Redneck Joke - Yeehaw!!

turbonium · Post by **turbonium** » Sat May 07, 2005 7:55 pm

Had to post this joke - it cracked me up...

Redneck 911

A couple of redneck hunters are out in the woods when one of them falls to the ground. He doesn't seem to be breathing; his eyes are rolled back in his head.

The other redneck starts to panic, then whips out his cell phone and calls 911.

He frantically blurts out to the operator, "O my gawd! Help! My friend just died. He's Dead! What can I do?"

The operator, trying to calm him says, "Take it easy. I can help. Just listen to me and follow my instructions. First, lets make sure he's dead."

There's a short pause, and then the operator hears a loud gun shot!!!

The redneck comes back on the line and says, "OK, now what?"

:wah:

lady cop · Post by **lady cop** » Sat May 07, 2005 8:03 pm

as a resident of redneck central, i love this! last hurricane, this is no joke, we were in direct line of fire of a category 5. and i watched these people stock up on beer. i guess if you're going to die you need to be drunk. all they cared about was getting their beer!!!

turbonium · Post by **turbonium** » Sat May 07, 2005 8:12 pm

hehe! - well, they DO have their priorities!!

Peg · Post by **Peg** » Sat May 07, 2005 8:23 pm

LOL LC--When I worked at a grocery store and a large snowstorm was predicted, people would swamp us to buy beer, milk, bread, and cigarettes. Not ever did they buy baby food or diapers. I guess if they get the babies drunk enough they wouldn't care their diaper needs changed?

nvalleyvee · Post by **nvalleyvee** » Sat May 07, 2005 10:22 pm

As a self avowed Redneck woman - I found the original joke quite humorous as I am very able to laugh and poke fun at what people think are stereotypical behaviours. BUT - to imply that only rednecks would buy beer and cigarettes instead of food and diapers for their children to get through an impending disaster offended me. I am hoping this was offered as a joke and I am just being too darned sensitive.

abbey · Post by **abbey** » Sun May 08, 2005 12:35 am

What is a redneck?

lady cop · Post by **lady cop** » Sun May 08, 2005 12:47 am

abbey wrote: What is a redneck?it's a reference to dumb southerners. derives from them having a red neck working in the sun picking cotton or watching over slaves. it usually refers to trailer-dwelling really stupid jerry-springer-type people who are screwing their sisters and are inbred. with only a few teeth and an IQ equal to asparagus.

lady cop · Post by **lady cop** » Sun May 08, 2005 12:54 am

...

YOU MIGHT BE A REDNECK IF ... REDNECK...You might be a redneck if... (redneck jokes)

www.fortogden.com/foredneck.html -

abbey · Post by **abbey** » Sun May 08, 2005 1:11 am

lady cop wrote: ...

YOU MIGHT BE A REDNECK IF ... REDNECK...You might be a redneck if... (redneck jokes)

www.fortogden.com/foredneck.html - Genitalia is'nt an Italian airline???

You learn something new every day :wah:

BTS · Post by **BTS** » Sun May 08, 2005 8:54 am

lady cop wrote: it's a reference to dumb southerners. derives from them having a red neck working in the sun picking cotton or watching over slaves. it usually refers to trailer-dwelling really stupid jerry-springer-type people who are screwing their sisters and are inbred. with only a few teeth and an IQ equal to asparagus.

as a resident of redneck central, i love this! last hurricane, this is no joke, we were in direct line of fire of a category 5. and i watched these people stock up on beer. i guess if you're going to die you need to be drunk. all they cared about was getting their beer!!! Typical YANKEE showing their ignorance on yet another subject.

lady cop · Post by **lady cop** » Sun May 08, 2005 8:58 am

BTS wrote: Typical YANKEE showing her ignorance on yet another subject.you can't bait me . i am far from ignorant and what i said is true in re: the derivation of the word redneck.

BTS · Post by **BTS** » Sun May 08, 2005 9:11 am

lady cop wrote: you can't bait me . i am far from ignorant and what i said is true in re: the derivation of the word redneck.
Not baiting LC,

The definition I find says nothing about slave owners riding roughshod over slaves, inbreds, screwing their sisters, Iq equeal to veggies etc...

Those are your thoughts and feelings about a class of people.

I just think it is a ignorant view.

Living out here in New Mexico I see many cases of poor Hispanics doing many things that woul qualify them for the REDNECK hall of fame.

Redneck is now a REAL word and defined in the dictionary, so to enlighten you I will paste it for you and other Yankee Imports.

Definitions of redneck on the Web:

a poor white person in the southern United States

www.cogsci.princeton.edu/cgi-bin/webwn

In modern usage, redneck predominantly refers to a particular stereotype of whites from the Southern United States. The word can be used either as a pejorative or as a matter of pride, depending on context.

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Redneck

john8pies · Post by **john8pies** » Sun May 08, 2005 9:18 am

wicked, really wicked, and very, very funny, thank you!

nvalleyvee · Post by **nvalleyvee** » Sun May 08, 2005 8:12 pm

Where I grew up - southern NM - the term redneck refers to the working ranchers and their families - as opposed to the people who lived in town.

Wolverine · Post by **Wolverine** » Sun May 08, 2005 11:09 pm

I would have to agree with LC on this. The Jerry Springer types, no teeth, IQ of a Kumquat. Lord knows i have plenty in my family tree.

webbie · Post by **webbie** » Fri Oct 28, 2005 5:48 pm

As I Am From Redneck Land, A Redneck Is One, Due To Being Out In The Sun Working And A Permantely Colored Neck, From The Sun. A True Redneck Is A Hard Working Man/woman Who Is Outside All Day Every Day. The Reason A Redneck Is Slow, Is Because They Pace Themselves At What They Are Doing. By Doing This He/she Will Get As Much Done As Another Person Who Goes Like A Bat Out Of Hell, But Has To Stop To Take Breaks. As For Being Inbred, Yeah That Has Happened, But It Gets Awful Lonely Living Up The Hollors, With Not Much Contact With The Outside World. I Am From The Eastern Mountains Of Kentucky. I Have Been There Done That.