Americans and Manners

[Lon]

OK--I have managed to irritate a few with my previous generalizations, here's some more. As a GENERAL RULE, I have found southerners and folks from the midwest to be the politest and have the best manners. New Yorkers??? In your face let em have twixt the eye balls. Rude, loud & overbearing. The northeast, west coast & Rocky Mountain states seems to be a mixed bag, but polite and courteous for the most part. Same for the rest of the states.

[WonderWendy3]

I'm from Maryland...raised by Pennsylvanians....raised to open doors for people, say thank you, excuse me and all that good stuff. I think it has a lot to do with the way you are raised....and of course we do generalize New Yorkers..but not all of them are like that.

[RedGlitter]

Lon, when it rains it pours; are you working for Morton Salt? :rolleyes:

I don't know about that too much...southerners are just as rude except they have a special finessed way of showing it. If you've ever seen a proper southern man, you'll know what I mean.



NYers and Californians will tell you to kiss off in no uncertain terms. They're just forward like that.

Okies will do the same but will help your butt to the door as a courtesy. :wah:

Arizonans are too damn hot to put up with anybody's crap and we'll probably threaten to shoot you.

It's more in the bringing up of the individual I think....

I like to think so anyway...

[KB.]

Lon;631238 wrote: OK--I have managed to irritate a few with my previous generalizations, here's some more. As a GENERAL RULE, I have found southerners and folks from the midwest to be the politest and have the best manners. New Yorkers??? In your face let em have twixt the eye balls. Rude, loud & overbearing. The northeast, west coast & Rocky Mountain states seems to be a mixed bag, but polite and courteous for the most part. Same for the rest of the states.


Well I'm born and raised Southern so I give this my biased seal of approval. I have lived in TN, TX, and MO (which ain't the South anymore), I have spent extended periods of time in CA, Louisianna, and AZ. I will say the same thing here as I did in the high volume thread. It has very little to do with geography anymore. When I lived in Houston there were six million people there, and it had just taken the most diverse city in the nation from New York, NY. They weren't Southern and accused me of it on a daily basis, even though they were as far south as you could get with out leaving the country. New Orleans was and is still Southern (It is a state of mind not a location). I had the best Southern food and service ever in a small diner in eastern California, I even shared a story about it here; it is titled "I Won Thirty Bucks". When ever I am living somewhere outside of TN, people always want to talk about how nice Southerners are, but take it from someone that has spent the majority of thier life here; it is not always the case. There are two other people on this forum from the same small town of 14k (?) that I am living in now. I am sure they can bare witness.

I open doors, say thank you, yes mam, no sir, and please. I don't cuss or smoke in front of small children, or old ladies. I was also raised by good people who cared about how I went about in the world. <-------That is the root of it right there.

[Lon]

RedGlitter;631240 wrote: Lon, when it rains it pours; are you working for Morton Salt? :rolleyes:

I don't know about that too much...southerners are just as rude except they have a special finessed way of showing it. If you've ever seen a proper southern man, you'll know what I mean.



NYers and Californians will tell you to kiss off in no uncertain terms. They're just forward like that.

Okies will do the same but will help your butt to the door as a courtesy. :wah:

Arizonans are too damn hot to put up with anybody's crap and we'll probably threaten to shoot you.

It's more in the bringing up of the individual I think....

I like to think so anyway...


Area has a lot to due with it, as does peer pressure. I grew up in New Jersey and was a polite kid but saying no mam and yes sir was not a part of my upbringing. I moved to Colorado at age 12 and all my friends yes mam'd and no sir'ed to death. I followed suit. Then at age 14 I moved to California and all my friends thought I was a dork because I said yes mam and no sir to the teachers, so I dropped that bit of politeness real quick. I married a Southern girl and all her family, friends and relatives were sooooo polite, except towards blacks.

[KB.]

Lon;631243 wrote: except towards blacks.


You sir are clever. I was raised by people who never said an ignorant word or used a slur in the thirty years I have known them. Don't make it all about the Southerners, the family may have been from the South, but ignorance is universal. I saw way more of it in MO and CA than I ever have here in TN. Hell, one of the things I mentioned in a recent story was moving back to a place where ignorance and bigotry weren't the norm.

[KB.]

magenta flame;631248 wrote: Have to admit though I have noticed and heard that getting up and giving your seat to old ladies and pregnant women on public transport is very lacking these days.


Last time I was on public transport someone tried to stab me. I'd sooner carry the old lady and the pregnant gal on my back to where ever they were going.

[Lon]

KB.;631245 wrote: You sir are clever. I was raised by people who never said an ignorant word or used a slur in the thrity years I have known them. Don't make it all about the Southerners, the family may have been from the South, but ignorance is universal. I saw way more of it in MO and CA than I ever have here in TN. Hell, one of the things I mentioned in a recent story was moving back to a place where ignorance and bigotry weren't the norm.


Yes, I do make it all about Sotherners. Bigotry exists everywhere, but I saw personally enough violent behavior towards blacks (pre civil rights) at the hands of southern relatives. The Civil Rights Movement was in the South as were the majority of lynchings. The KKK flourished in the South, so come on, get real.

[NotToday]

I'm going to find a happy thread now.

bye bye.

[KB.]

Lon;631256 wrote: Yes, I do make it all about Sotherners. Bigotry exists everywhere, but I saw personally enough violent behavior towards blacks (pre civil rights) at the hands of southern relatives. The Civil Rights Movement was in the South as were the majority of lynchings. The KKK flourished in the South, so come on, get real.


So we are talking about manners in the past tense then? Let me get the statistics for hate crimes over the past ten years and see where the majority have occured.

