to begin with.

As for labeling a woman who's simply had multiple partners in the course of her life as promiscuous, I disagree. Labeling a woman promiscuous for chronic behavior in the context that you've described, I agree with that fully.

laneybug · Post by **laneybug** » Fri May 18, 2007 2:48 pm

Bryn Mawr;615801 wrote: It certainly didn't come over that way. You asked "How are people who have sex before marriage more likely to catch an STD?" as though it was not a possible factor. I pointed out how it could be.

When I asked "How are people who have sex before marriage more likely to catch an STD?" I should've clarified that marriage doesn't make you exempt from STDs altogether, which is what it seemed like the poster I replied to was saying.

I should've stated from the beginning that it was possible to catch an STD even after marriage, by other means than "sexual contact."

RedGlitter · Post by **RedGlitter** » Fri May 18, 2007 3:04 pm

laneybug;616303 wrote:

I'm fairly disappointed that RG felt your post wasn't worth responding to, because there are many issues you've raised that are definitely worth reply.

I started this thread for one reason only and it wasn't so I could get lectures on STDs. I'm only interested in the moral factor. And no, I didn't feel that post was worth responding to and I still don't.

laneybug · Post by **laneybug** » Fri May 18, 2007 4:09 pm

RedGlitter;616339 wrote: I started this thread for one reason only and it wasn't so I could get lectures on STDs. I'm only interested in the moral factor. And no, I didn't feel that post was worth responding to and I still don't.

STDs can definitely go hand in hand with promiscuity, which is why some people think it's a moral no-no.

And magenta wasn't only talking about STDs. She mentioned the moral issues as well.

But if you don't feel it's worth replying to, than don't. Understandable enough.