[Sweet Tooth]

I have to say that Southeners can be rude too- it's all in the up bringing- big difference between my upbringing and the hubby's - hes from Mississippi and I am from VA- he is a little more blunt then I am and the people in CA are CRAZY!!!! Lived there for 2 years and NEVER want to go back! And I wish the men here where as nice to us poor pregnant people!

[RedGlitter]

Lon;631243 wrote: Area has a lot to due with it, as does peer pressure. I grew up in New Jersey and was a polite kid but saying no mam and yes sir was not a part of my upbringing. I moved to Colorado at age 12 and all my friends yes mam'd and no sir'ed to death. I followed suit. Then at age 14 I moved to California and all my friends thought I was a dork because I said yes mam and no sir to the teachers, so I dropped that bit of politeness real quick. I married a Southern girl and all her family, friends and relatives were sooooo polite, except towards blacks.


I didn't have to use the ma'am and sir stuff either, Lon, but I was taught good manners and I was always a polite girl. Sometimes too much. Different regions have their own ways about them. I hope some of that stuck to me in adulthood but I don't know. :rolleyes: KB is on the mark here when he says it's the people who raise you.

Lon;631256 wrote: Yes, I do make it all about Sotherners. Bigotry exists everywhere, but I saw personally enough violent behavior towards blacks (pre civil rights) at the hands of southern relatives. The Civil Rights Movement was in the South as were the majority of lynchings. The KKK flourished in the South, so come on, get real.


Having never been to the real south for any decent period of time, I can't comment on that. But I did live in California (my parents were married during the Watts riots and my mom grew up in Compton) and I went back to live there again for a time as an adult. Wine Country may be pretty but there are some dang scary places in CA. The best point you made is that bigotry is everywhere.

[NotToday]

Sweet Tooth;631263 wrote: I have to say that Southeners can be rude too- it's all in the up bringing- big difference between my upbringing and the hubby's - hes from Mississippi and I am from VA- he is a little more blunt then I am and the people in CA are CRAZY!!!! Lived there for 2 years and NEVER want to go back! And I wish the men here where as nice to us poor pregnant people!


Anyone anywhere can be rude. We are all different, no matter where we are from. Nothing about one person really makes them any better than the next, especially where they are from. It's what is in someone's heart that makes them who they are, not their location or nationality etc etc. That is a huge part of what is wrong with the world today. We are so quick to judge someone based on what they look like or where they are from instead of actually taking the time to see people for who they really are.

[Lon]

KB.;631260 wrote: So we are talking about manners in the past tense then? Let me get the statistics for hate crimes over the past ten years and see where the majority have occured.


Forget the stats--------it's off topic. The initial post was about manners, not race, bigotry and discrimination. You merely picked up on my comment re: past relations towards blacks.

[NotToday]

Generalizations are just rude and unfair and pretty offensive. I just don't agree with it, and I try in almost all cases possible not to judge someone until I know them. It's sad that so many people have such generalized views of people from other regions and other countries. We all have our faults and our strengths.

[KB.]

NotToday;631268 wrote: Anyone anywhere can be rude. We are all different, no matter where we are from. Nothing about one person really makes them any better than the next, especially where they are from. It's what is in someone's heart that makes them who they are, not their location or nationality etc etc. That is a huge part of what is wrong with the world today. We are so quick to judge someone based on what they look like or where they are from instead of actually taking the time to see people for who they really are.


Just quoted for emphasis. Labels are a poor way to convey knowledge. Good answer there NT.

[KB.]

You know how Skullbone got it's name? They used to have bare knuckled boxing matches way back in the day, way back. They called it skulling bone. My dad's dad used to fight in some of those matches. He was a pretty polite guy too, was a drunk, but always managed to say thank you and please. His favorite baseball player was Bob Gibson.

[NotToday]

KB.;631285 wrote: You know how Skullbone got it's name? They used to have bare knuckled boxing matches way back in the day, way back. They called it skulling bone. My dad's dad used to fight in some of those matches. He was a pretty polite guy too, was a drunk, but always managed to say thank you and please. His favorite baseball player was Bob Gibson.


You are a man full of stories

[KB.]

almostfamous;631297 wrote: I never knew that


Well, I am recounting that from the same Grandfather, and he liked his mulberry moonshine. I have looked the nomenclature up a few times; there are a dozen different stories.

[Richard Bell]

I've met many tourists from Pennsylvania, and all of them have been exceptionally pleasant people.

One guy I met in a restaurant was here on business. He worked for a large bakery in Pennsylvania. He went out to his van, and came back with cupcakes for us. How nice is that ????

I met a couple a few years ago that had moved just north of here from Los Angeles. He was a pompous, overbearing know-it-all. She was just lovely, an absolute delight.

Turns out that he was from small town Ontario (he had been living in LA for a few years), and she was a native Californian.

[Patsy Warnick]

Lon

Your well traveled - encountered more that most of us can just imagine.

Patsy

[weeder]

I am a former New Yorker living in the south. We are the most misunderstood group of people to be found in the US. Ive been " Down Here" for 12 years.

Virginia, Georgia, and back in Virginia again. Ive given this explanation at least 50 times... to the frightened, and narrow minded southerns who I have had to deal with. In order to survive living in New York... that it New York city. I am not talking about upstate NY. Upstate is country. We must become agressive, in order to survive. We are straight forward, determined, strong, and reliable with a work ethic that prepares us for employment anywhere else in this country. We have little patience for slovenly business practices and generally are not drawn to have relationships with people who have hidden agendas. I love the beauty and the grace found in the south. I have difficulty forming frienships here. The most apalling and frustrating thing for me is the way so many of these people think that this is life. Meanwhile, they havent been anywhere else, and have no desire to go anywhere.